PART TWOOOOOOO! and last.
Disclaimer: Geez. Can the first one count for all the chapters?
He was perfect. She was lucky the last thing she saw was so beautiful.
When she became pregnant for the third time, Iwao seemed happy. At least, what she had learned to recognize as happiness from him. He was as "happy" as the other two times. She was into her fifth month when Yashamaru came to her. She hadn't seen her brother for quite some time, as his shinobi missions kept him away, and then he would be out with friends. He was closer to them than his own sister. She had to blame herself, though. She isolated herself in the light of Iwao's affection. And then the kids occupied her.
Yashamaru came quietly, at night when the Kazekage had left her alone. She embraced him, inhaling the sweet of sun that he always seemed to radiate. She was so glad for some other person in her life. He seemed unaware that she was so lonely in this house full of cute, energetic kids. His message erased any of that emotion, anyway.
Iwao, he explained as carefully as he could, was planning to use her unborn child as the new host for Shukaku. She may have fainted. All she knew was the next morning, she looked at her sleeping husband in a new light. She asked her heart, unhappily, if it still cared for him. But since she had never really been in love (for one has to be loved back to be in love), her heart could give her only an uncertain answer.
She knew she could not truly love someone planning to curse her baby this way. And yet, how could she know? How could she tell if he was planning this or not? Yashamaru probably just heard gossip. He was overreacting. This calmed her mind. Iwao woke and treated the day like another. He kissed her goodbye, patted her stomach and ruffled the kids' hair. He was the same, the same as always. How could he hurt something so innocent and gentle?
And then she remembered that he'd hit her. Hurt her.
She began to fear the safety of her children, born or not. And yet, watching them with him, she felt as though they truly belonged to him, like she was not a mother but a ghost. She cared for them, changed them and fed them and cleaned up after them, and they loved him.
She tried to lose that resent, but it gnawed at her psyche, like a poison. She could see, obviously, why someone might love him, but she could not see why no one seemed to love her. And then, at the end of her eighth month, he sat her down.
He would be using the little baby in her, he said seriously, as a host. The village was poor. They needed power. They needed this, and that.........and she screamed at him. How? She fell into a void so complete, her body was about ripped apart by her sorrow. Her tears did not move him. He slapped her across the face - and she spat at him something about not harming the baby, and how that was SO responsible of him, not going for a kick. He went to bed, and she let the shuddders fill her. When the cries were quiet, and her body was once again under control, she stood.
She packed things. She looked at her sleeping children, as of yet unaware of her torture. She kissed them goodbye, and they smiled in their sleep. She had no tears left for them, however. She couldn't feel anything. Not even leaving them behind. She knew they would be strong.
And she left.[1]
The sands were strong, as though it was following the Kazekage's orders to keep her in. But she trudged through, silently apologizing to the baby battered in her belly. It was a cool night, perfect weather for someone who had no shinobi experience in the desert. She would've died during the day, but as it was, midnight comforted her steps. If the sands were to keep her, the sky was to free her.
She was almost at the break of the Land of Wind when fate betrayed her. Her water broke. Why? she shrieked at the sky, for what was she to do now? She sat, and could do nothing. Her baby........she was letting him down. The contractions rocked through her as the dawn enveloped her, trying to still the spasmatic pains.
She was lying, shaking, when they found her. She was back so much faster than she had taken to leave. They were carrying her in a stretcher, as the clouds watched her and the winds caressed her, breathing on her as to cool the hot pain of labour.
The sun was shining, as it did in the desert. The sun was shining when her world faded into monotone colours and blurred movement. Was that Yashamaru? Iwao? So many people. All she could feel was the pain, and then...release. She saw him, and then, closing her eyes, she saw blue skies, and sunlight. His face, his perfect little visage, floated in that sky, above her. Her mouth moved. Did they hear her?
"Gaara..." she breathed, anger and hurt on every syllable. "My son....save Sunagakure....this wretched place....save yourself. Love is not.....real. You are...Gaara[2]. This place does not deserve....the life it stole from you."
Later she would be quoted as cursing Sunagakure, and hoping her son would avenge her. This was not true. All she wanted him to know was that the village had betrayed her, and taken his life before it was lived. She wanted him to know it wasn't right. Let him know she loved him, even for that brief space in time where their eyes met.
[1] - i dont think she actually left. but since we dont know anything about her, i thought i'd throw it in.
[2] - Gaara means like "a demon who loves only himself" or something, so she'd be saying he should love only himself to save the pain she felt by loving and not having that love returned. (she loved Iwao, her kids, the village.....)