brief summary of why this hasn't been updated; the last chapter didn't get great reviews, nor have my other stories recently, and, worry wort I am, I thought I'd lost 'It'. I didn't want to upload this chapter as I had a bit of a failing of confidence, so I really, really hope you like it!
Two days later, after a relatively speedy recovery, the sun shone through the Gryffindor boys' dormitory, coaxing a sound yawn from Remus' lips. Sitting up gently, he rolled his shoulders, entire body tense in preparation for the change it would undergo that night.
Climbing gingerly out of bed, Remus shuffled over to the mirror, glancing at his sleepy form determinedly.
He had decided the night before that there was no avoiding the inevitable. He had to tell Sirius and Peter about his non-furry, sexuality secret. Without James, of course, who would probably try and sabotage the whole thing to win the bet. Damn James. "You can do this."
"Damn straight you can, dear!" The mirror answered.
"I don't think straight is really the best term to use in this instance." Remus replied, shuffling towards the bathroom. Minutes later, upon exiting, he spotted Sirius, and approached him with brow raised.
"Sirius? What are you up to?" Remus asked warily, coming to stand at the end of the bed with crossed arms.
"Moony!" Sirius grinned, climbing towards his friend and off the bed. "Why so suspicious! I've done nothing wrong yet!" He winked, walking towards his friend.
You're fully dressed. At midday. On a Sunday. When there's no Quidditch. That's reason enough to be suspicious." Remus replied, not backing away from Sirius' fast approaching form. The approaching full moon had his senses on high alert, and his weary form knew something was going on, something he wouldn't particularly like.
"Suspicious is such a strong word, Rem." Sirius replied, grin on his face as he stepped closer, stopping when he was inches away from the slightly flustered werewolf.
"Ahem?" Sirius and Remus jumped apart as James coughed loudly, looking between the pair with an amused smirk. He stood with two broomsticks under his arm, much to Remus' confusion. "Sirius, its time."
"You have the potion?"
"I have the potion." James nodded, handing a vial over to Sirius, before looking over at Remus with a grin. "I'm going to make Lily admit her love for me."
"That better not be a love potion, Prongs. I know you have no love for the law, but making Lily fall in love with you using illegal measures wi-"
"Oh, Remus, of course its not a love potion! I'm not that stupid!" James grinned, clapping Remus on the back. "Well, we've got to go and knock Lily out. Come on Padfoot!" James threw one of the brooms to Sirius, and within seconds they had both flown out of the window, Sirius shooting an embarrassed grin at Remus' confused face.
"Knock Lily... James! James, wait -" Remus called out the window fruitlessly, before sighing. "That poor, poor girl."
James landed his broom silently a few hundred meters from where Lily sat beside the lake, not wanting to frighten her too much. Sitting down calmly beside her, he looked across the Great Lake, watching fish and mermaids skim just below the surface.
"Look, Lily, I'm really, really sorry about that whole thing with your cat." James stated, glancing at her briefly. "It was a really stupid thing to do, but I just wanted you to like me, and somewhere in my small brain that seemed like it might help."
The pair sat in silence for a moment, gazing across the lake contemplatively.
"The stunning spell fixed her saliva infection." Lily stated, squinting up to glance at James against the winter sunlight. "And she doesn't have quite so big a limp anymore."
James started as Lily spoke, looking at her with wide eyes. "That's good."
"Yes, it is. Thank you, I suppose. In your own, very special and illogical way, you helped her." Lily stated, eyes staring off across the lake.
"Glad I could help." James smiled, before spotting a large man behind Lily. "Oh God, Not no-" Lily turned, squeaking as she spotted the large man behind her.
"Hello Princess." A grotesque, broken face filled her vision, just before the world went black.
"Sirius!"
"What James? I thought I was meant to KO her!" Sirius whined, wand dangling loosely in his hand.
"Yes, but we were having a civil conversation! She hadn't threatened to kill me once!" James replied, motioning towards the static body on the floor.
"Oh well, you'll get over it. We still on for scaring her a bit?" Sirius grinned, the usually charming smile looking more like a grimace with the new features.
"Well I suppose we don't have a choice now, do we?"
Remus sat in the dormitory, attempting to read, for another 20 minutes after James and Sirius left, before a mixture of guilt and curiosity got the better of him. Grabbing the map, Remus sighed, looking across the paper for his friends and Lily. Spotting them in the Shack, his brow furrowed, before he took off as fast as possible.
"You shall never be free!" Claude laughed menacingly at the tied up girl, resting his large hands on her shoulders. "And the kingdom will be mine!!"
James raised an eyebrow at Claude's exclamation, with Claude shrugging back, mouthing 'its what they said in that fairytale?'.
