Hello guys, sorry for taking so long :( Hope you haven't given up on this story yet! I hadn't forgotten about it, but other fandoms came, university came, a new apartment, a new job and several trips came, and you know how fast time flies… aaaanyway, I'm back again, hope's not lost, and I would like thank all of you very much for reviewing my work! Your encouraging comments mean so much to me!!
Krysty: Thanks for telling me! Stupid typos ;)
And now… on with the show!
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CHAPTER 2
It turned out to be easier than he had expected. After all, his brother and he had long since mastered the art of acting in front of the girls, no matter how they felt themselves.
My brother and I…
A cold lump of dread was twisting in his stomach. He couldn't get the scene he had witnessed out of his head, even as was sitting close to a dark-haired girl with pale features, whose huge eyes remained fixed on his face in awe all the time while they talked about nothing at all. Nothing of importance anyway.
"Ladies and gentlemen, it's time to dance!" Tamaki's cheerful voice carried across the upper deck, and at a clap of his hands, the musicians marched to their respective places. Tamaki had ordered a music band, all dressed in colourful sailor outfits, to play on the upper deck, and Hikaru had to admit that the blonde really knew how to create an atmosphere. The yacht he'd organized for their female guests was magnificent, a dream in white and blue, and he wondered for a moment if he had made all this up only to be able to present it to a wide-eyed Haruhi, who, most likely, had never before been on this kind of ship. However, the pang of jealousy that would normally have accompanied this thought didn't come. Today, it was someone else who drew Hikaru's attention.
All the while he was dancing with his guest his eyes kept drifting to his younger brother who, in turn, was gracefully leading his girl up and down the dance floor.
Some would consider Hikaru narcissistic for thinking his twin was beautiful, but the older Hitachiin boy didn't think anything of it. To him, they had never been identical; as a matter of fact, he found it puzzling how people could mistake one of them for the other when they where so different. One entity, maybe, but two opposite parts of it. Kaoru was his counterpart, and that was what Hikaru loved about him.
Anyway, he thought while watching his other half, his brother was beautiful, no doubt about it.
He didn't even register the loving, adoring look on his face, and thankfully his guest was so utterly high at this display of brotherly love that she didn't mind that Hikaru hadn't acknowledged her presence for minutes. Otherwise, Tamaki would've had his hide, as he appeared out of nowhere right behind the older twin, nudging his back and whispering something about sunbathing and showing some skin to the ladies.
Given the fact that is was only March and the weather not at all inviting for something as exposing as sunbathing, Hikaru gave the Prince a brief look that clearly questioned his sanity, before resigning to his fate, disentangling his arms from his guest and excusing himself.
Sometime later, the Hitachiin twins were lounging comfortably (and shirtlessly) on the sun deck, Kaoru's head resting in Hikaru's lap. The older twin felt reminded of how he had awoken this morning. He liked the feeling of Kaoru in his arms, still… something was amiss. Had been for a while now. His brother's thoughts had drifted off to a place Hikaru couldn't follow, as they'd done so often lately. Trying to find an answer as to what was wrong, the older boy remembered the weird scene between his brother and Kyouya some hours earlier. His eyes automatically sought out the Shadow King…and the redhead froze. Kyouya's gaze was fixed on Kaoru. Not on the twins, not accidentally on one of them, but specifically on Kaoru, and Hikaru didn't know what shocked him more – that the dark-haired boy knew who of them was who, or the look in his eyes that the redhead couldn't decipher right away. It was…intense… dark… hungry. That's what it was. Kyouya was watching his Kaoru with such desire… Hikaru paled.
No… impossible. Yet as much as his mind tried to deny it, all the signs were there. The touch he'd witnessed this morning. The strange look in Kaoru's eyes to that time. It all made sense now. It was clear that Kyouya wanted Kaoru – and it was equally clear that Kaoru wasn't sure how to react, how to decide.
Hikaru almost would've growled. His chest was burning with anger, and he couldn't wait to confront Kyouya. The Shadow King wouldn't get away with that!
His chance came later that day, when the girls retired to prepare for the fulminant gala reception in the evening. Tamaki had briefly summoned the Host Club members on the bridge to brief them on their roles for the night. After his enthusiastic speech, he dragged off Haruhi (to force her to wear a dress, no doubt), with Kaoru in tow who probably intended to save the poor girl from too much tono-energy. Mori and Hunny had already left the room, leaving behind only Kyouya, who was typing something on his laptop, and… Hikaru.
