February 3, 2010

I can't stop thinking about that girl, Jess. I know I only met her and her sister (Dear God, please don't ever let me meet her angry again!) today, but I feel something...I feel connected to her. Also, I feel like shit around her. Here I am, perfectly healthy and I'm moping all the time. The girl can't even talk, but she seems so...happy-go-lucky. I'd like to talk to her more, really get to know her. She had intelligence in those beautiful meadow eyes.

Flay told me that he's know her since he's moved here. He meet her in the supermarket and was "instantly intrigued". I can't blame him. He hasn't meet Anna yet. I don't want to be there when they finally do meet. He says that she's a good kid, but cares for her sister too much. The way he said that, it was like she gives herself as an offering or something. I wonder...what it's like to have someone care for you that much.

I've never seen the light at the end of the tunnel. Quite frankly, I've always been slightly pessimistic. Always expect the worst. Seeing her, though, her smile made me feel...lifted. Like there was some hope in the world, somewhere. I just had to find it. Now, I don't even mind the fact that I didn't die in the crash, or that Isolde hates me. It's weird, this feeling. I kinda like it.

Vayne Aurielius

Vayne sat at the dining table, looking at the wanted ads. He had been trying to find a job for a few days now. He didn't want to live off Flay. Who knows how that would come back to bite him in the ass. He twirled the pen he had been using to mark the paper between his fingers. Since he was in Vegas, he thought it would be slightly easier to find some employment. Only thing he could find was butcher or bouncer. Of the two, he was leaning toward butcher.

The voice behind him startled him. "Vayne, what are you doing up so early? It's only 7." He turned around to see Roxis, holding an arm load of papers. The blond settled down beside him, dropping the stack on the table.

"Trying to find a job in the papers. What are you doing?" He eyed the stack. What could it be?

"These are all of Flay's files that I have to go through. He makes me do it the 4th of every month. It's to insure that records are kept properly." Roxis pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose and gave a weary, strained smile. "And for 3 years, I have never found a thing out of place."

Vayne chuckled lightly. "That's Flay for you."

"Exactly. Wants the work done, but won't do it himself. I can't blame him, though. I'm 100x more capable than him." The blond man snorted. "Chaos would be delightful compared to the mess Flay would make."

He almost busted out laughing. He wasn't quite sure if Roxis was being serious, or if he was actually making a joke. Either way, he couldn't disagree. Suddenly a thought hit him. "Hey Roxis?"

"Hm?" His companion didn't tear his eyes from his work.

"You know the people Flay knows, right? I mean, you are his personal assistant."

"Correct. Why?"

The sliver-haired male tried to nonchalantly turn his head away so the other couldn't see the blush creeping up his face. "What can you tell me about Jess?"

Roxis stopped for a moment, then put his work down. "She's a delightful girl and, excuse me for a lack of a better phrase, quite outspoken. She's kind, sweet, and intelligent. Her only flaw really is her letting her sister entertain such ludicrous ideas." He then shuddered.

Vayne cracked a smile. "You've met Anna?"

"...I really don't want to recall that particular time of my life..."

This time he did laugh. "It couldn't be worse than being beat with a box of cereal."

"Oh yes, it can." Roxis then turned thoughtful. "Why do you want to know about Jess?"

"Oh, um–!" Vayne scratched the back of his head. "She just seemed like a nice girl."

A blond eyebrow arched. "That's it?"

"Um, yeah. Do I need another reason?"

"Well, no..." Vayne looked at Roxis hard. Why did it look like he was hiding something? The blond then cleared his throat. "I'm sorry, but I must quit the idle chit-chat. I do have work to do. So, if you don't mind..."

He flinched a little at the almost harsh tone. "Oh, yes. I'm sorry for keeping you."

They both worked in silence for a while afterwards. The longer Vayne stared at the newspaper, the more white and black bled together. Gray. Gray like his whole life. No, not his whole life. Not since yesterday...Maybe it was her charisma? It would make sense. People like him were attracted to people like her. Attracted. It was true, he did find her incredibly beautiful. Too beautiful, in fact. She was too perfect. There had to be something wrong with her. There was no way she could be so...so...perfect.

What would Dr. Zeppel say? Was he looking too much into this? Maybe. Then again, nobody's perfect, right? Why was he even thinking this? He just met her yesterday. Side-effect. A side-effect from his pills. They were making him love-sick, stir-crazy. That made sense... Well, more sense than his new found obsession, anyway. None of this made sense. Nothing made sense since the accident...

The alarm on his wrist watch rang. 9 A.M. Had he been in thought for that long?

Roxis looked up from his paperwork, staring at him oddly. "Why do you have an alarm set for 9 o'clock?"

"N-no reason." He quickly got up and left the room. He made a mad dash for his bedroom, flung open the drawer, and rapidly downed his pills. He could imagine the shame if anyone knew about his pills. He gripped the bottle tightly in his hand. He could hear the seconds tick by as he stared long and hard at it. He was putting too much thought into Jess, way too much. She was just a girl, just a person. Like everyone else. And, like everyone else, she would just leave him. He softly put the bottle back into its safe place.

He looked at his watch. 9:2 A.M. He had been staring for two minutes. If he hurried, Flay might not notice him being late. He sprinted out of his room, trying his hardest to put that happy face on.