Chapter 1
Astoria, Oregon

"Mommy I have ta potty" Shawn said as we drove through Oregon.

"Ok sweetie, the next rest stop is in 2 miles can you hold it baby?" I asked as I glanced at him from the rearview mirror. He nodded his head his blonde curls bouncing on his forehead. I smiled at the picture he looked so much like his father when he does that. We stopped at the rest stop and I took both Shawn and Alice into the ladies room because I had to change Allie's diaper. I was a paranoid parent and still thought Shawn was too young to go to the rest room himself while I was not waiting just outside for him.

Once the bathroom break was done I filled up the car once more and we continued on our journey to our new life. I was lucky that an old teacher was retiring and they had yet to find a replacement, small towns are hard to find employment in and I lucked out. I just hope that finding an apartment will not be that hard. Astoria, Oregon here we come.

I was lucky it was still summer vacation and had a few more weeks to get settled in before I have to start my new job. There was so much to do and not much time to do it. Shawn starts Pre-school this year and he needs all his shoots and Allie needs a sitter. I still need to find an apartment suitable for all of us, though I do have some lined up for viewing the after tomorrow. Once we find a place then the moving company I hired will load all our things from our old home and bring them here. With everything I needed to do running through my head I could not help but feel overwhelmed.

After a day of driving I pulled into the super 8 motel and proceeded to the check in desk. We would reserve a room for a week just incase I have a problem finding an apartment. Tomorrow we would venture into town and get to know the area. I want to map out the hospital, the High School, Pre-School, and a day care center. Those were the highest priority while I wait for opportunity to actually find an apartment.

It was 8pm when we finally went to bed after a late dinner. I wanted to wake up early so we could get started on our day. First we would head over to the hospital and see if I can setup an appointment for the kids to get their physicals and shots. With that plan in mind I set the alarm for 7:30am and kissed both my babies on the forehead before I laid down myself to sleep.

Beep Beep Beep

I shot out of bed startled my hand automatically moving to the alarm clock and shutting it off before I lay back down for a moment staring at the ceiling. I took a moment to go over my plans for the day. First we would go to the hospital and setup an appointment with the doctor for my babies, and then we would drive by the High School so I would know where it was, then the Pre-school and finally find a daycare center. Then we can take the rest of the day off and unwind from all the driving we have done for the past two days.

Plan in place I got out of bed and headed for the shower. I wanted to get ready before my kids woke up. I had really lucked out that Allie sleeps through the night. Once I was showered and dressed I woke up Shawn first and helped him bathe and dress before I did the same for Alison. An hour later we were on our way to a dinner for breakfast then to the hospital.

As with all other small towns everything was close by and the hospital was not hard to find. It was about the same size as the hospital in Forks and looked very well cared for. The parking lot looked newly paved and the parking area was still freshly painted. I found a spot as close to the hospital as I could get and started to put Allie in a stroller while Shawn took his position beside me hand on stroller bar. We walked to the trunk so I could grab a blanket; it was kind of windy this morning. Once I had the blanket situated over the stroller to block the wind we began walking to the entrance of the hospital.

The sliding glass doors opened as we neared automatically and we walked through. Shawn was wide eyed and interested, as he is with all new things. I directed his distracted mind back to me as we walked towards the reception area. Everything was clean and pristine white; like the parking lot it was clear the inside of the hospital was just as well cared for. Even the waiting room seats looked new.

"Can I help you?" a woman in her mid forties with short curly hair and freckles asked when we came to a stop in front of her desk.

"Yes, we are new in town and I need to setup an appointment with a pediatrician for shots and a physical." I tell her while angling the stroller so I am in front of the desk while still firmly in control of both Shawn and the stroller.

"We will have to have the children's medical records sent to us before an appointment can be set." She says while reaching for a sheet of paper and putting it in front of me. "You will need to sign this so their old doctor can release the records." I sign the papers, also putting my cell number down and hand them back "Once we receive the records Mrs. Jackson we will contact you." The woman said as she takes the paper and looks it over. "Thank you." I respond with nod in thanks.

"Have a good morning Mrs. Riley." A smooth and beautiful voice chimed as I turned the stroller around to face the door again and I freeze in place. That was a voice I would never forget, I could never forget. Still I was afraid to check to see if I was right, but it did not matter my suspicion was confirmed when she replied back. "You too Dr. Cullen, have a nice morning."

