Hi, everyone! It is I, Khaos! I know I haven't updated The Spark or anything else, but I got the idea for the second chapter of this and had to write it. I'll let you all know that by this weekend I will have updated all three stories on here and the story on my fictionpress account, so I have a very busy weekend, and it's all for you! (actually it isn't, it's for me, and my friend who will hurt me if I neglect to write, lol!) Any-hoo, onward to the wonderfulness that is my psycho story!
Disclaimer: (Erica, Lilly and I) We pown twilight!
Edward: Oh crap.
Lilly: That's right, Eddie-boy, be afraid! Team Jacob!
Erica: Team Jacob!
Me: PARINO JACOB!
Edward: What the hell was that?
All three of us: *Burst out laughing and die*
I choke out: Don-*gasp*-own-*gasp**laugh*-Twil-*laugh, gasp, scream* -light! *dies laughing*
Edward: *Calls Alice* Hey, can you tell me how to get to the asylum you were at before you were changed? I've got a little issue here...
Khaos POV!
"Oh. Crap!"
"That isn't-"
"It is-!"
"Then we must be in Forks!"
"NO DIP, ERICA!"
All three of us were now freaking out, and I mean, crying, hyperventilating, jumping up and down, the whole shabang. We were in a Twilight book!
Now, I know what you're thinking. You're thinking that you are a crazy fan-girl, and would kill to be in our places. Well, let's just say that this had been a dream of mine for two years-interacting with the Twilight vampires!- But now that I was actually here, I was terrified! I mean, how in the name of all that is decent are we going to get back home?
"Okay, let's not panic." Lilly advised, clearly panicking herself, "We'll just go inside, ask for-" she gulped, "Ask for Carlisle, and be on our merry way to LaPush, or wherever!"
"That's an okay idea, but-"
"IT MOST CERTAINTLY IS NOT!"
Both Lilly and Erica looked at me like I'd gone mad. There wasn't a snowball's chance in you-know-where that they were getting me inside that hospital.
"What's wrong?" Lilly asked, a frown on her face.
"We're not going in there!" I said, pointing at the hospital building like it was cursed, "I hate hospitals! If you guys are really my friends, you won't make me go in there!"
"Oh my gosh, Khaos! You're not actually serious, are you?" Lilly asked, skeptical, and a little pissed this time.
I glared at her in a manner that would convey my dead seriousness. She rolled her eyes and looked me up and down, from head to toe. She then turned to Erica.
"Help me drag her."
In a flash, Erica had knocked my feet out from under me with her Ninja Karate moves, and Lilly had grabbed me by the ankles and had started dragging me towards the entrance of the "Palace of Doom".
"NO! LET ME GO! LET ME GO YOU LITTLE BRATS! DON'T MAKE ME GO!" I screamed like a banshee, kicking and struggling against the star soccer players grip on my ankles. There was no way I was going into a place filled with the things from my nightmares. I hated needles, shots, anything of the like and there was no way they were getting me in the place where all of those wretched things were found!
"What in the world is going on?"
All three of us looked up in shock. Standing before us were the owners of the two expensive cars, the vampire stars of the entire saga. Carlisle and Edward Cullen were both staring at us like we were the craziest bunch of teenagers that had ever walked the face of the earth. I didn't mind.
I don't care what you say about Edward, seeing him and Carlisle was the happiest moment of the century. That meant I didn't have to go into the fricken' hospital!
"Uhhhh..." Lilly and Erica were at a loss for words. So was I, but unlike them, I was grinning like a deranged idiot.
"Hiya!" Erica blurted out awkwardly, only making the situation SO MUCH BETTER...I mean really...I blame her fricken' idiot cartoons. Happy Tree Friends has rotted her mind.
We just stared at each other for around a minute before Edward spoke up.
"Well, out of all the things that could be said at this point," He paused, staring at me in a manner that creeped me out a little, "I have to ask, what's with the wooden sword?"
I looked to my right, my sword was laying a foot away from me on the wet pavement. I grasped the handle of it tightly in my right hand.
