Title: Panacea
Author: AoiTsukikage
Rating: NC-17 overall
Characters/Pairing:Law/Sanji
Chapter: 8/?
Word Count: 4198
Summary: There's something in his demeanor, the way he hides his true feelings whenever they start to unconsciously slip out, that speaks volumes. And Sanji would hardly consider himself somebody that wants to fixpeople but, well, he likes a challenge, and Law presents a rather giant one.
Spoilers:For recent-ish chapters, but this is set before Dressrosa.

Chapter Eight

"I thought you said I'd be able to move by tonight. Shit!" Sanji drops down heavily onto a bench in the local tavern, breathing harsh and feeling like he's just run a mile instead of walking across the road.

"I said 'move', I didn't say you'd be back to your normal physical form," Law's leaning back against the wall, still looking tired but certainly more awake than he'd been earlier. "Remember that you did still survive a sword through your body. I'm not a miracle worker, as useful as my ability is in healing injuries that would normally be impossible for the eye to see."

"Yeah, I know," Sanji tries to steady his breathing, looking down to make sure he hasn't started bleeding again, but his shirt is clean and he can tell the bandages are still in place. "It's annoying."

"I'm sure that it is," Law murmurs. "You seem to have remarkable stamina, though, so just bear with it for a few more days and you should more or less be back to normal,"

"Never been good with waiting," Sanji's fingers twitch and he frowns, because Law still hasn't told him where his cigarettes are and he's not in good enough shape to go out and buy some more. "When can I smoke again?"

"Never," Law replies, and Sanji glares at him.

"You're a fucking hypocrite."

"I don't smoke nearly often enough for that," he clicks his tongue. "And if you'd seen the state of your lungs, you'd know why I'm keeping you away from those things…"

Sanji grimaces because the inside of his body is not something he wants to think about, but then he notices the tiny smirk on Law's face and rolls his eyes. "It's not bad, is it?"

"No, for as much as you've smoked, your body's in remarkably good shape," Law sounds vaguely condescending now and Sanji grumbles under his breath. "What was that?"

"I said, I get really pissy when I don't smoke so if you want to deal with that…"

Law's response is to dig the cigarettes and a lighter out of his jeans pocket, passing them over, and Sanji grabs them with obvious relief and lights up as fast as he can, taking a drag and sighing deeply.

"The fact that smoking seems like an orgasmic experience to you is somewhat troubling," Law's looking straight ahead, eyes fixed on some random point across the room, and Sanji leans against his shoulder and blows out some smoke.

"Yeah, well, not like I'm in good enough shape to have an actual orgasm, so I make do," he means it to be a joke but Law tenses up a little. "Hey, I didn't think you were that into sex."

"I'm not, particularly, but it's…enjoyable with you and I…did rather make you a promise that it would be cowardly to go back on now," he's stroking the hilt of his sword, almost like a reflex action, eyes darkening.

"Do you ever let go of that fucking thing?" 'Sanji asks and Law looks surprised that he's gone away from the subject, but well, Sanji's kind of learned that if Law's not willing to talk it's better to just…move on until he is.

"I try not to. Not that I think it would do anything, but, well…"

"Fuck, it's one of those cursed swords, isn't it?" Sanji reaches out without thinking, laying his hand on the saya and feeling a strange energy radiating from underneath. It's not nearly as malicious as the sense he gets from Zoro's sword, but it's still there.

"It is. I don't know much about its origins, truthfully, but its name means 'Demon's Cry' so I can guess," he smirks and Sanji takes his hand away, not wanting to push his luck although Law does seem to have a rather complete mastery over the sword and whatever…demon might be inhabiting it.

Sanji sits back, cigarette still in his mouth, and he can feel Law shift beside him, seemingly ill at ease.

"You're not pressing me."

"About the sex thing?" Sanji asks. "Nah, you'll talk if you want to. I've…you've never…been fucked before, have you?" he has a feeling that's what this is about and Law's cheeks actually redden a little before he clears his throat.

"If I'm being perfectly honest, no. I've…" he waves a hand vaguely and Sanji swallows heavily because, okay, the mental image he gets of Law fingering himself is way too hot. "So I know more or less what to expect. But I consider it the ultimate loss of control and, as I'm sure you know by now, I have…problems letting myself go."

