Ch.10 Crazy Uncle Orion
The Marauders had everything planed. During study hall they where going to take the invisibility cloak and rummage through Professor Patterson's house or at lest look around or something.
"Okay. Every one got it all?" James asked having just gone over the plan one more time.
"Yes, yes Prongsie we got it all we all huddle under the cloak and look in on the windows if Mrs. Patterson is there. We just observe from the window if not we go through their stuff. Right we got it okay." Sirius said frustrated going over such a simple plan so many times just seemed like over kill to him.
"Paddy…settle" James said as he did the best impersonation of his own father that he could muster.
"Hey guys where's Peter?" Lily asked
"I don't know he's been acting weird lately and is always running off" Remus replied
"I think it's hormones or some thing. I think our dear little chubby boy has finally hit puberty" Sirius Joked it would have been funnier if it weren't so true.
They all got under the cloak and stared heading down the trail that lead to Hogsmeade.
"Is that the house?" James whispered as they approached a brick house covered in Ivy.
"Yeah I think that's it I don't remember that being there last year" Remus said
They gathered around a window that was on ground level. They saw what looked like a kitchen and a Red headed woman with her back to them fixing tea over the stove.
"Patterson's wife?" Sirius asked
"I guess so" James said
Then a man with shoulder length dark hair and a goatee walked in to the kitchen and sat down at the table and then the woman asked him something and then they started laughing after he said something funny. Then she proceeded to strain the tea with her back to the window. What ever their relationship they looked pretty chummy with one another.
Then Lily gasped
"What, what is it?" James whispered
"Merlin…Professor Patterson's wife is cheating on him" She said alarmed.
"I don't think we should jump to that conclusion maybe he's just visiting." Remus said
"Yeah visiting her vagina" Sirius remarked. Lily stomped on his foot. "Oi!"
"Shut it you"
"Hey Moony when's the first Hogsmeade weekend?"
"Seventh years get every weekend Prongs…remember?"
"Oh yeah, I forgot"
"Why is that important right now?"
"We'll wait till Monday and then we'll ask him who that guy is that way we can say we saw him coming out of his house or something and if he doesn't know than he'll figure it out on his own alright?" James said
"That's a good plan"
"Yeah"
"Sounds good to me"
"Till then, Lily-Flower? Would you like to come with me wile we're here Saturday"
"Not very Romanic if we're only here so our little lie will hold up"
"Come on I'll take you to that frilly man killing Tea Shop all you girls like"
"Alright I'll go. if anything I can at lest watch you squirm."
"Sweet"
"Hey, you guys think I should grow a goatee like that guy had in there?" Sirius mused.
"Hahaha. I can see it now it would be all patchy. Hahaha. Do it dare you!" Remus laughed
"You're not aloud any way, the student dress code doesn't allow male students to grow out any type of facial hair. It's considered untidy looking on boys so young." Lily said
"Hey I'm all man my dear Lily-flower"
"All right Sirius, then prove it." Sirius opened his mouth but was quickly cut off by Lily "and don't just list the names of girls you shagged that doesn't make you a man just a pervert" Sirius then took on a look of defeat then a look like he just had a stroke of genius.
"I'll tell you what Moony and Lily-flower. I'll prove to Lily that I am all man by growing a goatee after graduation and since you, Moony are so convinced that I can't you have to attest try to grow a mustache"
Remus rolled his eyes "fine whatever" he sighed
"How would that…" Lily stared but James cut her off by whispering in her ear "He's an idiot. Just humor him or he'll think of something to prove his manliness that will get him expelled or something."
"We should get back we'll be late for charms." Lily said.
The Next Monday
The marauders approached their teacher after class "Um…prof…" that earned James a sharp look "I mean Harry can we ask you something?"
"Of course you can"
"We'll this weekend in Hogsmeade we saw this guy hanging around your house…and well we where wondering who he was? You know just because we're extra nosy like that"
Harry looked thoughtful for a moment he was really just stalling for time because in his head he was thinking 'Crap! Got to make something up fast! Oh carp oh carp oh crap! Got it!'
"Older guy dark hair and a goatee?" he asked
"Yeah that's him"
"Oh that's my…a…uncle Orion! Yeah good old uncle Orion"
"Your uncle Orion?" Sirius asked skeptically
"Yes he's an indigent family member. My wife and I look after him"
"Indigent family member? What's that mean?"
"It's a polite way of saying that he's touched in the head and can't take care of him self"
"He didn't seem very crazy when we saw him"
"Well he's not a dangerous psychopath just a bit south of eccentric has a tendency to wonder off you know that old chestnut"
The Marauders absorbed the information it seemed plausible but there had to have been something that their professor was leaving out they knew it but how where they to call him on it when wasn't any of their business first place? They deiced to leave it for now and just go on their way. Plenty more spying was defiantly in order.