I do not own Warm Bodies. It's just awesome.

R and Julie: The Simple Life

(Warning: The first part of this chapter is rated M for gore. Just to be safe.)

Chapter 4: Rage and Serenity

R and Julie were standing near the medical tent, talking to Nora, when the woman was brought in. She was being carried carefully by soldiers who were afraid moving her would kill her. It just might, but they had no option. She was moaning softly, too weak for any other action.

The medical attendants rushed to the woman's aide. They worked very hard to save her life. Julie instinctively moved to the woman's side. The woman was skeletal, her ragged, soiled garments hanging off her. She smelled of sickness and approaching death. At one time, she had been a recovering Corpse. No more. There was no recovering from what had been done to her.

Julie touched her hand carefully. The woman flinched away, then opened her eyes. One bloodshot eye was dead and useless, having been sliced multiple times. The other eye focused weakly on Julie. She clenched Julie's hand and Julie noticed in horror that some fingers were missing, bloody stumps oozing down onto her skin.

"He told me he'd take care of me. I just wanted to feel alive. To be alive," she rasped.

Then, against all the efforts of the medical attendants, she died. Her sallow hand fell limp in Julie's. Julie bowed her head and cried.

There was a monster in their midst. It preyed ruthlessly on optimism and hope. It was a Boney in human flesh. But worse. It was a human with a Boney soul.

During Julie's interaction, R chased down the soldiers and confronted a harrowed-looking Kevin.

"Hey! What's going on?" R demanded, dread forming like ice in his bones.

Kevin avoided R's eyes.

"I'm sorry, that's classified."

R growled a rather coarse expletive he'd learned from Marcus and added, "Come on, Kevin!"

Kevin drew a deep breath and reluctantly pointed at a man being restrained by soldiers several yards away.

"See that guy? He did it. Some neighbors reported strange sounds and bad smells coming from his apartment. We checked it out and found a couple of dead bodies and her. She had been chained up for awhile. Withheld food and water. Tortured. Parts cut up and parts cut off. Parts burned. When we picked her up, metal things . . . fell out of her . .."

Kevin's face blanched and he couldn't continue.

Turning on his heel, R marched over to the man and his guards. The man looked to be unassuming, in his late twenties. Like anyone that might be seen in passing. As R approached, he could hear the guy talking in a calm, even tone to the soldiers.

"Come on, man. She wasn't really a human anyway. Call it a . . . scientific experiment . . . for posterity. Like working on a cadaver in med class."

Reaching the man and his watchmen, R lunged forward and smashed his fist into the man's face with everything he had. R heard a voice screaming and realized it was his.

"How could you do that?! What is wrong with you?!"

The guy hit the ground unconscious, as R was restrained by soldiers. He lunged forward again as they pulled him back. His usually peaceful countenance was twisted into a visage of rage and hate.

"Humans! You're supposed to try to be better! These 'cadavers' just want to be human! They just want to be alive!"

R was fully aware he had lost control of himself and he didn't care. In his mind, he could see himself smashing the monster's head into the ground over and over until his skull crumbled into dust.

"You sick, twisted excuse for a human being! You don't deserve to be a human being! You're a Boney in human form! You're worse!"

The soldiers were struggling with R. He didn't possess superhuman or even weird Corpse strength, but he was in a fury, a rage.

"R! Stop! R!" someone called into his ear.

It was Kevin, yelling at the top of his lungs.

"Stop! You're scaring people! Don't make it worse! R!"

R stopped struggling and was led away from the scene. He was aware people were watching him, wide-eyed and whispering. He didn't care.

Kevin spoke, quieter now.

"We will deal with him. He's a monster. He will answer for his actions. I promise."

R stalked off, still furious. Sick in the pit of his stomach. Normally, he was a peaceful person. The violence that had just taken place threw him back to the darkness of his zombie rage days. If he could, he would have murdered that horrible creature. With no guilt or regrets. People like that didn't deserve to live.