"Yeah," Sanji leans his head on Law's shoulder, nosing against his neck. "Don't worry about it. Whenever you want to, we can do it, and if you don't that's fine."

"But you'd like to."

"That kinda goes without saying," Sanji admits, not bothering to beat around the bush this time. "I'm not going to pressure you, though."

"I appreciate that," Law assures him, reaching to grab his wrist and tugging it slightly.

"What're you doing?"

"We're in the back corner of a seedy bar. It seems a shame not to act in a clichéd manner, doesn't it?" his smile is almost playful and Sanji's not going to pass this chance up, so he drops the cigarette into a cup on the table behind them and swings his leg over Law's knees, pulling the other man up by his collar to kiss him.

Law's arms wrap around his back, holding him in place, and Sanji doesn't bother to stifle the noises he's making because the place is loud and chances are nobody's looking at them anyway. He keeps one hand on Law's collar, moving the other to fist in his hair, and he really wishes this could go farther although he knows Law's right and he can't aggravate his injuries too much.

He hears a slight rumble then, almost like a train moving outside or a…

"Room," Law mutters, breaking away from his mouth long enough to put the sphere up, and Sanji glances up as a lightning bolt bounces off of the shield.

"Nami-san!" he protests, turning to see her standing there with one hand holding her Clima-Tact and the other firmly planted on her hip.

"Not that I'm not appreciating the show, but there are other pirates around and I don't think you want word of this getting out," she doesn't look that angry (although, Sanji thinks, she'd tried to electrocute them so that might not be true) but she does have a point, and as good as kissing Law feels, they do kind of have a room.

"Was that entirely necessary?" Law isn't letting go of him so Sanji stays put, curling up a little in the taller man's lap.

"No, but I know you'd never let anything happen to Sanji-kun and it seemed like the best way to break you two apart," her smile is soft, something Sanji's not that used to seeing from her, and if anything it makes her look even more beautiful. "I'm glad you're feeling better, Sanji-kun," she adds, and he nods.

"I am, Nami-swan. Thank you for your concern!"

"Anyway, just…be careful. I don't want you getting into a fight again while you're still healing," she says sternly and he wiggles a little, unable to contain himself.

"Nami-swan is so kind to worry about me!"

She nods to them and turns around, waving her fingers as a goodbye before making her way to the bar counter, and Sanji slides off of Law with a sigh. "We're never going to get to make out without somebody barging in, are we?"

"Mm, our past record seems to indicate 'no'," he taps his fingers on the back of their booth, seemingly thinking. "But perhaps she has a point in that we should…retire if this is to progress any farther,"

"Can't really go much farther," Sanji put a hand over his abdomen because even that little bit of movement was making it ache, and Law looked marginally guilty. "Hey, I wasn't against that," Sanji points out, and truth be told he's kind of annoyed although, well, with Law working on him he's going to be back to normal much quicker than he would be under other circumstances.

"Still, if you wish to retire, we could…" Law clears his throat and looks to the side as if he's ashamed to say what he wants to, and Sanji nods, even though he's not sure where this is going.

"Yeah. Okay," he tries to stand up and winces, and Law catches his wrist.

"Allow me."

"What are you…woah, shit!" Sanji flails a little even though it's…not helping any, but suddenly he's sitting on the bed in their room and Law's staring at him, looking rather self-satisfied. "How does that even work?"

"Well, I can only teleport within the size of the Room I can create, and if it's through walls I need to be able to visualize the place I'm going so I can swap something out," he explains, and Sanji guesses that it makes sense (and thinks vaguely that Law's ability would be really, really overpowered were it not for the fact that he's limited by his own physical and mental capabilities). As it is, it's still really intimidating, but Sanji truly believes he'll never be on the receiving end of it.

"So, what's your plan?" he asks, curious but also a little apprehensive, and Law sets his sword down and crosses his arms.

"Have you ever had a blowjob?"

And Sanji's pretty sure his brain short-circuits for a moment because holy shit hot, but he shakes his head and tries to think rationally even though his cock's taken a sudden interest in what's possibly going to happen. "No," he says honestly, because it's…well, there's a certain stigma attached to doing that, at least from what he's heard. Mostly that it's something only whores do, but he can't deny that the…idea is appealing. "Why? Are you offering?"

