Part One - Recovery

Chapter Two - They Say It's a Good Thing

...

"Shall we begin, my friend?"

"Soon, there are a few more things I would like to move into place."

"Why? I believe that the board is ideal at this moment."

"It never hurts to add a few more variables. It makes things more challenging, don't you think?"

"Yes, I do love a good challenge."

"I know you do, old friend; that's why you chose the most broken piece on the board."

"Broken he may be, but I see much potential in this little pawn."

"And I see many flaws; flaws which will be your downfall."

"That, we shall see."

...

It is amazing what people can do in the face of crisis; it is also very pitiful what people do in the face of crisis. Stress is the response of the body to any demand for change. It can be classified as good or bad depending on how the body reacts to it. Good stress can motivate while bad stress can cause burnout, both mental and physical sickness, and even destroy a person's life.

But, is it through stress and stressful situations that one can measure their strength. And if the mind and body are strong enough a person can turn out more powerful and better off than they were in the beginning. Of course, that all depends on how one deals with the situation. The mind is a remarkable thing; when dealing with stressful situations it can chose to live in delusions and make the situation worse or fight the situation head-on and overcome all obstacles.

...

Toushiro paused outside Momo's room. He had stopped so suddenly that Rangiku had run into his back. He stumbled forward slightly before bracing himself on the doorframe.

"Sorry, Captain," Rangiku mumbled and took a step back.

Toushiro sighed and glanced at the closed door. Part of him really did want to barge right in and see his sister, but another part of him wanted to run away in shame. He didn't want to see the look of betrayal and possibly disgust that would surely cover her face. He knew that he should want to see Momo after so long, but he couldn't bring himself to look past the shame and guilt.

Rangiku placed a hand on his shoulder. "Do you need a minute?"

He shook his head. "I think I'll see her tomorrow..."

"What? We're right outside her room now."

"Yes, I know that, Matsumoto-"

"Captain, if you keep putting this off Momo will have a real reason to be mad at you."

"Real reason? She already has a real-"

Matsumoto silenced him by pushing open the door and bouncing in. "Momo, you're awake!"

Toushiro hung his head when he heard Momo reply; her voice was soft and a bit hoarse, but she sounded cheery nonetheless. That was good, he told himself, she was in a good mood. He felt the slightest bit of relief upon hearing her speak, but it was quickly replaced with dread when he heard her ask for him.

"Oh, Captain's right outside. He's really nervous about seeing you." Rangiku answered happily.

"Why is he nervous?" Momo asked quietly.

"Um..." Rangiku poked her head around the door frame. "Come on, Captain."

He frowned at her and folded his arms across his chest then stuffed them into his sleeves. "Who said anything about being nervous?"

"Shiro, is that you?" Momo called upon hearing his voice.

He swallowed in an attempt to steel his nerves. Then picked up his crutch and, with square shoulders, limped into the room.

Momo was lying on the bed propped up by a stack of pillows. She looked thin and frail with dark circles under her eyes and messy hair, but she smiled widely when she saw him. It was all he could do to not let his shoulders slump in guilt and a hard lump formed in his throat.

He cleared his throat with a cough. "Hello, Hinamori, I'm glad to see that you're awake."

"Shiro!" she exclaimed, "What took you so long?"

He blinked. "I... uh, I was working."

She sighed softly, "You're always working."

"Well, I have to; I can't afford to be as carefree as some people."

She looked at him with large, imploring eyes. "Oh, Shiro."

"Enough about that. How are you feeling, 'cause you look terrible."

"Captain, you shouldn't say things like that," Rangiku admonished him.

Momo smiled again. "I'm alright, just a little tired-"

"Then shouldn't you be getting back to sleep? It's very late after all."

"Oh, don't you worry about me. Especially not when you're in this state; what happened to your leg?"

His mouth went dry as he looked down at his crutch. Exactly how was he supposed to bring this up without making her mad? He did not want to say that after he had almost killed her he stupidly rushed at Aizen and had nearly got half his body sliced away. He had deserved it for what he had done to her, but almost getting bisected still couldn't begin to rectify his betrayal.

"Was it from the accident?" Momo went on.

"Accident?" Rangiku asked, tilting her head.

Momo blushed. "That's what Captain Unohana called it. I can't remember how I ended up here; she told me that there was an accident and a lot of people got hurt, but I should focus on recovering instead."

Toushiro blinked in shock; she didn't remember the battle with Aizen? She didn't remember what he had done to her? He swallowed again and his heart began hammering at his rib cage and he felt beads of cold sweat form along his spine. He felt as if someone had hit him over the head with bokken; his head was swimming. She didn't remember the Winter War. Could this count as forgiveness? It was probably for the best that she didn't remember; she didn't deserve that kind of pain. She didn't deserve any of the pain he had caused her. He felt a tiny spark of relief blossom in his chest. He tried to ignore it; he should not be relieved at all.

