Christmas in Atlantis Chapter 5: Last Christmas, a stargate: atlantis fanfic

A/N: This one isn't McKeller. The main character is one of ladygris' OC's and is used with her permission. It's also a two-song story and is not my usual fare.

I'm reposting it with additional scenes to give it a little more flavor.

Thanks,

Sandy

Last Christmas/I Don't Wanna Spend One More Christmas Without You

Estelle Monroe sat alone just as she always did, eating with one hand and tapping at her tablet with the other. This next spot of revenge had to be more creative than the last ones. Christmas is coming. Maybe I'll go seasonal and fill his quarters with coal. No, too easy to track.

Opening the supply requisition file, she started to put in an order and realized someone else had gotten there ahead of her. The item she needed had already been ordered by none other than Colonel Sheppard though he probably had another use in mind for it, one that involved the entire base. She saved the file and erased her "footprints" so no one would know she'd been there. McKay could do it and possibly Chuck but no one else would be able to find her tampering.

Here in Atlantis, Estelle was known as a quiet, nerdish, somewhat odd scientist but what she hadn't told anyone was that her brother was a world class computer hacker though the IOA probably knew meaning Mr. Woolsey knew. George had gotten caught a few times and sent to jail. When he got out this last time, some of the world's largest corporations had hired him to provide them with unbreechable firewall security. Ten years her senior, he'd taught her the business before she'd even graduated high school. All she had to do was sit back and wait until Sheppard's order arrived to pull out what she needed before it could be inspected. He'd ordered so much that he probably wouldn't notice if she only took one.

For now, she'd be content with messing with the programming of her ex-boyfriend's toilet and shower, switching out his uniforms for other people's clothes in the laundry and other harmless, yet infinitely funny, to her, pranks. As she gathered up the remnants of her meal, the refrain of a Christmas song went through her mind as it did every time she thought about him.

Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day, you gave it away
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special

She'd met newly-promoted Marine Lieutenant Tommy Stackhouse at last year's staff Christmas party. They'd dated for several months before he dumped her with a lame excuse. After that she'd seldom seen him with the same woman more than a few times. Mostly he'd been on his own or with his buddies.

Once bitten and twice shy
I keep my distance but you still catch my eye
Tell me baby
Do you recognize me
Well, it's been a year, it doesn't surprise me
Merry Christmas, I wrapped it up and sent it
With a note saying 'I love you', I meant it
Now I know what a fool I've been
But if you kiss me now, I know you'd fool me again

Scowling, she remembered how Tommy had found her under the mistletoe at the beginning of the party and had kissed her on the cheek. He'd been sweet and had stayed by her side the rest of the night then kissed her almost senseless at her door. She'd not so secretly enjoyed the envious glances some of the other women had thrown her way while she'd been in the company of one of the best looking men on the expedition. At least until their break-up a few months later. For some reason he'd disagreed with her methods when it came to matchmaking.

When she reached her lab, she called up the project she'd been assigned by her boss and got back to work.

Christmas Eve

Early Afternoon

In the middle of the night after the Daedalus had arrived, she'd gone to the main storage area, slipped in and out again without being caught. Taking the item back to her quarters, she'd packaged it and made plans to present it to the bane of her existence, Tommy Stackhouse.

The next morning, she was carrying the brightly colored package to her lab so it could be delivered after her shift when two of her co-workers sidled up on either side of her.

"Whatcha got in the box, Estelle?" asked Roy Nelson on her left.

"Yeah. Tell us. We promise not to tell." Mary Turner said from her right.

"Sorry. Not today." Estelle kept walking and wished they'd both go away.

"Well, well, well, Mary. It looks like our Estelle is out to Secret Santa someone and doesn't want us to know who it is." He obviously thought he sounded cagey but it came out as sarcasm.

"You could be right, Roy."

Estelle rolled her eyes. These two were constantly jibing her about everything from her bad hair days to her food choices though it stopped short of actual bullying. It was like being back in high school again, three of the worst years of her life even considering that she grew up with an abusive father and alcoholic mother. She'd gone off to the university and hadn't seen them in years, had no desire to though she did miss George.

"And she's right here listening to you talk about her as if she was invisible." What had been a neutral expression turned into a frown, her eyes darkening with more anger than the situation warranted.

Mary looked at her watch. "Come on, Roy. Let's let her alone to make her package delivery and go get some lunch."

