:)
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It had been a thought tugging at her.
She'd noticed the way it had stopped bugging her as much when Klaus would disappear only to return a few hours later, the smell of fresh blood still on his lips. She had taken it for acceptance – that's who he was, that's who he would always be. If it did cross her mind that perhaps she wasn't as disgusted at the idea of feeding from a human as she once was, she'd push it away, bury it, smother it, and be sure to frown a little more at Klaus next time. She didn't miss the way she'd linger on the scent of a human's blood, the consequent dull pain of her fangs longing to come out and play, the temptation to have a taste, but she'd chalk the thoughts up as simply not having enough blood that morning, and started drinking an extra bag for breakfast. She'd try to ignore it, the temptations. Study the humans closely. See the smiles they'd wear, remember that she was human once too, and not that long ago. She'd bite her cheek and never think it was someone else's blood she'd rather have flooding her mouth.
If it was the smell of blood that made her lose control it was the taste that brought her back. Warm, pumping with life. So much more intimate that way…
Caroline's eyes fly open and she shoves the maid away from her. The girl falls on the ground with a whimper, cradling her wrist. Klaus frowns.
Caroline looks wildly around the room, eyes darting between the bleeding maid and Klaus, who sits up in bed, standing. He takes a step toward her and she flees from the room, retreating to her own bedroom and slamming the door closed. She starts panting in an attempt to expel the smell of the maid's blood from her nose. Outside her bedroom window, she notices a pigeon sitting on the windowsill and Caroline clears the space in a moment, slamming the window open and snatching the bird just as it rises to take flight. She plunges her fangs into the things chest, draining it in a moment, the taste of its blood so weak compared to the maid's. But it helps the burning in her throat and clears her head. Her blood would be so much better, you know…
She tears at her hair as she storms into her bathroom, turning the sink on and splashing herself with the cold water. Blood is smeared across her chin, a mixture of the human's and the bird's. Caroline scrubs it away even as the temptation to lick it off rises, to get one more taste of it…
Caroline braces herself against the counter and hangs her head, the sink still running. She clenches her jaw and breathes in and out, having escaped the smell of the girl.
"Caroline," Klaus stands in the doorway to the bathroom, blood still smeared across his mouth. He watches her carefully.
She looks up at him, rage pouring from her suddenly. He doesn't flinch at her stare, rather licking his lips as though impatient. "You tempted me," Caroline bites out, accusation clear in her voice.
"No, love, I simply tested you," he says, crossing his arms over his chest.
"Is there a difference?" She scoffs, straightening. Caroline gives herself one last withering look in the mirror and slams the sink off before turning to him, mirroring his pose.
"By saying I tempted you, you are implying that I wanted you to drink from her," Klaus says. "When I say I was testing you, I mean I was giving you the choice. It made no difference to me if you decided to give in or not." But something in his eyes dances, as though he couldn't be more pleased with her choice.
"You're full of shit," Caroline snaps, taking a step toward him. She points a finger at him and jabs him in the chest with it. "You knew I was going to come to your room after I woke up because we're out of blood. You knew I had too much to drink last night and was going to be starving. You didn't even warn me that you had her in there!" She jabs him three times, each for every point. His look of amusement at the action quickly darkens until he's glowering back at her.
"And what do I have to gain by having you drink from a human, Caroline?" Klaus's tone is dangerous but she doesn't even entertain the notion to back down.
"Because it's all part of some stupid point you're trying to make," she says. Caroline cocks her head to the side and looks him up and down. "You remember London, I'm sure? What was it you said? You're sick of seeing vampires making friends with humans because they don't deserve our mercy, wasn't it?" Caroline takes one step closer to him, head thrown back to glare directly into his eyes. "You were so hell bent on it, but why bring it up again now?" Her eyes search his face. "What is it, some kind of punishment?" Klaus stares back at her coolly, offering no reply. Realization hits her then, her eyes widening. "I get it," She starts. Klaus closes his eyes, as though hearing those words from her mouth again, said with that exact tone as it did so many years ago, pains him. "You're mad at me, about last night."
His eyes fly open. "Caroline…" He warns, narrowing his eyebrows at her.
"No," Caroline snaps. "So what, Klaus, I don't kiss you and you throw a bleeding human in my face for revenge?" She jabs him one more time in the chest. "That's low, even for you."
