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I've been having exams so I couldn't update. Sorry :'( Please, don't be mad.
This is a Chair story only.
Warning: eating disorder
Skinny Love
Blair wanted to stop. She did. But how?
She was so weak, so touched, so abused? She felt so worthless and she didn't even need to look at the mirror to see how awful she looked. She would never be wanted.
But Chuck had been alarmed. He made her eat lots of food and didn't let her run to the restroom afterwards. He wanted her to get better. And she knew it.
But she couldn't not eat. She couldn't purge. Then, what could she do? What was wrong with her? Why couldn't she just feel like any other girl? Because she was Blair Waldorf, and she was never normal. She never really liked dolls like the other girls. She liked animals and bunnies and books. She'd always been smart.
What Chuck didn't know was that everynight, Blair purged. Every fucking night. She could not help it. Bulimia. Pathetic once again.
One day, Blair was in Chuck's room with him making her eat things. Then he wouldn't let her go to the bathroom and removed the lock from there so he'd come in.
They had become friends, and he didn't want her to be his slave. But she was. And he couldn't help but feel a little possessive. If he couldn't have her, she couldn't be with anyone else.
One day, he and his parents were eating.
" So, how is Blair Waldorf behaving?" Lily asked. Chuck shrugged.
" She's very polite and she is really smart, actually." Chuck answered. Serena made finally an interested face.
" Can I meet her? She seems amazing, mom." Serena begged. Lily sighed. That was so Serena of her daughter. She wanted to be friends with everybody she could.
" Whatever. If Chuck allows, you may meet her sometimes." Chuck nodded in aproval. He was tired of Blair being so alone.
" It would be good to her." He told them, surprising Bart, mostly.
" You genuinly care about this girl, don't you, Charles? Bring her to dinner." Bart decided. Chuck was surprised. He thought his dad would be mad or something. But Blair was too sweet to be declined.
" Okay, dad." He agreed, happily. Lily just chuckled.
When the dinner was over, Chuck took his sister's hand and took her to his room, telling her to wait, because he was going to get Blair.
Unfortunately to Blair, he found her purging on the bathroom. This was getting out of hand. Too out of hand. He hugged her from the behind and pushed her away from the toilet.
" What are you doing?" He screamed.
" What do you think?" She asked, between sobs.
" Stop this, Blair, please. You're beautiful. You don't need to do this. This world needs you. I need you." She looked at him.
" You do?"
" I do." He nodded and kissed her lips gently. When they broke apart, they realized what he just did.
" You told me this wouldn't work, Chuck." She reminded him.
" Because I was scared." He saw the hurt on her face. " I really like you." He didn't say he loved her , because it was too soon.
" Me too." She said quietly.
" And guess what? My father and Lily want to meet you. They want you to dinner with us." Blair flinched at the word food. " Unless you don't want." He said with a hint of disappointment.
" I'd love to. But what if I have the need to throw up?" He realized why she was so terrified.
" Then, I'll be there for you." He told her and took her hand. " Come, let's get you cleaned up." She nodded and he gently helped her to wash her face and kissed her lips.
" This means we are, like, together?"
" Only if you want to." She nodded and kissed him once again. " I guess this was a yes?"
" It was a yes." She confirmed. " I just feel so fat. I never want to go away from you. You are my home. You make me feel a bit pretty."
" Pretty? You are perfect. You're Blair Waldorf." She smiled and pushed a lock of hair behind her ear.
" And Bass?" He looked at her. " If you cheat on me, I'll kill you." She informed. He just laughed. He loved her honesty, her smile.
" We should eat something, Blair." She shivered thinking about food.
" Will you hate me if tomorrow I have the need to make myself sick?" She asked, sadly. He just took her hand.
" No, but that doesn't mean you can do it." She chuckled a bit. He leaned and kissed her lips. " Come on, lets eat." She nodded and let him excort her to the kitchen. She sneezed.
" Are you sick?" He asked.
" No, I'm just cold." She gave him a small although fake smile.
" You could sleep with me today." She felt tears up to her eyes. Was it all about sex to him? Was he going to break her heart if she didn't sleep with him?
" I'm not ready, Chuck."
" No, no! Just sleep, really. I wouldn't push you. When you are ready, I'll be too." She nodded, sleepily and took his hand after eating some of the food he cooked.
" I'm full. Can we go now?" She asked. He smiled and lead her to the bedroom and gave her a cute t-shit and shorts to sleep.
" Dress in the bathroom."
" Thank you." She replied, giving him a small peck on the lips. His lips were so soft, warm, welcoming. And they were all hers. No one else's. Just hers.
She closed the door and quickly changed. Then she looked at the toilet and at the mirror. The Blair that looked at her was so much different. So fat. Too fat.
And the toilet was mocking her, teasing. Calling her names secretly. She started crying. She didn't want to do it, but if she didn't, Chuck wouldn't want her anymore and would cheat on her with some whore.
You're not enough for him.
He won't wait forever.
Too fat.
Never enough.
Fat here, fat there, tighs too big, breasts too small.
Ugly. Fat. Ugly. You'd be better of dead. But dead is too good for you. Too simple.
She broke down sobbing.
Meanwhile, he was changing too, when he heard small sniffles. Blair was there for a long time. He should get in. He knocked. " Blair? Are you all right?" He asked, worriedly.
" N-no." He entered immediately and saw Blair on her knees, swinging back and forth, like in trance. He hugged her close.
" What is wrong, Blair?" He inquired, gently.
" You don't want me." She whispered, yet loud enough for Chuck to hear. He swallowed. Blair was a big mess. Her life was so messed up.
" Of course I do. What made you feel that way?" She pointed to the mirror, to herself. He kissed her forehead and put her in his arms.
