Family of Origin

Something was tickling Jasper's nose.

Grunting and not opening his eyes, Jasper swatted at it, not trying to shake off off the comfort of sleep. His thoughts weren't cognizant as he wiggled his nose, trying to alleviate the persistent itch before it woke him.

The itch chuckled - a lovely, deep chuckle that made Jasper's grin stretch sleepily across his face. Stubborn as all get out, he still refused to open his eyes.

"Baby," Peter sang softly, drawing his finger along the bridge of Jasper's nose, down, over his lips. "You have to wake up. We have a flight to catch."

Jasper groaned. "Don't wanna," he mumbled

"Come on, babe," Peter encouraged, tugging Jasper's hand. "We still have to deal with LAX. Maybe if you're lucky, you can watch some burly security guard stick his hand down my pants."

That made Jasper's eyes fly open. He found Peter hovering over him, propped up on one arm. Putting his hands on the other man's waist, Jasper quickly switched their positions, pressing his lover into the mattress. "Now see, you could have woken me up a lot easier telling me you were looking for someone to stick their hands down your pants."

He kissed Peter soundly then, grinding his hips against the other man's so he groaned against his lips. Peter indulged him for a minute but then put his hands against Jasper's face, holding him still. "Nice try, babe. But we really need to get up."

With a sigh, Jasper rolled off Peter, staring up at the ceiling. "Let's tell them the Cullens adopted us."

Peter got out of bed and stood over his lover with his hands on his hips. "Jasper Whitlock, I know you haven't forgotten your manners," he chastised, his normally soft Southern accent becoming much more prominent. "Now you get out of bed. You're not gonna disappoint your Momma."

Jasper chuckled softly, smiling in spite of himself. "Fine, fine. I'm up," he agreed, rolling out of bed and stretching. He wrapped an arm around Peter's waist, pulling him closer. "You're just so cute when you're bossy," he teased, nipping at the other man's ear.

"Get in the shower," Peter demanded, his voice playful again. "You stink."

Drawing his nose along Peter's shoulder to the skin of his neck, Jasper drew in a deep breath. "So do you," he murmured. Raising his head, he waggled his eyebrows at the other man. "It'll save time if we both shower at the same time."

Peter rolled his eyes but grinned. "Well, that's the first logical thing you've said all day," he agreed, taking Jasper's hand and leading him to the bathroom.

~0~

Jasper was quiet on the plane ride from LAX to George Bush Airport. Perhaps luckily for him, Peter was a nervous flier and was zoned out on Xanax the entire flight.

Because it had been a while since he and Peter had been home, they were going for an extended visit - one week with each set of parents. They would spend the week leading up to the day after Christmas with Jasper's parents and then it was off to Georgia and Peter's parents for the new year.

"Hey, Peter," Jasper said, tugging on the other man's sleeve as they made their way toward baggage claim. Peter looked over, his eyes still a little glassy. "What do you say we keep the maybe-baby to ourselves for now?"

Peter blinked, processing Jasper's words slowly. His eyes narrowed, but before he could say anything, a blond-haired blur flung herself into Jasper's arms with a cry of, "Big brother!"

Jasper wrapped his arms around his sister, lifting her up with the strength of his hug. "Ellie!"

Once Lucy Elizabeth - Ellie to no one else but her brother - disentangled herself from Jasper's arms, she was immediately swept into Peter's. "Hey, Pete. God, it's good to see you guys."

Peter smiled and kissed her cheek before he set her down. "Two years. Time does fly, doesn't it?"

"I know it must be hard to tear yourself away from the glamorous Hollywood lifestyle but would it kill you to come visit more often?" she said, her voice mock stern.

Jasper rolled his eyes. "Ellie, planes go both ways, you know."

"I know," his sister said softly. "Hell, maybe I oughta crash at your place for a while. It would be a welcome break from Mom's sighing. 'Even your brother managed to catch himself a nice fella, what's wrong with you? At this rate I'll never be a grandmother,'" she mimicked.

Peter gave Jasper a pointed look over Lucy's head. "Gee. Wouldn't it be great if you could tell her she'd be a grandmother soon?"

Jasper studiously averted his eyes. Lucy shuddered. "Bite your tongue, Pete. I have no desire to be a mother right now. "

~0~

Jasper had successfully evaded the topic of their impending fatherhood for three days before Peter reached the end of his rope. Jasper could see in his eyes that he was about to jump on a natural segue while they sat in the living room with Maria and Deacon.