Klaus grabs her by her wrist, jerking her against him. "Sweetheart," he begins, voice low and malicious. "You'll do well to remember who I am and what I can do before you behave in such a way." But these words don't scare Caroline, they only enrage her further. She opens her mouth to berate him but he cuts her off. "No, I think it's my turn to talk. Don't put the blame for what happened in there on me, because we both know that in the end it was you who gave in. Your self-control has always been remarkable, Caroline, and if you truly did not want to drink from that girl you wouldn't have." Klaus cocks his head to the side. "I saw it, the moment of resignation. Something clicked for you, didn't it, sweetheart? Something made it acceptable for you."
"Shut up!" She snaps, jerking away from him. It's useless, though, his grip too strong.
"That's not going to work anymore, Caroline," Klaus says gruffly. "You can't keep denying it, not to me, not to yourself. You may have to play human-loving vampire for Elena and your mother, but not for me." His voice is softer now and his grip loosens. She takes a step away from him, looking up at him with her mouth open.
"It's not…" Words are failing her. Caroline shakes her head from side to side. "I…I'm not…" It's all falling down around her now, because he's right; she only has herself to blame. It isn't Klaus she's angry with, it's herself. Sure, he may have done it all to get back at her. It may be his fault that it happened. But she let herself fall into it, let herself give in to those thoughts that she had tried to bury deep within her. The fear that she'd end up like Klaus one day, the resignation she made to herself, that she wouldn't allow it to happen, not ever. But it's starting to crack, that promise, because it's a reality that's starting to become more and more likely. Something that every vampire must battle with as they age. The contempt for humans grows as decades pass; it's easier that way, it has to be easier that way. She thinks of her mother and Bonnie and Matt. When they pass, what ties does Caroline have to humanity, other than fading and fleeting memories as a mortal? She's thought of the pain she's going to have to live with the rest of her life, surviving on after they all pass, their short years the number she was supposed to live. Why would she expose herself to that again? What's to be gained in befriending humans when she knows they're going to die while she will live over a hundred life times? Why feel that pain again?
It's simpler to put the blinders on and take them for what they inherently are. Natural prey. Something to be hunted.
But she can't think like that, not yet. She's still so young. She still has her ties to humanity. She doesn't play human-loving vampire, though; that's where Klaus is wrong. It isn't an act. It's simply a role she may be growing out of, little by little.
Tears prick in her eyes and she looks away from Klaus. He wraps his arms around her and she lets him, crying into his shoulder while he pets her hair and whispers words of comfort to her. Caroline wants to be disgusted by him, wants to hate him now more than ever, but she had at least learned that others can't be blamed for her mistakes. And while Klaus was fuel to a fire, in the end, she was the one who gave in. While he might have tempted her, Klaus never robbed her of her free will. And for that reason she cries, because Caroline has not only failed herself, but her mother, and Bonnie, and Elena.
They move on from Tokyo, the time there leaving a bad taste in both of their mouths. Klaus takes her to Rome as if he knows their time together is ending, determined to show her the third and final city he promised.
Caroline doesn't try to put up a strong front as she did after Cairo. She becomes more and more distant, her heart no longer in it. She still follows Klaus around as he points out landmarks, shares with her history and beauty she can't appreciate this time around. His impatience grows as he watches her eyes glaze over, as she shies away from his touches like before. They're in Rome for a week before Caroline finally decides it's time for her to leave Klaus.
They're having dinner at a high class restaurant, the patrons dressed sophisticatedly while waiters and waitresses dote on them, eager to please. Klaus and Caroline sit outside on a dimly lit patio, the night cool and clear. A quartet is positioned at the back, expertly playing softly while a few couples sway to the music, holding each other close, whispering sweetly into the others ear.
Thoughts swim in her head, fleeting, ever changing. Samira's voice rings out, however. Urging Caroline to get away while she still can, to find her freedom. Caroline realizes her warnings might not have been enough, originally. She would have kept putting it off, fear and insecurity keeping her from ever leaving Klaus's side. But Tokyo had set it off. Leaving Klaus had become crucial if it meant keeping her humanity for just a little while longer.
Klaus has noticed Caroline's far off look and says nothing, sipping tentatively from his wine. He's been in a bad mood all day, not bothering to take Caroline out, keeping himself holed up in his room. It had been her idea to go out for dinner. Maybe she wanted one last evening out with Klaus. Maybe guilt had taken root inside of her.
Because in the end, maybe Klaus only wanted her to be safe, and safety was something he could give her.
"Let's dance," Caroline says suddenly, eyes frantically flying to Klaus. He doesn't miss the desperate look in them, the almost panic in her voice.
