I don't own

Chapter 5-Deceptive little bugger

**April 2005**

Mi ke and I had be married 4 years. Things were going great, or so they seemed to the outside looking int. Being that Mike lived, worked and went to school in Port Angeles we had decided that I would move into his apartment when we got married. I hadn't really seen the boys too much in the last couple of years, last I heard Emmet was still doing his thing in Minnesota, Jasper was being groomed to take over the company in two years when he turned 28 and Edward. ..well Edward was the toughest for me to let go. Mike would get pissed when he found out I had emailed or talked to any of the boys on the phone.

My self worth..ah well it was shit. They say that being mentally and emotionally abused is just as worse as physical, I never understood how that would be possible until I experienced it. I was told I was stupid, and idiot, didn't think at all before I acted, was dumb, stupid and and all around whore and then he turned around and told me I was lousy in bed just because he had nave ONCE in 4 years given me an orgasm (and some how that's my fault) with his dick and could barly find the time to use his hand for anything but jacking off 2-3 times a day (on top of sex) he never hit me not once, but he could make me feel like the smallest piece of shit on his shoe…and damn he was good at it. And Dammit if I didn't protect him, by portraying the perfect married life to anyone that would listen. Its how I survived, if I made myself believe that I was happy, then I was happy right? That's how it works.

I came home from school one night and noticed that he had left the , popped on because I wanted to check my email and noticed that a chat window was up, I guess when I bumped the computer it became active again. I saw.

Jessica86: "Hey baby, are you back already?"

Babyblues81: "Umm, i'm not sure who you are talking to."

Jessica86: "Mike, what are you doing, stop playing around, I know it's you."

Babyblues81: "Actually it's not Mike, my name is Bella."

Jessica86: "Oh hi Bella, your Mikes roommate right?"

So I decided I would see what the hell was actually going on.

Babyblues81: Umm..i actually thought we were a little more than roommates."

Jessica86: Oh yeah Mike told me about that, I'm totally cool with it. I mean friends with benefits, that's always a good thing right?" He's actually coming out to see me next month, he wanted to make sure that I knew about you just incase you answered the phone when I called it wouldn't be weird."

Babyblues81: "Jessica can I ask you something? I'm assuming it is your name, very original by the way."

Babyblues81: "Do you Mikes last name? "

Jessica86: "Umm…he said Newton I believe."

Babyblues81: "Ok so now let me tell you mine. It's Newton also."

Jessica86: "Oh you guys are brother and sister..eww with benefits..that's not right."

Babyblues81: "Jessica I am his wife, not his sister."

Jessica86: "Oh"

===Jessica86 logges off==

I proceeded to print a copy of the conversation that I just had with one Jessica 88 (which I might add is currently 17 years old to my husbands 24) I was angry, hurt, betrayed, guilty..WAIT what the hell was I feeling guilty for? I guess I could have paid him more attention I mean when I get home from work I clean, do laundry and then make dinner, by the time I'm done going over my casework for work at night it's 9 or 10 at night and I'm exhausted, but I should still make time for him…oh how I loved faking it.

Twenty-Three minutes later I heard Mikes car out in the drive-way. "Hey babe, I'm home, what's for dinner." He called. The only thing I did was walk into the kitchen and thrust the transcript at him and yelled, "Friends with benefits, I'm your fucking wife." I was hurt, God I was hurt, and then the tears came. I don't cry when I'm sad or happy I cry when I'm pissed, I mean beyond fucking pissed almost to the blacking out stage. Mike looked at me. "Baby, what are you talking about, she was just playing with you, she works with me and she's 24 not 17." "There is nothing going on between us, I wouldn't do that to you. " "You always said one thing to me." "If your going to cheat on me please leave me and divorce me before you do that." That's all you've ever asked Bella. I'm right here with you, I'm not leaving you, therefore I'm not cheating on you." And with that, I knew I didn't believe him, but I wanted to go back to living life in my own little bubble.

**October 2005**

10/14/05- 2 days until Boss's Day. I turned around and looked at my unit. Ok guys lets pull the fun-fund together and see how much money we can get to buy Carmen (our boss) & Tanya (our lead worker) boss' day flowers. They were both great, they took their time when they were training new employees and were very, very patient with them. I just couldn't see working for two more perfect people, I knew them mostly by reputation. I had worked for the State of Washington in the Port Angeles office since I was hired in 2001. But due to the dwindling number of employees (thanks to the lay-offs and the inability to have enough money to hire more people) we were switched around in offices. I was moved to Forks along and two other employees were in the same boat I was; Rosalie moved from the Olympia office and Alice who was moved from the Seattle office. My unit didn't seem to want to listen, lauren looked over at me and said "why would I want to waste my money on dead vegetation for people I could give to shits about." I was stunned. Lauren looked at me again and said. "My job is to come to work, do my work and go home, anything else is not in my job description."

I looked at everyone else. "well is that how you all feel." I asked. I saw many heads shake no. I saw a few of Laurens followers shake yes. " "Well let me put it to you this way, I will have a box sitting on my desk that you can drop money into if you want to or not on your own time." "I will be going and getting beautiful arrangements of flowers for both Carmen and Tanya that will be delivered on the 16th, I don't care if I have to end up covering the cost myself. " I stated. That's when I heard someone speak up.

"Bella is it?" The voice asked. "Yes." I stated. I was wondering if myself and Rosalie wouldn't be able to talk to you in private for a moment." The elfin girl with inky black hair stated. I looked back to see who I assumed was Alice asking me this question. "Sure no problem." I stepped into the empty cubicle down the hall from where we were standing.

Alice looked at me "Alice Brannon at your service, I have to say I just love doing stuff like this, I mean I love getting people gives, and I love putting gifts together, and I love.."

