Chapter 5

"-k up."

Thin, delicate hands were stroking his hair. Jack shifted and groaned quietly.

"Wake up."

Jack's body glowed with a dull numbness. Trying to move, even a little bit, felt like being struck by lightning. All of his limbs felt rubbery.

"If you don't wake up before he gets back, bad things will happen to you."

"Is that- a threat?" Jack choked, fighting to open his eyes. That stung, too, but he could just make out through bleary eyes-

Slivers of silver, and long, dark eyelashes.

Jack gasped and sat up, ignoring the tearing jolts of pain.

"-You!" he shouted. "You're the one who… who…"

Jack held his head. He couldn't remember anything else. He could see her lips moving in his mind's eye, but couldn't make any sense of it. Something to do with...

Nothing. There was nothing there.

Jack tried to blink away the pain, and very slowly, his eyes came into focus. There was a girl kneeling above him, with her hands on his chest, and her long black hair draping over both of them like a curtain. Jack realized two things, at almost the same time. First, that she was very pretty; second, that he was still nearly completely naked.

"Good morning to you, too," she said, smiling just a little.

Jack looked around the room, the events of the night before slowly returning to him. There was a dark stain on the carpet that he first thought was blood, but then realized was actually spilled wine. He was handcuffed to the couch. Victor was nowhere to be seen.

"Who are you?" Jack asked, rubbing his head with his free hand.

"Let's just say I'm a friend," said the girl. "My name is Clare. I'm here to rescue you."

Clare put her hands on both sides of his face, and before Jack could even register what was happening, she was kissing him. He felt something salty and sickly-sweet flood his mouth.

"Good morning indeed," Jack said, grinning.

"It's just anti-venom," Clare said, face reddening. "Pull your pants on, and then I'll remove the handcuffs for you."

"I love a woman who takes charge," Jack said, doing as he was told.

The girl smiled again, just the tiniest quirk of her lips.

"It might be better if you don't watch this next part," she said. "It's a little bit… embarrassing."

Jack winked, and looked away. From that direction came a series of odd clicks, then a scratching noise, and a snap. The cuffs came free, and Jack's arm slipped away. When Jack looked back at her, Clare was brushing her hair behind her ear.

"Is it everyone, then?" Jack asked, rubbing his wrist and getting to his feet. Clare watched him as he dressed but her gaze, astonishingly, never left his face.

"Aliens?" she answered. "Yes, as far as I know of."

"An entire town of aliens masquerading as humans," Jack said, putting on his coat. "Huh."

"We call ourselves the Ericius," said Clare. "Well, those of us who aren't completely insane."

"You're saying most of Redwood doesn't know they're not human?"

"I'm saying that sometimes when people get mouthy, they disappear."

Jack hummed, frowning. He put a hand to his ear. "Nim Sudo, didn't disappear, though. She was very obviously murdered. Blaire Falls, too."

"Somebody's trying to make a statement," Ianto said.

"The question is, what?" said Jack.

"Um," Clare said, shifting awkwardly. "I don't mean to rush you, but you really don't want to be here when Victor comes back."

"If he was going to kill you," said Ianto, "Why wouldn't he do it while you were unconscious?"

"I think I can handle him," said Jack. "But I have other things to do. You wouldn't happen to have a car here, would you?"

Every single second of disappointing driving he'd experienced in Redwood was immediately forgiven the second Jack stepped into the garage. Clare, it turned out, drove a black '65 Ford Mustang.

"Hot damn, I can't decide whether to drive it, or suck it off," Jack said, turning to thank her, but when he looked, Clare was gone. She'd left the keys in his hand and the garage door open, though, and that was all the encouragement he needed.

"I still think it could use some blue flashing lights," Ianto said, as they hauled ass toward the station. The weather was pleasant and the skies were, (thankfully,) clear, so Jack drove with the windows down and the gas pedal glued to the floor. He turned the windshield wipers and left turn signal on, because for some reason, it felt inexplicably right.

"Ianto, I wish you could feel this!" Jack shouted, though his voice was drowned out by the wind.

"Can you imagine what it would do to my hair?" Ianto said, and Jack swore he could hear his smirk.