"If you insist." He stands, offering her his hand. She takes it quickly, rising and almost dragging him to the dance floor. He spins her back to him, reminding her who is in charge, and she clasps her body against his, clutching his right hand and resting her hand on his shoulder. His hand moves to the small of her back and he draws her closer.
She doesn't fight it. They sway gently to the music, Klaus leading her every step. Caroline allows the thoughts to flood her. She knew what she would be getting into with Klaus, surely she knew. Klaus had never been shy about who he was. Demanding, possessive, violent, defensive. Caroline would be a fool to think he'd ever change, least of all for her, but of course she didn't expect him to. The realization that she could love Klaus strikes her with another fear; maybe it's her, then, who's changing? Becoming dependent on him, as he so wants others to be. Numbing her to the horrors of feeding from humans. She has to get away, to breath without him constantly over her shoulder. Try on independence, become who she is meant to be for eternity.
"Caroline?" Klaus questions.
"Sorry," Caroline looks up at him now, flashing a grin. And the concerned look he's giving her hits her hard and she's left feeling guilty. He cares for her, genuinely cares, and shes' going to leave him, all because she's going through some personal crises. He scares her, of course, and she berates herself because he doesn't deserve her pity, of course he doesn't, because he'd never understand why she has to leave, never let her go freely. Maybe, in some twisted way, he'd always just been doing what he thought was best, doing what he thought was necessary to keep him and his family safe. And the thought saddens her because no wonder he wouldn't get it. Everything he'd done, every place he'd taken her, it was all because he honestly wished to show her the world as he had said he wanted to so long ago. He was only trying to get her away from the painful memories of Mystic Falls, offering her protection from any threats like the final one she faced in her hometown. And they clashed because he was so old and she still so young, their mindsets so distant from one another that of course they'd never see eye-to-eye on everything, at least not for a long, long time. But that's why she has to leave, isn't it? Because it would never work between the two of them. There was too much to be forgiven, too much to have to work through. Even if Klaus thought she was something special and she found herself falling for him, it was all too much.
The thought brings tears to her eyes and she does know why but she can't admit to it.
"Are you alright?" Klaus asks gently.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Promise," Caroline smiles but she's sure it doesn't reach her eyes. "I'm just a little tired is all."
"We can go back if you'd like," he says, hesitating.
"No, it's still early!" Caroline lets go of him, her hand slowly sliding off his shoulder. "I think I'll go in and order a cup of coffee though, maybe go touch up my make-up; would you like anything?" Her heart is racing and she's sure Klaus hears it.
Klaus looks back at her for a long moment. His brow knits, a frown tugging at his mouth. "No, I'm alright," he finally says. They leave the dance floor, Klaus returning to their table. He watches her walk into the restaurant, his grip tight on his wine glass.
Caroline looks over her shoulder at him before opening the door. She gives him a smile and he doesn't react, taking a sip from his glass and then looking away. She bows her head as she enters the restaurant, heading for the exit.
She takes off in a full sprint back to the hotel. When she arrives she immediately starts gathering all of her things, shoving them unceremoniously into her bag. She changes out of her evening dress into a pair of jeans, mind racing as she thinks of a way to leave the city. She figures she only has a few more minutes before Klaus realizes she isn't coming back and is just zipping up her suitcase when she senses his presence.
"Going somewhere, sweetheart?" Klaus's tone drips with rage, threats looming in his voice.
Caroline stands very still, spine snapping up straight, feet standing slightly apart. A solid stance. A defensive stance. She crosses her arms over her chest, shutting him out, creating a wall. She turns slowly, taking a deep breath, and faces Klaus. The light from the hall casts him in shadow, his form but a silhouette. She doesn't miss his hunched shoulders, the way his head is cocked to the side, or his hands, balled into fists in front of him.
"Klaus," she breathes, dread finally flooding her. Stupid, stupid, stupid, she recites to herself. Caroline should have just left everything behind and ran. Ran far and fast without a backwards glance.
"Now, the old 'I have to powder my nose' excuse is a classic, really, Caroline. I must compliment you on that," Klaus takes a step toward her. "In one thousand years, I never thought it'd be used on me, though, much less by you."
"Klaus," Caroline takes a step back for every step he takes. "Please, don't-"
"Don't what, Caroline?" He snaps. "Don't be angry? Love, I'm passed angry. I'm hurt." He stops, considering this. "Which, one would argue, is much worse."
