I'm so sorry this took forever. It was a pain in the ass to write for whatever reason and I really miss having Klaus because his actions are usually what propel me forward and bleh. So rest assured he'll be back soon if not for my writing's sake. Heh.
Also, if any of you are interested, I have been nominated in two categories for the Klaroline Awards on tumblr! I have been nominated for Best Underrated Fic for The Devil and White and also Best Klaus Author! You can vote at .com, just click the 'Vote Here' button at the top of the page, so if you think I deserve it, please do! Voting ends the 25th and you can vote every day until then!
Anyway, I'm sure you're impatient for me to get on with it so, here you are! Chapter 10!
xx
Caroline taps her foot impatiently, suitcase in one hand and her phone in the other, checking the time. Stefan had promised to pick her up from the airport thirty minutes ago and has yet to show up. Caroline didn't mind waiting, really; being immortal gave her a lot of patience she used to lack, but she was anxious to see Stefan. Anxious and a little fearful. She wasn't ready to be grilled by Stefan, even though she was sure he wouldn't be any worse than Bonnie.
She had stayed with Bonnie for two nights, the pair catching up in the time and departing with a promise to keep in touch. Bonnie would be leaving for Florida soon to meet up with her boyfriend, the two planning to depart for Europe in the coming weeks to seek out more of her bloodline, if there were any. As they bid goodbye to one another, Bonnie had grasped Caroline's hand and gave her a soft look.
"Just…" she began, knitting her brow. "Just do what makes you happy, Caroline."
Caroline offered a small, sad smile and embraced her friend before turning to board her flight set for San Francisco.
That was where she was now, alone in the airport terminal. The place was busy, the humans passing by her tempting her, unaware. Caroline hasn't eaten in a few hours and has grown hungry again. She hopes Stefan shows up soon.
It's a God send when his face emerges from the crowd, looking young as ever. A smile touches Stefan's face when their eyes meet and he hastily approaches her, taking her into a hug. Caroline lets out a little laugh, unable to help herself.
"It's so good to see you, Stefan," she says, returning his embrace.
"Glad to see you're still in one piece," he jokes, letting her go to take a look at her.
Caroline rolls her eyes at this, but a smile spreads across her face. "Yes, I'm perfectly fine, thank you. Can we get out of here? I'm starving."
Stefan leads the way to his little red Porsche, carrying Caroline's bag for her like the gentleman he is. The traffic is hectic and terrible, the reason for Stefan's tardiness as he explains. It takes them about forty minutes to get to the hotel Stefan is accommodating, an expensive, historical building with a great view of the city. He has rented a suite with two bedrooms for Caroline's stay and takes her few possessions to her room, presenting it to her with a great flourish. She gasps in awe, humoring him.
"Better than Bonnie's living room, that's for sure." Caroline sighs as she falls onto the queen sized bed, stretching out her arms and legs. "I miss my bed," she whines. "I'm so tired of hotels."
"How's Bonnie?" Stefan asks politely, sitting at the foot of the bed.
"Fine. Busy," Caroline frowns. "Old." She sighs. "When's the last time you saw her?" She asks, rolling over to look at Stefan.
Stefan looks off for a minute. "Probably two, three years?"
Caroline nods. "What about Damon?" She hesitates, chewing the inside of her cheek. "Elena?"
Stefan presses his mouth into a hard line, frowning. "I haven't seen Damon in almost a year. Elena went off to join him a few months ago."
"Where are they?" Caroline inquires after a moment and Stefan shrugs in response. She decides to change the subject, his annoyance evident. "I can't believe we've all grown so distant," she muses, sitting up again and inching to the edge of the bed, next to Stefan.
Stefan shrugs again. "It happens. It's easy for our kind to split apart then reunite again, years later, nothing changed."
"Well I don't like it." Caroline smiles and takes one of Stefan's hands. "I mean, I don't care about Damon, but you, mister, have some things to answer for," she teases and he smiles, to her relief.
"Elena wanted to travel," he says by way of explanation.
"Yeah, well, is a visit at Christmas too much to ask?" Caroline raises an eyebrow and Stefan chuckles.
He returns the hold on her hand and looks at her very seriously then. "Well, I'm sorry, Caroline. Genuinely." Stefan smiles and his eyes go all soft like they do and Caroline can't stay angry at him for a moment.
"Well, good," she replies, returning the smile.
"But I think we're missing the important topic at hand, Caroline." He's serious again, his tone authoritative.
"Oh, yeah, you're right. Where's that blood bag you promised?" Caroline's avoiding the subject, of course, positive about what, or rather who, Stefan wants to talk about. He raises his eyebrow and she relents, sighing. "Ok, Stefan, I promise I will explain everything, but can we not talk about him right now? We're having a heartfelt reunion after, what, four, five years? Can't we just have a little fun first?" Caroline's eyes are pleading and Stefan senses something else there, some kind of pain, and he begrudgingly nods. Caroline flashes a brilliant smile and throws her arms around him. "Thank you, Stefan."
