So this will be the first 5 things America isn't allowed to do. Please excuse any andall grammar errors and mistakes. Enjoy~

1. My Title is the United States of America or just America, and I should not introduce myself to others world leaders as "The United States of Motherfucking America! God fucking bless me!"

"Good evening Prime Minister." America's boss said courteously, shaking the other mans hand and nodding towards the personification of Canada.

"Hello Mr. President, may I ask as to where 'America' is?" He asked looking for aforementioned country.

"Hey! Dudes! It's the United States of Motherfucking America in the house! God fucking bless me!" America yelled busting down the door with a microphone in his hand, his voice ringing loud and clear in the small room. He smiled, his usual trademark grin on his face.

The President shook his head, hanging it in shame while The Prime Minister stood shell-shocked at the loud introduction. Canada only sighed and smiled slightly, having known his brother would do something like this. Bringing up his head and glaring at Alfred, The President grabbed him by the ear. "Excuse me for a second Prime Minister." Ignoring America's exclaims of pain he began to drag him out of the room and closed the door behind him.

The slam of the door brought the Minister out of the shock and he winced as he hard a crash one from behind the door.

"How many times have I told you to introduce yourself properly! This is the sixteenth time you've done this! Need I remind you Russia's boss almost shot you last time because he though you where a freaking burglar!?" You could hear the President yell and a whine followed by a loud whack.

"But booossss! Where's the fun in stiff intros? PLUS! I wouldn't have died either way. AND! Canadians are to soft and mellow to do anything. So what does it matter if it was disrespectful?" America said and yelped once again as a fist came down on his head.

"What was that Al?" Canada asked an innocent yet evil look on his face.

America blanched "Uh...nothing bro.."

"Thought so, now lets begin this meeting, eh?" Canada asked, sweetly smiling when America nodded shakily and re-entered the room.

2. During meetings, when Germany yells STOP! it is not an invitation to yell "Hammer Time!" and start dancing.

"WOULD YOU ALL JUST SIT DOWN AND QUIT ACTING LIKE A COUPLE OF CHILDREN! WE ARE COUNTRIES AND THEREFORE SHOULD ACT AS SUCH! YOU IDIOTS" Germany yelled slamming his hands on the table. "NOW STOP!"

"HAMMER TIME!" America jumped onto the aforementioned table and began dancing. The song soon coming on and Prussia joined in the dance along with S. Korea.

"Aw, yeah~ Motherfuckers~"

3. Asking England if his eyebrows give off WiFi signal will only infuriate him so I shouldn't do that.

America groaned in annoyance and glared at his phone, growling a bit.

"What is it Alfred?" England asked looking over at the frustrated country.

"Why isn't your freaking WiFi working!" He yelled out.

"Excuse me?"

"Yeah! Your WiFi! You know? Don't you're eyebrows give it off?" America looked at England questioningly.

Arthur blinked. Once. Twice. Three times. Puzzlement slowly turning into anger as America's words slowly sunk in. "MY EYEBROWS DO NOT GIVE OFF BLOODY WIFI YOU GIT!" England yelled throwing things at America as he ran out the room.

Alfred laughed and dodged the objects thrown at him and stopped his running when he reached Francis. "Owe me 10 bucks." He grinned triumphantly.

France only grinned and forked over the cash. "A deals fair."

"AMERICA! FROG!" England yelled in the distance running towards the pair.

France looked at America "Run?" He asked.

"Run." America agreed, nodding and bolting off, France next to him with England hot on their heels.

"GET BACK HERE YOU BLOODY GITS!"

4. I will not argue with Prussia on who's 'awesomer' in the middle of a meeting.

"So I was thinking since the trade is going we-"

"I'M AWESOMER!" Prussia yelled cutting off China's sentence. The meeting room fell silent as they stared at the ex-nation his eyes glaring holes into the self-proclaimed hero.

