"Well look who's finally awake?" My mother says, opening the door.

"Yup." I whispered through clenched teeth.

"You slept all day, baby making you tired?" Whew, she sounds calm.

"Yeah, I guess."

"Well, I think that you should have your phone back, just in case of an emergency if we need to call you." She hands back my cell.

I yawn a little and check my phone. It's already 7 and I have 8 messages.

"Alright well, I'll warm you up some lasagna, be down in 10 minutes, it's important that you eat." I nod, and start going through my texts.

Ben 5:49

I carried you to your bed when we got back. No one was home so they don't know I brought you. They still think you're pregnant.

Ben 5:52

Doctor said to take some Ibeprofen if you feel bad. Just get some rest and get better. I love you.

Adrian 6:15

You did the right thing. Don't feel bad.

Adrian 6:18

Call me when you get up. Ben said you're sleeping right now.

Grace 6:23

I can't believe what you did. That baby was innocent. Murderer. I'd tell everyone what you did, except Ricky asked me not to. I'll be praying for the baby you killed.

Grace 6:26

I'm sorry. The Christian in me is angry, but I know how hard the decision must have been for you. I forgive you. I'll be praying for you.

Rickey 6:36

I thought you were better than that. It was my baby too, whether or not I knew about it earlier. How could you?

Ricky 6:45

I'm coming over at 7:30. We need to talk.

Wow. Well, I better call Adrian. Although I don't know what I'll say to her. I dial her number and wait for her to answer, thinking of what she might want to ask. Then she picks up.

"Hello, Amy?" I suck a quick breath in and answer her.

"Yeah, hey Adrian. You said to call you." I stand up and shut the door. If my mom heard me mention the a-b-o-r-t-i-o-n then she would murder me.

"Yeah, listen Amy. I know I sounded eager for you to-" she paused, searching for the word. "Terminate the pregnancy so that I could be with Ricky, but that wasn't the case. I just thought that you were too good to be tied to someone like Ricky like that. He's a player and wouldn't make a good father at all." The words 'terminate the pregnancy' springs tears to my eyes. I killed a baby, my baby. How would I ever forgive myself? At least Adrian was being nice, although I wasn't sure why.

"Thanks Adrian." I focused on keeping my voice controlled. "It means a lot that you said that. I feel like everyone's just angry at me for what I did." I recount the text messages, all of them angry and hateful except for Ben's and Adrians, and I guess Grace of you count her apology. Then when I tell her what Ricky said, I remember that he's going to be here it 15 minutes. I stand up and run to my closet to change. When I find some reasonable clothes, I stare down at my old ones. These carry bad memories, memories or pregnancy and babies, and my crime. I shudder and try to pay attention to Adrian's babble about where they should shove their words. Then my doorbell rings. I gulp and open my bedroom door, walking down the stairs toward the front door.

"Listen I got to go Adrian." I try to add some shock and puzzelment to my voice. "R-R-Ricky's here." She starts shouting but I hang up the phone and stow it away in my pocket. Then I take a deep breath and answer the door.

"H-h-hey Rickey. H-h-h-how's it going?" He looks frankly pissed. Nomally Ricky is easy going and always has a smile plastered on his face, but right now I can barely draw up the image of his grin.

"How can you even ask that?" His voice is a low growl, fermenting anger in its tone.

"Who's that?" My mother asks from the kitchen.

I put some fake nonchalance in my tone and shout, "Just a friend from school. Mind if we talk outside for a few minutes?" My mother peeks her head from the door. I close it a little, so she doesn't see that's its Ricky.

"That's fine, just be back in a little bit or your food will get cold." I try to smile, but she leaves before I can muster it on my face. I go outside and shut the door so the sound doesn't travel to my mom. Then we walk around to the side of the house where the swinging bench is. We sit in silence for a moment.

"I can barely look at you, you know that." Ricky spits. I just sit there. I deserve this, but I don't know why he cares all of the sudden. "I can't believe what you did. You just saw that it was a problem and got rid of it!" His tone was rising.

"I-I-I didn't know what else to do. I mean, Ben was okay with it but I doubt he'd want to raise another man's child." This only seems to make him angrier.

"Ben, that's who you're talking about right now! I would've taken care of it! Me! Not Ben!"

"How can you say that? You know you hated me for getting pregnant in the first place." I whispered the last few words out. I know my mom couldn't hear us, but the words were hard to say so loud.

