Invader Zim: Might of the Empire
Chapter 4: Irkpolitik
1. No planet, moon, or other significantly large
object that is either under the control of or
marked for conquest by the Irken Empire or
one of its official allies may be repurposed for fuel
2. The Irken Empire must leave at least 10% of all
significantly large objects in a given sector aside
so that they may be repurposed for fuel.
3. The Planet Jackers get a 25% off discount on any
purchases made on Foodcortia, Cinamia, or through
Callnowia
-The Irken-Planet Jacker Treaty. Signed into law by Almighty Tallest Myuki in Irk Year 108 of the High Era
Almighty Tallest Red watched from the bridge as the replica Vort ship cleared hangar 6's gate and separated itself from the Irken Armada as soon as the fleet had entered Sector 11. As soon as the ship dropped out of the scanner's range, the Armada continued on its course towards the planet of Diplomia. Next to The Massive, Diplomia was arguably the greatest accomplishment of Tallest Myuki's reign as the head of the Irken Empire. Before she had met her untimely demise while touring Research Station Nine, it was said that her presence alone was enough to stop a battle dead in its tracks, and that if rebels were to just hear her voice, they would immediately lay down their arms and return to the factories. The late Tallest's reputation for kindness and the sheer force of charisma she wielded had attracted dozens of nearby species to either join or ally themselves with the empire, and as a result, the empire's boarders had expanded tenfold during Myuki's 125 yearlong rule. As one of her last major decrees, she had ordered a small planet in Sector 5 to be set aside as a neutral world where all of Irk's friends and followers could convene to discuss everything from trade tariffs to border disputes. Thus had the world of Diplomia had been founded, in the hopes that even after Myuki had been replaced by another, the empire would still be able to smoothly negotiate with the universe.
Since Tallest Myuki's death however, the relationship between Irk and its allies had become strained, to say the least. The fact that Myuki had died while touring the Vortian research station was suspicion enough at the time for the Irkens to end one of their longest-lasting alliances. Followed up the day after with the sudden death of Spork, the second-tallest irken in the current generation, the galaxy at large began to lose confidence in the irken leadership. Thankfully, while Tallest Red was no Myuki, he had quickly developed his own method for keeping the allied races in line. While Myuki had used kindness, persuasion, and charm to win over the hearts of others, Red was a master of brutal backroom tactics who pressured others into doing what he wanted through either bribery, blackmail, or threatening to rescind vital treaties. This strategy, while it certainly didn't make the empire very popular with its neighbors, ensured that the allied races' economies were too intertwined with Irk's to allow serious threats to develop against it.
"Sir, we've arrived at planet Diplomia… on time, I would like to add." One of the Navigators on the bridge announced as a beautiful planet with a purple sky and splotches of small, shallow seas dotting the single mega continent that covered 80% of the planet's surface.
"Excellent, have my personal Shuvver ready to launch in five." Tallest Red said as he turned from the monitoring screen and made his way out of the command center.
"Be sure to bring back some donuts!" Purple called out from his place in front of the television.
Almighty Tallest Red's Shuvver descended towards the northern half of the mega continent, landing on a grassy field just outside of a rather enormous complex that had a sort of Greco-Roman feel to it; if such a thing could be accomplished by an alien race. As soon as the ship's landing gear came into effect, the usual dozen of shock-spear wielding honor guard disembarked from the shuttle first. Once the area had been deemed clear of hostiles, the Tallest himself joined his guards on the ground, and the group proceeded towards the designated meeting place. After passing through several marbled passageways and by numerous works of art that Red didn't care for, they arrived in the great debate forum, in which the representatives of the races that had responded to the Tallest's call were already seated. During her time as the Tallest, Myuki had entertained the ideas and proposals of even the smallest of organizations in order to work out the best deal for the empire. Red however had learned that if he only took the time to deal with the major players in Irken controlled spaced, then the minor ones were sure to go along with any policy they came up with if they wanted any benefits for themselves. Sitting around the table now was the minister of foreign affairs for the Blob planet, the chief hauler of the Planet Jackers, the matron of the Crystalines, and the head scientist of the Vortian Loyalists- or as they are referred to most often in their native tongue, the "Mother Sellers". While it was true that Vort was now considered territory occupied by the Irkens and no longer an independent entitiy, the small minority of Vortian scientists who had aided Larb in his conquest of the planet still retained representation in the council of five, though they were only there because Red could always count on them to vote in his favor.
