DISCLAIMER: That part of this world and those characters you've seen before belong to their Creator: JKR. The rest is mine - although I cannot quit my day job as I make no $$$
A/N: To answer how I can update so fast: (1) I am on vacation and (2) much of this was already written ages ago and is merely being revised to fit the final version of Book I and the progression of this story. Someone (not that I was surprised) reminded me Lavender was wrong about her statement about what was in or not in scripture. So? That is what she thinks. It is arguably a perception some magicals may have. Unless I missed something, I never held her out to be a theologian.
CHAPTER EIGHT: POTIONS MASTER
MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 2nd, 1991 – HOGWARTS SCHOOL OF WITCHCRAFT AND WIZARDRY, SCOTLAND, U.K.
Sally Anne sat at the Gryffindor table across from Lavender and Parvati at breakfast the next morning. She had been dragged out of bed at what she thought was an ungodly hour and then dragged outside where the other Club members had gathered. The morning workout consisted of a lot of stretching, which she did not mind, followed by a run. She had not been expected to do much of that back in her school in Nottingham and although she and the other Muggle Borns only had to run about a mile, it seemed like a marathon to her. And then she heard the other students typically ran three miles.
"You do that every morning?" she asked as she put her breakfast on the plate.
Lavender nodded. "It's not loads of fun. But being in good physical condition makes magic easier, so we suffer through it."
"There are actually people who like doing that," Parvati said with a bit of a huff.
"Like who?" Sally-Anne asked.
"Harry," Lavender said. "He ran competitively at school."
"Guess that's one good reason not to be his girlfriend," Parvati said.
"Oh?"
"Hermione was on the Juniors Swim team…"
"As was Harry," Lavender added. "Hermione was better, though."
"Still, it does wake you up," Parvati said.
"I suppose," Sally-Anne moaned.
"Excuse me young ladies," a voice said. The three looked up and saw Professor McGonagall. "I have your schedules for this term." She handed each of them a slip of parchment and the three girls looked them over.
"What's the damage?" an older girl asked. Lavender and Parvati knew her from the Club and introduced Sally-Anne to Katie Bell and her friend Leanne Tinker.
"We got Transfiguration first thing," Parvati said.
"With the Huffelpuffs apparently," Lavender nodded.
"It's one of the better courses here," Katie said. "McGonagall teaches over the summer, you know." The latter comment was for Sally-Anne as the other two already knew that from the past summer.
"Defense right before lunch," Sally-Anne said.
"That course is rubbish," Katie said. "Just try and get by and wait for summer to learn it proper."
"That bad?" Lavender asked.
"They never have a professor for more than a year and we aren't really allowed to learn anything useful according to the older kids. Who's it with?"
"Slytherins," Parvati said.
"Club ones are okay. The rest are a right pain."
"Charms with the Ravenclaws after lunch," Lavender noted.
"Another good course," Leanne said, "as is Herbology. The rest are barely worth attending. Of course you still have to."
"So that's it for today?" Katie asked.
"And Wednesdays and Fridays," Lavender said.
"Not too bad. What about the other days?"
"Three hours of Herbology with Huffelpuff on Tuesday morning. Three hours of Potions with Slytherin Thursday morning…"
"Figures," Katie said. "I think they do that on purpose."
"What?"
"I think every year we get stuck with the Slytherins in Potions."
"And that's a problem?" Sally-Anne asked.
"Professor Snape teaches it and he's nasty," Katie said. "He's head of Slytherin and hates us Gryffindors on principal. Add to that the non-Club Snakes are just as nasty and it's not a pleasant experience."
"Has he ever given a Gryffindor points?" Leanne asked.
"Not that anyone knows. If he has, he was probably under the influence of some mind altering potion. On the other hand, he gives Slytherins points for showing up."
"Surely it's not that bad," Parvati said.
"It's only a slight exaggeration," Katie replied. "Fortunately, there is the summer. And Tuesday and Thursday afternoons?"
"History of Magic…" Parvati began.
"Bring a pillow. You read the book at all and you'll pass," Leanne said.
"And astronomy," Parvati finished.
"It's okay," Leanne said. "Then again, if the weather's clear your class is late at night which can be a pain."
"Why?"
"Can't very well see the stars from inside, can you?"
Sally-Anne soon found herself in a classroom at a desk that sat two people. She was paired with her roommate Luna Lovegood. In front of her and Luna were Harry Potter and Hermione and in the desk next to them Clarice and Neville Longbottom. Lavender and Parvati were seated in the desk next to her. The other three Gryffindor boys were behind them. They were on one side of the classroom while on the other were the students from Huffelpuff. On the desk where she assumed a teacher would sit there was a tabby cat that seemed to be looking over everyone in the room.
"That's Professor McGonagall," Luna whispered.
"We're taking lessons from a cat?" Sally-Anne asked back.
"She's not really a cat. It's a kind of magic based upon Transfiguration. It's called an Animagus."
"She can turn into any animal?"
"Oh no. Each person can only have one Common Form. I guess you could use a spell and become anything, but you could only become an animal about the same size and mass that you already are and even then not for long. Animagus, however, is not related to the person's size and you can remain like that for ages if you want."
"Cool."
The clock on the wall struck nine and the cat transformed into a tall, older witch with square rimmed glasses and a serious expression.
"Welcome to Hogwarts and Transfiguration," she said. "I am Professor McGonagall and as you may recall from last night's feast I am the Deputy Headmistress. For those Gryffindors who have not figured it out yet, I am also Head of your House.
"Transfiguration is one of the most difficult, complex and potentially dangerous forms of spell casting you will learn here. Consequently, I expect you to pay attention and not to horse around in class. Any such shenanigans could well earn you an invitation to continue your magical education somewhere else. This will be your first and only warning.