"I keep telling you, I don't own a kingdom!" Lily stated, a mixture of exhasperation and annoyance in her voice. "And I don't know who you are, but Dumbledore will find you and stop this madness!"
"Ah, but you live in a castle, full of sorcery and charms!" Claude exclaimed, running the tip of his wand around Lily's neck. "And so I must smite you with my turgid sword!" Claude exclaimed, thrusting his hips forward dramatically as James rolled his eyes. "Your Dumbledore is no match for me, you hearty wrench!"
"What in Merlin's name?" Remus exclaimed, firing a stunning curse, a winding spell and a jelly hex at Claude and jogging over to Lily's tied form, quickly cutting the ropes and ripping off the blindfold, immediately receiving an armful of Lily.
"Oh, thank god!" Lily exclaimed, as Remus attempted to comfort her, wand still pointed at her would be attacker.
"Remus!" The second Remus heard James' whining tone behind him, he knew this could only end badly. "I was meant to rescue her!" Feeling Lily stiffen in his arms, Remus turned slowly, keeping himself between Lily and James. James' face told a story, and immediately upon seeing his annoyance, Remus worked it out.
"Oops?" He muttered, looking over to where Claude lay, an annoyed frown on his face too.
"I can't believe you hexed me, Rem!" A voice far too familiar whined from the imposing man's body.
"Sirius, really?" Remus sighed exasperatedly, reversing the curses.
"It was all James' idea!" He exclaimed.
"And you thought it was a good idea to go along with it?"
"I can't help that I'm a natural follower." Sirius shrugged, blinking innocently.
"Follower, right." Remus scoffed, the close to the surface wolf growling at the 'attack' on its desired partner. "I'm assuming polyjuice. I don't even want to know how you stole a hair from whoever this is."
"James Potter." Remus and Sirius fell silent as Lily's low, wrathful voice broke through their bickering. "You concocted a potion with illegal ingredients to make Sirius look intimidating. You knocked me out and tied me to a chair. You And then you have the nerve to get annoyed at Remus when he comes to stop this madness!" Lily was all but yelling now, volume and pitch increasing as she became more and more agitated. "And to think, I thought you had changed!"
"Sweet Lily, it wasn't so much a kidnap... I knew you were safe the entire time! I was going to rescue you and everything!"
"I thought I was in danger, you absolute prat!" Lily yelled.
"From my 'turgid sword'?" Sirius scoffed, as Lily's face reddened. "Come off it Lily, you weren't that scared. I doubt you even believed it. You're just looking for a reason to yell at James."
"You, Sirius Black, are one of the most horrific examples of the human race." Lily snarled, walking up to Sirius threateningly.
"Well, Princess, take a look in the mirror. The only reason we did this was because you've got a stick shoved so far up your arse that you won't even agree to a date with Prongs when he's being nice. Hell, he had nothing to lose doing this because you wouldn't give him an inch, you stuck up cow." Sirius replied, not backing down. Remus and James both winced as a loud crack echoed through the air from Lily's slap, before she stormed out of the shack, Remus guiding her towards the exit when her face became flustered.
"You owe me one, Prongs." Sirius muttered, rubbing his jaw with a wince. "Good lord, that girl's got a good punch on her."
"She's had a lot of practice." James grinned, rubbing his own jaw sympathetically. "Remus, I can't believe you interrupted my hero moment!"
"I probably should have realised it was Sirius when he used the words 'hearty wrench'." Remus conceded with a lopsided grin. "Shouldn't the polyjuice be wearing off soon?"
"I drank quite a lot. Wasn't sure when we were going to let the little witch go!" Sirius stated, still rubbing his jaw. "Don't worry, I'll be back to normal before sundown, Rem."
"Unless you downed several vats of Polyjuice, you should be." Remus replied, going over to sit on the old chair in the centre of the room. "We've got four hours. No point leaving the shack now. Anyone fancy exploding snap?"
A few hours later, after several games of exploding snap and a strong drink, the moon set, and 10 hours later the moon rose as usual. Peter shuffled from the shack first for his early morning Transfiguration remedial group, as the others stayed in the shack.
James watched through half lidded eyes as Sirius went through the usual post-full moon routines, healing and closing all the injuries on Remus' body with learned care, occasionally stroking the scars and healing wounds that littered the boy's body, before carefully dressing him.
"I think I hate your scars as much as you do." Sirius stated aloud, rubbing lotion over the final scrapes on Remus' face. "Each one must be so painful, I can't imagine..." Sirius tilted his head, gazing at the werewolf contemplatively. "You're so amazing for going through all that crap, I don't know how you do it and still come out so bloody attractive! If I went through that, I'd look like mashed potato..." Sirius trailed off, looking around the room, quickly glancing at James' motionless form, which appeared asleep.
