Chapter 4:
I woke up to the sound of heavy rain on the window. I opened my eyes and tried to sit up. I almost gasped when I saw what I had done last night. There lied Jake, laying beneath me, completely naked. I looked down at myself and my eyes widened. My clothes were all over the car and everything that had happened played in my mind. Embry and Quil had gone off with friends and I been driving Jake home when he told me to pull over. We agreed we would sneak around with each other and he had kissed me…we started removing clothes and Jake had said he was ready. I had grabbed my purse to find a…wow. Jake and I had…and he had wanted to…
I looked Jake over and realized I had been wrong about him. I always thought he was just a young, naive 15-year-old boy who didn't know a thing about girls. And as I skimmed over his body that was laying beneath me, I realized he is defiantly not a boy, he is a man. He knew exactly what he was doing and I only just thought to wonder if that had been his first or not. I desperately hoped it was, but I knew it defiantly wasn't mine. I had been 13 when my 'boyfriend' had convinced me to do…well this. The next month he dumped me.
Although somehow, I couldn't find any unpleasant memories from last night, like I had the first time. I hadn't compared Jake to him because he wasn't. Jake had cared, and I knew that's why I had so easily given in to my hormones. I wanted Jake to see that I do like him, and I wanted him to have a part of me. I sighed as I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes and smiled as Jake gave a little groan and tried to cover his face from the noise. I just giggled and looked over at the dash. The clock said 5:32 A.M. An hour of sleep, no wonder I was so tired.
I gave Jake a kiss on the lips and I could see his lips turn up and smirk. His eyes opened slowly as he took in both of us. He didn't look ashamed, or regretful, actually he looked…happy? Well I wasn't planning on that reaction. He tried to stretch in the little room this car provided when it had all of Embry's stuff in it. Jake wrapped his arms around my bare waist and kissed my lips again. I smiled and layed my head on his chest. I knew Billy would be worried sick about his son. I sighed and tried to sit up and put on the little amount of clothing I could find.
Jake did the same, and within a couple of minutes we were both sitting in our clothes from last night. We sat in a comfortable silence and we layed back on the small seat. I cuddled into his side and breathed in his homey scent. I smiled up at him and only then thought of how our parents were probably worrying about us. I sighed and sat up pulling Jake with me. I gave him one last kiss before we pulled ourselves into the front seats. I grabbed the keys from the back and started driving.
"You don't…regret last night, do you?" I asked quietly as I chewed on my lip and kept my eyes forward on the road. I could hear him chuckle and I looked over at him questioningly. He just smirked and shook his head. I saw there was something to the way he was just laughing, something he was nervous about. I could see he was dreading telling me.
"I could never regret it. I have loved you since I was 6. And since I was 13 I was determined to make you my first… Do you regret it?" He asked quietly back. I was his first. Well that defiantly made me feel special. I watched him in awe from the sweet words he told me and it made me glad I realized I loved Jake before I let Paul play with my head.
"Never." I answered back as I kissed him on the cheek and layed a reassuring hand on his knee. I could see him relax from the contact and it made me relax too. Jake didn't regret our time together. He didn't regret giving himself to me. I smiled and I felt a warmth in the pit of my stomach. Had the one person I had always been looking for been right in front of me? I couldn't believe I had been so blind.
"So does this mean you are my girlfriend?" He asked nervously as he starred out the windshield. I smiled. That defiantly didn't sound bad. Would that mean it should be kept between me and him? For now, I would say yes. Or should we say to hell to everyone and just come out together, tell everyone we love each other and we won't change that. Love? How come that label seemed so right?
"It does." I said surely as we pulled into the driveway to his small little red house. I knew the second we both got home, sleep was where we both would be. After a long and…tiring night we both needed to sleep and get our energy back. Plus it is only 5:30 in the morning, with only an hour of sleep I am surprised both of us are still awake.
"I'll call you later." He said happily as he leaned in and gave me a soft and loving kiss. I smiled and nodded as I waited for him to shut the door to his small little house before I drove away. I had always gone to Billy's to get away from mom or when Jake needed help with something. When Jake's sisters left a year ago I was left to help Jake with his homework and stuff like that.