Jasper smiled sweetly at his parents. "Please excuse us," he said politely, grabbing Peter by the wrist and hauling him down the hallway. He pushed his lover into the nearest room, shutting the door behind them. Jasper scrambled with his hands along the wall until he found the light.

Laundry room. They were in the laundry room. He sighed.

"What is it about your parents that has you reverting to being a teenage boy?" Peter hissed, not even pretending not to know why Jasper had dragged him away from the table.

It was very cramped in the laundry room. There was barely enough space for an adult to stand and do the laundry let alone for two full grown men to be tucked inside - especially when one of them was gesticulating as much as Peter was.

Jasper was well aware that the topic on the table was important. Impending fatherhood was topmost in his thoughts as of late, and Peter was right to be annoyed at his avoidance of the subject. But while he took the other man's complaints very seriously, it wasn't the first time they'd faced parent issues as a couple.

The simple fact of the matter was that Peter didn't really have a leg to stand on. Jasper's preferred method of dealing with his parents was avoidance. It was a safe bet that if he and Peter were going to visit the Whitlocks, there was going to be at least one fight about the issue. But, in the same vein, when they moved on to the Damon household, Jasper would doubtlessly be the one red faced and whisper-screaming about Netty Damon - Peter's mother - constantly talking about Santiago Salazar - Peter's ex. That Peter feigned sudden deafness rather than come to lover's defense, the spark of irritation lit Jasper's temper.

What both men knew was that they couldn't change their parents, and so they naturally fell into other methods of blowing off steam.

When Jasper unbuttoned his jeans, Peter didn't stop his verbal dressing down. "That's not going to work this time, Jasper," he hissed, though Jasper noticed he did nothing to stop what was happening.

Jasper didn't answer, instead he yanked Peter's boxers down to his knees.

"I ummm... I don't," Peter stumbled, getting distracted as Jasper turned him around, placing his hands firmly on the edge of the dryer. "I think you should grow a pair. Man up and tell your parents we're working on a family. Maybe they'll surprise you by...fuck," he swore under his breath as Jasper dropped to his knees and began kissing a trail across the globes of his lover's ass.

"I mean," Peter panted as Jasper began to circle his entrance with his tongue, "what's the worst that could happen? Oh, sweet Christ... I um. I think they might just be really happy. They're gonna be... oh..." His legs spread, encouraging Jasper's tongue.

Jasper stood, aligning his body with Peter's and kissing his lover's neck. He snaked one hand around Peter's waist, finding his cock and stroking slowly. With his free hand, he reached between them, pushing his pants and boxers down. He aligned himself with Peter's entrance, pushing inside of him slowly as he kissed and nipped at his neck.

"You know," Peter said, his voice breathy, "you're a disrespectful prick. You're scared to tell your parents that you're having a baby with the man you love but you'll have sex with a man against their washing machine and oh, my god, don't stop," he cried quietly, pushing back against Jasper.

"Shhh," Jasper whispered against Peter's ear. "If you can't keep quiet, I'm going to have to stop."

"Fuck. Oh, please, baby, please," Peter whispered back.

Peter reached down, batting Jasper's distracted hand away so he could stroke himself. Jasper kept his hands firmly on his lover's waist, pushing and pulling him to the rhythm he wanted in the limited space they had.

They were relatively quiet - just panting and the light slap of their skin coming together mixed with the occasional low moan. Jasper bit hard against the cloth of Peter's shirt when he came, causing the brunette man to gasp wildly. He came to his senses just in time to catch Peter's orgasm in one of the rag scraps his mother kept above the washing machine.

Peter turned around, winding his arms around Jasper and kissing him softly, any hint of their argument forgotten. Using the rag scraps, they cleaned each other up.

Before either one of them could suggest leaving the sanctuary of the cramped little room, a cell phone chime sounded. They both started a little. The sound was the loudest noise they'd heard in a while.

Peter dug through his pocket, pulling out his phone as he leaned his head against Jasper's . He pressed a few buttons and Jasper watched as first confusion, then incredulity and finally awe lit his face. He turned his phone toward Jasper, showing him the image he'd received from Charlotte.

It was a pregnancy test. A positive pregnancy test.

Jasper snatched the phone from his lover's hand, pressing buttons with shaking fingers. He pressed his forehead against Peter's, putting the phone by both their ears.

"Congrats, Daddy," Charlotte's voice answered.

"It was the first try," Jasper said incredulously. "This stuff never happens on the first try."

Charlotte scoffed. "This is me we're talking about. I swear it's good I prefer women. A man puts his hands on me, I get pregnant. That's exactly how it happened."

"I'm sure that's exactly what happened," Peter teased. "Oh my God, Char… you're pregnant!"