The pair speeded up to walk alongside each other. "Great idea. I'm starving. Besides, we'll figure out what's in the box and who the object of her affection is eventually." They walked away muttering and laughing about the random EM pulses happening throughout the city and again the anger notched up just a little. "EM pulse" was their way of referring to her little pranks whether they were played on Tommy or someone else who she believed had wronged her.

Estelle watched them enter a transport and the doors closed. They always managed to get under her skin with their remarks. She thought about secretly recording them the next time they had sex in the lab when they were supposed to be working late then broadcasting it to the entire base but decided against it, at least for now. She held that idea in reserve for just before she rotated back to Earth for the last time.

Arriving outside the door she was looking for, she looked up and down the halls to make sure she was alone. She'd disabled the video feed for this area and it only took a moment to override the bioscanner to put the package down where he'd be sure to see it when he returned from his current mission.

As she made her way back to the lab, again that Christmas song played in her mind.

Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day, you gave it away
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special

"But there isn't anyone special and it's his fault." She'd said it out loud and startled herself when it echoed off the walls. There hasn't been anyone special since him and not many before either.

Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day, you gave it away
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special

Putting her hands over her ears, she tried to shut out the music but it kept playing making her think she really was losing her mind. The thought that she should probably go see the staff shrink briefly crossed her mind. However, when it got to the next repeat of the chorus, that's when Estelle realized that she'd reached the lab.

A crowded room and friends with tired eyes
I'm hiding from you and your soul of ice
My God, I thought you were someone to rely on
Me, I guess I was a shoulder to cry on
A face on a lover with a fire in his heart
A girl on a cover but you tore her apart
Maybe this year
Maybe this year I'll give it to someone special

Cause last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day, you gave it away
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special

Someone was playing Christmas music and she'd walked in just after the song had started. With a sigh of relief she booted up her workstation and opened her project file.

Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day, you gave it away
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special

And last Christmas
And this year
It won't be anything like, anything like

She tried to ignore the music but it was impossible. With the sweetest smile she could muster, she climbed off her stool, went to the player and ejected the CD.

Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day, you gave it away
This year, to sa -

Dropping the shiny circle on the floor, she tromped on it with her heel until it was broken into several pieces. The owner, Barry Williston, stared at her with open-mouthed shock. When her eyes met his, she shrugged and said, "Oops." Brushing her hands together in supreme satisfaction, she went back to work in the welcome silence.

Tommy Stackhouse trudged wearily down the hall to his quarters and hit the bioscanner with more force than necessary. It hadn't been a difficult mission but it had been hot and very humid, the kind that saps your strength and made you want to just lay on the beach with a cold Corona with lime in one hand and a bikini-clad girl in the other. He yawned as he pulled his boots off and tossed them into a corner. That's what kept him from seeing the box in the middle of the floor. He tripped over it and, unable to brace himself, came down on his left wrist. Pain shot up his arm to his shoulder.

Getting to his feet, he went into the bathroom and gently probed the area, wincing when it hurt though not enough to indicate a break. Using just his right hand he slipped on a pair of untied sneakers and headed for the Infirmary.

When he arrived it looked deserted. "Hello, anyone home?" Within seconds a nurse arrived. He'd seen her a few times but they'd never really met face to face like this. Taking in her dark curly hair and eyes so dark that they almost looked black, he wished they'd met long ago. She was petite, barely coming up to his chin and very slender. And very pretty.

"How can I help you, um…"

"Stackhouse. Tommy." To his own ears he sounded as if he was back in high school suddenly confronted with his long-time crush. He had to clamp down on an urge to stutter.

She pursed her lips to keep from grinning. "Well, Stackhouse, Tommy, what's wrong? You look too healthy to need medical care."

"What? Oh, uh, I fell." He held up his left arm to show the wrist was slightly swollen.

Taking his left hand in both of hers, she carefully examined him, her touch gentle as she probed the area. The warmth from her hands seeped into him and spread along his nerves until it had reached every nook and cranny.

"It may just be a sprain but we need to be sure." She led him to the scanner and positioned the arm. "Stay as still as you can." The scanner whirred as it moved back and forth over the injured limb.

"Nurse, uh…"

"Marie Cho." She supplied at his unspoken question.

"Marie. Do you think I'll be able to play piano when it's healed?"

She snorted. "Only if you were able to play before." Her back to him, she examined the scans as they came up on the screen. "That's so corny, Stackhouse, Tommy."

He chuckled, looking away from her with a shy smile. "Sorry."

"Don't be. Come with me." Marie led him to a chair. "It's just a sprain but I'll have Dr. Beckett take a look at it just to be sure."

