KYAA I'm sorry it's taken longer than I said it would, but I had a bit of a writers block. plus with the holidays coming up and all…bleah but I really wish I could have had this chapter out yesterday, but unfortunately, my time machine is on the fritz…
And Miss0made are you getting into my notes?? ; the same day I read your comment, I realized I had the 'patent' joke in this chapter…so I didn't steal it, we just think alike, okays?
And now the semi-obligatory thanks for reviews. Thank you everyone who did, for reviewing! I'm glad you all liked it, I hope I don't disappoint you all with this long arse chapta…
Oh yeah I forgot it in the other chappie, but I don't own Naruto. (So I'm sorry for those of you who were fooled.)
Like Heaven
Chapter 2:
Gaara
"And that's…pretty much what happened."
"Oh. Is that…so."
Temari had been mad at me the whole day for yelling at her and then running away, and it had taken me ten minutes just to get her to listen to me. Women are so hard to please…
"Yes. Pretty much."
"Really now…"
We were sitting in her one room apartment thing, there was only one bed, but that was fine since I didn't sleep anyway. She only used it for the time she spent at the Chuunin meetings, but it was surprisingly well furnished. There were even some dolls on her bed; one was a panda I recognized from her own room at home (one she semi-affectionately named Senor Gaa), and another I had never seen before, that kind of looked like a big awkward white amoeba with an abstract looking face. I didn't feel like asking what it was, mostly because it creeped me out (which was a feat few things, especially a stuffed toy, could accomplish).
Speaking of things that were awkward, Temari hadn't said much ever since I had told her the whole deal (even the parts about me following her to Konoha because of her smell). But she didn't seem to be angry about it; I could tell (well, everyone in a three mile radius can tell when she's angry). But there was something…malicious in the air. And I had a feeling for once it wasn't me.
"So…you are saying…Shukaku was the one who made you do it." Perhaps I had imagined it, but there seemed to be a hint of sarcasm in her voice.
"Yes, I just told you that." I disliked repeating myself, and generally talking more than
I had too.
"Huh. Well that's…interesting." This time I definitely heard the sarcasm. But not angry sarcasm, more like mocking…
Another long pause. The white amoeba thing was staring at me. I had half a mind to turn it around towards the wall, but then I'd have to explain to her why, and I felt I'd done enough explaining today. Not to mention how absurd "Your doll thing scares me" would sound, especially coming from me.
"What are you gonna tell her?"
She asked me, a little too nicely, as she chewed the corners of her mouth in a weird way. I was starting to get suspicious of her.
"Nothing." I was planning on avoiding her.
Temari sent a cautious glance my way and then an evil smile broke out on her face, as she was no longer able to hide it by chewing her cheeks.
"…You know what I think you should do."
I felt myself grow uneasy. I knew what was coming next…She thought I was lying to her, and making excuses to cover up my embarrassment. And she was going to make fun of me for it.
"Temari, I'm being serious—
"You should explain everything to her. Tell her…" she stood up off the bed, a desperate far off look in her eyes.
"…how you are so in love with her that you couldn't help but make out with her right there on the spot!!"
I tried to glare at her as hard as I possibly could, but I knew there was no stopping her now. The only thing Temari loved more than fighting was teasing Kankurou and me (now that I had promised not to kill them). Senor Gaa was a perfect example of this fact; named after me because she thought his panda eyes looked like the dark rims around my own.
"OH, Hyuuga-chan!" Temari picked up Gaa and stared lovingly into its lifeless button eyes. "I just can't control myself, I just…LURV you so MUCH!!" And to my horror, she started to pretend make-out with the poor thing.
"TEMARI!!"
"Mwah mwah mwah, oh say you'll be mine!"
She then embraced the bear and turned to me, her eyes aflame with her own strange brand of sibling love.
"Temari, I'm seriously going to kill you if you—
"Or, you could just glare at her all scary like and command her to be your sex slave."
Something exploded inside of me. Shukaku had liked that option…a little too well.
"Temari stop it." I said through gritted teeth.
But she wasn't listening; now she was placing Gaa on the nightstand and pointing a finger menacingly at its little forehead.
"Hyuuga woman! You are going to have-my-babies, and that's all there is to it!"