"Just know you're in for it later," Stefan jokingly warns. "Now let's get you fed."
The two spend the rest of the day lounging around the hotel, catching up over bags of blood. Stefan had been drinking human blood in moderation for the past few years, Caroline there to keep him in check at the beginning. He was practically under control by now, his ripper side not rearing its ugly head since Klaus had set him off so long ago now, it seemed.
Stefan seems happy on the whole, if not a little lonely. He still loves Elena; always will, as far as Caroline can tell. Elena is still as indecisive as ever, fleeing to the arms of one brother should the other ever do wrong. Stefan seemed to accept the fact that a part of her would always love Damon as well. The doppelganger's lovingness was her greatest strength, yet proved to be her downfall more often than not. Caroline struggles to find words to comfort Stefan, unable to fault Elena for who she ultimately is.
They had moved on from blood to alcohol, Stefan throwing back his third glass of whiskey with a sigh. "I'm being a downer, aren't I?" He asks, smiling.
Caroline shakes her head, but laughs loudly when Stefan raises his eyebrow at this, warm and giggly from the alcohol. She nods her head, still smiling. "You are, but it's okay."
"No, no," Stefan shakes his head, pouring himself another glass. "You wanted to have fun, and here we are, you watching me drown my sorrows."
"It's a nice change of pace, honestly," Caroline says, laughing. Stefan starts at this, but she shakes her head firmly. "Nope, nope, not yet. You'll get all the gory details, don't worry. But you were saying something about fun." Caroline smirks, quirking her eyebrow. "I need to blow off some steam, personally, and I think you do too."
"You know me so well, Caroline." Stefan shakes his glass at her. "What do you want to do?"
"No, no, that's all for you to decide. You are my tour guide in this strange and foreign land." She says the words and immediately regrets them, unable to ignore the rock that suddenly settles in her stomach. "Or…whatever. What's there to do in San Francisco? Not a lot, I imagine," she jokes, shoving away any thoughts of him.
Stefan smiles at this. "Why don't you go get changed and I can show you around. Grab some dinner, go to a bar. How does that sound?"
Caroline smiles back at him. "Couldn't think of any better way to spend the evening." She stands, stretching, and begins walking back to her temporary room. Before closing the door to change, she hesitates and turns back to Stefan, who looks up at her expectantly. "Thank you again, Stefan." When he looks confused she adds, "For not prying."
"Of course, Caroline."
She decides to go all out, fixing her hair and makeup before donning a slim fitting red dress, a gift from…
She changes into a blue blouse and a short black skirt, both purchased by herself, making a note to sort through her clothes. She frowns at the red dress for a moment before leaving her room. "Try this on," he had said, handing the dress to her waiting hand as she stood in the dressing room of some gaudy boutique in Prague. "It'll look wonderful, I'm sure." And he had been right. Of course.
Maybe she'd just burn it.
As Caroline closes the door to her room, Stefan stands up from the couch he had been occupying, turning off the sitcom he had been watching with mild amusement. He's dressed in a red button up and dark blue jeans that still look new and stiff. Good thing she changed, she thinks. She wouldn't have wanted to match Stefan.
Right, Forbes, keep telling yourself that.
"How do you feel about Italian?" He asks, leading the way to the door. Stefan holds the door open for her as she walks out, turning to lock it. "There's a really good place that's just at the end of the block."
"Whatever is fine," Caroline says kindly. She wonders how it will compare, her tastes a bit more worldly than they used to be. Pizza had, unfortunately, already been ruined.
She wishes she could stop thinking about everything. Him, the places he took her, the things he bought her. It was almost as though she…
Don't you even think about it.
The line for the restaurant is out the door, couples standing together looking irritated and impatient. Stefan suggests they go somewhere else, but Caroline doesn't mind the wait. Eventually they're seated at a table for two outside on a stylish patio, with candles burning and stringed lights hanging across the ceiling. The setting in some ways reminds Caroline of the restaurant she and Klaus had gone to the night she had tried to make her escape. She's thankful for the bottle of wine Stefan orders.
Caroline's frowning into her third glass of wine, their meals finished, when Stefan finally says something.
"What's wrong?" Caroline looks up, realizing she had been blanking out, and shrugs while smiling sheepishly.
"Just thinking." She purses her lips and sighs. "Remembering."
"Anything to do with…?" Stefan hesitates.
"Yeah. Can't seem to get him out of my head, unfortunately." Caroline sets her glass down and looks at Stefan seriously. "Is it terrible that I might not actually, uh…hate Klaus?"
Stefan looks off for a moment, thoughtful. "Well, look at it this way. I was best friends with the guy for a short period of time, loved his sister even."