"Klaus, I'm sorry!" Caroline pleads. He's backing her into a corner and she looks around wildly for an escape. "But, I-"
"But what, Caroline?!" Klaus yells now, lunging at her. He has her pinned to the wall, holding her by her upper arms. "Were you just going to leave without a word? After all that I've done for you? Just sneak out while I waited for you to return like a fool?" He spits it out. Caroline winces away from him.
"I can't stay with you anymore!" Caroline says, mind racing. Maybe if she explains it all, maybe he'll understand. Maybe he'll actually let her leave, a hope that is slipping away. "I just…I have to go, Klaus!"
"Please, darling, enlighten me," He pushes her further against the wall, pressing himself against her. "You've been distant since Cairo. What poisonous thoughts did Samira fill your pretty, little head with?" Klaus cocks his head to the side. "Please don't tell me this has to do with that little incident in Tokyo."
Caroline is suddenly seized with anger because it's just like him to push something like that, something so important like the event in Tokyo, aside. To shake his head as though Caroline is ridiculous for dwelling on it. And it's not like she owes him an explanation, anyway. How dare he think he can push her around like this, as if a little screaming and manhandling will force her into submission? She isn't one of his little hybrids and he isn't her alpha. This whole escapade was her idea, after all. She had decided to leave Mystic Falls and he had asked permission to accompany her.
"So what?!" Caroline suddenly snaps back with equal ferocity. "Are you going to make me stay with you, Klaus? I hate to break it to you, but your whole alpha-male sire-bond doesn't work on me and, last I checked, stabbing me with a dagger and locking me up in a box for centuries isn't an option for you," Caroline glares at him. "So what are you going to do, Klaus?" She challenges.
And suddenly a grin has plastered itself on Klaus's face and Caroline's brain kicks back into action because she knows what he's going to do.
"I find compulsion to be very helpful, love."
Caroline squeezes her eyes closed, turning her face from him in an instant. Klaus frees her arms but presses himself further against her, pinning her in place. He takes her face in both of his now free hands, turning her head to face him. For a moment Caroline's afraid he'll snap her neck with how much they struggle against one another. "Caroline," He says harshly, commandingly. She jerks her head side to side, clawing at his chest, trying to push him off of her. It's useless, her blows as weak as a child's against him. "Caroline," Klaus says again and she bites down on her lip, willing the tears that are building to stop.
She saw this coming, of course. It was a fear that had nestled in her the first time she even entertained the idea of leaving. Klaus wouldn't let her go. Of course he wouldn't. He had spent the past ten years trying to catch her eye, to give in to him. And of course the moment she did, he would be damned if he'd let her go before he had taken from her all he wanted. She was a fool to even hold on to the slim chance that he was better than that, that her free will was something he valued. You don't connect with people because you don't even try to understand them. Those words had been true when she had first said them, years ago. And Caroline, like an idiot, thought that maybe he had outgrown them, that maybe he had changed. Thank you for your honesty. Surely Klaus had taken her words to heart. Surely she had helped him, in that way.
Surely she was an idiot.
"Please," She whines as the first tear falls. "Klaus, please."
And suddenly his mouth is on hers. Caroline freezes, her hands halting their assault on his chest. Klaus's hands move to her hair, running his fingers through it. One traces leisurely down her neck, cupping her jaw for a moment before tracing down her spine, nestling on the small of her back. He draws her closer against him and Caroline gives in. Her hands travel to his shoulders, hesitantly gliding over his chest. She links her hands at the base of his neck, fingering the locks of hair there. Their mouths search the others hungrily, their tongues crashing together, their kiss deepening and deepening as though they're trying to meld into one.
Klaus bites down on her lower lip and Caroline gasps, eyes flying open. And just as suddenly his mouth is gone and Caroline's left kissing the air for a moment before their eyes meet and she's locked in the compulsion.
The tears start flowing again and Caroline's brow knits, nostrils flaring as she takes a deep breath. Her mouth twists as she tries to form words, words to plead with him, to beg if she has to. She manages to let out a sob, his name lost somewhere in her voice, filled with despair.
And Klaus closes his eyes and steps away from her. He turns, takes another step, and stops.
Caroline lets out a shaky breath, eyes widening in shock. "You're not…" She trails off, brow knitting.
"If you're not gone by the time I return, I may change my mind," Klaus whispers and then he's gone, any sign of his presence fading with the bruises on her arms, the tingling on her lips.
xx
-Reels