Gaa gave no response. She then picked up the panda and swung it under her arm kidnapping style, and pointed now to the horizon she had imagined in her head.
"Now, make haste! Those babies aren't going to make themselves!!"
Temari turned to face me now, a crooked smile on her face, and pressed Gaa into my face.
"And you wibbed Happa-wee evah aftah." For a second, I just glared at the thing. Then I grabbed Gaa's face and threw him into the trash can.
"…Are you quite done?"
She seemed only now to notice the fact that I was extremely angry with her.
"Awwww…Gaara I'm sorry."
She sat down next to me now, her soft scent now devoid of its former burn helping me calm down a bit.
"I don't want to stay here."
She paused for a second, in thought, and then sighed.
"Alright. Then we'll leave."
This surprised me. I almost thought she was being sarcastic; wouldn't be the first time today.
"…Are you serious?"
She was up already, gathering up a few more papers (as of yet un-filled out) and tossing them in the trash can while she retrieved her panda.
"Sure. I hate this paperwork anyway. I only come for the food. Konoha has really good tea and dumplings…"
That seemed an unlikely reason to make a three day journey (as in it was obviously a lie), but I let it go, not wanting to make her change her mind.
"Is it alright for you to leave?"
Temari seemed to think on it a moment, before she shrugged.
"I dunno. I'll ask the Hokage, but she's aware of your condition. And its not like they are short handed or anything this year…I bet they can let me go."
This was probably the first really decent thing Temari had ever done for me, as sad as that sounds.
"Thank you, Temari…"
She made a face.
"Ergh. That's how I know we need to leave. You're saying 'thank you'."
Temari made her way to the door, presumably to go talk to the Hokage like she said.
"Stay here; I'll be back in an hour or so and then we'll leave. The sooner we get back the sooner you can get back to being normal, scary Gaara."
From Temari, this was a compliment of sorts.
"Thank you."
She stuck her tongue out at me.
"You better stop that, I'm serious."
And she was gone.
later…
That thing was staring at me.
The white poofy thing with the weird face. It was obviously handmade, you could tell since the face was lopsided in some places, the smile wasn't quite straight, and one eye was bigger than the other. It looked like some kind of creepy voodoo doll, or some oversized retarded pin cushion. Being in a room alone had never bothered me much, but being alone with this thing…it even smelled funny. It too, had that burning smell…
"You are the embodiment of everything I hate in this world." Idiocy and burning scents, to be exact. It (of course) gave no answer, and just continued to stare at me with that vacant stupid grin.
"What the hell are you supposed to be anyway?" Again, no answer. Should I be concerned with the fact that I'm talking to a doll?
"That's it." I got up and turned the thing around, screw Temari, if she asks, I'll lie.
There was name on its back. Kumomaru, it said. Cloud boy.
And on top of that name, there was another $$#ing face. It was smiling, too.
I left the little apartment thing, happy to be away from that stupid burnt smelling cloud, and made my way to the large gates. We were leaving anyway, right? Temari would know where I'd gone…
Hinata
"T-Temari-san?"
I fumbled around with her name in my mouth, searching for a last name to accompany "-san", as I normally did with people I didn't know well. But I found that I didn't recall Temari or Gaara ever having a last name…how strange.
I had found her (at last) in the main building of Konoha, the same place where all this trouble began. It had been a while since then (well, maybe only a few hours since then). I had finished training with Kiba, and he had reluctantly let me go home, on the condition that I stayed away from "that creepy sand guy".
Well he never mentioned the "creepy sand sister", right…? So technically I was still keeping my promise…
"Yes, who is— oh." She turned, and stopped mid sentence once she saw it was me. Her lips curled into a sneer slash smile, and there was something decidedly evil about it that made me feel a bit uneasy.
"Oh, hello, Hinata-san. Looking for my little brother, maybe?"
I wilted considerably upon hearing this.
"No! Ah…ahh…I m-mean…nnn…(maybe)…" Good job making yourself look like an idiot, Hinata! Stupid stupid stupid…
Now Temari would probably laugh at me, and I would melt into a puddle of goo, to be swept up by the janitor-nin and put with the trash where I belonged…
"Hee hee you're turning red. The very memory of your—
"Stop teasing Hinata, Sunako." A low baritone voice echoed through the empty hallway, a hint of annoyance in his voice. Temari whipped around, searching for the face of the man who would so boldly disturb her fun.
