After being dismissed for the day, he walked back to his home in the empty Uchiha compound brushing off the pink haired pest the entire way. Once he was home, he continued with his usual afternoon routine. After training until he was about ready to drop, preparing a simple dinner, and studying a manual on Fire jutsu, he went to bed.
Instead of sleeping the whole night through and waking up with the sun like he usually did, he was woken up at one forty-five in the morning by the feeling that there was someone else in the room. He didn't have to search very hard in order to confirm his suspicions, as the intruder who had woken him was standing right next to his bed.
"Sorry I'm late, I got lost on the way over here after I changed directions because I almost tripped over a black cat. Oops, sorry, you don't know me do you? Hi, my name's Obito, and I'm only about half dead really considering the fact that half my body and half my soul are still running around somewhere but, that's a long story that I don't have time to go into... I'll be your first visitor this evening." said a dark haired boy that was about his age, maybe a year or two older at the most. The most notable feature the boy had besides the orange goggles was the fact that he only had one eye.
"What happened to your eye?" he asked the boy whose smile was disturbingly similar to the Uzumaki's.
"Well, I was about to die and wasn't going to be needing it anymore so, since Kakashi needed a new eye I gave it to him as a Jounin present. Thank the gods he isn't nearly as perverted as Jiraiya-sama since I have to watch everything he sees with the damn thing." the boy whose name was Obito said false-cheerfully.
Suddenly, and without any prior warning, the world around them shifted and he found himself watching as the boy before him gave his life to rescue one of his teammates, a teammate who bore a strong resemblance to his new Jounin instructor. There was something after the point at which the Yondaime swooped in and rescued the survivors where the other boy's body seemed to phase through the rocks that had crushed him but, the world started swirling away before he could see what happened.
"Poor Itachi. He never got over my and his uncle Kinmaru's deaths." Obito said as the world shifted again, and they were suddenly at a funeral. Despite the fact that the place was packed with relatives he hadn't seen in years including his father, his eyes were only for his mother who stood stoically like the rest of the clan while she held a sobbing three year old.
"What does That Man have to do with me not being tied up in ninja wire and explosive tags while being rectally violated by a kunai for all eternity?" he asked, getting to the point of why his kinsman was there considering the dream he'd had earlier that day, not too happy to be seeing the one who had killed his family.
"Well, I'm supposed to show you why you shouldn't be an arrogant ass, shouldn't betray your teammates and your village, shouldn't join with the bastard who turned the Nine-Tailed Fox loose on Konoha amongst other things, and aren't supposed to kill the Peacebringer before he could fulfill the Toads' prophesy." Obito said.
"Hn." he said, falling back to old habits. He'd spoken more today than he had for a very long time already, and this situation was so far outside his realm of experience that he didn't even know how to begin to deal with it.
"Well, we should just get on with this." Obito said shrugging.
"If that asshat Madara's to be believed, it all started in the days of the Sage of the Six Paths. The man had two sons, one who had been born with his dojutsu and one who had born without. The eldest son - the one who had been born with the dojutsu - had expected to inherit everything despite the fact that he was an arrogant asshole who had made the waning days of his father's life a living hell..." Obito said as the funeral at which neither of them had been noticed had vanished and was replaced by the type of room you'd see in ancient buildings. In the middle of the room, two middle aged men were kneeling next to a futon upon which an elderly man lay dying.
"...And so I leave everything to you my son." the elderly man said placing his hand in that of the slightly younger looking man who looked to be on the verge of tears. The man who sat next to him looked absolutely pissed as he did this.
"What's this have to do with anything?" he asked as he watched the elder glare daggers at the younger.
"Not much really. That nutjob Madara who Stockholmed my living half said that it was the start of the fighting between the Senju and the Uchiha, who didn't exist yet if I might add. Anyways, I just wanted to see that guy get his for putting chili powder on his father's toilet paper again." Obito said with another of the Uzumaki's grins. "Well, since we're almost out of time maybe I should just fast forward to some more recent history."
Suddenly, they were in a forest watching two Uchiha - one of whom bore an eerie resemblance to him - murder a pair of their clanmates.
"And that's how that thrice damned Mangekyo Sharingan got started. Why Madara and his brother were nuts enough to actually kill their cousins during what was supposed to be a friendly spar, I don't know." Obito said. "Fast forward a few years, and we get to something that relates to you."
He had no Idea what Uchiha Madara storming off after his clan overruled him regarding the founding of Konoha, getting into a fight with the First Hokage, and surviving where he was supposed to have died had to do with anything, and he asked as much.
"Well, this all sets the groundwork for the whole Massacre thing that comes later. I honestly don't know why Madara wanted to be Hokage though, since that job's only for suckers." Obito said.
"Suckers?" he asked, wondering how a spot given to only the strongest of shinobi could be less than a reward.
"Suckers." Obito repeated, smirking mischievously.
Edited 12-25-12