Title: Carb-Carrying Demon
Rating: K
Disclaimer: This is a derivative work of High School Musical and by its nature transformative. It is not, therefore, a breach of copyright.
Summary: A carb-carrying demon descends on the Evans household. Worse? Ryan welcomes him. Ryan/Zeke
"You," Sharpay hissed in her best voice of unadulterated loathing. "What are you doing here?"
Rather than looking properly chagrinned, Evil Incarnate smiled with a slightly disconcerting vagueness, eyes never quite meeting hers, more focused on craning to look past her into the house, which was far too easy given his ridiculous height. "Hey, Sharpay."
She stomped her foot angrily and snapped, again: "What are you doing here?"
"Oh," he said, vaguely, shifting a little bit, and she saw the foil-covered plate he was holding behind his back.
Her glare grew more fiery. "I warned you not to bring—"
"Zeke!" The voice from behind her interrupted without a second thought, and she turned to glare betrayal at her brother—who wasn't even looking at her. Instead he was rushing forward, eyes only for the Antichrist. "Sorry I wasn't ready!"
Sharpay's eyes widened in shock, then narrowed. "What."
Not even seeming tohear her, Lucifer pulled the plate out from behind his back and presented it to Ryan as a flourish. "Not exactly a bouquet," he admitted. "But I thought maybe you'd like something more from the heart."
Ryan bounced on his toes and pulled back the foil to reveal a layer of perfectly-arranged red, heart-shaped cookies. He smiled delightedly and stood on tiptoe to kiss Satan on the cheek. "That's so sweet," he said, taking one of the cookies and taking a bite. His eyes closed in an overdone expression of rapture, and he finished the cookie, licking a crumb suggestively off his finger while The Archfiend's eyes locked on the move. "God, those are good. What are they?"
"Red velvet cookies," The Devil answered, eyes intent. "They're good?"
"Of course they're good. You made them. You didn't try them?"
"I wanted my first taste to be from you," Lucifer explained, leaning down to drop his lips to Ryan's smiling ones.
"Woah, woah, woah," Sharpay shouted, moving between them, setting a hand on each chest, and pushing. "I don't know what alternate universe you two think this is, but this is not happening. You are my brother Ryan. Your type is dark, yes, but elegant and bright and debonair! Not carb-carrying, jock demons! And you," she said, turning to jab one sharp finger into Beelzebub's chest. "Your type is female. Neither of you should need me to point this out to you. You really should be able to keep track of these things on your own. Do I look like your personal assistant?"
The King of Hell backed down, and looked anxiously at her brother. "You, uh, didn't tell her?"
Ryan rolled his eyes. "Didn't have the chance. Sharpay. Zeke and I are dating. And for what it's worth, I have many types." He grinned and added, "And Zeke has at least two."
It appeared that even the Antichrist could blush.
She looked back and forth between them, Beelzebub looking down embarrassedly and kicking at the ground with one toe. Ryan smiling fondly at him, plate of cookies in one hand, the other wrapping around The Devil's arm then sliding down to twine fingers with him. Sharpay let out a sound of rage that could in no way be mistaken for a squeak, turned on her heel, and left them to their evil devices, plotting how to bring order back to the world.