---Ok at this point I wasn't sure she was breathing

"And I love that I happen to have my best friend and best partner in crime in one Miss Rosalie Hale, who just so happened to be standing in front of you and was lucky enough to get her transfer request approved when I found out I was coming to Forks." I looked over at Rosalie and smiled."

"Partner in crime you say." "I'm sure between the three of us we can come up with something great for Carmen & Tanya, but I'm telling you now if that Lauren chick tries to put her name on the card like she decided to chip in out of the goodness in her heart." "Well lets just say I'm not one for too much violence, but I would be happy to put my high-heel in the back of her skull." I couldn't help but get a smile back from both. And that day I met my very best two girlfriends and we've been tight every since.

**February 2007**

My marriage started to take a nose dive at about this time…well I would seriously say that it had been a great first two years, but after that not so good. Mikes grandfather got into some debt way over his head and lost the business. It closed on 2/17/08 and they were only given 10 days notice that the store would close. At least he got unemployment benefits but those would only be for 6 months. Mike brought home a grand total of 156.00 a week with unemployment. We couldn't eve pay our bills and he said he wanted to finish up school…which he was still at junior college doing that leisurely pace thing since 2001. I agreed that he needed to finish up his degree(s) as soon as possible, I mean for gods sake he could have been a doctor by now at the number of years of college he's been through. As I continued to work 40 hours a week plus cook, clean, laundry and basically wait on Mike hand and foot I started to realize that I my life wasn't where I thought It would be at this point. I thought I would have at least one little one, I thought I would own a house, have a cute car and a golden retriever. All I had was a husband who was unemployed, would rather jack off to porn than touch me (which at this point I'm starting to get use to) or plan Diablo on the internet. Mike told me I wasn't good enough to be a mother, he told me I was lazy and it wasn't something he wanted his children picking up, so until I could get my shit in order he would not be "impregnating me" he actually said it that way..what the fuck?

**January 2008**

Mike got a job, he was under contact that he had to out of town for 2 weeks every other month. I couldn't believe it, I would be so very very loney without him home. I cried when I found out, I didn't know what I would do with 2 weeks all by myself, just me and my cat. He was making pretty decent money and I thought maybe it was just the stress of him not working that had me so depressed, I mean I loved him right and he loved me, we could make this work.

**March 2008**

Mike was getting ready to leave when he turned around said "It's ok baby, it's only for 2 weeks. Come on that's nothing." I smiled weakly and him and told him to have a good time and to not worry I would be fine that I would stay busy between work and home duties (and maybe a little more Alice & Rosalie time)

Mike didn't call but two times and that was to only ask if we had enough extra money for him to go out with some of the buddies he met down at his training sight. As always I told him it was fine, even if we didn't have the money I would always tell him he could do what he wanted, because it made him happy, my happiness didn't mean a thing to me anymore.

**May 2008**

"Hey Bell." Mike said.

"Let's buy a house, why don't we start really really looking."

I smiled, wow maybe life can get back on track, I know I haven't really felt anything for mike in a really long time but still, I know I love him.

We placed a bid on a relly cute 4bd 2bath ranch style house in the foothills of Forks. Our offer was accepted and we started Escrow 2 days later. Mike left on the same day for his next 2 week trip.

**July 2008**

We closed on the house and were packing up from the old apartment so that we could get over and get settled into the new house ASAP, of course mike his two week trip coming up right smack in the middle of it, so I figured if we could get things packet up and over to the new place the least I could do what unpack while he was gone.

**8/25/08**

Mike was sitting in the living room watching TV, I was over on the love seat reading a book, I forgot that I had told Charlie I would email Sue the recipe for a really great fish fry I found. Mike got up to use the bathroom and I called to him. "Hey honey, can I use the laptop to email Charlie real quick." He answered "Sure Babe, just close out whatever is open for me ok?"

I pulled the laptop over to me and opened it up, I noticed that his G-Mail account was still up..and then I saws something I didn't ever think I would see :

So I clicked on it, it came in 9 hours ago and read.

"Hey baby,"

" I cannot wait to have you in my arms again."

"I love you"

"Jessica"

I was floored, I was sick to my stomach, I was reading this wrong I had to be. Mike came back in, surprisingly I was able maintain composure.

I looked at Mike. "Do you want to tell me what this is about?" I asked, shoving his laptop and the open email back in his lap. He stared at the screen dumbfounded but I knew he was trying to figure out what angle to play this one.

"Bella, it's not what you think."

I snarled at him. "oh its not what I think, it's not what I think, I think that you have Jessica sending you emails telling you that she can't wait to be in your arms again." "Oh and did I mention the fact that she said I LOVE YOU." What the fuck.

"Bella baby come on, you know I told you I worked with a girl named Jessica, she is down at the training center were I go for two weeks." Well one night a group of us were watching a movie and everyone left and it was just us." "One thing lead to another and there was some kissing and groping but that's it I swear."

I was sick, I felt the tears fall onto my shirt that is the only way I knew I was crying. I realized that my dream of what my life could or would be had just been shattered. I looked at him in the eyes and told him that I wanted to know everything. I screamed

"Did you sleep with her?"

"Did you fuck her?"

"Was it good for you?"

After me screaming at the top of my lungs for 15 minutes he finally looked at my with eyes that were colder than I ever thought was possible and said. "Yeah, I slept with her, I fucked and you know what it was DAMN good." Unlike you she actually knows how to Cum, she would ride me and cum two to three times just by doing that." I was shocked, I didn't know that I could hurt so much.

I looked at him with as much venom as I could muster.

"GET THE FUCK OUT"