"Well, I guess we can call it that," Rangiku mumbled. "Yeah, everyone's almost all better, so you really shouldn't worry about it."

"Oh, that's great," Momo sighed in relief. "I was worried when I didn't hear from some people yet."

"You only just woke up. I'm sure you'll get more visitors tomorrow."

"I know, but I kind of wanted to see Captain Aizen. I guess he's busy tonight, though, so I shouldn't be so selfish."

Rangiku made a strangled noise in her throat before playing it off as a cross between a giggle and cough. Toushiro had stopped breathing. The small bit of relief he felt had disappeared when she uttered Aizen's name. He felt dread and guilt begin to seep into his body; it wasn't just the Winter War she couldn't recall. How much damage had he caused? Did she think that Aizen wasn't a traitor, or did she not remember that he had left her for dead?

His head began to spin even faster and he began to feel dizzy. He tightened his fist around his crutch as his shoulder and thigh began to throb. No, she couldn't have forgotten all what Aizen had done to her. That bastard did not deserve a clean slate in Momo's eyes.

"Shiro, are you okay?" Momo asked, noticing his discomfort.

Rangiku placed a steadying hand on his shoulder but he shrugged her off.

"I'm fine," he snapped.

Momo obviously didn't believe him, but she knew that he wasn't going to explain anything. "Alright, but if you see Captain Aizen, could you tell him that-"

"I'm sorry to have to cut this meeting short, but Lieutenant Hinamori really should be getting some rest." Unohana strode into the room with a gentle smile on her face.

Toushiro let out a thankful breath.

"But I feel fine," Momo argued.

"You need to recover, and rest is essential. I'm sure Captain Hitsugaya and his lieutenant can visit you tomorrow."

She nodded sadly. "Okay, Shiro, Rangiku, thanks for coming to see me."

Unohana ushered them out of the room and softly closed the door behind her. She led them down the hallway until they were a considerable distance away from Momo's room. Then Unohana turned to Toushiro and Rangiku with a grim look.

"I'm sorry that I wasn't there to warn you about this."

Toushiro ground his teeth together.

"Lieutenant Hinamori has retained severe memory loss. We're not one hundred percent sure of how bad it is yet, but she seems to have forgotten all the events leading up to and after Aizen's defection. In her mind he's still a captain and a good person."

"Is this going to be permanent?" Toushiro asked.

"It's hard to tell at the moment, but I suggest that we play along with it for the time being and refrain from mentioning anything about Aizen until she gets better."

Toushiro chewed his bottom lip. "I understand. Is there anything we can do to help her recover?"

Unohana smiled at him. "Right now I think just having you visit her frequently should help quite a bit. Memory loss isn't uncommon in situations such as hers. Her brain is simply trying to cope by blocking out any stressful memories. I wouldn't worry too much over it, Hitsugaya, just give her your support and I'm sure she'll make a full recovery in no time at all."

He nodded. "Thank you, Unohana. I will visit her often in that case."

They wished each other a good night and he and Rangiku headed back to the Tenth. Toushiro's head was still spinning and the cool night air did nothing to calm him down.

"Well, this has been one hell of a night, hasn't it, Captain?" Rangiku said as she stretched her arms over her head.

Toushiro sighed in agreement. "Yes, it has been very trying."

They walked in silence for a little while. The only sounds were the chirps of the night insects and the wooden thump of Toushiro's crutch.

"Captain," Rangiku said suddenly, "about Momo..."

"What about her?"

"None of this is your fault, you know that, right?"

He paused to glare at her for a second. "I know it's not my fault; I'm not stupid. It's good that she doesn't have to deal with all those memories as soon as she woke up."

"Oh Captain..."

"Don't you 'Oh Captain' me."

...

"And so the board is set, my friend. Are you happy with the product?

"Very; broken pieces make the best players, after all."

...

Toushiro couldn't sleep that night. His shoulder and leg were on fire; they felt as if they had been newly hacked off. Hyourinmaru rumbled in comfort, trying to ease his pain, but even the dragon's ice-cold reiatsu couldn't help him; all he could do was lie still and wait for the pain to subside.

He had dreamt of the Winter War. He had watched himself from above the battle field as he had attacked Aizen and stabbed him straight through the chest. Then, as the illusion shattered, he stared down at Momo's shocked face. Her brown eyes were wide and the life fading fast. Blood leaked out from her mouth, down her chin, and joined the rapidly spreading stain on her chest. However, it was not pain that registered on her face it was betrayal.

"Shiro, why?" she asked, her voice breaking.

He covered his ears as his dream-self let out a terrible roar of agony. He woke with a start, sweating furiously, with his sheets tangled around his limbs.