As she turned away, Tommy called out, "Um, Marie…"

"Yeah?" She faced him again and his eyes were so full of hope that she immediately knew what he was going to say.

"You going to the party tonight?"

"Wouldn't miss it. Why?"

"Would you like to go…with me, I mean?"

Marie pretended to think it over. "I'd love to, Stackhouse, Tommy. How about I pick you up at your place say 1930?"

"Great!"

She smiled and left to get the doctor.

Christmas Eve

The Christmas Party

Estelle arrived at the party amid bright lights, music provided by the staff band and lots and lots of people. The Daedalus had arrived a few days before and had been invited to attend. She slipped a small package under the tree with the other official Secret Santa gifts.

Glancing around, she saw her department head with his wife. They seemed so happy together especially with their twins in their arms. Standing with them was Colonel Sheppard holding hands with one of the medical doctors, Amanda something. Also there was the Athosians, Teyla with her son and his father. Ronon was sitting beside Amelia sharing a table with Chuck and Laura Cadman.

Even most of the crew of the Daedalus seemed to have someone to talk and laugh with. Watching from her spot off to the side made her lonelier than she already was though she kept a smile on her face as best she could.

It all came crashing down when she saw Tommy coming in with that Asian nurse whose name she couldn't remember. They looked very cozy, almost intimate. She pushed her cup of punch at the first person she came to and rushed out onto the patio. Normally the weather around the floating city was mild but tonight it was downright cold to a southern girl like her and she hadn't bothered with a jacket when she left her quarters. Wrapping her arms around herself she stood near the rail and just watched the clouds scudding across the sky obscuring the moons.

Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day, you gave it away
This year, to save me from -

Estelle felt the sting of tears again and let them fall. She was tired. Tired of being mad at Tommy for dumping her. Tired of playing pranks on him and everyone else who crossed her. Tired of not having a family to go home to for the holidays. Tired of not having any friends. But most of all, she was tired of being her.

She scooted a chair close to the railing and climbed up to sit on the top ledge, her feet dangling in the air. All it would take was for her to lean forward a little, just enough for gravity to take over. From this height, hitting the water would be like hitting a brick wall. She'd never survive.

Bracing her feet against the cross slats, Estelle looked down at the water. It roiled and undulated in the faint light from the city at night. Her backside slid off the edge of the handrail and she let go.

Kevin Marks watched the young woman standing off the side not speaking to anyone. She looked so sad he headed in her direction to see if he could cheer her up. He'd only taken a step or two when she came toward him abruptly thrusting her cup of punch into his hand then stumbling out onto the patio. The quick glimpse he'd gotten of her face showed that she was crying. He set the cup on the nearest table and followed her out into the cold night.

Just ahead he saw her climb onto a chair, sit on the handrail and swing her legs over. A seasoned soldier, it only took a moment to assess the situation. Rushing forward, he looped both arms around her waist just as she pushed off. He brought her back onto the solidity of the deck tightening his hold when it appeared that she was prepared to struggle. But to his surprise, she began shaking, her tears turning into sobs. Not knowing what else to do, he simply turned her around and held her against his chest while whispering gently to her.

The sensation of falling stopped abruptly when two strong arms grabbed Estelle around the waist and pulled her back onto the patio. Warmth pressed against her back as those arms tightened even more holding her close and she suddenly realized what she'd been about to do. She started shaking and a male voice spoke to her, the rumble of it vibrating against her back as she began to cry again.

"Sh! I'm here. I won't let you fall." He turned her around and let her cry against his chest, not seeming to care that his shirt was getting soaked. His voice just kept whispering soothing words, one hand rubbing up and down her back as if he were comforting a child while the other just held her close until the sobs slowed and finally came to a stop.

Estelle's arms were trapped between them and she used that position to push him away enough to look into the face of the man who'd stopped her from doing something incredibly stupid. "Th-thanks."

One side of his mouth lifted in a half smile. "No problem. Rescuing damsels in distress is a hobby." Keeping one arm around her, he fished a red and green napkin out of his pocket. With a grin and shrug, he handed it to her. "Sorry it's not a handkerchief."

Shrugging back, she dried her cheeks and blew her nose. Stepping out of his embrace so she could see him more clearly, she gasped at the mess she'd made of his shirt. "I-I-I'm sorry, Major. I didn't mean to…"

"I'm just glad you're okay." He waved away her apology and stuck out his right hand. "Kevin Marks. I'm here with the Daedalus."

