Sakaki just wants to be accepted by cats. Any way possible to make that happen.

Twisted 2: Animal Assimilation

Why do cats always bite me? Is it, like Kagura once told me, that my hands stink?

Sniff.

I don't smell anything unorthodox.

Just regular human hands.

Maybe it's something else. Something that gets transferred to my hands.

Maybe from my hair or breath. Perhaps when I'm taking a shower, some odours gets stuck in my hands and cats react to them badly.

Maybe it's the shampoo I use.

Well, then again I have used many different shampoos and conditioners, yet the results are always the same. So it can't be something as simple as wrong cleansing products.

Maybe… maybe, it's got something to do with my breath. Yeah. Maybe if it's something from my breath, it could get transferred to my hands when I eat.

Poooh…

Sniff, sniff.

No… I can't smell anything awry about my breath… although that's probably to be expected. The human nose is very much inferior to that of a cat or really any other animal that rely on their sense of smell.

Am I just a disgusting person, then? That animals would shun me? Body odour, pheromones, other natural deficiencies?

Something the animals instinctively pick up from me?

They wouldn't be reacting badly to my… Oh, I hope not. They're not reacting badly to my… own smells? Like thinking I'm trying to take over their territories? Oh, no. It can't be that. It… It mustn't be that! I can't do anything about my natural scents!

No. Wait. Calm down Sakaki. Let's not jump to conclusions… though that does sound a frightfully possible reality.

I just wish that wouldn't be it, because then I'll never be able to get close to a cat during my entire life.

But…

Strange also that it only seems to be cats that have a problem with me.

Oh, my most treasured Neko-Kami-sama! Am I being punished for something? Can I apologise for my digressions?

…Or. On second thoughts, maybe I'm approaching this thing from the wrong angle. Maybe… I am actually being expected to do something about it? Like, an actual physical motion to get their trust or respect?

Maybe it's not about my natural scents, or anything repelling in me, but they just expect me to… do something to gain their trust and friendship.

Yes… That… could be a real idea.

Maybe… Maybe after school I'll try it.

Yes, I think I might be onto something.

I must find a cat on the way home and bite them! Yes. That should solve my problems!

When I bite them, the cats will understand me and then… maybe they'll allow me to pet them.

Maybe by biting me, they are testing if I'm worth their companionship. They want me to bite them back.

Ah… it's all starting to become clear now… Oh, what a happy day!

----

NEXT DAY

"My Goodness! Sakaki-san! What happened to your head?! It's all scratched and bandaged up!! Are you all right?! Did you have a bad fall or something!?"

"He… didn't like it after all. The biting… Maybe that wasn't… a good idea."

"…Sakaki's rough ideas of… foreplay? Could she be a sexual deviant?"

"Best not to even go there, Tomo. Just ignore her."

"It's always the quiet ones…"

Poor Sakaki. Her thoughts were logical, but unfortunately didn't really work. And as many people think Sakaki ends up in fights all the time with all the bandages on her hands, so surely it wouldn't be beyond her to also get involved in rather risqué and rough sexual endeavours too. I just love writing twisted Sakaki!