"Now, can anyone tell me what you just witnessed?"
Sally-Anne was one of several students who raised her hand. Had she noticed, she would have seen that McGonagall was looking for students who were true First Years. McGonagall called on her. "Yes Miss?"
"Perks, Professor, Sally-Anne Perks. You're an animagus."
"And what is that?"
"As I understand it, it's a form of transfiguration. You can turn into that cat at will, but only that cat. There might be other spells that could allow you to turn into something else, but it would have to be something about your – er – weight and would not last as long."
"Very good. Five points to Gryffindor. You're new to magic, yes?"
Sally-Anne nodded. "Luna told me that earlier."
"And you obviously paid attention. Now, for today's lesson…"
The lesson was fairly tame when compared to seeing an animagus transformation for the first time. The students were asked to transfigure a match stick into a needle. It seemed easy enough, but Sally-Anne had remembered how hard it was to change a feather into something else from the night before, and in that case she was not asked to change it into anything in particular, just something different. Luna talked her through the process and told her that visualization, focus and willing the change were keys. For ten minutes she waived her new wand and uttered the incantation as McGonagall had told them with no effect. Luna, however, seemed unconcerned and helped her relax.
Suddenly, after what seemed like her hundredth try, she looked down and saw a perfect needle before her. "Professor?" she asked.
McGonagall walked over and looked at the needle. She then looked at Luna.
"Just told her to relax and focus," Luna said.
"Excellent work then, Miss Perks. Another five points to Gryffindor."
Luna then transfigured her match stick into a needle. Sally-Anne noted that it seemed as if McGonagall winked at Luna before heading off to look over the other students.
Their last class of the day was right after lunch and once it was over, Sally-Anne, Parvati and Lavender followed Luna to another part of the castle. They passed through a doorway that was normally hidden by a painting of two wizards playing chess and into what looked like an expanded version of the common room, except that while their common room was all decorated in scarlet and gold, this one had hangings representing all four houses and a lot of decorations that looked very oriental. Luna told them this was part of the Club Corridor, which was where the Club held whatever it held at school. She admitted she really did not know much more than that being that she was here for only the second time and had never attended Hogwarts before.
Sally-Anne looked around and saw a lot of students were about. Some were reading, others talking and still others engaged in some kind of game or another. A red haired first year from her house, who she remembered was named Ron Weasley, was playing chess with a first year girl from Slytherin whose name escaped her. That fact alone told how different the Club was from the rest of the School. The four kids who had picked on her on the train were Slytherins and she gathered they were not the Club types. It was clear what they thought about Gryffindors from Defense Class, and what the Gryffindors thought of them and no one could say they were nice thoughts.
"Hello," a girl said and Sally-Anne saw a blonde haired Slytherin standing before her. "I'm Daphne Greengrass. Don't let this fool you," she said pointing to the Slytherin crest on her robes, "we're not all useless gits like Malfoy and his lot. Club first, school second, and here our Houses don't matter. So, how was your first day?"
"Sally-Anne Perks," she replied. "It was – er – different. I liked Transfiguration and Charms. Defense not so much."
"Almost reminded me of my first day in Japan," Daphne said. "Right from the start, they're talking in Japanese. Helped us learn the language real fast, but it was a bit disorienting at first. Quirrell might as well be talking in a foreign language. I don't think I understood a word he said."
Sally-Anne nodded. True, she had hardly done a study of English proficiency in the British Schools, but she had never heard a teacher with such an incomprehensible speech impediment. "Glad I'm not the only one."
"Arguably, the worst one yet," an older girl said. The "VII" on her left collar identified her as a Seventh Year. "Last year wasn't so bad, but this one's useless. We'll probably be offering a separate course here in the Club so you new members won't lose out."
"Thanks."
"I never thought I'd see a professor who makes Snape look good. As nasty as he is, you can understand him."
"You already had Defense?" another voice asked. It was Harry with Hermione right by his side.
"Second Period," the girl said. "I'm Dora Tonks, by the way," she added for Sally-Anne, "and the supposed leader of this motley crew."
"I thought we were," Harry said. He seemed to be joking.
"You lead us all, Cousin. You got six schools to worry about. I only have one."
"Thanks a lot," Harry said in false disappointment.
"He, Hermione and Clarice started all of this," Tonks said turning to Sally-Anne. "And once I find our other new members, I'll tell you all about it."
THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 5th, 1991 – HOGWARTS SCHOOL OF WITCHCRAFT AND WIZARDRY, SCOTLAND, U.K.
Potions was one of Harry's favorite courses in Japan. He was naturally a little upset to learn it was one of the most hated at Hogwarts. No one, aside from Snakes like Malfoy liked the teacher and he apparently didn't like students. Still, Harry wondered, it can't be that bad. He sat next to Hermione a couple rows from the front of the classroom which was located in the dungeons meaning if it were not for the candles, the room would be dark as a cave. It seemed oppressive.
This was their first Potions Class. Neville and Clarice were in the same row as Harry, which he thought might make things interesting. He and Neville were Potions Masters and Clarice knew more than a little as she was a Healer. Hermione had done extremely well on her N.E.W.T.s, and in the Potions portion of her Defense Mastery, but had not gone on for additional training, focusing on other specialties.
Harry was slightly pleased to see that the Snakes, the Slytherins who were not and would never be in the Club (unless they had a life changing experience and a personality transplant) were all in the back row by themselves. The only good news was they had not caused any trouble since the train as far as Harry knew. But he did know their type. They were too dumb to remain innocuous forever.
The slamming of a door made him and just about everyone else jump. A man entered. He was all dressed in black with black robes that seemed to flap in the air from his movements.