She laughed. "Weare."

"Have you seen the doctor?" Jasper asked, suddenly outrageously anxious.

"I just peed on the stick 10 minutes ago."

"Charlotte. Make an appointment. I'll make one for you. And you can't drink or smoke. And no sushi. And no soda. And…" Jasper scrambled, trying to remember all the 'rules.'

"Jasper, calm your ass," Charlotte said, laughing. "Jesus, I'm glad you're halfway across the country right now. You know I swore off everything I needed to a month ago, and I've been taking the horse pills." Horse pills was Charlotte's name for the prenatal vitamins she absolutely hated.

"How are you feeling?" Peter asked.

"My tits are a little sore but I'm not really feeling anything yet," Charlotte answered patiently. "Now get off this phone. Celebrate. I'm taking care of your precious package, I promise."

The boys shot a couple more questions at her before she was able to convince them to hang up. When they did, there was a moment of silence between them. They stared at each other, the atmosphere undulating between an intense fear and an incredible joy.

"We're having a baby," Jasper whispered.

Peter grinned, then he giggled. It couldn't be described as anything other than a giggle – the sound was so bubbly and full of happiness.

Jasper cupped his face in his hands. "Peter. We're gonna be daddies."

Wrapping his arms around him, Peter pulled Jasper close, kissing him thoroughly, excitedly. They both laughed when they parted and then Jasper let out a loud whoop of joy.

It was too much happiness to be contained to the tiny room they were in, and so Jasper's hand scrambled at the door knob. He pushed the door open, stumbling out of the room only to come face to face with his father. "We're having a baby!" he blurted.

A gasp made Jasper aware that his mother was standing close by. He stood still, his mind still shocked about the idea of being a daddy, and waited for a reaction.

Deacon's eyes narrowed with suspicion. "What were you two doing in there?"

Jasper blinked, his brain not quite grasping the question. It seemed horribly out of place amidst the happiness that had permeated the air just a moment before. "What?" he asked intelligently.

"What were you doing in there with him?" Deacon asked again, jutting his chin at Peter.

Jasper's eyes tightened slightly. "Laundry," he muttered dismissively.

"You didn't bring any clothes with you from the hotel," his father said stiffly.

Annoyance tinged with anger began to stir in the pit of Jasper's stomach. His broad grin fell. "Dad. Didn't you hear what I said? We're having a baby," he said slow, glancing over at Peter. "You're going to be a grandfather."

"There's nothing wrong with my hearing, boy. I'm not gonna pretend I understand what the devil you're talking about because last I heard, men can't birth children. I'll acknowledge what you say when you start making sense," Deacon retorted stiffly. "You're adopting a baby, then?"

By then Jasper's grin had disappeared completely, becoming a hard line, as he tried to keep his temper bottled back. He didn't realize his fists were clenched until he felt Peter's hand over his, trying to unwind his fingers. Jasper made an effort to unclench that hand enough to twine his fingers with Peter's. "We're not adopting. We're having a baby. You know, the kind that take nine months to bake."

Deacon studied his son, obviously at a loss as to what he was talking about. "What, did you get another gal pregnant? You're actually going to take responsibility this time. Is that what this is about?"

Rage made it difficult for Jasper to remember that the man standing before him was his father. He took a step toward Deacon before Peter's hand gripped his wrist. "Babe," Peter said, leaning on the word, knowing he was making Deacon uncomfortable. "I need some air. Come with me outside?"

Jasper nodded curtly and let Peter guide him to the backyard. As the bite of cold air nipped at his skin, he felt his rationality return. He breathed in deeply. "I'm sorry," he said to Peter, resenting that his father had ruined such a beautiful moment.

"Same old shit, different day," his lover responded with a sigh. Though it took some effort, he smiled again. "I'm not going to let him ruin this for us. Today is a happy day."

Finding the gleam in Peter's eye, Jasper couldn't help but smile back. "Yeah, it is," he agreed, and the couple shared a slow, passionate kiss, just letting themselves reclaim their earlier joy.

They were interrupted by the sound of a door slamming - the front door if Jasper had to guess - followed by an engine being gunned. Curious, the men darted back inside. They found Maria in the kitchen... alone.

"Where's Dad?" Jasper asked carefully.

Maria looked up at him and smiled. Jasper could see it wasn't a complete smile, but it wasn't totally faked either, and that was something. "I told him to take a drive to clear his head." She patted Jasper lovingly on the cheek. " He'll come around, sweetheart. You know he's trying to understand."