I got to the house quickly, and I went straight to my room. I couldn't keep the grin off my face and I felt like I had just won a million dollars. When I walked into the room, Embry was asleep on his bed, his loud snores echoing in the room. I sat quietly on my bed and sighed, and as if Embry had super hearing he jumped up and looked around. I waved sheepishly and started grabbing clothes to change into.
"Where have you been? I thought you were just driving Jake home?" Embry demanded as he jumped up and followed me into the closet. I sighed and changed into a pair of cotton sweats and a loose tank top that ended just above my belly button. I could see Embry sinking my every move, and I knew being kinda sore from last night wasn't a good thing because he could probably tell.
"I did drive him home…" I trailed off. I had driven him home, it just wasn't last night, and it was this morning, more like 5 minutes ago. I wondered if Billy was worried. I am sure he was because of his only son coming in at god knows when. I walked out slowly and I could see the gears turning in his head. I knew Embry couldn't comprehend the physical attraction between me and Jake, the way his arms fit perfectly around me, and the way our hands matched up like two puzzle pieces. The way he would tighten his grip on my waist when I said his name…
Embry had told me every aspect of his sex life constantly. If he had a problem with a girl he would come to me. The farthest he had gone so far was making out and feeling up. He was always scared of girls as a kid. But Embry could never understand that I had developed early and I had already done everything possible. That's what 8th graders get for dating seniors.
I had never even begun to tell Embry anything that had happened with any of boyfriends or even my flings because that was way too weird, plus there wasn't much to tell. His name had been Shawn and he was 18, I was 13. He had shameless flirted for months when he finally came out and asked me. Of course, I had gotten a good rep for dating older. And when it started getting around that we had been sleeping together, he dumped me and claimed he barely knew me. It had hurt majorly. How would you feel when the one person you thought liked you dumps you because he was ashamed of you?
He had never been good to me, though I thought he was the best thing that had happened to me for a while. But I didn't know until after that he was a horrible person. He had gotten me pregnant twice, made me have 3 pregnancy scares, and 2 miscarriages. He hadn't supported me in any of my decision and now I could think back and be happy he dumped me. He hadn't been very good either, though it doesn't take much to get pregnant. Just one night of unprotected sex and a guy who can function, oh and of course a girl who had only been to health one year and had only been having monthly cycles for 2 years. I hadn't known we could actually make a baby.
Jake is 15, yet he knew more about sex than even Shawn, who had had it countless times, when I had been Jake's first. If Embry found out, I didn't know what he would do. All I knew was that he couldn't find out. I could see though, I had already said too much. I could see his jaw tighten as he synced me. I knew what he saw. I was sure my forehead was shiny from sweat, my clothes had been wrinkled and out of place, my head was messed up. I was probably glowing and kept a stupid grin on my face, and you could tell I was sore from something.
"You slept with him!" Embry roared. I could see he hated it, anytime I was with a guy he hated it. Although I understood this. Jake is his best friend, and I was his older sister. Regardless of me being friends with Jake and Quil too, it was a horrible thing for me to do. And since I had told him countless times that I had no feelings for Jake, he probably thought I was playing with his head. But that only made me mad, of course I love Jake! Although I had only realized it two days ago. Wow, two days. It didn't seem that long ago, maybe an hour. I could feel my body start to shake. "You used him!"
"I did not use him! I really like Jake! Actually I love him! I would never do that to him!" I yelled/whispered back. I felt a shot of pain go through my body with a flash of heat. My limbs quivered and I felt obnoxiously hot. I gave Embry a death stare as he was putting me through this much pain. How dare he!
"Just a week ago you told me you hated that he had a crush on you. Now all of a sudden your taking his virginity and now you love him? God damnit, Tala, how could you take his innocence and give him yours if you don't even like him! I know Paul-" I cut him off. How dare he talk about Paul! How could he bring that up! I could feel my body go through more pain.