"If you promise to lie back and not move while I do it," Law raises an eyebrow and smirks. "I'm still your doctor, Mr. Blackleg, and I'm hardly going to risk injuring you farther."

Sanji gulps and nods, even though he's not sure if he'll be able to do it, but damn, if it gets him a blowjob he's going to try his hardest.

"Good. Pants off," Law's all-business as usual and Sanji undoes his slacks with hands that are shaking a little bit, shoving them off and lying back against the pillows.

"You've, um, done this before?" he asks, Law matter-of-factly directing his knees apart and crawling between them.

"It's been a while, but I've been told I have an exceptionally talented mouth," he says this rather bitterly and Sanji looks at him.

"I thought you said nobody's ever…"

"Oh, no, it was completely consensual. At the time. But I was…it must have been ten years ago, or close to it, and he was probably around how old I am now. It was the first instance of somebody desiring me for my body and while my life until then hadn't been…kind, I suppose I was still idealistic enough to assume that empty promises were reality," he purses his lips into a thin line then.

"So what happened?"

"He disappeared one day from the island we were both stopped at and I never saw him again. I suppose I was lucky he was an honorable man, if not exactly an honest one," he sighs and Sanji nods in understanding.

"You wouldn't let him…"

"No, at that age I can safely say that I was frightened, but we did…other things, and if nothing else it taught me that physically I'm…" he looks embarrassed at that. "I've never really used it to my advantage because it's not something I'm proud of, but I can admit, as you said, that aesthetically I was dealt a pretty good hand in life."

"That's an understatement," Sanji mutters, beckoning Law closer so that he can kiss him. "Mm. You don't have to…"

"I want to," Law promises. "Trust me, it's not nearly as degrading as all the uncouth pirates claim, and quite frankly, considering the part of your anatomy I'm going to have in my mouth, I think I'd be the one calling the shots," he smirks and Sanji thinks absently that it all comes back to control again, although it does make sense since in his current state he's hardly going to be able to do much more than lie there. "So?"

"Yeah. I mean, shit, I'm not gonna turn you down," Sanji presses their lips together again but Law breaks it off rather quickly, sliding back down Sanji's body and settling himself between the blond's legs. "So what do I…"

"As I said, lie back and don't move. If you wiggle around too much I'm going to stop," Law makes it sound like a threat and Sanji nods quickly, lying his head against the pillow (even though he'd really like to see what Law's doing, it would put too much strain on his neck right now). He can't stop the stuttered gasp that escapes when Law's tongue flicks against the head of his cock, almost experimental but that little touch is enough to make him crave more.

For once, the fact that Law doesn't take his time is a good thing because Sanji's not sure he can handle being teased right now, and when Law's mouth closes around him properly, his brain is a jumble of hot-wet-fuckin shit- that doesn't leave a whole lot of room to worry about anything else.

He can see now why this is a big thing in the brothels, because it feels fucking amazing, although he's never really considered doing it himself but, well, Law seems eager enough so he might have to reconsider that. Law's got one hand wrapped around the base of Sanji's cock, pumping in time with the slide of his mouth, and Sanji forced himself to lie still although his hips give little jerks every time Law pulls back, wanting nothing more than to thrust forward but he knows Law will leave if he does that and, well, he'd kinda be okay if this went on forever.

His hands twitch by his sides, fisting in the covers, and Law pulls back all the way. Sanji whines at the loss of his mouth, a little embarrassed that noise had come from him, and Law kisses the inside of his thigh and murmurs, "you can…my hair, if you need to hang onto something. I don't mind," his voice is a little raspy which only serves to make him sound even more sexual than normal, and Sanji doesn't see any reason to waste the invitation so he clenches his fingers in Law's thick hair, trying to be gentle. Law kind of growls at him, though, and it sounds more like approval than anything so he tightens his grip, getting a low chuckle that sends vibrations straight through his cock and fuck, he's not going to last long at this rate.

It's easier this way, even though he knows Law's still in complete control, and he tries to stay quiet, his breath coming in harsh pants.