"Johnny Cash called," Harry whispered, "he wants his wardrobe back."
Hermione did her best, but could not help but snicker. Neville and Clarice did not even bother to try.
"There will be no silly wand waiving or incantations in this class," the man began with a voice that sounded condescending. "As such, many of you may feel there is little need for this and will thus be unable to appreciate the precise science and subtle art that is potions making or the sublime beauty of a simmering cauldron. But for those few … with the proper disposition … I can teach you to brew fame, bottle glory, even put a stopper in death."
"Rather melodramatic," Harry whispered.
"Hush," Hermione whispered back.
"Then again," the man continued, a little louder and clearly glaring at Harry, "perhaps there are some of us who feel they are so omniscient they do not need to pay attention. Ah! Mr. Potter! Our new celebrity!" the man sneered.
Harry could hear the Snakes snickering behind him. As amusing as this was, he really had not wanted the man's attention at all. This was just creepy.
"Mr. Potter. What would you make if I asked you to combine powdered root of asphodel with an infusion of wormwood?"
"If that was all you told me, a mess."
Several students chuckled as Harry went on.
"However, if mixed in the proper proportions, which is two to one and placed in a water base and heated to low boil for thirty minutes until it achieved the consistency of syrup and a light, yellow color, you get a potion called the Draught of the Living Dead which is commonly used by Healers dealing with extremely painful, life threatening injuries as the consumer is placed into a coma and would no longer feel or remember anything until revived."
Snape's pale face almost took on some color. "Where would you look if I asked you to find me a Bezoar?"
"As with your first question, it's not well worded," Harry replied. "Any properly stocked potions lab should have at least one. They are commonly available at the apothecary shops. However, if your are asking what it is and where I could find one without going to Diagon Alley, it is a stone that is found in the stomach of a goat. However, those goats that do produce them typically are rare so it is not advisable to start carving them up as those that do produce them, produce them regularly and they eventually pass through their system. I would say find the right goat and start poking through its dung."
"Ewww!" a couple of girls squealed.
"However, as they are an antidote for most magical poisons, a little mess leads to a large reward," Harry finished.
"Name two poisons it won't cure," Snape hissed.
"Certain magical Venoms are beyond its powers such as basilisk and acromantula. Iocane is another."
"What is the difference between monkshood and wolvesbane?"
"As a plant, none," Harry replied. "The plant is known as aconite. However, the terms refer to different preparation of the leaves. Monkshood is dried out and reduced to a powder and wolvesbane is pickled. As active potions ingredients they have very different properties and are not interchangeable. Untreated Aconite is actually a third ingredient."
Harry knew the three questions were beyond what was in the text for first year. What a Bezoar did was standard potions safety and was the only part of any of the questions he might have faced first term in Japan. The rest of the question, however, was O.W.L. level. The others had also been beyond what any of these First Years should expect to see on exams, but it was clear Snape was trying to humiliate him.
The questions kept coming and kept getting more advanced and Harry kept answering them. He knew it was stupid as they were now well into N.E.W.T. levels and his original excuse if called out would have been he read ahead over the summer and had a photographic memory (which was not true, but as a skilled occlumens that would not matter). Obviously, that excuse had just gone from plausible to impossible.
For over two hours, Snape grilled him with ever more difficult questions and he kept answering, if not to Snape's satisfaction, at least in a way where Snape would not say he was wrong. He was now into Master's Level questions and the grilling did remind him of his Master's Level oral examinations. He knew he was being stupid and stubborn and should have faltered long ago just to end this and keep his true education secret, but something about the man in front of him had his back up. He could sense both Hermione and Neville trying to hint he should back down, but he could not. The man had called him out and it was clear Snape expected Harry to be full of himself because of that Boy-Who-Lived rubbish. Harry had never given that persona a thought. His confidence was because of what he had done in the last few years, not because of some event in the distant past he neither remembered nor acknowledged. And he was not about to let anyone think he cared about or rested upon that other Harry Potter.
At the two hour mark, Snape suddenly stopped with a surprised look upon his face. Maybe he finally realized how advanced the questions were, Harry thought. That's one spiteful man if it took him that long to figure that out. Not that it does me any good.
The man's eyes narrowed. "Twenty points from Gryffindor for your insufferable cheek. Private potions lessons I assume?"
Harry shrugged.
"There seems to be far more to you than meets the eye, Mr. Potter."
Great, Harry thought.
"Today's lesson was to make a potion that can cure boils," Snape said. "The reason is that it is a useful potion to have as the ailment is a frequent occurrence in this class, although not by design. I hope you all understand the potential consequences of what can happen in this class if you do not follow directions precisely. The directions are on the board and ingredients in the cupboards. It normally takes over an hour to brew properly and since Mr. Potter has monopolized our time, you can all blame him for the zeros you receive when you fail to complete the task. But rest assured I shall deduct five points from Mr. Potter for each such zero."
Harry looked at the board. "That's not right," he whispered to Hermione and loud enough for Neville to hear.
"Don't you think you're in enough trouble?" Hermione asked.
"That formula is not right," Neville agreed. "Pretty much guarantees a zero."
"Hermione, get our ingredients, I'll write out corrections our 'friends' can use."
"I don't believe this!" Hermione said as she got up and headed for the cupboard.
Harry, meanwhile, was writing.
"Skip Steps 5 and 6 altogether and bin those ingredients.
Add 3 additional ounces in Step 7.
When it boils, IMMEDIATELY remove cauldron from heat and stir vigorously (direction does not matter) until mixture turns deep tan, then stop and it's done.
HP"
He passed the note to Neville who nodded in agreement then waived his hand making copies. Neville passed them out to the other Club members who looked at Harry and then got to work. Fortunately, the "Snakes" were too busy setting up and making derogatory comments to notice.
