Things not to do in front of: Yassen

by awesomehatyougotthere

Are you annoying? Do you have some sort of death wish? Then breaking these rules will garuntee a painful death! 10 Things not do to in front of Yassen, do it and die. A PROPER CHAPTER 4 is now up. Thanks for all the reveiws!

2. Chapter 2

Things not to do in front of: Alex

1) DO NOT go around haunting him, with buttons instead of eyes, saying: "I'm your other father, silly."

2) When you go on holiday with Alex, make sure your name is NOT Sabina Pleasure. Your Dad WILL be blown up.

3) When you have been shot in the chest on Air Force 1, and Alex is talking to you, DO NOT say: "Find Scorpia… Find your destiny…" The chances are he'll end up trying to shoot Mrs Jones… not that anyone likes her much any way.

4) DO NOT ask if he has any of that 'explosive' chewing gum left. If he says to you: "Yeah, do want to try a bit? It tastes like strawberries!" RUN.

5) When you are exchanging horror stories with him, DO NOT mention Yassen Gregorovich. He will wet himself with fear, get very embarrassed and beat you up.

6) DO NOT follow him around on missions or anywhere else for that matter, singing: The James Bond theme tune. Or yelling "Look, it's a teenage super spy!"

7) DO NOT hit him, then when he asks why you did so, say: "I was testing your reflexes."

8) DO NOT play the Beethoven disc on Alex's Discman, and end up cutting his leg off.

9) DO NOT steal his stun-grenade/football-mascot and 'accidentally' set it off on the London underground when standing next to him. Terrorist.

10) DO NOT pretend to work for MI6, and say: I know that all seven of your friends are terrorists, fortunately, I have had them all apprehended. Their names, as you know, are: Bin Sleepin, Bin Goofin, Bin Lunchin, Bin Drinkin, Bin Behind-the-shed- Kissin, Bin lazin and Tom. They have all been taken into custody.