Toushiro stared at the ceiling and tried to calm his racing heart. More often than not his dreams were disrupted by that memory. All he had to do was let it run its course and he would be fine. His arm and leg would stop hurting eventually then he could force himself to go back to sleep. The room was silent, save for his heavy breathing, and completely dark.

Still, he knew that tonight would not be like every other night he had woken up in pain. He knew that he would not be able to fall back asleep; his mind was a storm. He was happy that Momo would make a full recovery, but she had also lost her memories. So much had changed in the past months. Ichigo Kurosaki had turned the Seireitei upside-down, many shinigami had gotten stronger or perished, rules had been re-written, and so much had been lost. How could he pretend like none of that had happened? He could not make himself forget all that Aizen had done, even if it was for Momo's sake.

His arm throbbed harshly and he grunted in pain. Hyourinmaru rumbled, trying to soothe him, and told him to relax.

"I can't relax," he muttered, rolling over onto his good side. "Momo's lost memories are probably my fault as well. I don't deserve her forgiveness..."

Hyourinmaru growled.

"I suppose, in the long run, I'm too scared to ask for it anyway. I'm a coward, Hyourinmaru-"

"You are no coward, Little One. There isn't a craven bone in your body."

"Then why am I relieved that she can't remember?"

The dragon didn't have an answer to his question.

...

Momo recovered physically very quickly, but her memories showed no sign of returning. Toushiro was having a hard time dodging around the matter of Aizen and even though it made him sick to the stomach to act as if he hadn't betrayed them all, he put up with it for his sister. Then the day came that Momo was well enough to be released from the Fourth.

The captains and lieutenants had discussed what was to be done with her until she regained her memories. She was in no state to carry out her position as the lieutenant of the Fifth Division. Since Shinji Hirako was the new captain of the Fifth she could not go back to her old job, but they all agreed that staying in the Fourth would not be the best option for her either. They would have to take extreme precautions around her as they could not afford to lose another seated shinigami. Unohana had cautioned them all to not shock her with information about Aizen and the war; Momo's mental state was very delicate and she could very well go insane as a result of carelessness.

"Why not send the girl back to the Rukongai until she recovers?" Shunsi Kyoraku, the captain of the Eighth Division, suggested. He turned to Toushiro, "Your grandmother still lives there, right?"

"I would prefer to have her in a more controlled environment," Unohana stated, "unless we send someone with her, we have no way to make sure that she won't find out about Aizen until she's ready. I'm sure many stories have circulated around Junrinan."

"I could simply perform tests on her to aid her in recovering her memories," Mayuri Kurotshuchi, resident mad scientist and captain of the Twelfth, said smugly.

"Absolutely not," Toushiro growled, "she's not some test subject."

Mayuri rolled his eyes. "Did you forget who regenerated her organs in the first place? And how's that new arm suiting you? "

Toushiro clenched his jaw. "It could be better."

"You little-"

"Enough," Yamamoto ordered, tapping his cane on the floor. "Bickering like children won't help us to figure this situation out."

"The Tenth's captain can't help it," Mayuri muttered.

Toushiro narrowed his eyes as Yamamoto gave Mayuri a sharp glare.

"Are there any more suggestions?"

Izuru Kira, Lieutenant of the Third, stepped forward and bowed to the head-captain. He was granted permission to speak. "We could place her under the care of a few close friends. I know that we're all busy, but I'm sure that a few of us could make sure that her recovery goes smoothly. I've heard that seeing familiar faces could help to recover memories."

Renji Abari, lieutenant of Squad Six, stepped forward as well. "I agree with that Idea, we could also make sure that no one let's anything slip about Aizen."

Yamamoto nodded then turned to Unohana.

"This seems reasonable," she said, "But the trouble will lie in making it seem like we're not babysitting lieutenant Hinamori."

"So, who should we select for the job?" Captain Kyoraku asked, scratching his beard.

"Captain Hitsugaya," Yamamoto boomed, "you are related to Lieutenant Hinamori, correct?"

Toushiro nodded. "Yes, sir; I consider her to be my sister."

"Very well, Lieutenant Hinamori will be placed under your care."

Rangiku made a soft disapproving sound. Touhsiro glanced over his shoulder at her, but she just shook her head and continued to stare at the head-captain.

Renji and Izuru offered their help, since they were Momo's former classmates, friends, and knew her well. Captain Hirako promised to make himself scarce as well as the new captain of the Ninth; Kensei Muguruma and the rest of the visored who had taken positions as lieutenants. They would have to come up with a story as to who they were if Momo ever came across them as well as what happened to Azien, Ichimaru, and Tousen.

...

"Why can't I go back to my own room?" Momo whined as Toushiro led her to the Tenth's barracks.

"Because you aren't fully recovered yet, so stop whining like a child." Toushiro snipped.

She pouted. "But I feel fine."

"You are not, however. Be thankful that you don't have to stay in the Forth anymore."