Noticing Hikaru's continued presence, Kyouya looked up. "What is it?"
In an attempt not to yell at his senpai, the older twin tried to calm down, tried, for the first time, to analyze his feelings.
Somehow, Hikaru had relied on his brother to always be there. Not consciously, not with the intention of using his twin, no. It simply felt natural that Kaoru would always be right behind him to catch him, to watch his back, just as Hikaru would catch him…
Every step he'd taken out of their shared garden had been taken with the secure knowledge that, if anything failed, it wouldn't really matter, because the most important person for him would be there.
It had always been that way, and the thought that Kaoru might, one day, not be there anymore, that they might not be the most important persons in each other's lives was so absurd, so plainly unimaginable, it had never occurred to him. For living without his sibling wasn't just unthinkable… it was impossible.
He needed him.
He hated sleeping without his twin. When Kaoru stopped his nightly visits altogether, Hikaru had of course wondered,. He hadn't questioned, though. Maybe he should have.
Maybe, then, his twin wouldn't have stood so close to the shadow king.
These conclusions made the thought of Kyouya near Kaoru appear even nastier. "I'd like you to stay away from my brother", he ground out between grit teeth.
"You don't seem to want to see him happy", Kyouya commented coolly, adjusting his glasses so that his eyes, once again, were hidden from view by the shining surface, seemingly not the least bit offended by Hikaru's less than friendly words.
Happy? the older Hitachiin twin raged inwardly, you're not the one that could make him happy!
"You're only using him!"
"And what for, if I may ask?"
"To forget about the fact that Tamaki has only eyes for Haruhi!" That had come out fiercer than intended, and for a brief instant Hikaru wondered whether he should apologize for his cruel answer, but decided against it. He couldn't stand Kyouya's guts right now, and there was no reason (at least no good reason, in Hikaru's opinion) not to tell him.
"So do you, if I may point out. And I would advise you not to tell me... but Kaoru." With that, Kyouya took his notebook and simple walked out of the room, seemingly completely unfazed by their conversation, leaving a seething Hikaru behind.
What do you know of how to make him happy? You know nothing, while I know him inside out. And I'm so not going to let you have him!!
Refusing to ponder the reason for his unjustified anger at Kyouya, Hikaru stormed out the door, as well. The shadow king's question wouldn't leave his mind, and so he went to search out the one he needed to see the most right now, to get some answers.
Searching the yacht for his brother gave Hikaru time to cool down, time to think. He could even figure out some of the answers he needed for himself. Why Kaoru had stopped coming to him at night, for example. So do you, if I may point out, the Shadow King's words echoed in his mind. He had never considered it before, how his behaviour might seem to everybody else. Could it be that Kaoru had misinterpreted the fascination Haruhi held for him, a fascination that was only that – interest and brotherly affections?
Might it be that Kaoru had felt that his brother might… disappear? Leave him?? Had he stopped visiting Hikaru at night for that reason? To gently sever the connection between them, so it wouldn't hurt when Hikaru stepped away from him?
Impossible, Hikaru thought, paling. Impossible!! Kaoru couldn't be afraid of that! He couldn't be afraid of something so completely improbable!
Could he?
… Yes, Hikaru answered himself, his ever-thoughtful, ever-pensive twin might do just that.
It wasn't me leaving you, Kaoru, he told his twin's image in his mind, You thought of leaving, of us being separated one day, years before I even considered taking a single step without you. In your heart, you had long ago turned from me, to protect yourself of the hurt that was sure to come. And I can't even fault you
You knew, of course. Just like you've always known more than I do. However…believe it or not…I really would have liked to stay with you.
Damn, I still do! I want to be the one at your side! Not someone else, and especially not…
Hikaru surprised himself with the vehemence of those thoughts. Somehow, the mere thought of Kyouya's hand on his twin's neck was enough to make him burn up with a malevolent emotion he hadn't even known up to now and, thus, didn't know how to interpret. An emotion that made him want to grab Kaoru, drag him to a place where none would disturb them, and never let him go again.
It surprised him even more, since he actually liked Kyouya and held a healthy amount of respect for him – so why did he feel the need to smash his glasses right into his ever-collected face?
Hikaru grit his teeth.
They needed to talk. Now.
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Alright, hope you liked it! Next chapter: fluff-alarm!