"Seeing you rumpled is like seeing you naked," Jack said, "Except that I see the latter more often."

Jack rolled smoothly into the police station parking lot, looking suave and cool in his fancy new automobile. As he stepped out of the vehicle his coat swished dramatically behind him. Cool theme music played in his head.

"Don't be nervous," said Ianto. "I'm sure the interview will go fine."

Jack grinned and dramatically entered the building.

"So," Jack Harkness said, from across the table. "I need to know, are you a serial killer?"

"Absolutely," said Noel Feathering, who was fixing her hair. "Well okay, no, but that would be pretty badass."

"I love your jacket, by the way," said Jack. "It would have gone nicely with your dress from the other day."

"I reinvent my style every day," Noel said with a shrug. "Most people do. It's called 'changing your clothes.' Not that I mind seeing that coat on you twice."

Jack smiled and leaned toward her, elbows on the table. "Blaire Falls was found dead in his house last night. That dress was found at the scene of the crime. Now tell me, how did your dress get into a dead man's closet?"

Noel giggled. "How did my what? No it didn't, it's on the floor in my bedroom. Somewhere."

Jack reached into one of his pockets, and pulled out a series of photos which he scattered across the table. "Don't lie to me."

"I'm not, I'm really not," Noel giggled some more. "I'm not the only one with that dress, Jack. That's the school uniform. For the girls, I mean, but it really wouldn't surprise me if that were his."

"That's what we get for assuming, Ianto," Jack said with a sigh, leaning back in his chair.

"Thinking about it," said Ianto," Every seventeen year old boy probably has at least one dress hidden in his bedroom."

"Oh? Tell me more," Jack said, smirking.

"Well, it probably helps narrow down your suspects?" Noel said, leaning on her elbow. "Blaire dated Nim in school. I would've said so earlier, but she dated a lotta people in school."

"I knew it. The "N" was for "Nim." Tell me Noel, was there anyone with a "C" name involved with either of them?"

"A few. There was this girl who hung around with both of them for a while, but she didn't go to school much. It was pretty shady, but whatevs." Noel shrugged. "Her name was Clare, but she died in an accident."

"Oh good," said Jack. "Damn it, Ianto, if my new car's a ghost car I'm going to flip a table."

"Er," Noel said, raising her eyebrows at him. "You're… not talking to me, are you?"

"I'm talking to Ianto on my headset," Jack said cheerily, tapping his ear.

Noel tilted her head at him and narrowed her eyes, frowning slightly. "You're… not wearing one? There isn't anything in your ear, Jack."

Jack's hand stopped mid-motion, hovering awkwardly as he stared at her.

"…I have to go," he said, standing up.

"Wait-" Noel said, standing up and reaching after him. "You've left something."

Jack turned, right into Noel's embrace. She stood on her toes to kiss him, and reached around to grab his ass.

"Sorry," she said as she slipped away, but she was grinning. "Would've killed myself if I didn't do that."

"This is why they keep you behind bars," Jack said, grinning back.

Something brushed past Jack's feet as he opened the door to leave. He jumped back in surprise, just avoiding stepping on its tail. A second later, another one joined it. The two white cats swiveled around his feet before slinking off to curl around Noel's boots.

"It's going to be really funny when you die tripping over the foreshadowing cats," said Ianto.

Noel shrugged. Jack shrugged back, and left the room.

Jack skidded to a stop in Victor's driveway, hair windswept, and sporting a new pair of shades. There was no guarantee that ghost girl would be here, as she was supposedly a ghost, but he had no other leads. And with Victor on the run, waiting here was probably his best bet. The coffee had warned him, after all. He really should have trusted it.

Jack held his gun at the ready as he entered the house, prepared for anything, except for what he saw. Everything inside the house was coated in massive, throbbing vines, each of them pulsing red-black and wriggling into cracks in the wood grain. He staggered backward but the door had locked behind him. The vines were all around him, and they were moving.

"Now now, no need to get excited," Jack said, stepping carefully over them. "There's plenty of me to go around."

One of them snapped at him, almost playfully.

"Great," said Ianto, "Now it thinks you're coming on to it."