Just before the class ended, Snape returned to the room and from the expression on his face expected a disaster that had not come to pass. Fifteen of the twenty-one students had somehow already finished their potions and Snape went up to one of the Slytherins, Tracy Davis, and checked it. The surprise was evident on his face. As he looked into the other cauldrons, he grudgingly handed out "Acceptables" to Harry and fifteen others. When he reached the Snakes in the back row, however, it was six zeros because none of them had finished.
"Do you mind explaining this minor miracle, Potter?" he sneered.
"I note that the formula on the board is the same one in our book," Harry said carefully. For some reason Harry was pleased that the author was not Severus Snape. "The author either has a sick sense of humor or needs to write fiction for a living. The ingredients in steps five and six are not only unnecessary and have no magical effect on the desired product, they also make it much harder to brew. The first one practically triples the brewing time for no magical gain in either: effect, quality or potency. The second one is similarly useless, unless you like exploding cauldrons. Leaving the proper brew on after it begins to boil, in addition to increasing the brewing time yet again, actually dilutes the effect, meaning you need more of the potion to do what you want."
"Are you suggesting you might know more than the author who, I must add, is a highly respected Potions Master?"
"In regards to this potion, it should be obvious."
"I see," Snape sneered. "Thirty points, Mr. Potter. Or did you think I was joking when I said five points for every zero?"
"No Sir," Harry said.
"And I think a detention will do too. I know how this Club you seem to belong to likes its Saturdays off. For your detention, you will teach a three hour Potions Class to all First Years this Saturday. No exceptions will be granted!"
"Yes sir," Harry said as meekly as he could. "Any particular topic?"
"It will be your class, Mr. Potter. So long as it's relevant to potions and the class brews something, it will be your call. And I will be there," he announced in a louder voice just in case people were not listening. "While I doubt Mr. Potter is capable, I do expect the rest of you to take it as seriously as any other class. If you fail to perform because you can't or won't try, I will place the necessary mark in your report and deduct house points."
While no one liked this, it was clear the Snakes liked it the least.
"Oh," Snape added. "Crabbe, Goyle, Malfoy, Zabini, Miss Runcorn and Miss Parkinson, five points off from each of you for not being cunning enough to get the proper potions formula when everyone else seemed to be using it. Class dismissed!" With that Snape turned and stormed out of the dungeon.
Hermione was glaring at Harry, who could only hang his head.
"Hey Professor," a voice called. Harry at first thought it might be Malfoy, but he had apparently already left with the other Snakes. It was Ron with Millie Bulstrode by his side. "That was bloody brilliant," Ron said.
"Shutting Snape up," Millie said. "You'll be a Hogwarts legend by nightfall. And thanks for the tips."
"You're welcome," Harry said cautiously, waiting for Hermione to scold him into next year.
"Not sure I could have kept my head," Ron said. "I'd have done something stupid."
"Like what?" Hermione asked in a hiss, "announced to the whole school that Harry's really a Potions Master in disguise? Blow the Club secret wide open?"
"Erm, no not that," Ron said. "Something dumber probably."
"Well, what Harry did wasn't brilliant," Hermione said.
"Depends on your point of view," Ron replied, "but I guess."
"To be honest," Neville said, "I might have done something similar if it was me."
"You wouldn't!"
"He was goading him, Hermione," Neville said. "Would you have played dumb if someone questioned your ability or knowledge of Transfiguration?"
Hermione could not answer, for the answer was obvious.
"We knew coming here was a risk," Neville said. "But it is also necessary and with a thousand of us who can shift to Japan without a problem, it's not like the Ministry can stop us now if they wanted to."
"But what about the others," Hermione began.
"There are already close to two thousand adults who are behind this Club, including two Senior Ministry Department Heads and some powerful members of the Wizengamot. Politically, it would not be a good day for the Ministry were they to try and take action. True, we should try and keep this quiet longer, for when there are three thousand of us we'd be even harder to stop, but even as it is, the momentum is with us."
"Anyway," Ron said, "it's only twenty points. Sally-Anne seems to get that many a day."
Sally-Anne smile at this. It was not absolutely true, but aside from Potions and History, she had gotten at least ten points in each class thus far.
"It was fifty points," Hermione said.
"Oh, I don't count the other thirty as the Snakes lost the same amount," Ron replied. He then turned to Millie: "No offense."
"None taken," Millie said with a smile. "We all know you tend to stick your foot in it now and then. Besides, it was Malfoy and his lot for the most part and they are not going to enjoy the Common Room tonight when the older students found out that Snape took points from them. They might want to find an abandoned classroom to hide in. Although I do feel sorry for Zabini in a way."
"Oh?" a few voices asked.
"He's not from Britain. He's only 'with' Malfoy 'cause he's not in the Club. And even then, he prefers staying as clear of that lot as possible."
"Possible Club member?" Harry asked.
Millie shrugged. "The older ones are checking him out. But it's clear he does not like being mentioned in the same sentence as Malfoy."
"Oh I don't know if that's such a bad thing," Ron said. "While usually I'd agree with that; 'Ron Weasley kicked Draco Malfoy's arse' is a sentence I could tolerate with me and him in it."
Millie laughed.
As Harry and Hermione left the classroom, she whispered: "Just 'cause no one else seems upset doesn't mean I'm not mad at you."
"I'm sorry."
"I mean, I can understand Neville's point and really don't know what I would have done if it was one of my areas. I'd like to think I'd play dumb, but … You may want to swallow that pride, at least in front of Snape."
"I'll try," Harry said. "To be honest, I wasn't expecting that."
"That is a point we can agree on. He really doesn't like you, does he?"
