Disclaimer: Epics
Chapter 3
(Outside hypersleep room [I forget what it's called])
Romero: What do you think you were doing a rescue party had already been dispatched! We do not need your help!
Rion: (sad face)
Romero: DO YOU KNOW WHAT I'M GOING TO DO NOW?!
Rion: No?
Romero: DANCE PARTY!
(Techno starts playing)
(All soldiers and scientist start to dance)
Rion: O_O
(Music stops)
Romero: (Walks away)
Cas: Thanks for your help back there.
Rion: What the f--k just happened?
Glados: Intruder alert on floor number one. And all the cake is gone.
All soldiers and scientist (including Rion and Cas): Aw...
Glados: Point of entry. Well that's for you to find out.
Rion: What?
Romero: Cas take a unit and head to the genral office!
Cas: Okie dokie!
Romero: I'll head for the flight control office. And um... Caddy or Gabby I don't know your name, but go to the system develpment center!
Caddy or Gabby: It's cause I'm black isn't it?
Romero: That's right soldier!
Caddy or Gabby: You fag!
(Flight control office)
Soldier(from outside): AHHHHH!
Romero: Open the shutters!
Other soldier: (Opens them)
Screaming soldier (S soldier): (Walks in perfectly fine)
Romero: What happened?
S soldier: I stubbed my toe.
Romero: (Facepalm)
S soldier: Yeah.. (falls to the ground)
Zombie: Brains!
Romero: RETREAT!
(Soldiers run away)
Rion: Umm....
Zombies: Grrr
Rion: Oh my God more zombies it's just like Resident Evil! (Kills zombies)
(General office)
Cas: It's no good there's to many of them.
Soldier A: The other side is already contaminated with radiation!
Soldier B: It's like they're playing with toy soldiers.
(Shutters break open)
Cas: Well I'll be damned.
(Giant toy soldiers break in)
Cas: RUN! RUN LIKE HELL!
Rion: More zombies... either the enemy design team got lazy or this is the best Ash can do...
(System development: littered with dead zombies)
Caddy or Gabby: I'm bored...
(Outside hypersleep room)
Romero: Damn it.. the enemy is stronger then our intelligence reported. Which is very wierd since we never communicate.
Cas: They took over floor one. There's no way to escape now.
Rion: Our only option is to defeat Ash.
Romero: How easily he says that. If we were to attack Ash we'd need to control the enriched uranium refinary. And to do that we'd need three bases like this one. And a hell of a lot of nerf guns!
Rion: We'll just wait instead?
Romero: Yes.
Rion: Can't argue with that.
Glados: Enemy has penatrated into floor number two.
Cas: If we wait here we're gonna die a similary bland death like the guy in shadow hearts covenant. You know the name...
Romero: Cas, I don't remember asking for your outdated video game reference... we all know its Nicholai. Now other person request assistance that will never show up!
Soldier: Yes sir!
Romero: Cas, take the remaining men and wait on floor three instead of being smart and taking an offensive!
Cas: Rodger.
(Floor 3)
Cas: I want some cookies!
(Lillia's lab)
Rion: What should I do?
Lillia: I hate to do this to you, but you must find the guy with a much more annoying voice then mine.
Rion: That's impossible!
Lilia: I know right! Also inject yourself with this new incredibly difficulty lowering ppec! Also take into account that you will find the same thing in the uranium refinary that we've never researched in!
(Hanger)
Rion: This must be the ship..
(Inside ship)
Pat: Hi there!
Rion: Were you waiting here for like the past five days?
Pat: Yeah. They said I'm too annoying to be a soldier and that everything would target me first.
Rion: Hmmm...
(Michoangelo city)
Subzero: This isn't as fun as Fallout 3. Where's Fawkes.... (Sees Pat's ship) Hmm I wonder where they are going. (Follows)
End of chapter 3
Ooooh what's gonna happen next? Epic cross over :O
Also please take no offence to the "it's because i'm black" joke.