"'Sand girl'? Just who do you think you're talking to, huh?!"
There was an exasperated sigh, like the kind an old man gives when dealing with foolish young children.
"Geez…first you come telling me you're quitting, now I find you picking on a girl two years your junior. Sometimes I wonder if you're really a woman, Temari…"
A familiar boy with a ponytail and a Chuunin vest made his way down the hall towards us, and I knew instantly who it was.
"Shikamaru-kun!" I said happily, relieved of my fate as a Hinata-goo.
"Baka-Chuunin, I outrank you now, you can't tell me to do anything." She huffed.
Temari glared at him, but there was a change in her expression, something that made all her features look a bit…softer. It was so subtle I doubt I would have caught it had I not been a Hyuuga.
"And if you wonder if I'm a woman, it's probably because I'm easily more of a man than you are, Kumomaru."
She spat out the last word like it was an insult, but the ends of her mouth turned up to form a crooked smile. Or was it a sneer, too? It was too subtle of a line for even my byakugan to define…
"That might be true…"Shikamaru turned to me, half smiling.
"…but that's probably because you're easily manlier than most men—right, Hinata?"
Temari's small smile/sneer vanished, and her face turned red.
"N-no! You're just a sorry excuse for a man—right, Hinata?"
"Huh??"
Now they were both looking at me, and I had become Hinata-goop.
"Well…I'm not really…ahh…there are…I don't think…"
Temari seemed to loose her patience.
"Forget it!"
She stormed off, taking with her my one chance for a meeting with Gaara. But I wasn't foolish enough to follow her; right now, Temari scared me worse than anything Gaara might have done to me.
"Like I care what either of you think anyway…" She said 'either of you' as if it were directed at both of us, but I was pretty sure she cared about a certain someone's opinion…
Shikamaru seemed to sense it too, but he looked less worried about it than I was.
"Geez, Temari, I was only kidding!"
"I said I don't care!" She yelled back, even though it was kind of obvious that she did.
Shikamaru sighed again, his almond eyes still as sleepy looking as always. He glared off in her direction, but still talked to me.
"You know, she doesn't like to admit it, but Temari is very self-conscious about her femininity. I thought I could get her off your back if I made fun of her a little…"
He turned to me now, a slightly exasperated look on his face.
"And now I'm probably going to have to apologize…" He made a face at me, as if hinting at the 'troublesome' things he was probably going to do to get on Temari's good side again.
"Well, is there something you wanted, Hinata-san?"
"Um…actually…"
I turned to look off in Temari's direction, but she was long gone.
"I w-wanted to…um…ask Gaara-sama something."
I wanted to apologize, really. I hadn't been myself the whole rest of the day, thinking about what had happened over and over…admittedly, much more than I should have. He was very good looking, after all…even if it was in a scary way…I found myself getting shivery when I thought about him and that kiss, but I wasn't sure if it was for totally pure reasons anymore.
"Wow. Really? Gaara-sama?"
He looked genuinely surprised, and this surprised me too; Shikamaru usually didn't look anything except sleepy or annoyed.
"Sorry, it's just someone as shy as you, I'd figured…"
He looked like he was about to say something, but then shook his head.
"Never mind. Well if you wanted to talk to him, you better hurry up."
He started to reach into his pocket for something.
"Temari just came to…" For some reason, he seemed to smile, and then it was gone. "…tell me she was leaving."
He then pulled out a half empty pack of cigarettes, and used his mouth to pull one out.
"L-luh-LEAVING??"
It was my fault! She was leaving because Gaara wanted to leave, because he thought I was…because I hadn't…
I was going to explode. That was all there was too it; I was simply too mortified for my body to take it any longer. Gaara, the Kazekage, was leaving Konoha because of me. I had repulsed someone so entirely that they had to leave the village just to get away from me. I was a horrible, pathetic excuse for a kunoichi…no, even for a regular person, I was the apart of the very bottom tier, the dregs on the bottom of humanities teacup…
"Um…Hinata? You okay?"
I had my hands to my cheeks, feeling them burst into flames as I held them.
"Ah! I…I have…I have to c-catch them!"
Shikamaru seemed surprised again; I should get an award for being able to do so twice in one day.