"IT WAS MY BABY TOO!" He's crying now. I want to apologize, and tell him that if I could take it back I would, but I know in my heart it's not true. "I mean, to find out where you were from Grace and to not even be a part of the decision." This angered me. How could he say that? It was my decision.

"Really! Like you would've stayed home from dates taking care of it, or gotten a job just to support it. Admit it Ricky, you're happy I did it and you're angry right now only because I decided this without you aren't you? You aren't my husband or my boyfriend! You don't get a say." For a moment he's silent, then he gets closer to me.

"I could be, if you'd let me." Then his lips are on mine and I can't think. They're so soft and warm, but not as warm as Ben's. When I remember his name I'm alive with anger. I push Ricky off of me and slap him hard, my hand stinging with the aftershock.

"I'm with Ben, and you know that!" I give him a look of fury and storm off, or begin to when I see Ricky knocked to the floor by a flying blurred figure. Ben?

"How dare you put your filthy hands on my Amy?" Ben narrates each word with a punch, marking Ricky's face with bruises. Normally Ricky would flatten Ben, but the shock threw him off his game. I turn my head and see Adrian walking from her car. I notice that she looks angry, but not at me, at Ricky.

"Oh yeah, she liked my filthy hands on her at band camp." The words make my vision go red. How could he dare bring that up now. I pull Ben off the Ricky. He's still breathing hard, but the touch of my hand on his shoulder makes his madness stop. Ricky gets up, spitting blood onto the floor. I see white in the blood and think it might be a tooth.

"Get off my property you coward!" Fire is ringing though my voice and as he walks away, Adrian slaps him harder than I did.

"We are through." She spits the words like venom and stalks off toward us. Ricky looked stunned. His cheek was red and the impression of Adrian and mine's handprints added to Ben's bruises gave him the impression of a serious fight. Then he walked away to his car and drove away.

"Thanks Amy." Adrian aid. "For pushing him off." I nodded. Once I comprehended what was happening I had no other choice. I was in love with Ben. Speaking of, he slung his arm around my shoulder and squeezed gently.

"Yeah, thanks." He said it sweetly, and kissed my cheek. "I love you." He said. I smiled and kissed him back. His face was marked with freshly forming bruises, from where Ricky fought back.

"I love you too." Then a thought occurred to me. "Hey, why were you guys there?" Adrian gave me a guilty look.

"Well when you said you were going to talk to Ricky, I called Ben and we drove here. Then we saw you two talking and him kiss you. Ben was like in shock for a second, but when you pushed Ricky off of you and slapped him Ben charged at him." I smiled.

"Thanks." I gave Adrian a small hug.

"Anytime." Then she and Ben said goodbye and left. I walked inside.

"So did you tell him? I thought I heard shouting." She said. She was talking about the pregnancy. About the baby I got rid of. I guess she saw who it was. When I left she was furious, but Ashley texted me when I was in the waiting room and told me that she told my Mom I snuck out to see Ricky and tell him about the baby. She still thought I was pregnant. I gulped

"Uh, yeah. He took is better than I thought anyway. I'm going to eat in my room if that's okay."

"That's fine. Your vitamins are on the bed, don't forget to take them." I nodded, said goodnight, and went to my room. As soon as the door shut behind me, tears started falling down my face. The baby was dead. I killed it. How was I going to tell my mom? She'd figure out soon enough when I didn't get bigger, or at the very least when a baby didn't pop out of me in 5 months. I just sat on the floor, sobbing and eating lasagna for a while. Then my phone buzzed. I checked the text.

Ben 8:24

How are you?

Then another buzz.

Ben 8:25

We didn't get a chance to talk about anything. Curfew.

I smiled and texted back. "Bad. I feel like the world is crashing down around me and nothing I do can stop it." Buzz.

Ben 8:27

Don't feel bad. You did what you had too. You're only a teenager. Ricky will get over it. He's just in shock.

I texted back, "Thanks, I needed to hear that. I'm still worried about how to tell my mom though." Buzz.

Ben 8:30

Don't worry, you'll figure it out. We can talk about it tomorrow. The doctor said you should rest. Take some Ibuprofen and go to sleep. I love you.

I texted back, "Thanks, I love you too." Then stood up, plugged the charger into my phone, and went to bed.