"He's right," Rangiku interjected, "Besides, this way we get to spend the whole day together."

Momo sighed, "I still feel like I should be helping Captain Aizen."

Toushiro stiffened.

"You would be more of a hindrance than a help as long as you don't have all your memories. He'd have to waste a lot of time explaining what is going on." Rangiku supplied. Toushiro had to give it to her; the woman could lie on her feet.

Momo's shoulders slumped slightly.

"Don't let it bother you too much, Momo, I'm sure you'll get better really soon."

She smiled a bit. "I guess you're right, Rangiku."

The strawberry-blond woman slung an arm around Momo's neck and grinned. "It's going to be so much fun. We can stay up all night and have snacks and gossip. Oh, I know we can invite the Women's Association and have a tea party to celebrate your release from the Fourth. We can go to the spa and shop. I'm so excited; I can't wait!"

Momo's smile was full blown now and she clasped her hands together in glee.

"Hey, Rangiku, don't forget you have work tomorrow as well," Toushiro grumbled.

She waved her hand, dismissing his words. "I'm on sick leave, Captain."

"No," he growled, "you're not."

She giggled then continued to plan events with Momo until they reached the room she would be using then left her to get settled in. The heads of the Tenth then made their way back to the office.

"Rangiku," Toushiro spoke as he sat down at his desk. He had been standing for most of the day and, even though his leg had healed enough that he could walk by himself, it still bothered him slightly.

"Yes, Captain?" Rangiku replied, sinking into the couch.

"What was that about during the meeting? You acted as thought you didn't want Hinamori to be placed under my care."

She sighed, tilting her head back. "Well to be frank, you're still recovering as well."

He narrowed his eyes. "You didn't think I could handle it?"

She turned to him and was silent for a while. "I know you can handle it, but I don't want you to push yourself too hard. Momo has put us all in a difficult situation and I don't want you to be the one to shoulder the burden all by yourself."

Toushiro frowned slightly, pausing as he opened one of the files sitting on his desk. "Kira and Abarai are going to help. You don't need to worry about me all the time; I won't over do it."

She raised an eyebrow. "Promise me that."

"What?"

"I said; promise that you won't over do it."

He sighed, "Matsumoto-"

"I know how you are, Captain, now promise me you will take care of yourself as well, or I'll go to Yamamoto and tell him that you aren't fit for the job."

He rolled his eyes. "Fine, but only if you do your share of the paperwork."

"That's not fair, Captain; I'm sick, remember."

"Yeah, that's what I thought."

...

Later that evening Momo had wondered into the office and she and Rangiku were happily chatting away and drinking tea on the couch. Toushiro had to admit that their blissful chatter lifted his spirits somewhat, even if they were talking about nail polish and facials.

"I need more male friends," he sighed, shaking his head.

Momo giggled softly.

"Can you feel the testosterone leaving your body, Captain?" Rangiku chortled.

He rolled his eyes and went back to his paperwork. "Hey, Rangiku, have you seen the report from the team we sent to the Rukongai?"

She frowned slightly, "Nope."

"That's odd; it should have been in by yesterday."

"Maybe it got held up in transport," Momo suggested.

"I suppose," he leaned back into his chair and rubbed his wrist. "I shouldn't worry about it. They're good men; it'll be in soon."

He really shouldn't have been worried; a few days tardiness wasn't uncommon if a platoon was stationed outside of the Seireitei. But he still felt concerned; there had been a slight increase in the number of hollows over the months. It was nothing too serious and his men could handle the danger. Still, he had sent another tea as backup just to be safe. They had left two weeks ago, but he hadn't heard anything from them since. He had been hoping that the report would ease his mind on the matter, however it was late and –

"If you keep frowning like that you're going to get wrinkles, Shiro," Momo sang.

"Shut up, Bed-wetter,"

"Shiro! Don't call me that; that's mean."

He smiled slightly and closed the outpost team's file. "I think I'm going to head in for the night."

"Captain," Rangiku gasped, "It's still light out! Are you feeling well?"

He rolled his eyes. "Weren't you just giving me grief about working too hard? There's no pleasing you, is there?"

Rangiku grinned and jumped up from the couch. "Come on, Momo, we should head in too. We can get started early on baking cookies!"

Toushiro hid a chuckle as he left the two in the office. Maybe taking care of Momo wouldn't be so hard after all. She really did seem like she was going to get better.

...

"I told you he was full of surprises."

"Yes, but the game has barely begun."

The definition of stress by Hans Selye - the scientist who coined the term.

This was a calm chapter before the impending doom. Also, to the people who were concerned, this is not going to be a HitsuHina story. I consider them to be siblings and therefore not romantically attracted to one another.

Someone almost guessed correctly who is pulling the strings behind it all :) Leave a thought on your way out?

- Mymomomo