"Catch them? Well, good luck if you have to get to Gaara…from what Temari said, I doubt I'd be in the village still if I were him…"
"SHE TOLD YOU???"
I exploded.
…okay not really. But I came as close as humanly possible. I had turned right into a cloud of smoke; he had lit his cigarette while I had been in my own worry world. It was a horrible smell, burning, like something alive getting thrown into a fireplace…
"Ugh! W-when did you start smoking?"
Oh no that doesn't matter! Hinata, find Gaara! Stop him from leaving on your account or you'll never live it down!
"Uh…well, Asuma always—
"THAT DOESN'T MATTER!" I yelled at Shikamaru when he started to answer, who looked totally confused (poor guy).
I ran out the building as fast as I could, activating my Byakugan as I did so. Gaara Gaara Gaara where are you where are you…
As I searched the town, my mind went crazy thinking about the things that I was sure were going to happen if I wasn't in time.
"Hiashi-sama, your daughter single-handedly ruined all of Konoha's relation's with Sunaga."
"What, Hinata? That good for nothing daughter of mine! Let us shoot her!"
"Yay! Now I'm the Hyuuga Heir!"
And Neji would throw a party and everyone would come except me. Because I'm dead. The end.
"There!"
I spotted him! I would be spared the bullet! He was almost at the outskirts of town, but the night crowd was slowing him down…I couldn't help but notice the fact that my byakugan was getting better, as I could even make out the love kanji on his forehead. And his brilliant fire like red hair. And his smouldering emeralds for eyes—
AHH what's wrong with me today??
I sensed Kiba too, he was running after me (even though I told him I'd be fine by myself, grr). But I was a bit relieved he was coming with me, even if it was because he was going against what I had told him earlier…if I ended up doing something really bad, at least someone who was on my side would be around…not to mention the fact that I was breaking my promise to stay away from Gaara, anyway.
"Kiba-kun, I know you're there." I said to the open air as it whizzed by, and soon he was running next to me on the rooftops. I half expected him to stop me, glare at me with those wild eyes and tell me exactly why what I was doing was crazy and selfish and stupid. But he didn't.
He just sent a cautious glance my way, and then fell into the background, still trailing me.
"Do what you need to do. I won't be far behind if you need me." I heard him say, grudgingly letting me do what I wanted.
I smiled inwardly, thanking him in my heart. He was such a good friend…loyal and brave, like the dogs his family raises (its more of a compliment than it sounds, believe me ;).
OK, Gaara-sama, prepare to be apologiz-ized!
(I hope you don't kill me!)
Gaara
Bloodlust. I could feel it in the air; the gentle prickling of angry chakra vibrated against my skin and told me it was close. Someone was murderously angry. It put me on edge, since I hadn't been in a good fight in a while, there was something attractive about the feeling of an imminent battle. But this was not the place nor the time; I was in a town with a ninja population, and a brawl that broke out here could easily turn into a bloodbath…especially if I got involved.
But where was it coming from? I wasn't quite sure; all I knew was it was close, because I couldn't tell the general direction, so I assumed it must be in my general vicinity. I scanned the crowd with my eyes, trying to locate the source as soon as possible so I could move away. Shukaku was beginning to notice as well, and I didn't want to have to deal with him anymore than I had to today. One slip-up had been enough…
Then I saw something that made my blood run cold. A little bobbing head, with plum colored hair, making its way through the crowd, in my direction. I could catch the faintest trace of that scent in the air, and I decided it was time to leave. Maybe I would get lucky. Maybe she hadn't seen me yet. Or better, she had seen me, and was running away in the opposite direction. Maybe—
"G-Gaara-sama!"
Well, shit.
She was chasing me. She was actually trying to talk to me…
"G-gaara…I mean…Kazekage-sama…about the…I wanted to …" Her voice was tiny and tinkling even when she tried to yell above the din of the crowd. Damn it woman! Can't you see I'm trying to get away from you?? Can't you see I'm…
…not…moving? Why am I not moving?!
Let's hear what she wants to say, yeah? A gravelly voice tells me, condescendingly, as if I have a choice.
I hate you.
Don't be such a baby.
"…A-Apologize!"