"Welcome, friends of the Irken Empire, and thank you for being able to attend this meeting on such a short notice," Red announced his arrival to the others cordially as he took his designated seat at the table, his guards standing a little ways off behind him. "I'm sure you all have read my proposal, and I would just like to start off by saying-"
"Cut to the chase, Red," The Crystalines' matron spat, her rough cut surface tinged red with irritation.
"Very well then," Red managed to keep his outward demeanor calm as he brought up a holographic list of his troop and ship requests for the whole room to see.
"Ah, quite the significant request," The vortian sitting next to Red said as he skimmed through the various regiments and fleets that had been asked for.
"Kind of a harsh response to a hostage situation, don't you think?" The blob minister said through bites of some sort of snack food.
"Whoa, whoa whoa. Who said anything about this gathering being in response to the incident with Invader Tenn?" Red said as he stood up so he could pace around while he spoke. "Even as we speak, I've prepared an elite team of three-err, four of my best soldiers to rescue Tenn and sabotage Meekorb's ability to communicate with its colonies. What I'm talking about here is the opportunity to add three more solar systems to our area of influence. The Meekorb have always been a selfish, isolationist race who never opted to trade their vast amount of resources with anyone. If we were to remove the Meekorb from the face of the galaxy, then all of their resources would become ours! More planets to settle, more fuel to burn, access for the first time to the Meekorb's unique technology," The tallest placed both hands on the table and leaned inwards towards the others. "You can't tell me your leaders would skip out on a chance like this."
The whole room was rendered silent. Red waited for a minute to let the implications of his words sink in, before pressing a button on the arm rest of his chair and taking a seat.
"I believe that now would be a good time to vote on the issue," Red said with a smug look on his face as another holographic screen replaced the first one. This one showed a tally board separated by a line down the middle. Along the topside were icons representing the five alien species who were voting. Almost immediately, the grinning Irken symbol was moved from the top of the screen and placed inside the green yes bracket, signifying the empire's support of the plan.
"We cannot pass by an opportunity to get a look at Meekorb technology and learn how it works compared to ours," The vortian said as the two crossed horns symbolizing the Vortian Technocracy predictably joined the Irken one in the yes bracket.
"The promise of more fuel is always a welcome one to the Planet Jackers," The image of a planet inside a star joined the first two icons in the yes bracket. "We will burn the Meekorb to ashes in our dying sun."
"Sounds like a good deal to me," The Blob minister added as his species' rather bland icon of a blob head joined the others, leaving only the single gem representing the Crystalines still undecided.
"I… cannot in good conscience let a chance to expand my people's economy go by, not while I can help it."
With that, the final icon disappeared and reappeared inside the green yes bracket.
"Voting is over. Result: Unanimous support." An automated voice announced through nearby loudspeakers.
"Wonderful, I expect to be in contact with your military commanders very soon," Red said as he once again rose from his seat. "We can discuss the division of the spoils in our next meeting, till then, I believe this session is over."
The honor guard quickly formed a tight box around the Tallest as he departed from the forum and returned to his personal shuttle.
"That went better than I expected," Red thought as the Shuvver took off and began its return to The Massive. "As long as my faith in those three plus Tak manage to get Invader Tenn out of the area and shut down the comms without causing too much of a commotion, then Meekorb won't stand a chance! Everything is coming together just perfectly…"