"BULL! Since I'm the hero that automatically makes me awesomer than you!" America exclaimed giving a thumbs up.

"Whateva! Everyone knows that I am ze awesome Prussia!" He yelled standing up and leaning over the unfortunate Canada that was situated between the fighting duo.

"Bruder! We are in the middle of a meeting! Sit down and shut up!" Germany yelled, glaring at his brother.

"Nein! He's insulting me West! No one can be as awesome as me. Right Birdie!" Prussia said wrapping an arm around Canada's shoulders and pulling him close.

"Oh...um..." Canada shifted nervously in his seat trying to curl into himself.

"Hey! Don't bring my brother into this! Besides he knows in way awesomer than you!" America grabbed Canada's right arm and yanked, causing Canada to be pulled out of Prussia's hold and into America's.

"Um, gu-" Canada squeaked as he was lifted away from the pair.

"Don't worry Matvey. I got you, da."Russia smiled down at the Canadian as Russia walked back to his seat, sitting Matthew down on his lap.

"Hey! Let go of my Birdie/brother you damn bastard/commie!" America and Prussia yelled in unison both standing up and glaring daggers at Russia, there previous argument forgotten.

"I'm good." "Why you!" America made to jump over the table at Russia but stopped as a hand jerked him backwards, making him fall.

Prussia smirked down at him but yelped loudly when America's hand shot out and yanked his leg from under him. His face connecting with the table in a loud thud. Several other nations wincing as the sound rang through the room.

"Bruder ar-"

"Hahaha! Serves you right, albino bitch!" Alfred cut off Ludwig, laughing as he got up not noticing the recovering ex-nation. His victory cut short as a body connected with his sending them both down to the floor.

"What now fatass?" Gilbert grinned, pinning down the other.

"Ame-" England tried to call out.

"Oh no you did not just call me that you red-eyed bastard." Alfred glared. "It is on, beyotch." This the fighting continued, Canada, and their previous argument forgotten.

5. I will not initiate a 'German Sparkle Party' in the meeting room when Germany is speaking.

"Now, does anyone have anymore questions?" Germany asked looking over the group of gathered nations. Seeing no hands being raised, except for a few giddy looks he chose to ignore, he began to speak again. "Alright since no qu-"

"Yo dude wait! I got something you'd like!" America yelled jumping up onto the table. The lights dimming as a disco ball appeared and an upbeat song starting to play.

Germany groaned as the familiar tune started playing.

"I like German Sparkle Party

Sparkle Party Sparkle Party

I like German Sparkle Party

Sparkle Party Sparkle Party

Very German Sparkle Party

Sparkle Party Sparkle Party"

America began to dance, Prussia joining soon afterwords along with S. Korea. All of them singing along to the song playing through the speakers.

Germany's eye twitched as Italy joined soon after, the Italian throwing around glitter and shiny confetti.

"German German Sparkle Party

Sparkle Party Sparkle Party

Do you like to Party Party?

Yes I like to Party Party

Do you like to Dancy Dance?

Yes I wore my party Pants."

Germany let his head fall into the table after a few minutes, the meeting room having turned into a rave party. Some of the more adventurous nations missing shirts or in Frances case both shirts and pants.

S. Korea initiating a dance battle between, him, America, Prussia, Denmark and Netherlands. Sweden soon joining in after failing to disregard Denmark's taunting. Each of them having various free styling techniques.

Canada, England, Russia, Romano and Spain partaking in drinking contest. Each of them past their 18th shot or so. All of them obviously drunk by the way they laughed at anything and everything.

"I like German Sparkle Party

Sparkle Party Sparkle Party

Very Hard core German Sparkle Party

Sparkle Party Sparkle Party"

Germany walked out of the room all hope and respect for his fellow nations gone. Maybe he should head home and have a couple of drinks...or a lot.

Yeah, a lot sounds good.

So what do you guys think? Again please do excuse any and all typos and grammar errors. Review please!