"Its really shit that I'm not brave enough to do this when you're conscious, isn't it?" Sirius grinned, brushing the hair of Remus' face with a smile. "I wonder if this counts as sexual harassment, taking advantage of the fact that you're out for the count?" James watched silently, stomach dropping to his toes as Sirius leant down, placing a soft, loving kiss on Remus' forehead, before moving downwards and kissing his mouth lightly. "God, I'm a loser, aren't I?" Sirius laughed after he pulled away, standing up to lift Remus onto the bed. "And you can't even sarcastically answer my rhetorical questions, what a waste. I'm going to go and get some food, Moons. I'll be back in a minute." Sirius stated to the unconscious man, walking out of the room.
James lay motionless for a few moments, thoughts flying through his mind. "That so did not count." He muttered, thanking God for the 'both parties must be willing and able' clause, as his genitals did not want an unwelcomed airing.
Climbing to a standing position, he waved his fists at the boy in the bed in annoyance, frustration bursting over as he realised that the odds did not look good for him.
"I will not be beaten." James hissed into the unconscious face, fists still flailing madly before he grabbed Remus' shirt, shaking it lightly. "YOU CANNOT DEFEAT ME!"
"If you're going to kill me, please get it over and done with. This melodrama is more painful than death could ever be." Remus muttered, eyes still closed as James let go of his shirt, grabbing Remus' chin instead. Opening his eyes tiredly, Remus looked up at his friend wearily. "You know, if you are going to kill me now, you should probably come up with an alibi."
"I'll tell them I was in the kitchen eating."
"Then Peter or the House Elves could confirm that you were not." Remus stated, relaxing as James let go of his shirt and sat beside him. "Wouldn't hold up in court."
"I'd tell them I grabbed some bread from the side in the kitchen and took it to the dormitory."
"And who could account for your whereabouts?" Remus asked, brow raised. "No one is ever in the common room at this time in the morning except maybe Lily, and after the events of yesterday I think lying to keep you out of jail is far from her prerogative.
"Sirius would vouch for me!"
"Don't be silly, Sirius would be too busy mourning my death."
"Then I'd beat him up until he vouched for me."
"Oh yes, I'm sure the testimony of a black and blue, sobbing Sirius is going to keep you out of the big house." Remus grinned, shuffling up the bed. "I think, for the good of all of the marauders, maybe it would be best if you didn't kill me and accepted your inevitable defeat."
"NEVER!" James cried with a grin, launching himself onto the werewolf's stomach.
"Hey! Off the injured wolfy!" Sirius yelled as he entered the room, trays of food floating either side of him. Sirius climbed onto the bed, laying parallel to Remus as he wrapped an arm around his shoulder. "You feeling alright, Moony?"
"Yes, thank you. Good job with the healing spells." Remus nodded, grabbing an apple from the floating tray.
"No problem." Sirius grinned, grabbing buttered toast for himself.
"Sirius, sort out an argument." James sat up, leaning on his elbows as he bit into some toast. "If I were to kill Remus, would you lie to cover up my inarguable guilt?"
"Are you planning on killing Remus?" Sirius asked, wrapping his arm tighter around Remus' shoulders. "Because I'd rather you didn't, I'm quite fond of our little wolfy amigo."
"Not for the next week or so." James conceded, stretching.
"Can't you get Peter to lie for you?"
"Sirius, he's not going to kill me." Remus interspersed, his voice, still weak from the full moon, being entirely ignored by the other two marauders.
"You know as well as I do that Peter's a rubbish liar. I want you in that courtroom with me when he's dead."
"When I'm dead!?!" Remus replied indignantly, looking between the pair.
"What weapon are you considering using? Because if its handheld, framing someone is going to be far more difficult, dangerous and fun!" Sirius grinned, squeezing the werewolf slightly.
"You're both children of satan." Remus muttered. The two other marauders immediately turned to face him, grinning widely.
"Why thank you!" James bowed, grin never leaving his face.
"How charming of you to notice!" Sirius continued, finally removing his arm from Remus' shoulders.
"You two are incorrigible." Remus muttered, climbing from the bed. "I'm pretty much healed, so I'll see you in class."
"You need any help, Moony?" Sirius jumped up beside him, offering an arm.
"I'm a big boy, Sirius, I can handle getting to class." Remus rolled his eyes tiredly, pulling his robes on. "Now both of you try and put your sensible hats on before class, and no more discussing how you're going to cover up my death. See you later." He grinned, waving as he left.
"You know, sometimes, Sirius, I think our work here is unappreciated."