"You know, I once dated a guy who-"

"Had a lot of tentacles?" Ianto offered.

"…Yes, that," said Jack.

"Now might not be the best time," Ianto said, as another nipped at the bottom of Jack's coat.

"You're right, let's focus on…" Jack paused.

"Getting out of here?"

"Catching the killer," corrected Jack. "This might be a nest, or something. Victor could be here."

"Just don't die, Jack," Ianto said firmly. "We don't know what these things might do if they gang up on you."

"I'm guessing they'll bathe me in acid and slurp up what's left with little straw tongues."

"I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that," said Ianto.

Jack laughed and started up the staircase, moving very slowly. He still didn't know what it was that attracted the creatures, other than water, which was a given. He found himself holding his breath too, just in case. As he made his way down a hallway, he noticed that some of the vines had odd protrusions on them, which got larger the further in he walked.

"Giant monster, this way," Jack whispered, motioning enthusiastically with his free hand.

"Let's hope it's weak to revolvers," said Ianto.

"I'll wrastle it if I have to," said Jack.

"And I'll reserve front row seats."

Jack peeked around a corner, hand over his mouth and holding his breath. Inside was a writhing mass of creatures, all struggling to bite into a vine that was twice the size of any he'd seen before. He decided, actually, to leave them to it.

At the end of the hall was another staircase, and Jack found himself wondering if Victor's house had actually been this big. It hadn't looked like it, but some things were larger from the interior.

"Go back."

Jack paused. Something had sounded like an ominous whisper, but it was hard to tell. The moving walls were disorienting, and the slick sound of them moving over each other seemed deafening with them on all sides.

"Nobody's home, come back later."

Jack twitched, still creeping up the second staircase.

"Get out of here, you doofus, you're going to get eaten."

"Please tell me you hear that, too," Jack said, a hand clasped tightly over his ear. "Hearing voices means you're crazy."

"I assure you, you're perfectly sane," said Ianto.

"Works for me," said Jack. He could hear the creatures scampering behind him, drawn by the sound of his voice.

"You might want to run," said Ianto.

Jack bolted up the stairs and down the upper hallway, but from there, there was nowhere to go, and the vines were still creeping around him. Circling, pulsing, getting closer together. He heard the sound of claws on wood as the "Crickets" bounded up the stairs. Jack started flinging doors open at random. And then in one, he saw a light.

A light from the sky. No, a hole in the roof. He could see that it was a hatch, and down from the hole hung a rope.

There were wide silver eyes staring at him from outside.

"I'll have to pull the rope up when they get here," Clare said, blinking at him patiently. "They'll eat me, too, if they can."

Jack scaled the rope, then sat on the roof in silence for a long moment, just watching her. Clare sat under a large red umbrella, her arms and legs curled up to her chest to keep them out of the rain. She adjusted herself, trying to scoot to make room for Jack, but large as the umbrella was, there wasn't enough space to keep them both dry.

"It's fine," Jack said. "I'm waterproof."

"You make the rain look pretty," Clare said, smiling a little.

"Oh stop that, you're making me blush," said Jack. "Listen, I know this may sound insensitive after you just saved my life, but a friend of mine told me that you were dead."

"Yeah," she said, sighing. "That happens sometimes."

"So… are you?"

Clare shrugged. "I don't think so, but if that's what everyone says, then maybe it's true."

"Do you need a pep talk?" Jack said, with a reassuring smile.

"Nah, I really don't mind." She shrugged. "Most of them are good people, they're just batshit crazy."

"So where do you fit in all this?" asked Jack. "Two of your past lovers are dead, and you're sitting on the roof of the house where the most likely suspect lives. In the rain."

"I always come up here," said Clare. "The Seedlings only come out when it's raining, but everyone else stays outside, so it's the safest place to be."

"But why this house?" pressed Jack. "Isn't there somewhere else where you won't have to hide in the rain?"

"The roots grow into every building," said Clare. "It's not safest here because of that. It's safe because my brother lives here."

Chapter 5: CLEARED

TOTAL Number of Days: 3

TOTAL Enemies Defeated: 19

TOTAL Hot Cars Acquired: 1

TOTAL Number of Continues: 1