His much larger hand enveloped hers, the warmth from that touch traveling up her arm, across her chest and up to her face turning her cheeks pink. She was mesmerized by his eyes. Eyes that she knew had seen just as much pain and suffering and violence as she had in her years on Atlantis, yet somehow he'd managed to still retain his poise and self-control. Or at least gave the appearance of it.

"Um, this is where you tell me your name."

"Oh, sorry. Estelle Monroe. I, uh, work for Dr. McKay."

"Brave woman." Kevin smiled at her and gestured toward the Rec Room door. "I don't know about you, but I am freezing my backside off. Would you show me the way to whatever there is that's hot to drink?"

"Sure. Major Whitaker always makes his special hot spiced rum punch at Christmas. Um, unless you're on duty."

He shook his head. "Not tonight. I was lucky enough to get the next few days off." Kevin poured them each a steaming mug of the punch then led the way to an empty table. He held her chair, not even Tommy had done that, and scooted close so they could talk over the music without shouting. "So tell me, what was that all about?"

"I-It was just me being stupid." She looked down at her hands wrapped around the cup. "Um, thanks again."

"You're welcome." They sat in silence for a few moments sipping their drinks. The band took a break and piped in music came on. Kevin listened and smiled when a slow, romantic Christmas song came on. "I don't want to impose, but would you mind dancing with me? I love this song, but I'd look really idiotic if I got up and slow danced alone."

Estelle watched him a moment trying to gauge his sincerity and all she saw was honesty, nothing was hidden. Nodding, she took his proffered hand. Out on the dance floor, he held her in the classic dance pose, not so close as to make her feel uncomfortable but not so far away that it looked like he was dancing with his sister.

This is the time of year, that we learn to give
And the greatest gift is learning to forgive.
We will have the best that time we ever knew
If you forgive me and I forgive you

I don't want to light a fire
Unless it will warm your heart
I'm playin no holiday songs
I need you to sing your part
And baby if I could have just one wish come true
I don't wanna spend one more Christmas without you

It's so hard to believe
We're staring at the end
When all we think about is starting up again
Whatever we lost, when we were apart
We'll find it all alone in the dark

I don't wanna light a fire
Unless it will warm your heart
I'm playin no holiday songs
I need you to sing your part
And baby if I could have just one wish come true
I don't wanna spend one more Christmas without you

There's nothing more that I want from you
Then to lie here together
And stay here forever with you
There's no one I ever knew
That I wanted to spend Christmas with, more than you...

They danced until the music changed to something faster then went to get something to eat. Standing in line, they talked about many things. Mostly nothing that had anything to do with work. He was much taller than she and when she tilted her head back to keep eye contact, she saw a sprig of mistletoe hanging over his head. She pointed it out with a smile and motioned for him to lean down. Aiming a kiss at his cheek, she was startled when he turned his head at the last second so their lips touched. It was only for a few seconds, but it was enough to make her breathless. Covering the nervousness with a smile, she reached for a plate just as he did and their hands touched. He smiled and shrugged as they moved down the line.

Estelle and Kevin spent a lot of time together while he was on leave and by the end of day three she'd completely forgotten Tommy Stackhouse except as a footnote on one very short page of her life. Not that she thought Kevin was going to fill that space, but it was nice to dream of having that with someone. But more than that, it showed her that she'd wasted too much time pining for something she would never have.

Going forward, she vowed that her life would be different. If she didn't have friends, she'd make some. If she didn't have family, well, she wouldn't let it bother her anymore. She also came to the realization that she didn't need a man in her life to make her feel complete though she wasn't adverse to the idea of having one whether he stayed for three nights or forever.

As for her parents, she wasn't quite ready to forgive them for all the things that had happened to her and George while they were growing up. But at least now she felt like some day she could forgive and for the first time in longer than she could remember, she'd actually enjoyed the holidays. And it was all thanks to Kevin Marks.

When the Daedalus pulled out a week later, he'd taken her email address. If he emailed her, fine. If not, also fine, though she knew which she preferred. Though she knew he couldn't see her, she waved as the ship lifted off the pier and rose up into the sky until she couldn't see it anymore. Just before she calculated they would enter hyperspace, her tablet beeped indicating she had an email.

We'll be back around Valentine's Day. Save me a dance.

Kevin

End

A/N: "Last Christmas" is a song by British pop duo Wham!, released on Epic Records in 1984. It was written by George Michael, one half of the duo. The song has been covered by many artists throughout the years.

Sorry. I wasn't able to find the composer for "I Don't Wanna Spend One More Christmas Without You." It's sung by 'N Sync.

Thanks again to ladygris for allowing me to use Creepy Estelle in this story.

~ Sandy ~