What Harry had not known until that afternoon was that McGonagall had an office in the Club Corridor. It was located on the Sixth Floor with the classrooms that the Club used for tutoring and study sessions. Then again, she was the faculty advisor and it made sense to have an office here when Club issues needed to be discussed. Still, Harry was not pleased about this one at all.
"Come in," a voice called after he knocked. "Have a seat, Harry," she added. There was a hint of disappointment in her voice which was probably even more painful than if she had gone off on a rant. Harry took his seat.
"A rather interesting Potions Lesson this morning, I've heard," she began. "Quite unusual."
"I'm sorry," Harry said.
"Nonsense," McGonagall replied. "I will admit it was not the best use of your intellect, but I was told he was asking for it in a way. Still, you do realize the potential problem?"
Harry nodded.
"As a precaution, we've sent a message out to the other schools alerting them of a possible security breach so they can take what they deem as appropriate precautions. That, I might add, is a first for the Club. Then again, one might argue that the fact that we've managed to avoid the Bludger this long, given the numbers we are dealing with, is a significant accomplishment. That does not excuse what happened."
"No Ma'am," Harry said.
"The good news is that while Professor Snape explained your first Potions lesson in excruciating detail, for some reason he has failed to connect your – and I quote – highly suspect level of knowledge in Potions with the Club."
"Oh?"
"He does think you are a member," McGonagall said, "and is sure a few of your classmates are as well. I think the hardware on your collars gives that away. But he only brought up the Club as he felt that ruining your Saturday was a particularly harsh punishment, especially since he decided all the rest of your year should share in your misery and miss out on whatever it is the Club gets on with while away from school."
"I will admit I am not thrilled with spending my Saturday with him and even less thrilled my friends have to share in my misery, Harry replied.
"Keep that in mind for the future, Harry."
"So if he does not connect the Club to what happened in Class, what is his thinking about it?"
"He does connect some of what happened to the Club," McGonagall said. "He noted that all the kids with 'things' on their collars made acceptable potions while those who did not failed. He's pretty sure the 'things' on the collars and the Club are connected and is also sure that you somehow helped the others. He regretted not saying you could not help the others for he says he missed that opportunity to dock you even more points.
"That being said, he does think you had outside help. It is the only way to explain how a First Year could answer questions that are even beyond N.E.W.T. levels."
"Please don't say he suspects a school," Harry said. "One of the purposes of the Club is to hide the fact that a thousand or more of us are getting our educations overseas."
"No, he does not suspect a school," McGonagall replied.
"Well, if not the Club or another school, what then?"
"Sirius Black," McGonagall said.
"What? That's ridiculous!"
"Are you suggesting that Sirius is incapable of teaching you potions?"
"No. It's not that at all. He just wouldn't. The idea is crazy!"
"When it comes to Sirius Black and your father, Professor Snape's view of them tends to be somewhat irrational, but there is logic to his conclusion, Harry."
"Oh? You mean aside from irrational and mental?"
"One which might help diffuse this situation for now," McGonagall nodded.
"Okay? What possible reason – what logically possible reason is there for anyone to believe that Sirius trained me up to post-N.E.W.T. levels in potions?"
"Like most of the rest of our world, Harry, you disappeared from mind and memory for Professor Snape a little over three years ago when the Blood Wards Dumbledore cast upon you reached full strength when you and Clarice were reunited as a family. Now, as you may know, that effect is not unlike a memory charm and like a memory charm, a person tends to write over the empty space with inferences gleaned from unaffected memories. In many cases, this creates a false memory that to his mind covers over the gap, which is easier to accept than the gap itself.
"So, you cease to exist three years ago and then reappear sometime in the last few months, figuratively speaking and as far as Professor Snape is concerned. Moreover, while he may have 'forgotten' about you for a time, your wards did not cover what happened with Sirius. Snape knows Sirius was exonerated and released from Azkaban and also now knows that Sirius's release coincides with the approximate time you 'disappeared,' which is how he now remembers forgetting all about you for a time.
"As you know, Sirius has not been a fixture on the magical social scene. His employment with MI-5 is known only to a few of us. His marriage to Sophie and the birth of his daughter Emily never made the society pages of the Daily Prophet. For all practical purposes, and as far as Professor Snape is concerned, Sirius too disappeared not long after he was released from prison. Conclusion?"
"Sirius was raising me," Harry said. "It's not far from the truth…"
"Wouldn't let Bob and Rose Granger know that," McGonagall said with a smirk.
"Said it was not far from the truth," Harry said. "He has been living with us the whole time and I see him as much as the Grangers. He and Sophie did spend my second summer in Japan as Student Minders at the school. So, while inaccurate, that conclusion isn't totally mental. Still, it's a long way from that to today's Potions lesson."
"You can concede that a seven year old can be taught potions?" McGonagall asked.
"Of course," Harry replied. "I began potions at age seven."
"How many hours a week when you started?"
"I think it was three," Harry said.
"Which is the same you get here through O.W.L.s. Now, what might have happened if that were the only thing you were being taught over the last three years? Let's say, for example, instead of three hours a week and other course work as well, it was all you did? How far do you think you could have gotten in Potions in three years?"
"It's possible," Harry nodded. "Maybe not a Mastery … definitely not as Sirius is not a Potions Master, but he did go beyond N.E.W.T.s in Potions as an Auror, just as we all did in Japan in our Defense Mastery. And," Harry paused. "And the post N.E.W.T. level questions were the kinds of questions a person who studied Potions for Auror or Defense would have been at least familiar with! But why would he even think that – I mean aside from the fact that I answered the questions? It doesn't really make sense."
"Professor Snape seems convinced that Sirius trained you up in Potions over the last three years specifically to embarrass him in class," McGonagall said.
