DISCLAIMER: Not mine.

Chapter 6

Monday, around 5 PM

The clock on the wall showed 5 PM. Rory collected her things, and with one last glance at her desk to check if she'd left something there she left the office. The day turned out better than she had expected. She had dreaded meeting Logan, but it wasn't all that bad. They weren't on the same page yet, but there was a chance that they would be in the not too distant future. That was enough for her. She stood in the elevator her thoughts racing. She didn't know what to expect, what would be waiting for her in front of the building. She wasn't sure if her last words were intended to be a hint or a clue, and she wasn't sure what Logan thought what her words meant. Will Logan be there? If yes, what would he do? And she? Well, two more stories, and she would find out.

Exiting the building she waved good bye to the doorman, and noticed Logan a few feet away. Without a word or a nod she headed to the preschool.

Logan spotted her the very moment she stepped out to the street as well, but he did nothing to approach her. She started to walk away, but he just waited. Waited long enough to give her a head start, but not too long so he would lose the sight of her. He now followed her lead to see his daughter. He felt a little bit stalker-ish but he didn't mind. He didn't have any other choice. He didn't know which preschool Ella attended, and it didn't feel right for him to ask somebody, even though he knew for sure that any one of his friends could have told him. Hell, even his father could have told him! He had to find out, and he was going to find out in a very entertaining way.

Rory felt his presence without glancing back, and a small smile was playing on her lips as she walked. This was going to work. She wished he would be patient enough, and didn't want to get her hopes up for a reason. There was a big difference between the two of them. He couldn't take his time and it was a first-hand experience for her. As soon as he realized he loved her after their first break up, he went to her, and he expected her to take him back immediately just because he admitted he loved her. Or there was the 'bridesmaids incident' which taught them that nothing good can come out from Rory not taking her time. But did Logan really learn that lesson back then? He was himself after all. When he had set up his mind there was no way stopping him. He always chose the shortest way to reach his aim. He always wanted things for yesterday. But it wasn't working on her when it came to their relationship. She wasn't like the on-off switch but more like a dimmer switch. She was the one who needed time to adjust to the new situation. The question was was he willing to accommodate and go at her pace? Rory felt in her guts that it was an open question. It would have been good to say that it was for him to know and for her to find out, but she felt that in reality it was rather 'to find out' for both of them. Only time would answer that.

After a good ten minutes walk she reached her destination. Logan watched her from a distance as she entered the building. He scribbled down the name and the address of the school while he was waiting for the two girls. He wanted to make sure he found his way back. Five minutes later Rory left the preschool with a little girl from the pictures he'd seen on her side. She sent him a small smile, and then just turned to Ella, who was animatedly telling a story to her mother. Logan followed them, but he wasn't close enough to hear what the conversation was about. He followed them to an apartment building, and watched them entering as Rory glanced back and gave him a small smile. Logan caught a cab to go home, and decided that he would wait for Rory the next day too.

Rory wanted to talk to Ella about her father; she just didn't have any idea how to do it. It was a touchy subject. Just telling her that her daddy was back from London and now he wanted a place in their lives sounded lame so she gave herself one more day. She wasn't the procrastinating type, but there's a first for everything as Logan would say. So the evening was just another Monday evening.

--

Next day she was a little bit surprised when she found Logan waiting for her in front of her office building, but it was a good surprise nonetheless. She knew that he'd set his mind on getting to know them, but it had been over five years since the last time she had seen the determined Logan, hence was the slight surprise. She recovered quite quickly, and the events of the previous day recurred again: Logan followed her, waited for them to exit the school, and then started to follow them again. Rory glanced back, and she decided to give him a snippet, so she slowed down, so Logan would near them and asked her daughter "Hey, kiddo, do you want to go to the park for a half hour before we go home?" Logan couldn't help but smile at her action, and waited her daughter's answer. Yes, it was just a snippet, but an important snippet nonetheless.

"Do you even have to ask?" said Ella smiling. With that said they turned towards the park. Ella reached the playground first. She got rid of her backpack, and headed to the swings. Rory collected the Hello Kitty bag and followed her daughter. Logan watched them from a bench: the girl and her mother in awe, flying on a swing and laughing. It seemed they lived in another world. In a pink bubble which protected them from everything bad. He was looking for these kinds of memories in his mind, but there were only a few of them. Like the first time he went to Mitchum's office with his father.

