About a month into our relationship I was walking up to my apartment and almost pepper sprayed Bucky. I hadn't expected to see him, leaning up against the wall beside my door. But he was there just the same. I took a moment to catch my breath from the shock before asking, "How did you get here?"

"Nice to see you too," Bucky grinned, "I walked."

As I got a bit closer I noticed small drips of sweat on his face, but the rest of him was dry. Sometimes I forgot how strong he was, walking the twenty blocks from the safehouse to my apartment complex was probably a peaceful stroll to him. "You could have taken a cab," I laughed, "They had those back in the day, right? I'm sure you know how to hail one."

He smirked, "I needed the exercise, I get fidgety just sitting around." His arm extended and he held out a bouquet of flowers in my direction. "I hope you don't mind me dropping by, I just missed you."

"Oh James…" I said examining the lush flowers more closely, "You're too good to me, you know that?"

"Well I was going to get you hologram flowers, you know to be more 'hip' for this day and age, but being from the Paleolithic era I just couldn't bring myself to turn down the real thing."

I planted a kiss on his smug grin and let us both into the apartment.

"I'm going to change," I told him as I moved toward my bedroom, "You're welcome to anything in the kitchen, make yourself comfortable, I'll be out in a sec."

I hurriedly kicked off my shoes and stepped out of my slacks, not wanting to make Bucky sit by himself for too long. I opted for fitted black sweat pants and a plain gray t shirt to replace my work clothes, silently cursing myself for not owning anything more attractive for lounge wear. But my insecurities flew away as soon as I walked into the living room and Bucky's eyes found mine. He always looked at me like I was the prettiest girl he'd ever seen and it gave me butterflies in the best way possible.

I ended up convincing him to stay for dinner, which ended up being takeout Chinese food because Bucky hadn't ever ordered delivery before and was delighted with the idea. And dinner ended up including a movie because Bucky hadn't ever seen Indiana Jones and I had all of them on DVD. And then, because we were both comfortable and didn't want to leave the couch, we opted to watch the second movie in the series. "This is really unrealistic," Bucky said into the top of my head, "These guys are the worst shots I've ever seen, they haven't hit him once and he's standing ten feet away from them. Not to mention he shouldn't have even survived the first movie."

"They're not supposed to be accurate," I say, "The whole point is that he lives, he's the hero of the movie."

"Whatever floats your boat," Bucky laughed, kissing my hair gently.

By the time the credits started to roll by we'd both fallen asleep. I woke up to Bucky whimpering in his sleep, sometime around 1 AM. His body was rigid, breathing labored, eyes pressed tightly shut. Between whimpers he was whispering something in Russian; and while I couldn't make heads or tails of what he was saying I knew he sounded terrified. I was afraid to wake him up because I didn't know if that would scare him more than whatever was going on in his head, so instead I did my best to try to sooth him back to a more restful state.

"It's okay," I said quietly, massaging his shoulder and rubbing his cheek with my thumb. His body jerked at my touch but he stopped whimpering. "It's okay James, you're fine," I repeated, smoothing his hair and kissing his forehead. His eyelids fluttered and I thought for a moment I'd woken him, but he remained asleep. After a few more moments I felt his body relax. I rested my head on his chest, thankful he was beginning to breathe more slowly and evenly. "You're okay," I told him, feeling my own eyelids growing heavy, "I've got you, you're going to be just fine."

In the morning I woke up tucked under Bucky's metal arm. Oddly it wasn't heavy, the pressure of it on my back reminded me of those lead vests they often use for people with anxiety disorders. His body was warm and firm against me, and if I tilted my head up just a bit I could see his sleepy face with a peaceful look plastered on it. I was thankful he'd made it the rest of the night without a nightmare, I felt badly that he'd been so upsetted in his sleep and wondered how often it happened. As safe as I felt curled up next to him, I knew his mind wasn't a safe place for him, and that hurt. I wanted him to feel just as happy as I was.

Just when it seemed like our relationship was at a standstill, Bucky surprised me. It had been two months of flirting, snuggling, kissing, romantic dinners, movies in our pajamas… But we hadn't ever gone further, and I hadn't pushed him for fear I'd lose the bond we'd made...

"I can't believe you liked that!" I tease, musing his hair as I leaned against him on the couch.

"What?" Bucky said, "I can't help it, it was cool." He grinned and kissed me briefly before saying, "But you're much more my type than Princess Leia any day."

"Oh really?" I retort, arching an eyebrow at him.

"Of course," he says. His eyes are darting left to right, analyzing my entirety like they always do. His pupils are a bit dilated and I feel my breath catch in my throat. "Why wouldn't I think that? I mean, for one, you're real," Bucky says, his voice is lower than usual. "And two, you're beautiful, inside and out. You make me feel… complete, Maria." By now his tone is almost guttural and I can tell he's feeling a bit more interested in me than usual.

I feel my cheeks flush and he reaches over and brushes my hair from my face.

"I don't think I'd be stable without you," he almost whispers.

"James…" I breathe, catching his gaze just as his lips crash onto mine. I had been worried we weren't making progress, but now we were moving forward at lightning speed. His hands grasp at my shirt, pulling me so close I can feel his heart beating against my chest. There's a hint of stubble on his cheeks and it grazes my skin as his mouth works its magic over mine.

"Is this okay?" he gasps between kisses.

"Perfect," I sigh, feeling his fingers graze my spine, realizing he's adventured under my shirt.

I'm scared to go too quickly, but I can't help it, and before I can stop myself I'm working my shirt up over my head. His eyes are glowing and he takes a moment to appreciate my figure before slowly tracing the lace on my bra with his fingers. In seconds he has his own shirt off and we're searching each other's bodies for all those little things that make them special. He's got various scars lacing his body from all of his numerous war experiences, but the most striking this is the seam between his flesh and the metal brace of his arm. It almost looks like the two materials have joined together as one, but as my fingers skim over it I can feel where there's a space between them. I'm afraid it's painful so I don't press on it, but Bucky senses my hesitation and whispers, "It doesn't hurt, it's okay," in my ear.

His mouth is trailing down my neck and I've got one hand gripping the back of his neck, fingers grasping at his thick hair, and the other grazing his toned muscled stomach. Bucky's hands are roving around me like he's never felt human flesh before and I'm loving the contrast between the cool metal and the warm skin as they graze every inch of me. "Do you want to…" his voice rumbles in my ear and I know what he's asking. I shimmy my pants off before he can have second thoughts, and then I help him with the fly of his jeans.

"Are you sure?" he asks, panting.

"Yes," I shoot back with as much conviction as I can force into my voice.

He doesn't waste any time after that.

Some how in the next five minutes my underpants go flying across the living room and my bra drops over the back of the couch. At one point we wound up on the floor, though I don't remember having shifted to that position. It occurred to me that Bucky probably hadn't had this much 'physical contact' since before he went to war, and that was being proven by how hungrily he was taking in all of my body. "Can I…" he rumbles into my ear, singling he's ready. I nod, knowing full well that I'm getting to that point as well. He's ever so careful as he makes his entrance, pausing momentarily to make sure I'm still on-board. Once he's inside it doesn't take that long and I'm holding in the urge to yell his name as loud as I can. We separate, his arms entangling my body as he lays next to me, completely exhausted.

"James… That was…" I pant heavily, "Excellent."

"Not bad for a guy in his nineties, huh?" he has that stupid smirk on his face again when I roll over to look at him.

"Not bad at all, James, not -"

He cuts me off with a curt kiss. "Bucky," he grins, "You can call me Bucky."