"I actually forgot I had that with me. If I'd have remembered a minute ago, I would have-"
I cut off and as quick and as hard as I could, I smacked the sword onto Lilly's hands, which were still constricting the blood flow to my toes. She screamed in agony and shock, and as she was cursing me to the fiery pits of H-E- double hockey sticks, I spun around toward the Volvo and made a mad dash to the only hiding spot available.
"Take that, Lilly!" I screamed, adding on a bit of maniacal laughter at the end.
"Alright, what is going on?" Carlisle asked, really confused at this point.
We all looked at each other, at a loss for what to say. We were all just hoping that Edward would read our minds all ready and the explanation would be out there and done with. However, before anyone, including Edward, could say anything, Erica whispered in the most psychotic voice;
"I know you sparkle!"
Well, shit. Erica had put us on the path of no return in the sanity department, but of course, the moron decided to add just a bit more.
My short, crazy little pest of a best friend, stared at Edward in an extremely flirtatious way, batting her eyelashes to add to her "cute" effect, before adding the words that would be the last nails in our coffin as far as the Cullens and Volturi were concerned.
"Edward, I want to sparkle too!".
I stared at Erica from behind the Volvo. I was just about ready to beat her to death with that stupid sword, and I could tell that Lilly was thinking the exact same thing.
Edward and Carlisle, on the other hand, were taken aback in shock. They stared at us like we were the ghosts of Christmas Past, Present, and Future. If such a thing were possible, I would have said that they had gotten paler. But, being the vampires that they were, I guess they never changed.
Edward snapped his head in my direction, I was still standing behind his precious Volvo, sword at the ready. He looked like he was about to pass out or something, he was that freaked.
"HOW DO YOU PEOPLE KNOW EVERYTHING?"
Lilly and I looked at each other at a loss for words. Erica had gotten us into a very sticky situation. There was no way we were going to make this situation any better.
Then an idea occurred to me. We were in a book, for crying out loud! If we couldn't make the situation any better, than why not have some fun and make it worse.
I focused my mind on everything I knew about Bella from the series. Her first day at Forks, the famous Biology lesson, Edward leaving her, her fateful cliff dive, and most importantly, her thoughts. I flooded my mind with information from the first two books in the series, and watched as Edward's face turned into a mask of pure horror.
"HOW DO YOU KNOW ABOUT BELLA?"
I gave a very distraught Edward an evil look.
" We've kidnapped Bella, and forced her to tell us everything! She is our prisoner!" I screamed, hoping beyond hope that Edward was too love drunk to see passed my very obvious lie.
The blood-sucker bought it. I could see it in his eyes as his muscles constricted in stress and fury. He was Play-Doe in my hands. All I had to do was get him not to kill us. He looked as though he was ready to pounce.
I noticed Lilly looked the same way. I had pulled an Erica, and there was no way out of this mess now, and she knew it. So she joined in.
"The only way to get Bella back unharmed, is for you to bring us to your house, where...-" She paused, scrambling for an answer-"Where the rest of our, uh, group is waiting for us to make the hostage trade."
"otherwise," Erica stupidly added in, doing a crappy impersonation of the Governor of California, "Bella will be terminated!"
Edward believed every word that came out of our mouths, and wouldn't listen to any reason that came from Carlisle. His cold, dead heart was set on "saving" his true love.
And just like that, we got ourselves a ride out of there.
Khaos: Okay, so Erica is actually sitting next to me, (so she helped with this, like with the sparkle stuff; that was her idea XD) Anyway, we are dying laughing right now, and we can't wait to see what you guys think of our insanity. So if you review, make sure to put in a word of praise or whatever for EricaCrowe as well.
Erica: :D I have not even written my first fanfic on here yet soo, this is my first official notation on here, soo all I have to say for my psychotic self is I HAVE A FEATHER! AND IM NOT AFRAID TO UUUSSSEEEE IIITTT! :P
Khaos: She reminds me of Alice, short, funny, and belongs in the Asylum. ;D
Erica: WAAIIITTTT I FORGOT TO ASK BOUT MY HERO SETH! D: THAT MEANS WE HAVE TO WRITE MORE IM TOO LLAAZZZYYY! *faints*
Khaos: Er...we'll write more when she wakes up, *mutters under breath* and when her medication kicks in!