Well guys, this is it. I hope you've enjoyed it. Keep your eyes peeled; I'll be writing an AU story next! (First attempt at AU, but it will be interesting, I promise!) Thank you to everyone that had me on Author Alert, Story Alert, any Favourites lists and, of course, those of you that reviewed. Every single one of you have put a massive grin on my face.
"How did we end up here?" James frowned across at Remus, who pulled his robe more tightly around his frame.
"This is all your bloody fault." Remus muttered, hopping from one foot to the other to escape the cold floors. "You and that bloody contract." Glancing at his watch, he looked up again at James, harsh inevitability playing at his face. "Its time."
"Right." James sighed, stepping closer to the grand doors that lead into the Great Hall. "On three?" Remus took a final deep breath, nodding at James anxiously. "One, Two, Three... Go!"
Each boy pulled one of the heavy oak doors open, before dropping their robes to the floor and entering rapidly.
Fast paced music rung throughout the great hall as the doors were pushed open, the entire Great Hall turning to watch as they swung forward. Laughter erupted around the room as Remus and James emerged, naked as the day they were born, and began jigging up the aisles between tables.
The journey to the head table had never seemed so long to Remus, who utilised one large hand to keep most of his dignity in tact as he weaved down the row separating the Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws. The words to God Save The Queen rumbled lowly from his chest, eyes focused solely on the plaque resting above Dumbledore's head.
Meanwhile, across the hall, James danced with mirth down the aisle separating Ravenclaw and Gryffindor (Neither teen was quite brave enough to chance the aisle between Hufflepuff and Slytherin; after all, a rather important part of the anatomy had far too little protection from flying missiles, hot porridge and nasty spells), waving to the people on either side. Though the initial 'reveal' had been rather too, well, revealing, the moment he had taken a step he had fallen into his element.
This exhibitionist malarkey isn't too bad! James grinned, blowing a saucy kiss at one of the older Ravenclaws, bellowing out the National Anthem with gusto.
The pair soon reached the teacher's table, where their suitably shocked professors sat. Dancing to the table, Remus politely offered his spare hand to Professor Sprout, who accepted with a giggle, whilst James bravely extended a hand to the headmaster.
"MISTER POTTER! MISTER LUPIN! What in Merlin's name do you think you are doing? I would expect this sort of behaviour from you, Mister Potter, but Mister Lu – Albus? Albus!" McGonagall called, standing up in shock as Dumbledore stood, stripping rapidly until all that remained was a pair of orange silk boxers. Taking James' hand, he led the pair down the aisle, in an unusual foxtrot/riverdance combination that James couldn't quite follow.
The moment Remus reached the end of the aisle with Professor Sprout, a sigh of relief slipped through his lips, and with a swift kiss on her hand he departed, sliding though the grand doors thankfully.
"Congratulations." Remus turned as he heard Sirius' voice, smiling as he saw the boy holding a large robe open for him. "Jolly good show, Messer Moony."
"Why thank you, Messer Padfoot." Remus smiled, stepping into the robe and letting Sirius wrap it round him, before settling back into a comfortable embrace.
"It's a shame the audience didn't get to enjoy you in your full glory." Sirius grinned, pulling the other grinning teen even closer to him. "It would have been quite a sight. Then again, you're far too ravishing in the buff, and lord knows that hag Lily has a hard enough time keeping her ugly mitts off you as it is."
"Charming." A voice behind Remus stated flatly. Turning to face the room's new occupant, Remus smiled at Lily warmly. "That was quite a show, Mr Lupin."
"I'm glad someone enjoyed it." Remus huffed, pulling the robe around his frame tightly.
"Oh Rem, don't look so embarrassed!" Sirius laughed, throwing an arm across Remus' shoulders and grinning into his partner's cheek. "All you had to do was run through there in the buff! Simple!"
"Dance, Sirius. I had to dance through there." Remus muttered, pulling away. "I'd like to see you try." Remus scoffed, before recognising the playful glint in Sirius' eyes. Moving away from Remus, Sirius threw the tie from around his neck, undoing the first few buttons of his shirt before pulling it above his head. "Padfoot…"
"Your wish, Messer Moony, is my command." Sirius grinned, pecking a suave kiss onto his new partner's lips before dropping his trousers and boxers, skipping into the Great Hall frivolously.