"Okay, now that is mental. True, Potions is the one magic here in Britain that all witches and wizards learn and which can be taught before age eleven as it does not require a wand and cannot run afoul on the wand restrictions. But that seems like a lot of effort just for a prank."
"If you knew the history between your father, Sirius and Professor Snape, it might not seem so unbelievable. Your father and Sirius were in the same year in school as Professor Snape. Professor Snape was a Slytherin and your father and Sirius were Gryffindors, which would have been acrimonious in any event, but their ill will went far beyond the traditional intra-house hostility, even during those times. They started Hogwarts the fall after You-Know-Who and the Death Eaters became known publically, which only increased the intra-house tensions. Still, the feud between the Marauders and Professor Snape went above and beyond the Gryffindor, Slytherin thing of that day. It was only by a miracle – and perhaps due in no small part to your mother – that their fights did not result in serious injury. It seems your mother was the only person both sides would listen to and the only one who could get either to back down. Given some of the things that happened, and the lengths Sirius went to get at Professor Snape, it's not that large of a leap to believe Sirius trained you in Potions to use you to humiliate him, at least if you view this from his perspective."
"Seems it would take an exceedingly petty and callous person to think like that," Harry said after some thought.
"As smart as Professor Snape is," McGonagall said, "and he is very intelligent, when it comes to Sirius, petty and callous are what he is and what he assumes Sirius is."
"Which means Professor Snape assumes my knowledge is limited to Potions and what Sirius could have taught me," Harry nodded. "As long as I don't prove him otherwise, he might do nothing?"
"As long as he thinks I am not standing in his way," McGonagall said. "He's not about to go to Dumbledore about a Sirius Black prank, especially if he can torment you in retaliation. If he thinks I am protecting you, he might well bring this to Dumbledore. Otherwise, he'll settle for baiting you in class, docking you points and giving you detentions when he can. I'm sorry."
"Great. So what do you suggest?"
"You mean aside from not costing our House fifty points per Potions lesson and effectively getting the entire First Year in detention every weekend? I am not sure Miss Perks can earn that many points a week every week."
"Sorry."
"What would you suggest you do in this situation?" McGonagall asked.
"He really as an irrational thing about Sirius?"
McGonagall nodded.
"That's a huge blind spot," Harry said thinking. "In a duel or a martial arts match, knowing that I'd exploit it as best I could. Sun Tzu would suggest I should let the enemy see what he wants to believe and not the true nature of things. So, that means I am the Potions product of my godfather's twisted sense of humor, but otherwise am as magically clueless as any other first year."
"That sounds like an idea," McGonagall said.
"Anyone ever tell you you're lucky?" Hermione huffed after hearing Harry's description of his meeting with McGonagall.
Harry shrugged. "I never got stuck in detention in Japan," he said.
"I meant that Snape has such tunnel vision," she replied.
"Not something I would have counted on either," Harry nodded, "but I'm not going to ignore it either."
"Just don't give him more reasons to keep us here," Hermione said.
"That is not my plan."
SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 7th, 1991 – HOGWARTS SCHOOL OF WITCHCRAFT AND WIZARDRY, SCOTLAND, U.K.
One of the problems Harry knew he might have in letting Snape see what he wanted to see was that unlike most eleven year olds, Harry had taught classes before. It was something he had done when working on his Masteries and had, in fact, taught N.E.W.T. level Potions during his third summer in Japan when he was working towards his Potions Mastery. Luna, Neville and Susan had been his students then. He had also taught potions tutorials at the Club on weekends and most all the Club members had been there for at least some lessons. He had already decided he was not going to fake this lesson and hoped that Snape would not notice and just assume he was lucky.
It was shortly after lunch and the Great Hall had been transformed into a Potions classroom of sorts. There were twenty tables that would seat two students each, which were already set up with cauldrons and the ingredients for the day's lesson. A large screen was behind Harry as he was going to use a projection charm he had learned in Japan, hoping Snape would not catch on. He watched patiently as the First Years filtered in, filling the rows of tables. He noted that the seven First Years who had most recently joined the Club were up front along with, to his surprise, Blaise Zabini who was seated with Theo Nott. The remaining First Years were interspersed with the exception of four of the five know as the Snake Pit, who had chosen seats in the back. Pansy Parkinson was seated elsewhere. He also noted that a few upper years were present too, probably out of curiosity as this was one of the more original detentions on record. Harry waited as Snape told the First Years that he expected them to treat this as a regular class and if Mr. Potter was as abysmal a teacher as Snape believed, he would not hold their performance against them but in the unlikely event he actually had something useful to teach, treating this as something other than a graded evolution would have consequences.
"Good afternoon everyone," Harry began, "and welcome to my detention."
It seemed most of the class laughed, although there were a few grumbles.
"For those of you who were not present when I was convicted – and as a refresher for those of you who were – I was told to teach a three hour lesson and I could teach whatever I wanted 'so long as it's relevant to potions and the class brews something.' Well, I suppose we could talk about potions for a bit and then brew a cup of tea, but that's being cheeky and if we have to be here for three hours, we might as well learn something.
"What I will present is an introduction to Potions. Now I would prefer a few classes on lab safety and ingredient preparation before actually asking you to brew away, but since brewing something is required, so much for that idea. We are going to make a potion and while doing so we will discuss the various categories of potions ingredients, the basics of how they interact and why they are important, and how they can go together.
"Now, while Professor Snape has his intro to this field of magical study, I have my own as well. I have lived most of my life in the non-magical world and have had a non-magical education until now. My favorite class in the non-magical world is Chemistry and one of the things I like t do at home is cook. There are elements to both in Potions and I dare say it is not nearly as huge a leap of intellect from that world to this as Spell casting."
