A/N: Hm... I think I may have to up the rating for, like, two sentences in this one chapter. xD Tell me if you think I should (As a warning, Russia is being all random macabre... xD;;).

And thanks for commenting... It's pretty much the only thing that keeps me writing this fic. :3

"Well, we are friends now," Germany started, "so I may be able to talk him out of this…"

"That would be ideal," Japan agreed. "But what if he doesn't agree?"

Germany sighed, unable to come up with an answer. "Well just hope for the best, I guess."

"It's s-so c-c-cold!" the shivering Italy whimpered as he and his friends padded toward Russia's house.

"Q-Quit griping, Italy," Germany replied, his breath a misty, white fog. "A real s-soldier never complains, n-no matter how bleak the situation."

Japan sniffled, the frigidity making his nose run. "Y-You have to admit, it is quite c-cold, though."

"Y-Yeah..."

"Coming!" The shivering Axis waited on the icy porch as Russia hurried to the door.

"Ah! Good afternoon, comrades!" Russia greeted, letting Germany, Italy, and Japan inside. "Come in and warm up."

"I assume," Russia started, everyone situated in chairs around his flickering fireplace, "you did not simply come to say hello, da?"

"That's right." Germany sighed, trying to figure out a good way to introduce to the topic. "So... You know how America was acting at the meetings recently, right?"

"Of course," Russia replied chipperly. "It was almost as funny as my daydream about ripping out his entrails with a rusty spoon!"

Italy gave a soft whimper and sank back into the chair in an attempt to distance himself from Russia.

"Yes... Um," Germany finally continued, "we happen to know someone had pulled an April Fool's prank on him to make him act that way... But it wasn't intended to go past one day, and it obviously has. You didn't happen to...?"

"Ah, you think I continued this prank, da?" Russia replied, and Germany responded with a curt nod. "Well, I'm afraid you're mistaken. I did enjoy it, but I have better things to do than pull a practical joke on America... Like plotting his demise..." Russia chuckled creepily, making Italy whimper again.

"Are you sure?" Germany asked slowly.

"Da," Russia confirmed. "I didn't do it."

"All right..." Germany looked over at Italy, who by now looked very traumatized. "Well, thanks for your time," Germany ended, standing up and nodding at Japan and Italy.

"Ah, leaving already, comrades?" Russia responded disappointedly.

"Yes," Japan replied. "We need to figure out who's done this as quickly as possible."

"I don't see why you would need to do that," Russia said, standing up with a small, cracked grin. "After all, this prank is quite amusing, da?"

"It may have been at first, but it's gone too far now," Germany answered seriously.

"Too far?" Russia echoed. "On the contrary, I don't think it's gone quite far enough! Surely you wouldn't erase this scheme before it comes to fruition!" he exclaimed.

"What do you think the pranksters were trying to do?" Germany responded, dumbfounded.

"To completely destroy America's psyche, of course!" Russia replied as if it were obvious.

"I don't think that's what they were after..."

"But nonetheless, it is what they will achieve, da?" Russia said, making the comment sound like a threat.

"I refuse to let it go that far," Japan interjected, directing his cold gaze at Russia. "Now, if you don't mind, we'll be leaving!"

"Ah, but I do mind!" Russia replied with a grin, blocking the room's only doorway.

"You can't honestly expect to keep us here by force!" Germany exclaimed.

"Oho, I'm not expecting to have to imprison you here," Russia hummed in his cheerful-yet-nervewracking way. "I'd just like a promise from you, comrades, that you won't pursue this traitorous investigation of yours..."

"Why on earth would we promise that?" Japan demanded.

Russia laughed, making the already-crying Italy start shaking again. "Just because we are friends now doesn't mean I will stand by and let you defy me... Kolkolkol..." He pulled out a faucet pipe from his jacket and looked around the others in the room.

"Don't hurt me!" Italy wailed, waving a white flag that seemed to have come from nowhere. "I'll do anything!"

"So, you'll promise not to stop this scheme, Italy, da?"

"Y-Yes! Just don't hurt me!" cried Italy, still waving his white flag.

Germany sighed. "Russia, can we be reasonable about this?"

"I'm being perfectly reasonable!" Russia replied. "If I weren't being reasonable, you three would be bloody piles of flesh at my feet by now."

Italy flinched again, backing away from Russia.

Germany gritted his teeth, trying to figure a way out of this that didn't involve surrendering or breaking the alliance.

"I'll agree," Japan suddenly said.

"Wh-What?" Germany responded incredulously, turning to look at his Oriental ally.

"I'll agree not to ask any others if they were involved in this incident," Japan continued.

"Ah! Wonderful!" Russia replied happily. He turned to Germany. "Surely you'll agree, too, comrade?"

"I..." Germany looked skeptically at Japan, who nodded.

"If you can't think of how to word it," Japan offered, "just say what I said."

"I," Germany started reluctantly, "I won't ask anyone else if they were involved."

Russia nodded cheerfully. "And you promise?"

"I... promise," Germany replied with a sigh.

"Ah, well thank you all, comrades!" Russia piped, stepping to the side of the door. "Come visit soon, da?"

"Right..."

"Good job, Germany," Japan said once the three were a good distance away from Russia's house. "I'm glad you understood what I was doing."

"Well," Germany replied, "I really didn't. But," he continued, "I know you well enough to assume you're wording your way around things."

"That's right," Japan confirmed. "fWe—well, not Italy, but you and I—only agreed to avoid asking anyone if they were involved, not to stop investigating."

"Right... But how do we keep investigating if we can't ask any questions?" Germany asked, still a bit confused.

"We have someone else ask them for us," Japan replied.

"B-But we don't want A-America to find out we pranked him!" Italy interjected. "If he g-gets mad at me..." He trailed off, but his friends could figure out what he was thinking of.

"Tell me why we have to watch a stupid horror movie with him again?" Germany sighed as he, Japan, and Italy walked toward America's house.

"I've had just about enough of him wailing about it to me," Japan grumbled.

The Axis turned a corner, just a minute away from America's house now.

"Then why don't you just tell him tha—"

"—out of my house!" America's screaming cut Germany off, and Germany, Italy, and Japan looked over to see America looking angrily at Mexico, who was leaning nonchalantly against a nearby store's brick wall.

"I can go in and out of your house whenever I want to," Mexico was scoffing. "Not my fault you can't figure out a decent security system."

"How's this for security?" America roared, pulling back for a punch. Mexico managed to dodge in time to stay safe, but the wall behind her was much less fortunate.

"Get back here!" America yelled, chasing after Mexico.

The stunned Axis powers stared behind him, dumbfounded, at the empty space that used to be a wall.

"He won't find out it was us," Japan assured.

"But who would we tell," Germany asked, "that could keep it a secret?"

"We don't have to tell anyone else," Japan replied. "There's one more person in on our little 'prank'..."

"Of course!" Germany exclaimed. "Genius idea, Japan! We don't break our promise, and we still get to the bottom of this with his cooperation!" He paused.

"But... who was it that helped us, again...?"