Chapter Seven – Stuck in Sinking Sand

EPOV

Bella wasn't happy anymore.

What does a person say to that. What do you say after your wife admits that she isn't happy being with you anymore. On some level, I knew she wasn't happy, but I just didn't want to face the reality of it. Would she leave me?

Bella and I have been together for ten years. Eight of those years we have been married. I know I haven't been around much and I know that things have been strained between us. But I never thought that she was, this unhappy. Granted, I was hardly ever home to monitor her moods.

Bella was nearly at breaking point. I could hear it in her voice and I could see it on her face. She was out of fight. Bella just looked empty now and it broke my heart knowing that I was the cause of it. I had always just assumed Bella would always be there. But it wasn't like I planned things to be this way. She married a soldier. And as a daughter of a soldier herself, she should have known what she was getting herself into when she married me.

We haven't spoken since her big statement. For the last three days we had avoided each other. I watched Bella get on with her usual routine of picking and dropping of the kids to school and after school activities. I watched her go off to work and come home and cook and clean. I tried to help out in some areas. Offering to make the bed or help her cook. But she just brushed me off.

I few times I had noticed her staring at me. Like she wanted to say something or that she was waiting for me to say something myself. I wanted to. I wanted to say something that would fix this. That would make all this distance between us disappear. But I had no comfort for her at the moment. My hands were tied. I was a soldier. It's who I am. Without out it, I couldn't breath. But I couldn't lose Bella and the kids either. One thing was for sure. I had to return in a week and a half and complete my tour.

There was only a couple more months left on my tour. But it didn't sit right with me leaving Bella after she had just admitted something like that. For the first time in our marriage, I felt that it was really in danger. I mean sure we had our fights, our differences, but I had always thought that we would get through them. But as it turns out. I was very wrong.

Bella was at work and there wasn't anything for me to around here, so I thought it was time I went and saw my parents. Carlisle had requested a transfer, when Emmett, Jasper and I had been stationed here. Mum and him, wanted to be as close to us as they could. Dad was a sought after doctor and the base was all to happy to have him.

I pulled into my parents drive a little after lunch. Mum and Dad didn't live on base, preferring to live just outside of it. They weren't far from the base gates though. It was easy for Dad to get to work. My mother Esme must have seen my car pull up outside, because she was in my arms even before I was out of the car.

"Hi, Mum" I said, wrapping my arms around her and inhaling her lavender scent.

"Oh, my boy, I missed you so much" she said, tears in her voice. It wasn't easy for her to have two sons and a son in-law away, facing a war.

"I missed you too, mum" I whispered, pulling her more tightly to my frame.

Bella used to greet me like this when I came home from tours or leave. But I hadn't felt that from her in a long time now.

"Come inside. I'll put the kettle on and you can tell me how you are" she said, grabbing my hand and pulling me inside the house.

Things hadn't changed since I was last home. Furniture was still in the same place as it was when I left. Esme was still the same loving and caring mother that she had always been. I desperately needed her advice. If anybody knew what was going on in Bella's head, it was another army wife. I would talk to Dad later. He could give me some perspective from the other side of things. I hoped he could tell me the secret of how he managed to keep his dream of being a soldier, whilst still being what he needed to be for his wife and kids.

"So, where's Dad?" I asked, taking the cup of black coffee she had made for me. Black. Just the way a soldier likes it.

"He should be home soon. He just went out to pick some files up from the base" she answered.

After a long uncomfortable pause, with my mother watching me with those oh too knowing eyes. She knew something was wrong. She finally asked.

"What's wrong. You look sad. Shouldn't you be happy that you get some time with Bella and the kids?"

"Mum, can I ask you a question?" I asked, not quite sure how to say what I have been thinking about the last couple of days.

"Sure, you can ask me anything. You know that" she answered. Esme was always so supportive.

"Were you ever unhappy with Dad? I mean, did you ever hate this life?" I asked, shifting my eyes around the kitchen. I didn't want to see her face when I asked it. It would be shock, I bet.

"No, I was never unhappy being with your father. I won't lie and say that it was easy. There were times when things were hard for us. Both as people and as a couple. But I was never unhappy. I never thought about leaving him, if that's what your asking. Is this about Bella? Do you think she's gonna leave you?"

Esme came around and placed her arm around my shoulders. She was trying to be comforting and it just made me sadder.

"Bella and I got into a fight a couple of days ago about me going back in two weeks and she told me that she wasn't happy anymore" I explained. It hurt just relaying it to my mother.

"Oh Edward, I'm sorry" she said, rubbing my back.

"I just don't know what to do. Being in the army makes me happy, but it's making Bella unhappy. I can't seem to get the two sides to meet" I told her, running my hand through my untamed hair.

"I can't tell you or Bella what to do, but I will tell you this. This life is hard for both a soldier and the ones left behind. You might make the sacrifices with your life, but she makes all the other sacrifices. Your a good soldier Edward, but you need to try and balance that with being a good father and a good husband" she said, moving to sit in front of me.

"So, basically your saying that I need to spend some more time at home."

"I'm saying that, you need to put a little less effort into one and a little more into the other. The army will always be there Edward, maybe Bella won't be. Talk to your Father, if anyone knows how to live two lives, it's him"

Just as Esme had finished her speech, Carlisle walked through, into the kitchen.

"Edward, I didn't know that you were back. Everything good, son?" he said, as I got up off the stool and gave him a hug.

"Got back a couple of days ago. Could we talk?" I asked.

"Sure, let's go to my office" Carlisle said. His forehead creased in worry. He knew something was wrong with me, just like Esme did.

I followed after him, hoping that he knew a way to fix my marriage, because I sure as hell didn't.

Hello, my lovelies

Here's the next chapter for ya.

I wanted to give a big thanks to y'all who are reviewing.

I pushed this chapter out of me just for you guys!

Just to let you know, that I don't plan on repeating chapters through the whole story, things will change once Edward goes back to Afghanistan. I just wanted to do it this way at the start to help set up the foundation of the story.

I thought it was important at the beginning, that you really know both sides. See things, how their seeing them.

I wanted to show that their not communicating and this lack of communication will make more sense later on in the story.

Keep up the reviews. I'm loving them!

Love

Nicky88