Another night dragged on, and Leia was once again alone in her bed that suddenly seemed obscenely large without Han lying next to her. She selfishly hoped that one of the children would come to her, seeking refuge from a nightmare and helping to ease the intense loneliness she was feeling.

She had spent the evening putting on a brave face for Jacen, Jaina and Anakin, still trying to act as though nothing was wrong while they told her how much they missed their daddy. She could tell by the look in their eyes as she kissed them goodnight that they no longer believed her. Even she didn't believe herself anymore.

It had been too long, now. She felt as though she might be able to explain Han's absence for a night or two, but she was finally able to admit to herself, in spite of the anger she'd been feeling and her strong desire not to fear the worst, that Han was simply not the kind of man who would run away from them, no matter how upset he was. She knew him better than that.

Where are you, Han? Did something really happen to you? I'm so sorry for how I've acted, but I can't fix things until you come home. I need you to come back to me.

Punching her pillow in frustration, she buried her face and heaved a sigh before turning to look next to her. On the bedside table was a holo of her and Han from their wedding day, smiling and gazing lovingly into each other's eyes. In remembering the happiness and total contentment she'd felt on that wonderful occasion, she was also reminded of how much she truly did love that scoundrel, how much she missed him and how much it would hurt if she lost him.

I never meant to take him for granted. Why do I always have to get so preoccupied? And why did I get mad at him for telling me what he was feeling? If anyone is being selfish in this situation, it's me.

After giving up on trying to sleep, she tried to comm him again, even though she knew she wouldn't get a response. Her fears started to overwhelm her, and she was suddenly terrified that something awful had happened.

What if Luke is right? What if Anakin's dream wasn't just a dream?

It was still early enough that the sun hadn't come up, but Leia decided she couldn't wait any longer, so she called Winter to look after Jacen, Jaina and Anakin.

Winter arrived quickly, though to Leia it seemed like an eternity. "I'm sorry to ask you here so early, Winter. The kids are still asleep, and I hate to leave them like this right now, but-"

"Leia," Winter interrupted, "I know you want to be strong for the children, but you must realize that right now Han needs you more than they do."

Leia had simply nodded before heading to her office where she used her high-level clearance to scan through Coruscant security recordings for any sign of her husband from a few nights ago, annoyed with herself for not doing it sooner.

She had the system search for his image and, after several long minutes, finally came up with a recording from the night he'd left, maybe an hour after she'd last seen him.

He was heading into a bar. There's a surprise, Leia thought sarcastically. He was on one of the lower levels where he never would've let her go by herself, and where she knew he wouldn't have been bothered. It was obvious that he wanted to be alone.

Or was it?

The next image that appeared made her stomach churn. Han was exiting the bar, several minutes after having gone in, only this time he wasn't alone. There was a woman with him, and she had her arm around him before they got into a speeder and rode off together.

Leia had never felt so betrayed. Maybe they weren't exactly the insatiable lovers they'd been once upon a time, but she didn't think things had gotten that bad. Nor did she believe that Han would ever do something like that to her and the kids.

Then again, with the way he'd acted before he left, maybe she shouldn't have been so surprised. Or maybe he'd simply gotten so drunk that he didn't even realize what he was doing. The fact that he hadn't come home yet suddenly made a lot more sense, and she found herself hoping he wouldn't return at all.

She slammed her fists against the desk, wanting to only feel anger. But she couldn't keep the tears from coming to her eyes, and she brought her hands to her face. How could you do this to me, Han? How could you do this to us?

The intense ache deep in her chest made her realize that she still cared for him deeply, otherwise the thought of him with another woman wouldn't have hurt her so much.

She squeezed her eyes shut and tried to convince herself that the man she married would never have done such a thing. Surely there had to be some other explanation. But why else would Han ride off with some strange woman?

She was torn between what she'd seen with her own eyes and her unwillingness to believe what it implied. She'd never even considered being unfaithful to him, and she had always thought that he felt the same.

MY Han would never do that to me. Would he?

She was startled by the sound of her commlink buzzing, and composed herself just enough to answer. If she hadn't known it was a call from home, she wouldn't have even bothered.

"What is it?"

"I'm sorry, Leia," she heard Winter say. "I know I don't normally bother you at your office, but it's Anakin."

"What's the matter?"

"It's just that, he is inconsolable. He seems absolutely convinced that… well, that his father is dying. And it's starting to scare Jacen and Jaina as well. I wouldn't have bothered you unless…"

"I know, Winter. I know. I'll be right there."

After wiping her eyes and taking a deep breath, Leia downloaded the security file to her data pad and headed for home, still unsure of what to believe. She wished she could figure out a way to ease Anakin's fears without having to tell him that his father had left them purposely. The three-year old was far too perceptive to believe a lie, but she couldn't very well tell him the truth. Not yet, anyway.

Han, I'm never going to forgive you for the pain you're causing us right now.