I was unsure of exactly what I felt in that moment. Shock definitely, but there was also dread, fear, excitement, happiness, sadness and many other contradicting emotions. I was so stuck in my whirl wind of emotions that I could not stop his name from being whispered "Carlisle?" I could feel my heart trying to beat out of my chest as I begin to have a minor panic attack. My breath caught in my throat even as I tried to calm myself down. It was a lot harder than it sounds, to calm down when you come in contact with someone or something you never thought you would see again.

I knew he heard me because he turned to see who called his name in such a way. I had never wanted to run from a Cullen more then I did at that moment. It wasn't because of fear I wanted to run, but because of the unknown. "Bella?" He whispered as he took a hesitant step in my direction. I could tell he was just as surprised to see me as I was to see him. His golden eyes had widened and his mouth dropped open for a split second before he got his facial features under control once again.

I inhale deeply steeling myself for this encounter and I turn stroller and closed the distance between us with a few steps. "Hello again Carlisle, it's nice to see you." My voice was steady and I felt proud of myself for this fact. I knew what it meant that he was here; if he was here they all were here. I was still unsure if I was ready for where this could lead.

"You as well Bella, you look good." He said and I could tell he was unsure of where to go from here. I could tell in the slight raise of his tone in his last word to me that he was in fact as nervous as I was. I could tell the receptionist is watching us with the utmost interest.

"Would you like to walk us to my car and we can talk?" I asked handing him the olive branch I knew he would grasp. If for nothing else then to sate his curiosity he would come. He of course would be dying to know about the children.

"Of course Bella" he said and stepped aside to allow me to lead the way to my vehicle. Once we were out the door he began his questioning. "So who are these beautiful children?"

"This is Shawn Emmett Jackson" I said motioning to my son "and this is Alison Rose Jackson" I said moving the blanket aside so he could see my blonde blued eyed baby girl. She got her eyes and hair from her father, while Shawn has his father hair and my eyes. I like all mothers thought my children were the most beautiful in the world. I was every bit the proud momma when it came to showing off my babies.

I could tell he was surprise so when he asked "You named them after my children?" I was not surprised. I nodded and answered "Yes, I wanted to honor their memory." I had wanted them to know even if I never saw them again that I still loved them as family. I knew that they would at some point check up on my life to see what had become of me and I knew they would find records of my children.

"Oh Bella" he said compassionately. "It's ok Carlisle. I got over the hurt and anger a long time ago, but I still love them all. You were all my family once after all." I said the last part in a whisper but I knew he heard me.

"Momma, who is he?" Shawn asked as he peeked out from around me at Carlisle. My Shawn was always a very curious child. Something he no doubt inherited from me.

I smiled at Shawn "This is Carlisle sweetie; he is an old friend of Mommy's."

Carlisle smiled at Shawn kindly "Hello Shawn it's nice to meet you." Shawn hid shyly behind me again.

"He's shy around strangers." I inform him as Shawn tugs my jacket to cover his face.

"Would you like to come to my home and see the others?" He asks and I feel my heart skip a beat at the prospect of seeing Edward again. I don't think I could do it. "Edward is not with us. He has not been with the family for over 4 years." Carlisle informs after no doubt hearing my heart react to his request.

"Ok, we will follow you in my car." I answered after hearing that the one I did not want to see was not there. Driving there myself would also allow me to get my emotions under control. This meeting was a great shock to me and I was in no way prepared to ever see a Cullen again.

"Great. The others are out hunting, but I suspect will be home soon." He says lightly with a small smile.

"Alice" I said with a light laugh catching what it was he did not say.

"Yes, I suspect she would be running home about now from where ever they are." He answered his tone amused.

"Are we going with Mr. Carlisle mommy?" Shawn asked tugging on my jacket sleeve to get my attention.

I turned my head to look at my son before I answered and leaned down to his height "Yes honey, we are going to meet your aunties and uncles."

"I have aunties and uncles?" Shawn asked in awe clearly surprised because being an only child he had never met any siblings of mine.

"Oh yes, you have 2 aunties and 2 uncles." I said holding up four fingers for him to understand how many total. My son was a very smart boy and I was so proud of him.

"Do you think they will play with me?" he asked shyly with a slight blush on his cheeks another habit he inherited from me.

"Oh yes, I'm sure your uncle Emmett would love to play with you." Shawn's eyes widened when I said the name Emmett no doubt recognizing it from his own name.

"He has the same name as my middle name!" Shawn was excited and happy.

I laughed as I stood back up "Yep he does. You were named after him."