"I would beg to differ, Mr. Potter," Snape replied. "Potions is perhaps the most exacting of magical studies."
"I am not going to disagree with that statement. It is a field that calls for patience, a steady hand, precision and far more attention to detail than others," Harry continued. "However, while the ability to invent and improve potions requires both magical intuition and a solid grounding in magical theories, making potions is not something that requires any inordinate degree of inherent magical ability."
"Are you suggesting a Muggle could make a Potion?" Snape asked. "It is common knowledge that they cannot."
"And this is based upon a detailed study, or an unsubstantiated superstition predicated upon a general belief? Are you not aware that many apothecaries and Potions Makers employ Squibs to make their potions?"
"Squibs are different," Snape began.
"How so? They lack the ability to express magic. In that regard they are the same as Muggles. The only difference there for is they had at least one magical parent and were raised with knowledge of magic. Has there been any scientific, peer reviewed study that clearly demonstrates a difference between a Squib and a Muggle that would allow for the explanation that a Squib can make a potion following a set of instructions and a Muggle cannot? To your knowledge, has anyone even tried to determine whether a Muggle can make a viable potion?"
Snape was silent.
"It is not prudent to assume things as fact where it is possible to prove or disprove such assumptions," Harry said. "That being said, it is prudent absent undeniable proof that something is impossible to assume that while it may be improbable, it is still within the realm of possibility.
"What we are going to make is a Potion that some call the Healer's Best Friend. Anyone know what that is?"
There were several guesses before someone said "Blood Replenishing Potion."
"Correct." Harry said. Too his surprise, the someone who was from Huffelpuff earned five points from Snape.
"Now, as I am sure Professor Snape will tell you, this is a N.E.W.T. level potion and thus you probably won't need to make it for exams anytime soon. However, it is a forgiving potion and uses at least one of every category of ingredient we shall discuss. Now, first off, you all have a beaker in front of you. Can anyone tell me what it contains?"
"Essence of Murlap," a voice said.
"Indeed it is, very good. But I was looking for the general category of ingredient."
After a pause, someone said "a liquid."
"It is indeed, but the technical term?"
"A base," another said.
"Correct. Now, if any of you read the first chapter in your books, you may recall that the definition of a potion is: 'a liquid or semi-liquid substance made by combining and placing in solution magical ingredients in combination to create a desired magical effect when applied or ingested.' Obviously, we need liquid to achieve that and we call the predominant liquid the Base. Now, what kind of Bases are there?"
"Water," someone said.
"Correct. Water is known as a universal solvent because under the right conditions most things will dissolve in it. In Potions, the Base Class Water includes – well – water. We can use distilled water, which is water with absolutely nothing in it and salt water or sea water which obviously has various salts. Plant juice also falls in this category. They are obtained by squeezing the water out of plant material, but in this case the water includes sugars and other components from the plant itself. We can also include alcohols, which are made from fermentation of the sugars in a juice including mashes. If we then boil the fermented juice or mash and condense the vapor, we get a strong alcohol distillate. Finally, the juices can be magically tempered. That results in what we call an essence, such as what we will use today and, if we boil that and condense the vapors, we get what is known as a magical extract.
"Okay, another broad category of base?"
"Oils," someone said.
"Correct. Oils can be plant or animal based, but they are both made up of fats. The one thing you should remember about oils for now is that they contain no water.
"Now, while waters and oils can be used as another category of ingredients, they are your primary Bases. There are two other categories of liquids, one of which we will use today. Can anyone name one?"
"Saps?" someone asked.
"Yes, that is one. It comes from plants. Basically, it is whatever oozes from a plant either with or without cutting. It usually is a combination of water, fats, sugars and other stuff. A simple way to remember the plant liquids is you do some squeezing to get the watery juice, a lot of squeezing to get the slippery oil, and just let it ooze for the gooey saps.
"Finally, there are the animal liquids which include blood, bile, venom and other things that are even nastier. We will be using one of those today.
"Now, while saps and animal liquids are occasionally used as a Base, they are far more commonly used as another category of ingredient. Right then, having covered Bases, take your beakers and empty them carefully into your cauldron."
As Harry said this, a picture appeared on the screen which looked down upon Harry's table and anyone who bothered could see him pouring his Essence of Murlap into his cauldron. He then instructed them on how to set a slow heating flame under it to start warming it up and how heat was a way to help things dissolve into solution. He then spent several minutes talking about the use of various Bases in potions as the students caldrons heated.
"Now the next ingredient we will be working with is the one that is closest to your cauldrons," Harry began. It was a bunch of brown leaves that he said was Tinceron. He then showed the class how to crush and cut the leaves in the proper manner and noted most everyone watching the screen behind him. "Once it's fairly pulverized, not quite a dust but not too chunky, measure out one full tablespoon of it and dump it in the cauldron. Then stir until the liquid turns a deep blue. It will take a few minutes.
"This ingredient is called our reactant. Your most basic potions contain a reactant dissolved in a base. The reactant is the primary ingredient that creates the desired magical effect, although in some potions, like this one, it won't do it alone. In fact, this reactant will not properly dissolve on its own so we need to add a co-reactant to make it dissolve properly. Please hold up your hands when and if your solution looks like what is on the screen."
Harry waited and in a few minutes he saw forty hands in the air. He then spent a few minutes talking about the properties of Tinceron and some of the other potions it was used to make. He then continued into the concept of co-reactants in general.
"Right then, on to our co-reactant to help our reactant into solution. You will see some small, white rocks next in line. And yes, it is chalk. Take them and place them in the ceramic bowl which is called a mortar. Then take the ceramic thing that looks like a tiny beaters bat and gently crush the rocks into a powder thusly," and he began to demonstrate. "This bat looking thing is called a pestle.
