1Chapter7: The Real Reason Alice Was in an Insane Asylum

Disclaimer: So, I had the rights to Twilight but then The Phantom of the Opera decided he didn't like me. So he phantomed into my room, stole the rights to Twilight, and gave them to Stephenie Meyer. So, she owns Twilight not be.

(AlicePOV)

I can't believe someone would actually shop here! Oh, no! Did that tag just say 100 percent polyester?! Gross! Oh, well. I guess not everyone can look fabulous all the time. At least I can make sure that Bella can!

Well, if I'm going to hide in a rack, it might as well be one that isn't filled with completely hideous clothes! This one doesn't look too horrible.

Glancing around me to make sure no one was watching, I quickly ducked into the middle of the square clothing rack. Once in, I turned around and arranged the clothes to where no one could see me. Now, all I had to do was wait.

I waited, and waited, and waited. Finally, after about 15 minutes of waiting, a woman in her mid-sixties started browsing through the ugly clothes. When she finally started going through the clothes next to me, I jumped out yelling, "Pick me! Pick me! Pick me!"

"Oh my lord! Jesus save me!" The lady screamed before dropping the clothing items she had and running away. Very quickly for a human, I might add.

Now, for the next prank. The prank that in my opinion was the best on the entire list!

I decided this prank would be best preformed in the front of the store, near the checkout lanes.

"How could you do this to me?" I asked to the air, pretending to talk to someone. "I thought you loved me! What's her name? Huh? Oh, don't pretend like there isn't another girl! I'm not stupid! No, I will not stop yelling! Well, maybe you should have thought about that before you did that with her!" With this I began to cry, loudly.

"Well, no more! I'm done with this! I'm done with you! I'm leaving you! Don't touch me!" I pretended like someone was trying to grab my arm and acted like I was kicking someone. "No! Don't!" I then fell to the floor like someone was beating me. " Ow! Stop! Leave me alone!" I was now rolling on the floor, pretending to be in pain. After a few minutes of this, I finally got up and walked away. Pretending like nothing happened.

As soon as I was in an empty aisle, I began to shake with laughter. Soon, Jasper joined me. Apparently, he had been standing nearby watching.

Once the laughter finally subsided, I decided it was time for Jasper and I to find a nice janitor's closet for some alone time.

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END CHAPTER

Author's Note: So, I hope you liked the chapter. So sorry it took so long to update! I just really wasn't in a writing mood. Special thanks to ForeverTwilight-Nikki for PMing me about being so slow. I got her PM and I decided to write the rest of this chapter (I had half done already). I guess I just needed a little push. The good news is that it won't happen again! When I was writing, I finished this chapter and couldn't stop, so, I ended up cranking out two more chapters. Which means I have all of this story done! Yay me. I'm beastly. The next chapter is Rosalie's POV then there's a short epilogue. I might not get the last two chapters out tonight. They are written, but I hand write all my stuff, so, I just have to type them. Should be out by tomorrow, probably today though. Depends on if my dad is bugging me to get off the computer. So, I'm gonna go type the last chapters up! ~ twilighters-anoymous