" I'm so sorry." He told her, lowly.
" Why?" She asked. " It's all my fault. It's all my fault my dad hated me. He beat me, Chuck. Because I was worthless." Chuck clenched his fists in anger. How could a man be so cruel to a beautiful girl like Blair.
" You are anything but worthless." He told her, trying not to be angry at her. She didn't deserve it. It wasn't her fault. He just wanted to make her believe that.
" I'm sorry, Chuck." She said, honestly. He just shook his head in disbelief.
" It isn't your fault. You father didn't deserve you. I don't deserve you. You are the good I need in my life. You are my angel."
" I am?"
" You are." He took her face in his hands and kissed her slowly, passionatly. " You are my heaven."
He realized he didn't need to tell her he loved her, because the words didn't do a thing. He just needed to show it. To be by her side through anything and everything.
And she realized she didn't have to tell him she loved him, because she knew it and she knew that deep down he knew it too. Words were the root of the misunderstandings, aren't they?
Come on Skinny Love, just last year
Put a little salt we were never here...
My my my my my my my my my my my
Staring at the sink of blood and crushed veneer.
The next morning, Blair woke up, her head resting on Chuck's solid chest. She was so warm. And today she was going to dinner with his parents. She was so nervous. She was a slave and they were the kings.
She had met Serena yesterday. She was a nice girl, and she didn't care if Blair was just a slave. They talked about fashion, boys, Chuck. Blair felt like she knew the girl her whole life.
" Serena told me you two are going to meet today." Chuck told her sleepily.
" Only if you agree." Blair replied with a small smile, kissing his lips.
" Only if you kiss me again." He groaned. She giggled and kissed him once again. She felt like a teenager for once. She felt good.
" So, I need to get up!" She whinned. " I need to help the others, and clean your room and your sheets and-" He kissed her once again just to shut her up.
" You are not a slave to me Blair. Let them do it." Blair looked offended.
" I don't like you having slaves..." She said slowly and he looked at her in surprise. She got scared by his look. " I mean, I'm sorry, I just..."
" Hey, it's okay. I'm not mad at you. But I won't get rid of them." She nodded. She couldn't ask him to do that. Not yet, anyways. Perhaps someday he would see as clear as she did. Maybe.
" Well, get up, sleeping Beauty." She laughed. He wrapped his arms around her petite figure and kissed her neck. Then, he put her in the air.
" Put me down, Bass!" She giggled like a little girl. " Now, you like doing this, don't you?"
" Yup." He answered softly, finally putting her in the ground. " I don't want you to do chores today, ok?"
" Why?"
" Because you're too precious. My precious." She pecked his lips once again. She was falling for him everyday. And it scared her to give herself like that to a man. But for Chuck, she'd do it.
She met Serena and the girls talked about everything (almost). Serena talked a lot more than Blair and seemed like a party girl.
" I never went to a party." Blair confessed. " My parents wouldn't let me. I'm a lady."
" Well, you are missing lots of things. Did you ever drink?" The blonde asked. Blair shook her head. " Are you kidding? Not even a glass of whine? And smoking, never?"
" Nope. "
" Oh my Gosh, you're such a saint." Serena laughed. The truth is that Blair had once drank, and it felt kinda good, but her father catched her and beat her, so she wouldn't dare to do it again. She was still scared that Chuck would react the same way. " It only left for you to say you're still a virgin?" Serena giggled, but immediately stopped as she saw the blush on Blair's face. " Geez, you are a virgin. What world do you come from?"
" This world is mad." Blair answered.
" Yes it is, but a good kind of mad. You need to relax, have fun! You aren't the young you are right now forever."
" Obviously." Blair answered, rolling her eyes. Serena just laughed.
" What about you and Chuck? He never pressured you?" Blair shook her head. " That is so not Chuck. He must really like you." Serena stated. " But you slept at his bed yesterday and nothing happened?"
" We just kissed, Serena. He respects me."
" Okay, if you say so."
" Is this amusing you, Serena?" The brunette asked, smirking. Serena just smiled. " I think it's amazing he doesn't treat me like he treats the other sluts."
" Oh, you certainly talk like the jealous girlfriend." Serena mused.
" Oh, whatever, Serena." Blair showed the friend her tongue. Blair never had a best friend, neither boy or girl, because she was too screwed up for that. And her dad wouldn't aloud, would he? Of course not.
" You will do it one day." Serena whispered.
" Do what?"
" Sex."
" I like to call it love-making, but whatever you say." Serena chuckled and Blair grinned.
" Whatever you call it, just be ready. It is amazing."
" No more details, please." Blair pleaded, teasingly.
" Fine." Serena fake annoyance, but it was just faking. She really liked to be with Blair. The girl was so smiling and perfect, Serena wanted to be her best friend. And she was dating Chuck. That was a thing almost anyone could.
" I'm going to the dinner today, too. Don't worry you'll be fine." If only you knew how wrong you are. Blair thought. Serena couldn't know about her eating disorder. Never.
" Who else is going?"
" Nate. He's Chuck's best friend and he comes from a royal family too. He's a bit stupid sometimes, but he's a good person. I used to date him." Blair laughed. Was the anyone in world Serena hadn't dated (but in a good way, because Blair really liked Serena).
" I think I'm falling in love with him."
" With who? NATE?!"
" Geez hell no. Chuck." Blair said, mainly shocked by her friend's phrase.
" I think he loves you too, Blair."
" I'm just not ready to say the words. It's too sudden."
" Don't worry, take your time. The LY words are worth waiting." Blair smiled at Serena's support. " But it will come the day you'll go to bed and say I love you to each other. And then marry and th-"
" No more, Serena!" Blair shouted, blushing in embarassement.
" Seriously, you have the most beautiful love I've ever seen."
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