I own nothing...
I hope I have not bitten off more than I could chew.
I want you guys to like this- and I want to do this in the most effective way possible. So bear with me?
Nathan stares at the mirror and gives it a small smile. His eyes are rimmed red, the dark circles stand in stark relief against his translucent skin. Just like Dr. Spencer Reid.
He blinks, never more exhausted than he feels at this moment. His body wants to cave in as he grips the handle of the faucet, blood dripping down into the sink, making small swirls of copper in the darkening water.
He sighs, remembering the feel of Spencer's life flowing through his fingers. Ribbons of red as his chest rise and fall, shallow breathing until his brain, his lungs, his heart stops.
He didn't mean to. He really didn't. But he saw them.
He saw Reid kissing Morgan. Reid doesn't belong with Morgan and they all know that!
It was Nathan who had a bond with Spencer Reid. Spencer cared about him that way, not Morgan. This was not how it was supposed to go. He was supposed to meet Dr. Reid at his house and Dr. Reid would be all surprised-like and welcome him in and then Nathan would kiss him and then everything would be okay, because he belonged to Dr. Reid and Dr. Reid to him. He knows this. Morgan knows this and he's being selfish and ignorant and just...
Nathan couldn't help himself. He needed to...
Oh God! Reid's dead. Reid's dead by Nathan's hand and he can't take it back!
His stomach knots in sickness as the images flood his head, the rise and fall of Reid's chest, the rapid blinking as he tries to fight the pain. The feel of the switchblade, sticky with crimson heat. His stomach heaves. This wasn't what was supposed to happen. This is WRONG.
He was going to show Dr. Reid that he was better now and that he wasn't sick and that he wasn't afraid of his mind anymore and that he could control those disgusting urges and that they were meant for...each other.
He scrubs at his hands, but the blood won't come off. He'll never be clean again.
A/N: So...what do you think?