R went home without notifying Julie or anyone else. His stomach churned in rage. He threw up repeatedly into the toilet. He felt sick, felt a terrible, bleak hopelessness. Unable to wreck havoc on anything in the house, he confined himself to a chair in his and Julie's room. He stared at the floor, seeing nothing, feeling nothing but the rage.

Julie found him there later, still sitting. She attempted to scold him for abandoning her until she saw the look in his vacant eyes. She knew what had happened, having been informed by Kevin and several on-lookers. She felt a quiet fear within her and prayed R would return to her soon. She brought him food that he did not eat and water that he did not drink. She stayed near him, busying herself in the room. Quiet. Supportive. There.

Eventually, right before bed, R spoke quietly. It was a single question.

"How can we live in a world where people do that?"

She had no answer for him. He did allow her to touch him, guide him to bed, hold him, until they both fell into uneasy sleep.

A few days later, Julie and Nora were in charge of caring for some children while their adults were working salvage. It was raining. They sheltered in a relatively comfortable building where people routinely gathered to escape unfavorable weather. Julie had requested this work detail of her father in the hopes it would lift R's depression. Colonel Grigio had agreed, secretly proud of R's actions and now concerned for his mental well-being.

Several children were coloring pictures. They lay on their bellies on the floor, various old coloring books spread out before them. A few were humming tunes to themselves. Among them was the pale, blond girl who had gifted a wildflower head wreath to Julie on her wedding day.

Nora was coloring and humming along with them. She often stopped to praise their art and offer encouragement to those struggling to color properly. She believed that coloring was a soothing exercise and helped strengthen their fine motor skills. They colored, chatted, and giggled happily together.

Julie was also on the floor, sitting cross-legged with a child in front of her. This was the dark skinned boy who had gifted the wildflower bouquet to her on her wedding day. He sat, back to her, a copy of the alphabet in front of him. Every so often, he would trace a letter with a small, thin finger.

They played a simple game. Julie would slowly draw a letter with her index finger on his back. The boy would study the alphabet chart and try to guess the letter. When he got it right, she would "erase" the letter and begin a new one. When he got it incorrect, she would "erase" the letter and "write" it again on the palm of his hand.

He got more right than wrong. Julie sweetly encouraged him with high fives and verbal reassurances. His shy smile was proof that the positive message was getting through. The game also provided another significant benefit. Contact. Simple, human contact.

R watched them for a while, from a distance, seated in a chair. His wounded soul battled between rage and serenity.

Rage because these precious children and women could easily be targeted by one of the sick nutjobs society seemed to randomly produce. After the horrible incident with "The Experimenter", it seemed to R that he could see potential evil everywhere he looked. He wanted to destroy any wicked, dangerous people who wished to do harm to these precious souls.

Serenity because the children looked so innocent and free. Growing up in a grim, post-apocalyptic world should have robbed them of their capacity for joy and fun. Yet here they were, coloring pictures and humming. They were even welcoming recovering Corpse children into their midst quicker than any adult R had seen. It gave him hope for the world.

In the end, he tried to reach out for serenity because it soothed the sick feeling in the pit of his stomach. It was hard to put the rage down. It was so much easier to hold on to it, close to his heart. Almost comforting, in fact. But he did try put it down. For himself. For Julie.

The recovering Corpse girl spotted him and left her work, running over to him.

"Billie," she announced quietly, patting her chest.

R patted his own.

"R," he responded.

"Come and play."

She took his large hand in her small one and guided him over to the coloring group.

"R," she offered in her tiny voice to her new friends and pointed at him.

They waved, spoke, grinned, and went back to work. R sat down next to her, feeling a bit out of place among such small, innocent people. Nora looked over and winked at him. He sent her a tentative smile. From her spot, Julie mouthed I love you. He mouthed it back.

Billie offered him a drawing of a sunrise and a randomly plucked crayon from the pile.

"I'm not very good at coloring," R whispered to her.

She smiled happily at him and whispered back conspiratorially.

"It's okay. I can teach you. I'm getting very good."

He looked at the picture. Sunrise. New beginnings. How appropriate. He began coloring. Billie helped.

May you and yours live in safety and peace all your days. =)