"Yeah, but that's when you were…different." Caroline looks away. "Do you hate him now?"
Stefan thinks this question over for a while again and then sighs. "He's done a lot of terrible things, Caroline. "
"I know," she says, biting down on her lip. "But…haven't we all? We've all used people. Hurt people. Killed." She hesitates. "What makes us so different?"
They both mull over this question for a while. Caroline can, of course, pick out major details that set Klaus apart from them. He was ruthless in getting what he wanted, unremorseful about the people who had to die along the way. Collateral damage, he would have called it. Just like she was, once, a lifetime ago, when she still feared him, still despised him. How had those feelings gone away? Maybe she just grew to understand him. Klaus, ultimately, doesn't want to be alone. As much as he prided himself in his uniqueness, his incredible power, he also despised it, being the only one of his kind. Caroline will never know what it's like, to be wholly alone in such a way.
She pushes the guilt away, knowing that she left him alone. Proved to him that, yet again, he was going to be abandoned.
"I don't hate Klaus," Stefan says finally, pulling Caroline from her thoughts. "I should, and maybe you should too, but I don't. You're right." Stefan takes a swig of wine from his glass, letting out a long sigh after he swallows. "We've all hurt people." The weight of the words settles over him and Caroline can only imagine what he's remembering. She places a hand over his and smiles when he looks up at her.
"But we can be forgiven," she reminds him.
"So, then, is that it?" Stefan asks. "Do you forgive him?"
She turns the question over in her head a few times. "No, I don't. But, one day, I think I could."
"Why'd you leave him, then?" He asks and Caroline knows it's finally time to come clean with him.
She takes a deep breath and releases it slowly. "You said you were best friends with him." Stefan nods. "And I said that's because, back then, you weren't who you are now. You were a ripper." Caroline stops.
"What is it, Caroline?" Stefan questions gently.
"I was changing, Stefan. He was changing me." She then lets out a huff. "I guess that's not entirely fair to say, but being with him, it's like…something was set off. I became more…vampire." Stefan gives her a questioning look. "Like, I'd look at humans and get a hunger I haven't had for years, not since I was turned. I thought I had it under control. But Klaus brought it back out again." Caroline frowns, looking away from Stefan. "And then I fed from someone directly and it seemed like he was almost happy I did." She stops again, staring off. "I left because I was scared I was going to change, become something, someone, different. Someone I don't want to be."
"Well, Caroline, tell me this," Stefan ducks his head so she'll look at him. "When you fed from her, were you happy?"
"No." Caroline says definitely, shaking her head. "Not at all."
"Then I don't think you have anything to worry about. Caroline, your self-control has always been astonishing. You haven't had a slip up in years. You even taught me how to handle my hunger. If you go off the rails, it's not going to be by mistake, it'll be because you want to." Stefan pauses. "Klaus's presence can be intoxicating. I know from experience. It's very…easy to lose yourself while he's around. To give in to the hunger, to embody the predatory nature of our species." He gives that far off look again, remembering. "But I think that if anyone can resist Klaus, it's you."
"But, Stefan," Caroline begins. "That's what I thought too, but I still found myself slipping up."
"Then maybe you should reconsider why you were slipping up." Caroline stares at Stefan, confused. "Maybe it wasn't Klaus getting into your head." He frowns, an almost sympathetic look in his eyes.
Her gaze slides from his face to her hands. "Maybe I was opening my mind up," she finishes. "Maybe I was accepting him."
They both remain silent for a moment. Finally Stefan asks, very quietly, "But why, Caroline? How?" He isn't accusing or judgmental at all. He's leading her to something. Something she's been denying for a while now.
Samira's eyes shine like emeralds in the soft light of the café in Cairo. Her head is cocked to the side, lips pursed, and eyes wide. "Do you love him?"
"No."
But she could, oh, she could.
Bonnie won't look at her, face darkened as the light of the old, antique lamp on her end table, littered with papers, shines behind her head. "Do you love him?"
"I don't know."
But maybe she's starting to figure it out.
Klaus's teeth sink a little too hard into her lip and she can't help letting out a little gasp, can't help her eyes flying open as the pain jolts her back to the real world, not one compromised of Klaus's lips or tongue or teeth or hands or scent.
But then he lets her leave and she's left standing shell-shocked long after he's gone.
Caroline's struck with a memory. She had caught a rabbit when she was a child with the help of her father. She desperately wanted to keep it, but her father insisted that it would be happier living in the wild. Caroline had cried for hours because she claimed to love it, having named the animal and everything. Her father had told her, gently, "If you love something, set it free." And so she did.
He let her be free.
How had she found herself accepting Klaus for the monster he is? (Was? Could be?)
Caroline finally looks at Stefan. Her brow knits and she chews on the inside of her cheek.
"I love him."
She doesn't realize she's been crying.
xx
I promise there won't be as long a wait next time. :)
-Reels