Law does this…thing with his tongue then, swallowing and humming low in his throat, and it takes a lot of effort to keep his hips planted on the bed after that one. "Fuck, Law, if you don't…I'm…" he forces out, because he doesn't know why anybody would want that down their throat, but Law shakes his head and sucks harder, if anything, and Sanji thinks absently that at least he tried to say something.

His orgasm, when it hits him, leaves him shaking with the effort of not thrashing around, and he grabs at Law's hair and curls his upper body forward, every muscle tensed before the adrenaline leaves his body in a rush and he flops back against the pillows. "Ow."

Law laughs at that, softly, and Sanji lets his hands fall to the bed as the other man pulls off of his cock and moves up enough that Sanji can see him. "Serves you right."

"I barely moved," Sanji protests, trying to get any hint from Law's expression that he'd been too rough, but while his lips are red and there's a look in his eyes that's a little haunted, it doesn't seem like he's angry about anything. "You okay?"

"Yes. Brought back a few…memories, but I daresay I trust you're not going to abandon me without warning so…" he still looks unsure, though, so Sanji pulls him in for a kiss, tasting something on his tongue that's a little bitter and salty and it should be kind of gross, but it's actually really hot. "Mm, did you like it?"

"Yeah. Fuck. You weren't kidding about your mouth," he wraps his arms around Law's shoulders and nuzzles into his neck. "D'you need…"

"No," Law assures him. "I wanted to do this for you, and I'm probably going to fall asleep before you have the chance to reciprocate in any way," he smiles thinly, looking down to check Sanji's bandages. "But you're not bleeding, so that's a positive sign."

"Mm-hmm," Sanji yawns. "Hey, this time you're the one wearing too much," he pokes Law's shoulder, sitting up enough that he can unbutton his shirt fully and slide it off, and Law shakes his head but gets undressed himself, disappearing into the bathroom for a moment before coming back out with a glass of water.

"As much as I don't mind it, it does tend to leave a rather unpleasant aftertaste," he takes a sip and grimaces. "Not that the water quality in this place is much better but, well," he sets it on the bedside table before crawling under the covers, Sanji lighting up his customary post-coital cigarette and offering it after a moment.

"If you want something to cover up the taste…"

"Yes, tarring up my lungs is a lovely alternative," Law doesn't resist, though, and Sanji's pretty convinced at this point that his jibes at Sanji's smoking habit aren't meant seriously at all.

"I have to say, I didn't expect that from you," Sanji comments, and Law blows out some smoke and looks sideways at him.

"Why? Or do you subscribe to that silly notion that it's something only courtesans are trained to do? Under the right circumstances I'm sure it could be considered degrading and submissive, but…" he passes the smoke back and Sanji takes another drag.

"I mean, yeah, back on the Baratie especially when you heard guys talk about it…" he shrugs. "But then, 's not like any of them were sleeping with each other. I don't think," he frowns, because it's not as if two guys together is necessarily frowned upon in society…he thinks it's pretty common among pirate crews…but a lot of guys probably thought it made them less manly to admit if they were.

"Well, if I don't have a problem with it and you don't have a problem with it, there's nothing to worry about," Law sounds certain and Sanji sees it the same way so, well, no reason to argue. Law slides an arm around his shoulders then, pulling him closer and Sanji shifts a little to get more comfortable. "So. Your conversation with Mr. Tony and Straw-hat earlier…"

Sanji tenses because shit, he'd thought Law had been asleep, and… "H-how much did you hear?"

"Not all of it, but enough to get the general gist. You're a smart man," he trails his fingers lightly down Sanji's arm. "And they have altogether too much faith in me. Although I suspect part of what you were saying was purely logical and not…" he rests his hand on Sanji's chest. "As I said before, emotions are funny things. Although your answer was quite vague before, do you still think I'd turn on you all?"

"Um," Sanji thinks about that for a second, brow furrowed, because yeah, it's something he's said a lot but honestly… "Yeah. I think, if it was the only way that would save one of us, you would. It's happened before with our crew," he notes, thinking about Nami with Arlong and Robin with CP9. "I don't think you'd be serious about it, but I think you'd pretend if you had to."

"You know me too well," Law sounds amused. "And you also know well enough that I can't make any promises, especially where Doflamingo is concerned," he shrugs and Sanji gets that by now.