"Once your chalk is a nice powder, begin stirring again slowly and take a pinch of the powder and sprinkle it slowly into the mixture. Keep slowly adding the powder until the liquid turns green then stop adding and stirring."
He again asked for a show of hands when the class had reached this point. Once he saw forty hands in the air, he continued.
"Right then, our reactant is now in solution. However with some potions, like this one, even when dissolved in solution the reactant will not react properly without a little help. It needs what we call a catalyst. For this potion, it's another ground up mineral powder, the small pile of red stuff that was next to your chalk. The mineral is actually rust or iron oxide and you grind the rust bits the same way you ground the chalk, but I decided to save you that step. Again, while stirring your potion, add the red dust until the potion turns white like milk and then stop."
Harry again asked for a show of hand when the class reached this point.
"Now, in N.E.W.T. Levels, we would probably discuss this next bit in excruciating detail. But as this is a First Year Intro, I'm just going to give you the summary. This potion actually has three different magical reactions that will occur. You won't actually see them, but they will happen and it's the combination of these reactions which will regenerate blood when it's ingested. Whenever you have more than one magical reaction occurring within a potion, there is a risk that one reaction will be stronger than it is supposed to be while another is weaker. The hard way to make sure everything happens as it is supposed to is through exceedingly precise measurements, exceeding pure ingredients and an exceedingly slow brewing process. Sometimes, there is no way around that. But in other cases, like ours today, there is one. It's a category of ingredient called a buffer.
"A buffer basically balances out the magical reactions. Now how it does that depends upon the ingredients and reactions at issue. What it does is effectively slow down or speed up the various reactions so that they occur at the desired rate. What we are going to use is powdered blowfish. This is basically the best bits of the fish that have been dried and powdered and it is best to obtain this from an apothecary rather than try and make it yourself. So, you'll find a tan powder on your tables. Again, as we did before, while stirring slowly add the powder until your potion turns yellow in color."
When forty hands were again in the air, Harry continued. "One thing you absolutely need to know about any potion and any potion ingredient is whether and when it is toxic. We've added a very useful buffer to our potions, but it is blowfish and anyone who knows anything about blowfish knows it can be drop dead deadly stuff. Now, as this potion is supposed to replenish blood to keep someone whose been bleeding alive, poisoning them is not a good idea. So we need to counteract the toxins we've just added so that we won't make things worse for the eventual patient. And if any of you have any smart ideas about a prank, first of all your potions will be tested. Second of all, any that appear to pass will be used to stock our supplies in the Hospital Wing and the victim of your prank may be you.
"Our detoxifier is our next to last ingredient and it is a sap. You will find a plant pod…"
"But there's nothing after it," someone pointed out.
"We'll get to that omission in a bit," Harry said. "The detoxifier basically counter acts the toxins in the potion and makes it safe to use. Take the Tar Pod – that's what it's called – and squeeze it gently as you stir. A black goo will drip out slowly. Keep dripping and stirring until the potion turns white again, then stop dripping, but keep stirring until it returns to its former yellow color. Don't worry if you get an extra drop or two. As long as it turns white then yellow, you're good."
When everybody seemed to indicate they had reached this point, Harry continued.
"Okay, as was pointed out, we seem to be short an ingredient. What we are missing is the activator. This is the final thing and will make this Blood Replenishing Potion replenish blood. For many, if not most of you, this is also the hardest step and not due to any technical stuff. You will find on your table a small metal lance. Our activator is five drops of our blood."
Harry was not surprised that there were some gasps and protests. But, after several minutes most everyone had lanced their fingers and added the final ingredient and the others were allowed help either with the lancing or by using someone else's blood.
"Now comes the boring part," Harry said. "We slowly stir our caldrons until the potion turns its final color, a deep blood red. This will take a few minutes so don't get too upset. When your potion becomes blood red, blow out the flame and raise your hand so Professor Snape knows you are ready to have it tested."
A little over ten minutes later, Harry's potion was the first to turn red and he blew out his flame. Snape came over and waived his wand over the cauldron. "Acceptable," he drawled in a manner that might suggest he was thoroughly unimpressed. One by one, other students raised their hands and Snape preformed the same spell. One by one, it seemed, he continued to say "acceptable." Soon, only Malfoy, Crabbe, Goyle and Runcorn were left.
"Ten points each from Slytherin," Snape said in a voice that for him was almost shouting. "Did I not tell you to treat this as a graded evolution?"
"You were serious?" Malfoy asked. "But this is Potter's detention!"
"I was serious, Mr. Malfoy, in the off chance he actually taught something. I have thirty-seven caldrons of Blood Replenishing Potion that suggests he got luck and four malcontents who did not bother to learn even what little he had to offer! Perhaps I should reconsider the detentions?"
"When my father," Malfoy began.
"Twenty additional points, you insufferable dunderhead and I can assure you your father will hear of this. You should expect a Howler from him in the next post advising you in no uncertain terms that when your Head of House tells you to do something, you do it. Now get out of my sight!"
Malfoy and the other three practically ran from the Great Hall.
"Mr. Potter," Snape said. "While I still suspect a Black influence, these potions are adequate. Please make sure the glass bottles them properly and see to it they are delivered to Madam Pomphrey. Then see to it this mess is cleared off."
"Yes Professor," Harry replied.
With that Snape turned and left the Hall.
"That was bloody brilliant," Ron Weasley said.
"Which part?" Millie asked him. "The lesson or the Malfoy bit?"
"Both," Ron replied. "But the Malfoy bit especially."
As the "class" was in the process of bottling their potions, Harry heard a voice from the back comment: "Best bloody potions lesson I've ever seen." He looked up briefly and saw a large group of older students that had apparently gathered to watch the show that was now over.