Author's Note - In an effort to publish this chapter on my deadline (and to annoy my sister who is waiting for the King Julian/Private explanation) I have decided to shorten this chapter to only the next five. I'm also going to show some goodwill to my faithful flamer by including a special top-ten list that apparently she wishes to see.

1. Skipper/Marlene

2. Kowalski/Rico

3. Kowalski/Marlene (normally I would say it wouldn't work, but I'm trying to be nice)

4. Marlene/Private

5. Kowalski/Doris (despite the fact that the one time we see Doris she's cheating on Kowalski with Skipper)

6. Marlene/Marlene (it could happen)

7. Rico/Doll (I'm not even gonna mention the fact that she is a doll, and therefore shouldn't count)

8. Skipper/Kitka

9. Fred/Kitka (didn't she try to eat him?)

10. Marlene/Chair (apparently my flamer is under the impresson that because Marlene is a girl she can be shipped with anyone, including a very lonely chair)

11. Kowalski/Skipper - This pairing achieved some popularity awhile back but never seemed to catch on, which is understandable considering that you have to have a bit of an open-mind in order to understand why this would be a good coupling, and as I've seen so far some people don't have an open-mind. Skipper and Kowalski seem to have a close relationship that is often interrupted by their various obsession (Kowalski's inventions and Skipper's leadership skills) as evidenced in the episode where Kowalski claims that he will not relax until he has solved 87 mysteries of the universe. As also proven in the same episode Skipper has the ability to bring Kowalski out of his shell and if worse comes to worst can quite literally order him to have fun. This difference in ideals would likely benefit Kowalski greatly, but could potentially hold very little benefit for Skipper aside from companionship, which is a large flaw that has denied this couple access to the top ten.

12. Marlene/Rico - Have you ever seen those movies where the adorable yet compassionate girl falls in love with the ugly, deformed and possibly retarded man? We all seem to come across movies like these every once in a while and we watch them because they make us feel good about the human condition. This seems like a textbook romantic case and Marlene (who I'm assuming is a fan of movies of this sort) might pursue a romantic relationship for the sole purpose of enacting out one of these movies. This relationship may work out due to Rico's seeming need for feminine compassion if not for a rather large flaw. This flaw is that while in these cheesy romance movies the characters is as 'beautiful on the inside' in the female characters eyes and that tends to form the basis for this entire relationship. This is obviously flawed logic in Rico's case since he is incredibly violent and sadistic and would likely not fit Marlene's criteria. The reason this pairing is on the list is that since Rico is kind towards his doll, I assume he'd also be kind towards Marlene if they were to get together.

13. Skipper/Mother Duck - Skipper and mother duck are both very similar to one another and could essentially make for the perfect coupling. They are both 'parents' (the word used loosely in Skipper's case) with various responsibilities that admittedly keep them from forming a relationship with anyone but their 'kids'. This relationship seems perfect if not for two flaws. The first flaw is that I assume a father duck would likely get between them, and the second flaw is that they are both too busy raising their kids to pursue a relationship with one another.

14. Private/Marlene - These two characters are very similar to each other in their naivety. Which would essentially make them compatible as a couple, but just so much as they would be able to tolerate each other in a relationship. This pairing is exactly the turning point when the relationships belong won't make any sense and will bear little to no evidence within the show or with how their personalities are compatible with one another. It seems to me that a Private/Marlene pairing would likely work out through both f their needs for companionship with other animals within that zoo that share their naivety or will respect their naivety instead of attempting to educate them in the way the world actually works or attempting to take advantage of them. The only way I could see this relationship working is if Skipper somehow met his end and the two characters went to each other for comfort after his death. Otherwise I would consider this a crack pairing.

15. Skipper/Rico - These two characters appear to be the most alike out of all the penguins, and therefore would likely make a good couple if Rico didn't have a mental disability that apparently makes him prone to violence. Skipper appears to be accepting of Rico in a way that no other animal in the zoo (aside from Kowalski) seems to be able to match, and likewise Rico appears to be loyal to Skipper to the point that he'd commit suicide if Skipper told him to. Rico and Skipper could be a very good coupling, if not for the fact that the competing levels of testosterone would likely cause problems in such a relationship and that Skipper is far too busy with his position as leader to give the added time needed for a relationship with a mentally challenged penguin.

Pairings to be explained next chapter:

16. Private/Julian

17. Skipper/Kitka

18. Julian/Mort

19. Julian/Rico

20. Maurice/Marlene

Pairings explained in chapter 4:

21. Julian/Blowhole

22. Skipper/Mort

23. Private/Kowalski

24. Private/Rico

25. Skipper/Blowhole