I have always viewed marriage as a sign that a person is ready to settle down and have children. That's exactly how I felt when I married Randy. We had two children: Shelly and Stanley. Everything was going well and then, everything changed.

If I had known Randy wasn't ready to settle down himself, I never would have married him to begin with. Then again, we were both young at the time of our wedding and when some people are young, they think they've found the life they want. For a long time, we loved each other to the point where we thought we would grow old together and die together. Then, somewhere along the way, our personalities just took off in different directions.

In the argument that clinched our futures, I pointed out just a few of his recent activities that I disapproved of, including the latest one: an attempt to hit it big in the crappy tween wave genre of music. He finally admitted that the reason he was doing all these crazy, immature things was he had been unhappy for a long time and wanted to enjoy the time he had left. At that moment, I realized I was unhappy too. It only made sense since I couldn't remember the last time I got on board with something he did, especially if it was exciting.

I told him people get older and thus, grow apart. I had grown up and he was regressing back to a young, crazy kid. The equation just didn't add up. We had to get away from each other, so we did.

I don't think Shelly and Stan took the news well, but neither one has shown much emotion about it. I'm particularly worried about Stanley. Ever since his 10th birthday, he's become really quiet and doesn't socialize anymore, not with Eric, Kenny or even Kyle. This newest development in his life can't be helping things, but if Randy and I weren't happy together anymore, how could we keep living under the same roof, much less sleep in the same bed?

Yes, we divorced once before, but only cheap makeup sex in Stan's clubhouse got us back together. The wounds are much deeper this time, meaning there's even less of a chance that our problems can be fixed. If we both adjusted in order to satisfy the other's expectations, we'd both become people we don't really want to be. Our decision is regrettable, but it's best for everyone, including our children, whom we'd rather they have split parents than parents who are together, but always have conflict come between them.

I wish we didn't have to sell our beautiful home, but if I'd stayed there, too many memories, painful ones, would have come up on a regular basis. There was no way I wanted to live with that possibility. Randy packed what he had in a truck and left first. The kids and I packed up the rest of the house before we moved out ourselves.

Our new house may be a house, but it still doesn't quite feel like home. For me, our real home is where we lived before. We moved because we were just getting away from a previous life that ultimately ended in heartbreak. It is for that reason that we can't go back there.

We're all in a deep funk right now, but we have no choice but to weather the storm. It's going to take some time, but I know we'll do it. I need to sleep easy again and my children need to be optimistic again. We'll have our good days and bad days, but in the end, we're family and we'll always have each other.