Her voice brought me back out of my introverted conversation, and I found myself staring right into those white pearls once again. She wanted to apologize? For what?
She then bowed, something I hadn't expected at all.
"Ah…for…for being so…so foolish and…and not…"
Why she wanted to apologize for something that was obviously my own fault, I didn't have any time to care about. All I knew was that she was sure going to take her time doing it; time that was better spent with me putting as much distance between myself and her as possible.
"I…well, you…ahh…"
"Are you here by yourself?" I interrupted her mid-sentence. It was vital to her livelihood that she wasn't, so I prayed the answer wasn't 'no'. She looked up, surprised that I had spoken, I guess. Or perhaps it was my impatient tone; I was getting rather…anxious. As was my demon counterpart…
"N-no…Kiba-kun is over there…"
I sent a cursory glance towards the area she had indicated, and met "Kiba's" angry glare. So that was where the bloodlust was coming from; he wasn't concealing it very well, and probably even meant for me to notice it. His dog was snarling at me too, but keeping its distance, as if it instinctively knew I had an animal friend of my own close by. I almost sneered; don't you touch her, was what he was probably trying to tell me with that glare. She must have told him to stay behind.
I exhaled, letting pent up worry flow out. As much as it would annoy me to have dog-boy monitor my every move, it was somehow a relief to know I was being watched. It would be far easier to control myself knowing there was someone else around keeping tabs on her.
"Good." I said, mostly to myself. Then I turned my attention to her.
"I'm going to be very honest with you, Hyuuga-sama."
I must have been glaring at her, because I could see visible fear in those milky white eyes.
"If I ever catch you alone…I'll probably do something awful to you." I paused for effect. "I might even kill you." I added, as an afterthought. The scarier I was to her, the better. It seemed to work, as she visibly recoiled from me.
"So it is in your best interest to stay away from me. I don't want you following me around anymore."
I stepped closer, making sure I was looking down at her so she got the full affect of my glare.
"Do you understand?"
Stepping closer had been a mistake; her smell was intoxicating. My vision blurred for an instant, but the bloodlust emanating off of the dog boy helped me keep my composure. It reminded me that people were watching; that there would be massive repercussions in store for me if I let myself slip. But there was still a look of pure horror on her face…Hinata didn't know how much safer she was with him around.
"…I…ahh…" Her voice was soft and delicate, almost too low for me to hear. Her dark plum hair danced in the wind and washed her scent all over me; being this close for too long wasn't good.
"I SAID do you understand??"
She looked up at me now, seeming conflicted for some reason.
Just tell me you understand, damn it.
"…You're…dangerous." She said after what seemed like an eternity, looking downward; as if it wasn't so blatantly obvious that she needed to say it aloud. Well, good. You get it. Have a cookie.
"…b-but…"
There is a 'but'?
"…but…" Her inner conflict seemed to turn into resolve, and she looked up to meet my glare, with a scared yet somehow defiant look in her eyes. "…you're not…bad."
Someone was laughing inside of me.
…and then everything was suddenly quiet in my little world. The laughter faded away. And in my mind, there's never a quiet moment.
Sometimes the noise is me thinking, sometimes it's Shukaku, sometimes it's both, but in here, its never so silent…never this quiet. For a second I was mesmerized by it, I felt strangely out of place inside my own body.
"…N-no…I don't th-think…that you're bad." Her voice broke the void for an instant, like a single melodic chord echoing in my mind.
I don't know what it was about those words that compelled me to stare at her. I took a good look at her, and I realized it was the first time I'd really seen her. The whole time I'd been trying to get away from her, I'd been preoccupied by other thoughts that didn't belong to my own mind…but right now, for reasons that escaped me, that part of me was dead silent.
"…You're a fool." I said to her, as I studied her child like face.
Embarrassed now, and blushing, her wonderful blood bloomed on her cheeks. Those eyes weren't just white, they held many strange colors, like oil on water (as un-appealing as that sounds, its what they most resembled). Her hair had so many dark hues it seemed to shimmer even in the dim streetlights. She said something, I saw her lips move. Four syllables, her mouth molded out her words, but my world was silent. A lock of that dark hair swept onto her face, and before I knew what I was doing, I brushed it away with my hand. I let it linger there, against that pale translucent skin where bloody roses bloomed…
I hadn't noticed the moment her scent became too overwhelming for me to handle, and made me grip her shoulders…
…The noise returned. The footsteps of the crowd, the bark of that dog, her heart beat and my own, and I woke up. I stopped myself, just before I could touch her lips. A sharp gasp of air left her mouth and brushed against my own. The urge to grab something other than her shoulders was almost unbearable, but I fought it with everything I had.
