Harry sat in the common room in his favorite squashy armchair by the fire. He thought of the lessons that day in History of Magic and recollected back on how Adam Ledger, famed Wizard Pirate, was not so much different than himself. They both had an Aunt and Uncle who were complete gits and they both had parents who sadly were long gone. It was oddly comforting to know that there were others out there like him.
"Hermione!" Ron said angrily, pushing a first year out of the seat next to Harry. "If you don't keep that bloody cat away from Scabbers, I will transfigure it into a big, furry, orange hat!"
"Oh come on, Ron," Hermione said, taking the last armchair, Crookshanks in her lap. "I have told you a million times, he can't help it. It's in his nature. Right Crookshanks?" Hermione cooed to the cat who purred contentedly.
"There is nothing 'natural' about that cat," Ron muttered to Harry so Hermione could not hear. "I'm a bloody animagus if Crookshanks doesn't have it in for Scabbers." Harry snorted.
"Come on, we need to finish our research on those pirates. And remember, Ron, Ozzy had a cat too."
"I doubt Ramses was as off as Crookshanks…"
…
Ozzy lazed in the sun next to Ramses as Killian paced back and forth.
"Aw, come on!" He grumbled. "I want some excitement!" Ozzy gave him a weird look.
"Dunno about you, but I've still had enough 'excitement' from this morning." Ozzy said.
"Maybe I should be more specific," Killian grumped. "I want some entertainment! Accordion Girl ruined wizard's chess for us, not that I mind, and Rosalie stopped exploding snap because it frightened her bird."
"Hey, I heard that!" Rosalie barked from the quarterdeck above. Ozzy grinned.
"Ears of a hawk, that one."
"Eyes too," Rosalie said, jumping down onto the main deck with a glare at Killian. "Anything that distresses my bird is bad in my book. Gypsy is family to me." Hearing her name, the magnificent macaw flew onto Rosalie's arm from the ship railing, whistling 'Wizards of the Sea' as she carefully tucked a piece of flyaway hair behind Rosalie's ear with her beak. "Ha, thanks Gypsy." Rosalie said, stroking the bright feathers of her beloved bird.
"Still, we have several hours before we reach Octavia, and with Accordion Girl taking her nap, nothing interesting is going on!" Killian griped.
"Alrighty then," Rosalie said. "Adam! The crew wants a show! How about we give them one?" The crew cheered and gathered around, stomping excitedly.
"Well then, let's give them a show worth watching then, ay?" Adam challenged.
"Ha!" Rosalie laughed, Gypsy fluttering back to the railing. "Rapier or cutlass?"
"Rapier." Adam responded, pulling out his own in turn.
"Very well then," Rosalie said, drawing her own sapphire hilted blade. "You know the rules; no fire, no magic, and no maiming."
"So the usual then?" Adam said with a smirk.
"You got it!" Rosalie replied with a grin.
"So," began Adam. "Why don't we get this started?"
"Why don't we?" With that she launched herself at Adam who raised his sword with ease to block her blade. He parried and struck with force at Rosalie who in turn parried and swiped downward, almost getting within his guard. Her fellow wizard quickly blocked it and stabbed at Rosalie who blocked in turn and cut up with her sword.
Adam parried her cut, then stabbed again towards Rosalie's shoulder. She deflected his attack to the side, then performed an aggressive thrust of her own. Her friend send his blade crashing into hers, but was blocked as she performed an elegant whirl and struck towards him. Adam barely managed to recovered before she pressed the attack, sending him to the ground. With a flourish, Rosalie placed the tip of her rapier on his chest.
"Over!" Rosalie laughed.
"Good match!" Adam replied as his captain helped him up. The rest of the crew applauded loudly as the two duelists bowed.
"Excellent, I might have to challenge both of you sometime," Ozzy grinned. "Adam first, though."
"Always a good spectacle." Bilius said, while Leonard nodded and munched on a biscuit.
Ozzy stepped over to Rosalie. "Have you got anything that floats and makes a good target? And that yeh don't mind losing?"
Rosalie thought for a moment. "Actually, yes, we do. Bilius! Go fetch those round buoys we found!"
"Aye!" The Ravenclaw disappeared below decks, only to reappear in a couple minutes carrying a crate full of large red balls.
"What do you want to do with these?" Rosalie asked, looking from the crate to Ozzy, who was smiling.
"Anyone up for a shootin' contest?" He called, unbuckling the lock for his sword.
"Sure." Killian said as he stepped forwards.
"Why not." Bilius shrugged.
