I can feel it
Abby saw the change in him. She did. But she thought it would pass. She didn't see how hurt he was. How much it had hurt to lose Jeanne. She didn't see how much he depended on them, on Gibbs, to be alright. Not until today. Today she had seen in his eyes something she had never seen before. Pain. Fear. Depression.
Today she had seen it in his eyes. And it frightened her. It did. She had no idea what happened but something cost the switch in him. She could almost see him giving up. She wanted to help him. Hug him. But he left before she could. She didn't see him again. So she pushed It away. That feeling that something was terribly wrong with Tony, she pushed it away.
And now she sat at home. Staring at the phone. And she wondered. She wondered if she hadn't done the wrong thing. And now she regretted it. She regretted deciding not looking for him. Not trying to listen to him. She hated herself for not looking for him. For not seeing something was terribly wrong. For not going after him.
And she knew. She knew something was terribly wrong with Tony. She could feel it. And she was not the kind of person to ignore what she was feeling. Tony was in trouble. She could feel it. So she took her phone and dialled his number. Hoping he would just pick up. Hoping that it was all her imagination. That she was wrong.
Hey. You've reached Tony DiNozzo. I'm not here. Leave a message. He didn't pick up. And now she was sure. Sure of the fact something was wrong with him. She could feel it. She heart the beep. Tony. Tony I'm worried about you. Please, please pick up. Please. She kept whispering his name and please. Hoping it would make him pick up. But nothing happened.
She hung up and felt worse than before. She realised she was shaking. Something was wrong with Tony. She just knew it. She did. She dialled Gibbs number. Desperate to hear the voice of the one man who would fix everything. She just hoped she didn't get an answering machine again.
Gibbs sat in his basement staring at his boat. Something was wrong. Something was wrong with Tony. He knew he shouldn't have screamed at him. But he had always thought that Tony realized that what he screamed, he didn't mean it. It was the heat of the moment. It was. He didn't mean to scream. But he did. And he saw the hurt in his eyes. It had been something he had never seen before.
He had promised himself he would talk to Tony once the case was finished. But Tony left before he got the chance. And he decided against going to his apartment. Why he had no idea. But he did. And now he sat here. He flipped his phone open without looking at the ID. Probably the first time he was shocked to hear Abby's voice. He had been convinced it would be DiNozzo.
'Gibbs! Gibbs! You have to do something. Something's wrong with Tony?' 'How do you now Abs?' 'I just do. I called him. And I asked him to pick up. And he didn't he always picks up Gibbs. And I know you think I'm probably overreacting but you didn't see the pain in his eyes. And I know Tony. I know something's wrong with Him. I can feel it Gibbs!' 'Abbs! Stay on the line. I'll call him.'
And he did. And Tony didn't pick up. And he knew; He knew something was wrong. He knew Abby was right. Because no matter where Tony was he never ignored a phone call from him. 'Abbs you still there?' 'Yes!' 'Ok. Call him again. I'm going to his apartment.' 'He didn't pick up?' 'No. He didn't.' He hung up without further explanations. He ran to his car and drove.
He had never driven so fast in his life. Never. Yes he went fast on occasions but this this had been really fast. Something was wrong with Tony. And he couldn't shake the feeling of that somehow it was all his fault. Why hadn't he pushed Tony? Why hadn't he made him tell what was wrong? Why did he let it go so easily? Why?
He ran up the stairs. Past a lot of surprised people. He ran to his door. And stopped. He shook his head. Please, oh god please. Don't let me have forgotten the keys! He didn't have the keys. Great. He'd break the door if he had to. He could always buy a new door. But he needed Tony. He ran into the apartment. The television was playing. There was an empty bottle on the table. There was glass on the floor. The light was burning in the bedroom. Something was wrong. Slowly he started to walk towards the open door.