"Don't you dare talk about Paul! You don't know anything about him! And I didn't give him my virginity, I haven't been the innocent little girl you knew since I was 13! Jake wanted too, and so did I! It's none of your business who I sleep with!" I yelled back and I couldn't help it. I ran. I ran down the stairs completely forgetting shoes and a coat and ran into the woods. I could hear Embry yelling after me but I couldn't help myself.
I couldn't feel my logical sense anymore and everything seemed crazy. I wasn't even thinking as I ran through the woods with my clothes from last night still clinging to me as the rain whipped by me. The intense pain had stopped and everything was moving past me in a blur. I didn't know where I was going, and I didn't actually recognize any real place until I got to the back of Jake's house. I sighed as I walked over to his back porch, which led to his bedroom door. I knocked on the small little door and it flew back. He looked at me sadly and threw me into his arms.
I smiled at him sadly in return and he pushed me toward the bathroom with a towel. I sighed and kissed him on the cheek before stepping into the freezing bathroom. I stripped down quickly and only stayed in the shower long enough to get clean. I jumped out and squealed, the room making my skin turn into Goosebumps. I grabbed the towel and ran back into Jake's room. I had stayed here so many times that I kept a small cluster of clothes in his draw. I pulled out an old pair of skintight skinny jeans and a gray sweater. When I walked in Jake was sitting on his bed with his head back falling asleep. I walked in quietly and snuggled up in his arms.
"What happened?" He asked quietly as he wrapped his arms around me and layed his cheek on my head. I could feel his heart beating and it was in time with mine. I sighed. This had only happened once before when Embry and I had fought so bad that I jumped from the second floor window and took off to Jake's. Billy let me a stay a couple of days until Embry and I had sorted everything out, but it was hard. I was 15 and young, and Embry was 13, he didn't understand.
I didn't want to be the goody goody kid that everyone wanted me to be. I wanted to be wild and crazy and sexy and an adult. So I had snuck in one of my boyfriends when Embry was at his friends. He walked in the next morning to find us both in my bed, half exposed. Embry had gotten so mad at me that I couldn't deal with it, so I took off to Jake's. Of course, now it defiantly meant more. Jake is my boyfriend, the one person I had actually felt butterflies for. I didn't want to just sneak him in, I wanted to have a relationship with him. Although, last night was amazing.
"Embry got mad because I never showed and he figured out that we slept together. He doesn't understand how I feel about you, now. I love you, and he can't see it. Embry had always had this image of me, of being the good girl who was going to wait till marriage and have a big family and be a stay at home mom. He didn't…he didn't know that I had been way beyond that point. So he flipped and he started talking about-" I couldn't tell Jake that Embry had talked about Paul and it hurt. I couldn't tell him I had actually felt something with him. It wouldn't be right. "…stuff."
"Well, I know that you love me. That's all that matters." He said as he layed a chaste kiss on my forehead. Even the one little thing meant the world to me. I smiled up at him. I thought of a great thought then. I jumped up, pulling him with me. I noticed that he had changed into a pair of jeans and brown pull over. I smiled as I threw his shoes to him and threw mine on. The heels weren't really a good idea for today, but I didn't care.
"Where are we going?" He asked as I ran out the door and started running to the road. I slowed when I saw the cliffs up ahead. I had always loved to walk around the cliffs and I remembered one thing from when I was kid. I completely ignored his question and continued to run up the cliff. I slowed down when I saw Jake slowing down and I grabbed his hand. Our hands fit perfectly and it almost made me cry. I had always wanted someone special, and now I found him. I could tell there was something deeper between Jake and I.
When we were about half way I felt an intent gaze on me I turned and saw Paul and Sam on the small cliff at the edge. I could see they were watching me and Jake and I immediately shied and I snuggled into Jake's side. I could feel their sharp gazes on us and I almost cringed, but I knew Jake wouldn't even notice them there. I didn't like the stare they were giving us. We moved higher on the mountain until we got onto the other side at the top. I smiled. The air was fresh as the morning sun was just coming up. I breathed and sighed.