"Wonderful!" Ozzy exclaimed. "Throw three of these out, we'll go out a ways and take our shots. Don't let the swan get them."
The pirates did as the wizard suggested, and with three calls of "Locomotor!" the buoys slowly floated away from the Night Swan. Rosalie stepped back behind Ozzy, Killian and Bilius, who stood at the side of the ship armed with various forms of flintlocks.
"Load!" She called, and the three pirates did. "Aim!"
Ozzy raised his sword while Killian and Bilius aimed down their iron sights.
"FIRE!" Three shots rang out. When the smoke cleared, Rosalie drew her spyglass and gazed out at the targets. "Congratulations, Oswald, you're dead center. Bilius, you're second, and Killian, work on your aim." The crew howled with laughter as they clapped the competitors on the back.
"Captain!" A crewman by the name of Willet suddenly shouted. "You might wanna see this!" Rosalie frowned and marched over to the other side of the ship.
"Oh bloody hell!" She swore. "It's another ship!" The crew all turned and ran to the port side of the ship, looking at the fast approaching vessel apprehensively.
"Do you think it's another wizard's ship?" Adam asked, peering at the boat.
"Can't tell from here." Rosalie said. "Alright! Wands away, we are going to assume they are muggles. Hold your fire." The crew rushed around, hurriedly stowing away all signs of magic while Rosalie stilled the spell that animated the prow. The other ship, fairly standard in appearance pulled up alongside them.
"Ahoy there!" Another voice called out. "Where be you goin' on this fine day?"
"Our destination is of no concern," Rosalie called out to the other captain. "I could ask you the same."
"Do you know of the Hallows?" The captain called to Rosalie.
"Aye," che called back, relaxing immediately. "The wand, the cloak and the stone."
"Ah! Might I inquire the name of your ship?"
"I am Captain Rosalie, and this is the Night Swan."
"And would you be headed for Octavia?"
"Indeed we are," Rosalie answered. "Can you tell us if Alfred is in?"
"Aye, he is," The other called back. "We just left port this afternoon. Tell him that you ran into Dorian!"
"Will do!" Rosalie cried as other ship pulled away. "Full steam ahead!" The crew immediately went back to work, magic and all. Just then, Accordion Girl appeared from the depths of the ship.
"Hey guys!" She cried cheerfully. "What did I miss?"
"We just ran into another ship," Killian said. "And I'm glad to run into you." Accordion Girl grinned obliviously.
"Oh, really? Did you make lunch?" She said excitedly. "Hey, Rosalie, you want some lunch?" Accordion Girl asked, skipping over towards Rosalie. "Killian made it!"
"We already had lunch," Rosalie said, confusedly. As Accordion Girl skipped across the deck, her wand fell from her pocket, causing the excitable Hufflepuff to slip.
"Oi! Watch out!" Ozzy cried, moments too late.
"What?" Rosalie said, turning just in time to see Accordion Girl come flying at her. "Aaaaaaahhh!" Rosalie tumbled over the railing of the ship and into the sea with a yelp.
"Woman overboard!" Killian shouted as the rest of the crew came running. Ozzy leaned over the rail, looking down into the foamy blue water. Moments later, Rosalie resurfaced, sputtering angrily.
"MERLIN'S BEARD, ACCORDION GIRL!" She hollered, spitting out sea water. "WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING, WILL YOU!"
Accordion Girl looked like she was going to cry. Adam pulled out his wand and conjured a lifesaver out of thin air. He threw it to Rosalie, who was treading water and glaring daggers. Between the two of them, Bilius and Adam had her back onboard in a jiffy.
"I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" Accordion Girl whimpered as Rosalie sat on a barrel, pouring water out of her boots. Rosalie rolled her eyes.
"It's alright," she said, sounding exasperated. She pulled out her wand and pointed it at her sopping clothes, blasting them with hot air. "'Bout time I took a bath. Just next time make sure I am out of the way before you decide to blunder around."
"Really?" Accordion Girl grinned. "I still feel bad though, why don't I help you dry out your clothes?"
"No!" Rosalie said quickly, sounding rather panicked. "Why don't you go and peel some potatoes."
"Okie-dokie!" Accordion Girl said, skipping away.
"Phew, that was a close call," Rosalie said once she had disappeared from view. "She probably would have set me on fire or something."
"You think?" Ozzy rolled his eyes. "She's the cheeriest terror I've ever met."
"Right, well I'm going up to the crow's nest before I get knocked overboard again," Rosalie said, standing up. "Adam, you're in charge." She sauntered off and Ozzy looked at Adam.