"He's been trying for near about a damn decade now," Jasper growled, frustration edging his voice. "I'm so tired of this fight."

Nodding, Maria gestured at the table. Obediently, Jasper and Peter sat down and let her pour them tea. "Well," Maria began, her tone easy, "maybe you can try to understand him too, if you want him to try and understand you."

Jasper and Peter glanced at each other. Reaching over, the blond man clasped his lover's hand on top of the table. "You want me to understand that he thinks I should just be able to turn off who I am and love who he thinks I should love? I'm sorry, Momma. I can't understand that. I can listen to any ignorant asshole talk about me being unnatural and unholy and who knows what else, but he's my father. I know he loves me. I know he's trying. I just don't see how he can be so damn rude about it, and why it's so hard to accept after all this time. I love men. This man in particular, and now we're going to have a family. This should be a happy news."

Maria rubbed a hand over her eyes tiredly though a small, completely genuine smile played at the edge of her lips. "He's not so different from any other parent," she said softly. "Consider this, honey." She reached out, putting her hands over their clasped fingers. "We spent 18 years raising you, making decisions for you, punishing you when it was necessary because we knew better than you what you needed. It wasn't ever easy... to let you cry or make you cry. It wasn't easy when you yelled at us or thought we were ruining your life. You never want to see your children upset or hurting." She smiled gently. "It's something you'll learn soon enough."

She tapped a finger against her cup. "I suppose parenting is as difficult when your baby is grown as it was when they were growing, especially when your child - your precious, baby boy - tells you he wants something you can't comprehend. It's a hard habit to break - thinking that you should make decisions for your child. Sometimes we forget that you're capable of deciding what's best for yourself."

Jasper glanced over at his lover, finding the look on his face contemplative. He allowed the seed of this idea to permeate the bitter anger that made it difficult to look at Deacon's point of view.

"You know, when you first told us about your ... boyfriends, we both figured it was just a phase. Having you as young as we did, I know we put the fear of God into you about getting a girl in trouble in your teens. When I was in school, my best friend used to... you know..." she glanced furtively at her son, "let her boyfriend sodomize her because that didn't count. I figured it was just a natural progression."

"Jesus, God, Mom!" Jasper exclaimed, gripping his head while Peter quietly chortled. "I can't... don't... You're not allowed to talk that way."

Maria smiled at her son ruefully. "So, they tell me I'm finally going to be a grandma?" There was a cautious sort of hope in her voice. "Now, please be patient with me, honey. I know there are a lot of ways to go about getting yourself a family, but I'm just not used to all the options out there. I get to be a grandma to this one? Not like...the other?"

Jasper sighed but nodded. "Dash is Alice and Rosalie's son," he said for the millionth time, trying to infuse his tone with the very little patience he had left.

"It's a difficult thing for me to grasp, I hope you realize. When I got pregnant at 16 with you, a lot of people were clamoring about giving you up for adoption, and do you know what your grandma said to me?"

"What's that?"

"She said 'we can't have our own blood out there wandering the world without us'." Maria shook her head a little sadly. "It's hard to accept that he's not ours."

"Well, he isn't," Jasper said flatly. Then he allowed his voice to soften. "But this one is ours. Mine and Peter's."

"How does that work?"

~0~

They had to explain the situation repeatedly.

"Okay, I get that its your baby and all," Lucy said impatiently. "But who's the father? I mean ... biologically speaking."

"We don't know that for sure, little sister," Peter finally said.

"And we don't want to know," Jasper added.

"What does that mean?" Lucy asked, her face mirroring her parents' confusion.

"Uh...it means we both... contributed to the sample," Peter stumbled awkwardly.

The other three still looked clueless.

"You really want me to explain the process to you?" Jasper asked finally.

"It's just a ... medical procedure after all," Deacon mused, looking uncomfortable.

"Fine. Clinically speaking...here's the way it works..."

Twenty minutes later, Jasper was blushing from head to toe, but his family finally understood how his baby had been conceived.

"So wait..." Lucy said, and Jasper found himself cringing at the thought of what else she could possibly ask. "This is how the other baby was conceived, for real?" She blinked sporadically. "Holy hell, Bro. You really met that Alice gal aftershe was knocked up with that baby? Man, that must have been drama. How did that work out?"

Jasper rolled his eyes. "Darlin', that's an entirely different story."

A/N: Of course, the different story is Parenthetical Love. Bwah hahaha.

What, I find myself funny on occasion...

Anyway. Thanks to jadedandboring for yelling at me...I mean betaing. And thanks to barburella for being barbi. And thanks to y'all for being... amazing.