…so close… XO
He was right for once. It had been, too close…
"…And…you're wrong." I said to her (and to myself) before releasing her. Or, more accurately, pushing her away.
"I'll definitely kill you if I see you again."
Hopefully, she believed it. I was starting to believe it, if only so I could avoid doing what I thought Shukaku wanted…
Hinata
Gaara-sama, I'm sorry I was foolish. I should have noticed…
I called out to him, trying to sound braver and more confident than I felt.
Gaara-sama, it was totally my fault, please don't leave.
He seemed to hear me, and he looked like he was extra-mad…His eyes were wide open, with a kind of crazy-mad stare that I had seen only in cheesy yakuza movies. But I was still kind of…I don't know, I guess relieved or happy or anxious or some weird combination of the three to see him.
Gaara-sama, Please don't tell my father, I have a feeling he's going to shoot me.
But he stopped walking away. That meant he wanted to talk, right? Or at least, he would listen to me, right? Or maybe it was a trap…ahh don't loose your resolve, Hinata!
"Ah…I'm s-sorry…for…for being so…so foolish and…and not…"
He interrupted me mid sentence and sent me the scariest glare in the world (it really was, I think he patented it or something).
"Are you here by yourself?"
Gaarasamaimsorrybecauseflakjfuhdofisodjfoisjd
His voice was strained and angry, like it had been the last time, and my carefully planned out apology became mush in my head. Those intense green eyes seemed dark with an emotion even my byakugan couldn't discern, but it was something close to anger…and maybe…restraint of some kind. Whatever it was made him seem very unstable to me.
"Umm…No…Kiba-kun is over there…"
I motioned to the place behind me I imagined he would be, expecting Gaara's eyes to flame with rage. Let your friend follow you, huh? Well then I guess I have to go to the trouble of glaring at you both with my patented death stare! Rawr! (Does Gaara roar? He seems like the type that…actually, no he doesn't…but he did growl that one time…).
But that's not what happened at all. His shoulders relaxed considerably, and he seemed to be almost relieved that Kiba was glaring at him from behind my back.
"Good." He sounded like he meant that, too. The way his face seemed to grow softer for that instant gave me shivers again (as in the good kind of shivers, the ones I'm totally not supposed to have for anyone except...well…), but they were gone as soon as he looked at me again.
"I'm going to be very honest with you, Hyuuga-sama."
His voice was lovely too, smooth and deep, but it gave me shivers for a whole other reason. It was quiet and somehow dense, like there was something unpleasant lurking beneath it. To be quite honest, it scared me. A lot.
"You're probably wondering why I asked you if you were alone."
I was actually more preoccupied with praying that I wasn't about to be shot today, but now that I thought about it, it was rather odd.
"It's because I don't trust myself to be alone with you. And you shouldn't either."
There was something ominous and dark about the way he said it that made me believe it. I gulped.
"If I ever catch you alone…"
He paused, an emotion resembling shame flashed across his face, and then was quickly replaced with resolve.
"…I'll probably do something awful to you."
Everything fell away from me at that moment; it was just me and Gaara, in our own little dark world. I prayed my legs weren't shaking, and that I looked braver than I felt.
"I might even kill you."
I should have been running away the instant I heard that. I don't know why I didn't; maybe it was one of those things where I couldn't move my legs because I was so scared.
"So it is in your best interest to stay away from me. I don't want you following me around anymore."
Gaara stepped forward, and instantly grew like, a foot taller. His head blocked what little light we were getting from the street lamp, and the darkness created an immediate effect on his appearance. His dark red hair looked black in the absence of light, and Gaara's bright green eyes were the only things I could see very clearly. A pair of gleaming eyes looking out at you from the darkness? It was something from a scary children's story. Only it was real, and it was right in front of me.
"Do you understand?" His voice was a harsh whisper, his tone rough and no longer as polite as it had once been.