"Why are we keeping Accordion Girl again?"
"Who knows…"
"Who cares!" Killian interjected. "She makes wonderful eye candy!" Ozzy cuffed Killian good-naturedly and went back to work.
Several hours later, the sky had grown mostly dark and the white stars had come out, the waves reflecting their light. The sky in the west had settled into a coral pink color with several cays silhouetted in the fading light.
"Land ho!" Rosalie cried from above, peering at the tiny islands ahead through her spyglass. "Oi, Ozzy, catch!"
Ozzy looked up in surprise and held out his arms just in time to catch Rosalie.
"Ha!" She laughed, jumping onto the deck. "That was like some crazy trust fall!" Killian and Adam chortled as Rosalie rounded up the crew. "Alright, lads!" She cried. "Octavia is ahead and you are free to spend the night as you wish!" The crew cheered enthusiastically at this. "Just make sure you control yourselves and are back on the Night Swan by sun up, I want no intoxicated sailors tagging along while we hunt down Morcant!" The crew laughed and started to guide the Night Swan into the harbor.
"Have you been here before?" Ozzy asked, looking at the yellow lamplight spilling out over the water.
"Of course, have you?" Rosalie answered. Ozzy shook his head.
"Nope," Killian said. "Any good pubs on Octavia?" Rosalie laughed, a pretty sound.
"You bet there are!" She said. "Stick with me, and when we meet Alfred you will get the finest ale Octavia has to offer."
"Deal!" Killian answered eagerly.
"Raaak!" Gypsy squawked. "Good ale!"
"Ooh, may I go? Please? Please?" Accordion Girl bounced up and down.
"Yes, you can." Rosalie smiled.
"Yay!"
The crew successfully docked the Night Swan and marched across the docks, the animated prow watching them go fondly. Rosalie expertly lead Adam, Ozzy, Killian and Accordion Girl through the dark and magical winding streets past many lesser pubs, stopping in front of a well maintained establishment.
A signboard depicting a palm tree bore in white scrolling letters; The Eighth Child. Rocious laughter came from the pub, accompanied by a hearty drinking tune. A drunken sailor staggered out with his tankard singing horribly off key.
"The wand of our captain is pointing at you…" His voice faded away as he disappeared off down the dark street.
"Right," Rosalie said cheerfully. "Ready to meet Alfred 'Pickle' Morren?"
"Lead the way." Ozzy said, bowing with a flourish. The group strode into the bar and Rosalie marched straight up to the bartender.
"Is Alfred in? We wish to speak with him."
"Who should I tell him is asking?"
"Tell him Rosalie Fawcett is here."
"Alright," The man said slowly. "Just wait here for a minute." He vanished through a door leading to the back. Adam ordered everyone drinks as the band took song requests.
"Witches and Mead!" Someone shouted. "Witches and Mead!"
"Ha, this is a good one!" Rosalie said, leaning back in her chair. The band started to play, and bar goers began to sing.
"When I come back from a mighty quest
I have no need for sleep or rest
I head to a tavern for a drink
And get so drunk I cannot think
A witch by my side and a jug of mead
These are the things that I most need
So I sit back and sing this song
And drink and spellcast all night long
Hey! Hey!
I wanna meet witches
Hey! Hey!
Witches and mead
Hey! Hey!
I wanna meet witches
Witches and mead are what I need
When I come back from a mighty quest
I have no need for sleep or rest
I head to a tavern for a drink
And get so drunk I cannot think
A witch by my side and a jug of mead
These are the things that I most need
So I sit back and sing this song
And drink and spellcast all night long
Hey! Hey!
I wanna meet witches
Hey! Hey!
Witches and mead
Hey! Hey!
I wanna meet witches
Witches and mead are what I need!"
The song ended amid the cheers, and a gnarled, older man came in through a back door. Rosalie caught sight of him and stood with a wave as the peg leg hobbled over.
"Aw, well if it ain't the Rose of the Sea!" He cried, taking Rosalie's hand and kissing it. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"
"Al, an old charmer as always!" Rosalie laughed. "I am afraid a dark matter has brought me here, old friend. Do you mind if we discuss this elsewhere?"
"Oh, not at all," Alfred said. "And your friends are quite welcome to joins us! Come along now, I've got plenty of ale for all!"
"Wonderful!" Killian exclaimed. "What are we waiting for?"
Author's Note:
The song here is based on Alestorm's Wenches and Mead, changes by Frederic Axel Rorland.