That night at dinner, the opportunity finally presented itself. James was in detention for a dung bomb gone awry, so Remus, Sirius and Peter were the only Marauders in the Great hall, all the other occupants of the room were deep in conversation and Remus was feeling less wolfy and whiny and more like himself once more.
So, there was only one thing Remus could do. Putting his fork onto his plate, he looked between the marauders, coughing purposely. Once he had their attention, he scratched his head quickly before beginning.
"Well, guys..." Remus started, looking at the two expectant faces before him and ensuring no one was listening to their conversation. Breathing deeply, he looked Peter in the eye, unable to face Sirius as he said it. "I'm gay."
Peter's fork slipped, the squeals as a forkful of mashed potato flew through the air ignored by the three marauders. He stared at Remus for a long moment, mouth agape, before laughing. "Yeah, and I'm Margaret Thatcher. Funny joke, Rem."
"Its not -" Remus started, before seeing some retaliation baked beans flying towards him. Ducking out of the way, Peter wasn't quite so lucky, several beans flying into his ear.
"Hey! Private conversation going on here!" Peter yelled, grabbing a handful of peas and runner beans, throwing them in the general direction of the beans' origin. "Moony, we already have a gay marauder, we don't need another!"
"'We already have a gay marauder'?" Remus repeated, eyebrow raised as several slices of bread flew past the three marauders, slapping into various unassuming Hufflepuffs. "Something you're not telling me, Wormtail?"
"Not me! I like boobs and womanly bits!" Peter replied indignantly, grabbing a ladleful of gravy and letting the liquid fly through the air haphazardly. "You know well and good that Padfoot's the man-lover." Remus' eyebrow scooted higher, finally feeling brave enough to glance over at Sirius, whose face was as red as can be.
"Oh, really?" Remus replied, trying to act casual whilst every bone in his body wanted to jump and shout.
"Yeah, James told me ages ago!" Wormtail grinned, his smile faltering as something cold and wet hit his back.
"James knows?" Remus replied, looking at Sirius once more. Sirius nodded, biting his lip anxiously. Remus smiled internally at his friend's almost kind act, relaxing as he realised James probably knew Sirius was gay before starting the bet, so he was never in for complete and utter humiliation/rejection. Nice to know your friend doesn't want you to fall completely flat on your face.
"But anyway, Remus, I saw you eyeing up that Ravenclaw girl the other day. You know, the one that's good at DADA. We don't need a pair of gays, one is enough to fulfil our marauding quota." Peter stated, throwing bread over his shoulder without a second glance, grabbing a bite from one slice before it was airborne. "Now, if you'll excuse me..." Peter stood up, bowing to the two remaining marauders lightly, before grabbing a vat of ice cream and running to hide behind one of the upturned tables, shielding himself from the debris, before a sneezing spell hit him from behind and he fell like a sack of potatoes.
Sirius and Remus sat across from one another, staring awkwardly as food flew around them. The silence dragged on for a few moments, before Sirius grinned.
"So, Ravenclaw girl that's good at DADA?" Sirius repeated.
"I think he means Celia Trundhall." Remus replied, pointing over to one of the Ravenclaw battlement groups. "James told me she has one arm longer than the other. I think he may be right."
"Oh. Right." Sirius kept smiling, before finally looking around. "Wow, food fight."
"Yes, Food fight." Remus stated as Snape ran away from some charmed runner beans. "You know as a prefect I'm supposed to condone this sort of behaviour." Remus continued, looking at the 'war' contemplatively.
"As a prefect you're also supposed to condone fun of any kind." Sirius grinned as the pair stood, observing the scene casually. "And you know that's not the Marauding Way."
"I suppose not." Remus replied with a grin. "I'm sure I can turn a blind eye." He conceded, turning towards the door.
"Remus?" At Sirius' questioning tone, he paused, turning back to look at his friend curiously. "Did you mean what you said? Is it true?"
"I'm not one to lie about such matters, Sirius." Remus answered, smiling at his friend.
"Wow." Sirius grinned, ducking a slice of bread before grabbing Remus' arm tightly across the table, pulling him closer. "I mean, that's good." He smiled, glancing at Remus' lips momentarily before running away to grab the carrots, throwing a handful towards some Ravenclaws.
"Yeah, good." Remus grinned, observing the mayhem contentedly.
Review!!!!!!! You know you want to, deep down... And it is very true that Reviews do make me update faster (sad, but true). Over 30 reviews by the end of the month and I promise to have the next chapter up before 5th March! I know I'm asking for a lot, but my free time is a commodity at the moment, and so I need there to be a chance you wont make it to target!!! :D
PS. Check out my recent one shots!