"I…ah…"I wanted to say, 'I understand'. I always want to say things. I just never can…because I know the second I say so, he's going to walk away from me and probably never come back. And some part of me I guess didn't want that to happen. Is it because I'm ashamed? No, no…its because of those eyes.
"I SAID do you understand?"
Those eyes…that look so much like mine. Eyes that reflect shame and perhaps even fear in the deepest darkest depths of their pupils, the eyes of someone who wants to change so badly…but feels they can't.
"You're…dangerous." I said something that would probably please him enough not to yell at me again, but I didn't feel quite so…right when I said it.
He looked like he was happy with it, and his glare softened.
There were a few things I knew for sure. One was there was some part of Gaara that really wanted to hurt me.
"…b-but…"
Another was that he scared me worse than anything I'd ever known.
"…but…"
One more was…that there was another part of him that didn't want to hurt me, and in fact was probably trying to protect me by telling me to stay away. And that part of him reminded me of myself somehow.
"…You're not…bad. N-no…I don't th-think…that you're bad."
I think I had somewhere along the line passed the point of being too scared to care, and I felt almost confident when I said it. I could imagine how all his life, he must have been told how dangerous and evil he was, just like how I'd always been called a pathetic failure.
And how great it had felt the day someone had stood up for me and told me I wasn't a failure. That he felt I could change…I had thanked him in my heart that day. Maybe Gaara—
"You're a fool."
…nevermind.
But something was different now. His eyes weren't glaring at me anymore, no…now there seemed to something softer, even childlike about them. His eyes narrowed, but not in anger; it was to study me. A childlike curiosity…it seemed very out of place in Gaara's eyes, and made me very uneasy. I could feel my heart beat faster under such scrutiny, and I could feel my cheeks start to burn. Why was he looking at me that way? He'd called me a fool; was it because he'd never met anyone so stupid? Now studying the Stupidus Hinatus, quite a rare species of idiot…
A breeze sent my long hair up over my shoulders and into my face; I should really get it cut soon. I sent up a hand to pull my hair-curtains out of my face, but I felt Gaara do it for me. I felt his hand sort of brush against my skin before it fell away, almost…fondly?
Then he had me again, and then his face was close to mine, and I was so surprised I almost screamed, but all that came out was a small burst of surprised air. I was a helpless little doll compared to the strong arms that were holding me…
"…and you're wrong." He said quietly, right into my face, so only I could hear him. He let me go, and then walked away.
I was frozen in place for a good minute or so, absolutely shaken. He had had me so completely, he could have…I shivered, and this time I wasn't sure whether it was because the thought scared me to death or excited me in some perverse way. But I knew it was only a warning meant for me to take his threat seriously. That I had been a fool, and he was bad, and he was dangerous, and if he had wanted to, he could have killed me.
But maybe it was because I was still such a fool that I didn't quite buy it. If he had been so evil, would he have warned me? Well maybe he was holding back for the sake of his country, but…
Well it didn't matter much anymore, I reminded myself. He was leaving today, and I'd probably never see him again. Something in me felt a little broken over this, but I let it fade.
Gaara
I glided away, Shukaku whining like a kid wanting candy the whole time. The only thing that was keeping me from breaking down was the pressure of dog-boy's eyes on me and the crowd, and the dangling hope that I would soon be far, far away from this crazy village.
Far away from her, and her smell…her face was etched into my mind now. Involuntarily, I found myself breathing in deeply, trying to make one last memory of her scent…
But there was only burning instead. I found that I welcomed it this time thought, knowing that Temari had probably somehow or other picked up her burning smell again. Good; I could get her, we could go, this could all be far behind me before I had a chance to get too riled up…
…I sometimes look back to this moment and wonder if it had been Temari who turned the corner. It would have saved me a lot of grief, that's for sure.
But it wasn't Temari who I met leaving Konoha.
"…Gaara-sama?"
It was the Shadow user who had fought (and technically beaten) Temari in the Chuunin exam two years back. His name eluded me…something-maru, was it?
"Oi. Hinata-sama and Temari are looking for you."
He had a cigarette in his mouth. No wonder I had thought he was Temari, he smelled just like the way she did after Chuunin meetings. Just the way she did. Like the smell had sunk into her clothes, it even lingered on her breath—
…Wait.