March of the Planktons

by DualThreatPepper

After going through an existential crisis due to an incident with hot sauce and a shower, Plankton and his wife Karen embark on a journey to find out the true meaning of life, love, and friendship, and save their marriage. Their voyage takes a rocky turn when they discover a local church led by the Reverend Eugene H. Krabs isn't what it says it is.

6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

"Sheldon you have not been a very supportive husband, you know. I have every right to leave you and your sorry excuse for a lover!" Karen shouted.

"But babe, you are my lover!" Plankton said back.

"Not me, you poop wad! Him!"

Karen leaned her head monitor thing in the direction of Rev. Krabs. She did this because she has no arms. She is just a computer with wheels.

"What?!" Rev. Krabs said, surprised. "Me? His lover? Are you forreal?"

"Yes I am forreal! I am always forreal!" Karen shouted.

"Okay 'always forreal', do you have evidence to support your claims?" Plankton asked.

"Yes, I do! I always have evidence! And stop with the dad jokes! You don't even have kids!"

"Or do I?" Plankton said suspiciously.

"What?!" Rev. Krabs said, very surprised. "Him? Children? Are you forreal?"

"Yes I am forreal! I am always forreal!" Plankton shouted.

"How come I don't know about this?! I am the mother or something!" Karen said.

"Karen I am pregnant!" Plankton shouted.

Everyone was shocked. How could this happen? Plankton is a plankton while Karen is merely a computer with wheels! Karen pondered this for a minute.

"Plankton you are SO not pregnant!"

"Okay fine, you got me", Plankton admitted. "But Rev. Krabs is definitely the father!"

Everyone was shocked yet again. They could not believe the Revered Krabs would father illegitimate children! It went against every principle laid down for Krabsologist priests. In fact, these were standards that Rev. Krabs had set for himself.

"I hath forsaken thee, mine Lord! Banisheth me unto thy dark caverns, o harbinger of patty!" The Reverend sobbed. "Forgiveth me, and let thine own self destroyeth me until thou hast done upon me what thineself hast doneth unto thou!"

"What the everloving dumpster are you saying?!" Karen asked.

"I only asketh of the Lordeth what he requireth of me!" said the Reverend.

"That is too much -eth! If you keep saying -eth, soon you will be doing meth!"

"Too late! I have already done 7 meths today! And I will keep doing meths until I explode from meth consumption! Mwahahaha!" Plankton yelled.

"Plankton! How couldst thou! Thou art carrying our child!" Krabs cried.

"So you are pregnant?! How could you, Plankton? How could you do this to me? I thought I raised you to be more responsible than this!" Karen sobbed.

"You didn't raise me Karen, I was raised by wolves! That's why I love the taste of raw meat!" Plankton responded.

"But Plankton you are a vegetarian!" Karen yelled.

"I am most definitely not a vegetarian!"

"Then why have I been making you vegetarian meals all these years?!"

"I don't know!"

It was at this moment that Karen knew her marriage was over,