"Jacob, do you remember the first time you had told me you loved me?" I asked hesitantly, hoping he could remember the one part of my favorite memory. I could see every detail of that day in my head, but I waited for him.
"Yes, you kissed my cheek, and said it was the sweetest thing you had ever heard. You said 'I'm too old for you. I have never liked cougars.' I had asked dad for days what it was." He smiled as he put his palm to the cheek I had kissed. I smiled at him. He did remember! I didn't know why I had wanted to show him some insignificant detail from the past.
"This exact spot is where you told me. You were 11. I was 13. I remember that day like yesterday, and the past couple of days I have thought about it nonstop. That was my favorite day, Jacob. And I thought since I had told you that I loved you today, I wanted to do it here, to make it fair." I explained as I stepped closer. I didn't know why, but I was nervous. I was actually nervous. I could feel the wind on my face as I stood in front of him.
"I love you, Jacob Black." He kissed my cheek.
General point of view:
Sam and Paul stood on the mountaintop, deciding to jump or not. It wasn't uncommon for them to come up here and cliff dive. It was the only thing that could pump a little energy into their viens other than hunting vampires. Paul was angry that he had to leave his imprint last name, his one true reason for existing, because of Sam. He had finally gotten close to her and Sam makes him leave. He couldn't get out of his head the image of her last night. She was gorgeous. He hadn't liked the way Jacob had looked at her, as if he owned her, or that he loved her. No one loves her like he did.
Sam understood that she was his imprint and he wanted time with her, but he also knew she was going to be a powerful wolf. He had heard her mind a couple of days ago from the street. Her mind voice had already been powerful in his head, and he knew any day she was going to change. He knew she was going to be powerful and strong, and an alpha. She could over throw him, and he knew she was already wounded from past experiences. He knew of what her mom was keeping from her. The stories of her father.
The identity of her father. Her father knew she was his, and that she didn't know that it was he. She had desperately wanted to know who he was, but her father had promised to her mother to keep it a secret. She was actually already close with him, believe it or not. She looked at him with a fatherly love that she didn't realize. She was his true child, though Embry was the spawn of another. Sam hated keeping something so important from a new wolf, which was due to change today. He knew she would hate him when she changed that he knew. He also knew, she was the alpha they had been waiting for.
Although her father's people were not alpha's, her mothers was. Her mother's people were strong lined alphas of all blood. In all the history there had been word of one true alpha that would live on forever and be the rightful pack leader. Everyone thought it was young Jacob Black, though he had not changed yet, but when Sam had heard her voice in his head, he knew it was she. She had already seen herself changed. She saw Sam in her head, a vision of the future that only one had ever been gifted with.
She had seen herself changed, and she would see all the new wolves change, again only one alpha had been gifted with that trait. Although she was not full Quiliete, she is half, and half Mahak. Her blood was twined with ancient power that had been stored and taken away from each alpha as they went on with their life. It was waiting to be awakened, and only she could awaken it. Her blood entitled her to the power, and it was said that she who had the second alpha for a mate was she who was to be changed. And as Sam watched her run up the mountain with the awaiting beta, Jacob Black, he saw her as the new power to be held.
Only she was the wolf that would pass on the gene of the spirit wolfs, spirit warriors, to her children as she still phased as her spirit wolf. She was the one who could be with child as she stayed in her true form. She was the only one who could watch over her children, all the wolf's who are her children, and still be her spirit warrior. She would be the one to give birth to the high power of which she and her mate conceive.
Paul watched with anger as his imprint walked with her new mate, and he hated it. He wanted to kill the poor boy. Tala turned quickly, sensing her other half's gaze and immediately shied into Jacob's protective embrace. She didn't like that she was hurting Paul, but she loved Jake, and Paul had hurt her. She hated the way they looked at her, as she was some kind of hero, like she was going to hurt everyone around her. Their gazed were conflicting, some with live, and the other with hate, but not to her.
Paul didn't want to hurt his imprint, but he wanted her, and she wanted him, so why Jacob? Why isn't it Paul she was enjoying her day with? Why is it he? Why?