Mitchum Huntzberger stepped out of the elevator. The newsroom fell silent. They were watching the almighty CEO walking into his office holding a six-year-old messy blonde haired boy's hand who was wearing very business-like dark blue pants with white shirt and a matching dark blue vest. He looked like a casually dressed businessman in miniature. He wore a serious expression on his face. He was determined to do everything right. He wanted to please his father so much. During the day he was like his father's shadow. They did everything together and people were 'ooohing' and 'aahhing' as the little boy tried to mime his father or say what he thought his father would want to hear. Everybody said he was an extraordinary kid. That day he had lunch with Mitchum, and he had his usual post-lunch nap in his father's office on the big leather couch. Everything was new for him. The huge building, the magical world where his father did all those very important things. He was used to people doing what his father told them, he saw that in his whole life, but that was something else. Something so much more. Walking with his father he felt he was bulletproof. That nothing could go wrong. His father had a solution for every problem.

That day was special in Logan's life. He enjoyed the flurry in the afternoon when people were working on the next day's edition. He enjoyed every moment. Back then he didn't sense the fear in the air, and didn't notice the sycophants. If somebody had asked he would have said that being at the newspaper was more exciting than Disneyland. That was before he became a 'disappointment', a 'worthless spoiled rich kid'; before everything he did showed that he was 'irresponsible' and 'careless'. Back then he liked to sneak into his father's office after dinner, past his bedtime, and just sit there in silence watching Mitchum as he worked, listening to his conversations on the phone. He could sit there for hours, and Mitchum didn't mind. They had the same mischievous glint in their eyes. Sometimes he fell asleep in the big armchair. That was special, because when Mitchum noticed that his son was sleeping he stood up and carried him to his bed and tucked him in. When Logan felt his father's arms lifting him he usually woke up, but soon he felt himself in a magical place that is the border of dream and wakefulness, where everything is possible.

Logan wished that those days could come back. He didn't notice the lapse of time, but looked up as he felt someone's eyes on him. His eyes met two pairs of blue eyes. Now he was confused. What were they doing there? They just weren't supposed to be standing in front of him. Rory said she wanted to take her time. He had agreed. And yet they were standing right in front of him and they were speaking to him, but he had yet to come out of his own world to actually hear what they were saying. He knew he had a puzzled look on his face, but he could not have changed it if his life depended on it. So he did the only thing that seemed logical and forced himself to listen to whatever the girl had to say.

Rory felt like someone was playing some kind of cruel game with her. The plan was good. Logan followed them, even to the park, and he sat down on a bench near them, but didn't go closer. He acted exactly like she hoped he would act. He watched them, Ella was happy, Rory was happy. But time came to go home, and Ella's bracelet she made that day at school was nowhere to be found. Apparently it was under the bench Logan was sitting on. It fell off as she got rid of her backpack in a hurry. When Rory spotted the bracelet she headed to Logan, but she wasn't fast enough. Since he was so deep in his thoughts she couldn't get his attention so Ella followed her, and there was nothing she could do to keep her daughter from speaking when Ella spotted her bracelet under the bench Logan was sitting on.

"Excuse me, sir, would you mind standing up so I can get my bracelet from under the bench you are sitting on?" Did that just come out of a four-year-old's mouth? He stood there speechless for a second.

"Sure, but better yet: let me get it for you," said Logan while he stood up and bent down for the bracelet. Handing it her he added, "Here you are, miss."

Ella giggled, it was funny being called 'miss', but she also hid behind Rory's legs, and she stretched out her hand for the bracelet from the place she safely occupied. She had manners, but she was her mother's daughter and he was a stranger after all. Rory and Ella said, "thank you," and they headed home. Rory knew she had to talk to Ella about her father, and she had to do that soon. Procrastination just came back to kick her butt and it had very strong legs.

When they left, Logan sat back on the bench and stayed there for like thirty more minutes thinking about what had just happened. His daughter was one of a kind, nobody could deny that. She was beautiful, and her language... he didn't speak often with four-year-olds, but he could tell the way his daughter spoke was not average.

Rory and Ella arrived home, had dinner, and when Ella was about to start their evening ritual Rory stopped her. Holding the little girl in her arms she said, "Do you remember when you last time asked about your daddy?"

"Yes."

"And do you remember my answer?"

"You told me he worked in London. Grandpa Mitchum said that too. He told me stories about daddy when he was a little boy too. He said I take after him in some ways."

"Rrrright. Now if you would have a chance to meet your daddy, would you like to meet him?" Rory asked her daughter.

"Are we going to London?" Rory shook her had smiling.

"No. We are staying here. But your daddy is finished with his job in London, and he's home. So, what do you say? Do you want to meet him?"

"I don't know. Would he want to meet me?"

"He'd be a fool if he didn't want to." Rory said sincerely.

"Is he like Grandpa Mitchum?" Rory could barely hold her laugh. She understood Ella's question. The girl liked Mitchum, and being like him was a good point in Ella's eyes, but Rory imagined Logan's face if he heard that she asked if he was like his father...

"Yes, in some ways."