Throwing his hands aloft, Sirius joined James in his morris dance with Dumbledore, the patterns becoming evermore intricate as the song continued.
"Well." Lily muttered, looking at Sirius critically, an amused glint in her eyes. "I can see what it is that attracted you to him, Remus."
"Do I need to worry about you stealing Sirius away now? And here I thought I could count you out of his adoring fans…"
"Oh, have no fear, Remus." Lily rolled her eyes, reaching over to place a hand on Remus' arm as she continued drily. "My ugly mitts belong solely to you."
"Damn straight they do." Remus grinned back, before two sharp voices broke their thoughts.
"Oi! Moony! Get away from my woman!" James shouted through the open door, pointing an accusing finger at Remus.
"Evans! Get your filthy mitts off my Moony!" Sirius barked simultaneously, glaring at the redhead. "Honest to Merlin, Prongs, can't your girl take a hint?"
"My girl! What about your guy? He's over there being all charming and beckoning…" James replied, never stopping the intricate dance patterns that the three of them had settled into.
"Gentlemen, lower your voices this instant!" McGonagalll stormed down the aisle towards the two boys, her face pale with fury whilst here eyes seemed torn between mirth and unadulterated anger, her wand almost splitting under the tight grip of her left hand. "This is a school, not a Quidditch Stadium! Have some decorum!"
"Minnie!" James called, dancing away from Dumbledore and towards the Transfiguration teacher.
"We thought you'd never join us!" Sirius continued, dancing towards her opposite side. Minerva spun as the two circled her, struggling to decide which of the boys posed more of a threat, and therefore which should have the attention of the wand.
As she pointed the wand decisively at James, Sirius darted from behind her, snatching the wand from her grasp. "You could have someone's eye out with that!" Sirius grinned, throwing the wand into the waiting hands of Amos Diggory as he continued to frolic around his Professor.
McGonagalll ignored Sirius, instead focusing her attentions on the headmaster. "Albus! Albus, you must stop this insanity!"
"Sometimes, Minerva, one must let insanity run its course." Dumbledore stated, clapping contentedly as Sirius and James grabbed opposite ends of McGonagalll's scarf, using her as a makeshift maypole. "In ancient Greece, muggles used to play sports in the nude to assert authority. Highly interesting that, thousands of years later, two teenage wizards can find joy in a similar setting, don't you think?"
"But – the children!" She replied, trying to untangle herself from her multitude of scarves.
"The moment Mr Potter's assets were revealed to the room, Profanity shields ensured that anyone under 17 would not see anything they shouldn't." Dumbledore smiled, his eyes twinkling as McGonagall glared at him. "Do not worry, they shall run out of energy soon enough."
"Precious Lilyflower!" James called, continuing his dance. "Will you not join me in this wonderfully primitive display?" James asked, releasing the scarf and dancing towards the pair at the door. "The lack of clothing is rather freeing!" He finished, offering a hand to his lady.
"In your dreams, Potter." Lily mocked, though a small smile still formed on her lips as she took the proffered hand. James lifted her aloft, spinning her once before leading her to their makeshift dancefloor.
"What…?" Remus turned, spotting a tired Peter standing behind him. Peter shuffled forward, watching with confusion as a naked James waltzed with Lily, an equally naked Sirius dragged McGonagalll around the makeshift dance floor, and Dumbledore stood aside, clapping in time to the music. "You know what? I don't even want to know. I leave you lot alone for two days… Wake me up when… this… is over."
"I get the feeling you'll be sleeping for a long time, Pete." Remus grinned, as Sirius bound towards him, capturing Remus' lips in a fast, passionate kiss. Tongues twirled for a moment, both boys caught in the heat of the embrace. Remus pulled away slowly, remaining in Sirius' embrace as he turned to a thunderstruck Peter. "A very, very long time."
Fin.