"Was that…the only thing you heard?" Sanji asks, because somehow he doubts it, and Law sighs.

"No, truthfully. But whether or not you love me…" he clicks his tongue. "Well, it's best you don't. I'm not sure I deserve it, in any case."

"I'm not sure I know how," Sanji replies, thinking about it. "I've always…I guess I've grown up seeking validation and Zeff…he's a damn good man, but he's not winning any 'father of the year' awards, and praise wasn't something I've ever heard. So living on a ship full of men until I was nineteen, women were these…mythical creatures I'd been taught to only show respect to, and that's a big part of the reason I turn into a fool when I'm around them. So to me, love is whenever I feel like I've made somebody happy, and that's a shitty definition of the word because I know it isn't healthy," he's never really laid it out for himself before, not so bluntly, and it makes him sound like a horrible person. "So I switch between seeing women as something reverent and seeing them as something desirable because, hell, I'm a 21-year-old guy and my hormones are out of control anyway. I want people to like me but I don't know how to accept praise gracefully. I'm probably more emotionally fucked-up than you are, all things considered," he laughs, but it's entirely self-deprecating, and shit, who would ever want to be around him when he's got so many bad qualities.

"I'm hardly a woman."

"That's seriously what you're focusing on?" Sanji looks toward Law, who's smiling a little, and he supposes he should be grateful that the other man's giving him an out…but that's not what he needs right now. "And believe me, I know, but people can be attracted to both men and women."

"It's possible," Law shifts his arm so he's holding him more securely again. "As for everything else, from what I've seen, you have plenty of good attributes and your crew loves you despite your negative ones, so I don't think you have any reason to worry," he waves his hand as if he's waving everything off and Sanji has to concede he has a point. "Love, from what I know of it, isn't something that has a formula. It's just…a feeling, and there are different types of it. You love your crewmates, but you wouldn't jump into bed with some of them," he points out, and Sanji nods in agreement. "But that's unimportant. You did say you cared about me."

"Yeah," Sanji isn't sure why Law is pressing this so hard now, but he doesn't want to lie. "I mean, obviously I like your company, and I'd be upset if anything happened to you. But that's not love," he decides firmly, although Law narrows his eyes.

"That's up to you to decide," he finally says, and Sanji feels like he's disappointed the other man somehow. "For the record, my feelings toward you are fairly similar."

"Oh. Good," Sanji decides, closing his eyes and resting his head on Law's shoulder. "So, um, are you saying we should stop pretending this is just physical?"

"I'm saying that it might be more enjoyable for both of us if we do. I refuse to let feelings get in the way of what I must accomplish, but to deny they're there at all when it's just the two of us…as I said, that's more exhausting than giving in to them," he slides his fingers through Sanji's hair and the blond nods.

"We've got a few more days, right?"

"Presumably, yes."

Sanji doesn't answer, dropping his cigarette into a mug on the bedside table and pulling Law in for a kiss, and Law returns it rather enthusiastically, both of them moving slower than normal and it's…nice. Different, because Sanji had always considered men people to fight with and fool around with but never to get emotionally involved with, but both he and Law know it's not forever and if they can separate these few moments from regular life, well, Sanji's rather hedonistic so that's fine by him.

"You need to sleep," Law yawns even as he's saying the words and Sanji grins at him, ignoring his pointed eye-roll as they both settle down for the night.

Sanji isn't really sure they've accomplished much tonight, although he's certainly looking at himself in a new way, but regardless he can't see being comfortable and content as a bad thing so he's going to roll with it for as long as it lasts.

Notes:

1. Blah, I didn't mean for this to get as introspective as it did, but I was reading some interesting posts on tumblr about Sanji having characteristics of Histrionic Personality Disorder, which partially amounts to a constant need to seek validation, placing excessive importance on physical appearance, and being inappropriately sexual in order to get any sort of attention, and that there are thoughts that it could partially stem from traumatic childhood experiences or growing up in an environment where validation was sought but never obtained. So all of that definitely applies, and while I'm pretty sure Oda is writing most of those traits as a running gag, it's kind of interesting to explore and that's…sort of where the last part of the chapter came from.

2. Thanks again for reading and commenting :)