"Why did he work in London? Gavin's daddy works in New York. Shaun's daddy works in New York. Come to think of it, everybody's daddies work in New York..." Ooooh, here we go. Like this wasn't hard enough without Ella's questions. Now what would she answer. She couldn't say "Your daddy got scared when I told him about you, so he just put an ocean between us..." It was the truth, but she knew what it was like to feel like a mistake. Her Hayden grandparents made sure of that. Her daughter wasn't a mistake, and she wouldn't let anybody think of her as a mistake, not even her.

"Not everybody's. There are dads who travel around. Your daddy is one of them. But that doesn't mean that he doesn't care about you, or doesn't love you. Because he does. He knows that he has the greatest daughter in the world, and he's proud of you."

"Now that he's home, will he live with us?" Oh no, not that question... Rory swallowed.

"I don't know."

"But you said he loved me."

"Yes, but sometimes love is just not enough."

"Why?"

"I wish I knew, kiddo, I wish I knew. So what do you say? You want to meet him?"

"Can I just take a look at him first?" Yes, that was her daughter. First came observing. On the first week in the preschool she hardly spoke to anybody. She was just watching the other kids while they were playing, then when she felt she'd seen enough she approached two boys, Gavin and Shaun, and fortunately the boys were just as Ella thought they would be, and the three of them became friends soon after that. From the first time Rory met the boys she had a familiar feeling, but she just couldn't put her finger on the basis. Then a few months later Ella asked her mom if she could invite her friends for a Sunday afternoon movie marathon and Rory agreed. She talked to the boy's parents and they'd let them go. So the next Sunday Steph, Paris, Colin, Finn, the three kids and Rory were watching Toy Story 1 and 2. That was when Rory realized what was so familiar about them. Colin, Finn, Gavin and Shaun occupied the couch, Ella sat on her mother's lap in the big armchair, leaving the love seat for Paris and Steph. The first film was over and the two boys were arguing who would change the disks. Meanwhile Colin and Finn tried to decide who would bring the boys home, and that was when it hit Rory: her daughter had her own Colin and Finn. The mothers watched the boys arguing and they burst out laughing. The resemblance was uncanny.

"Well, technically you've already seen him."

"Really?"

"Uhum. Remember that man in the park today? The one who gave you back your bracelet?"

"He is my daddy?"

"He is your daddy."

"But you two weren't like Gavin's mom and dad..." Yes. Gavin was lucky. His parents loved each other, and never had any problem with showing it.

"I know. But not everybody is like Gavin's parents."

"Do you love my daddy?"

"Of course I love him."

"But you didn't even give him a hug..." God! How do you explain this to a four-year-old???

"You know, I haven't seen him for a while, and now I'm learning how to be close to him again."

"I don't understand."

"Remember, when last year you broke your wrist?"

"Yes, I had to wear a cast, and Uncle Finn drew so many things on it that the doctor had to change it." Well, yes. That's Finn for you.

"And remember how it felt when they finally took it off?" Rory didn't wait for answer, she just went on. "You couldn't move your hand like before. You just had to learn to use it again." Ella nodded, and Rory continued. "Well, your dad's and my relationship broke a few years ago, and now we have to learn how to handle things. It's like getting to know each other again. And that takes time. You know that. You operate the same way, missy." Ella nodded again. She was friendly and chirpy with all those she knew, but letting close someone stranger was not so easy for her. "So... what do you say? Would you be up to some time together on the playground? Just to check how is he with the swing...?"

"Can I just watch him first?"

"Sure. Than I'll invite everybody plus your father, and as we talk, you can just watch. You know there's nothing to be afraid of when your Auntie Paris is around." With that Rory let Ella go to change into her pjs, and grabbed the phone to call everybody about Sunday afternoon in the park. There was nothing strange about an invitation like that- until the guest list part. When she mentioned Logan's name she could hear the unsaid questions that popped into her friends' mind. "Logan? Ella's father Logan? As in 'I leave you because I'm a coward' Logan?" But everybody - even Paris - just said yes. They had to bite their tongues alright, but they knew it was hard enough for Rory without them asking the world's stupidest questions. Yes, it was weird that she invited him to her home after him leaving her, but they figured she did it for Ella's sake. All of them thought she still had feelings for him, or at least she wasn't indifferent when it came to Logan, but they also knew how stubborn she was. If Ella didn't exist, he didn't have a chance to be able to approach her. She wasn't a workout Barbie, but she could run quite fast when she felt like running away. But no matter how much she wanted to run, no matter how hard was it for her, she had a daughter who needed her father, so she stayed.

She was done calling her friends and was about to call Logan when she realized she didn't know his number. She could have gotten it from almost anyone, but she decided she'll just ask in person that is if he shows up at her office the next afternoon.