The Seer of Light smiled and bowed her head slightly in thanks to the crocodile-headed men opening the grand doors to the Knight of Time's palace.

The doors closed behind her, and she found herself alone in the throne room. She couldn't help but think that the lofty ceilings of the royal chamber seemed odd for him; Dave had always been the sort that she was sure would have been unironically living in a tiny apartment even if he were a wealthy, godlike political figure as he and the other players had become. Indeed, he didn't live in the palace that had been granted to him when the gods descended to the universe they created, but a flat at the top of one of the apartment buildings in his nation's capital. Granted, it was a penthouse in one of the loveliest buildings that the hot and swampy country had to offer, but it didn't lessen the obvious fact that Dave ignored his palace when possible.

Still, she called out into the empty hall, knowing that wherever the young man may be, he would be able to hear her through their godlike powers of communication.

"Strider...we need to talk. Brother to sister."

She looked around the red stone hall with mild interest, waiting mere seconds before her ectosibling waltzed into the hall and sat down. She knew he had taken his sweet time—after all, manipulator of its flow or not, a seer could see what was happening—but she smiled as she approached him anyway.

"To what do I owe the pleasure of your fine gothic majesty's ass here?" Dave asked.

"It seems that you have been harassing the Heir of Breath?"

The young man showed no sign of any trepidation he may have felt at the question, simply staring with those dark black lenses. After a moment, he crossed his legs and tented his fingers.

"Shit. Now why would I go harassing my best friend. We just do the typical things all bros do. Play video games, call each other out on how bullshit their wins are, talk about hot babes and spin some sweet music. Well, he's kinda shit when it comes to writing a good lyric, but his bass lines are getting better."

"Strider, don't think that you can manage to get me off track," Rose said, her face still conveying something of a false cheer. "Don't think I don't know what you're up to."

"I'm not-"

"I have been psychoanalyzing my friends for years, Dave, and I know what's going on as much as I know that if I let you speak just then, I'd have to listen to yet another long derailing rant. You may try to distract yourself and others in this disassociation problem of yours, possibly to create some image of control to match the rest of your created persona derived to protect against the hardships of the world, but I see right through after all this time."

"Damn, Lalonde. You know how to jab that knife deep," Dave said, "stabbing me with the shiv of your words like I've got the last pack of cigarettes in the women's penitentiary and you're desperate for your nicotine fix."

"That's enough of that, Strider." Rose took a few steps closer to the throne. "I just wanted to tell you that if you think you're going to break up your sister's happy relationship, then you are terribly mistaken."

"Damn, girl. If I didn't know better, I'd think that's a threat."

"It's no threat. Simply a promise that I won't go down without some fight." She smirked. "I'm rather fond of him, after all. I don't care if you think that we aren't a good couple and you have to save the relationship from dooming itself or whatever convoluted self-centered form of knightly chivalry you have created. And if this is something even more directed towards your own self interest, I'd like to direct you to the awareness of the fact John has, on multiple occasions, stated his defined interest in people of the opposite sex."

In reality, the final word was likely not as punctuated in reality as it was in Dave's mind, and it was all that he could do to make sure that not a single hint of discomfort could be shown. There were some secrets that Rose really didn't need to know, and he hoped to god that she hadn't figured things out somewhere along the way.

Granted, it was Rose. If she had figured out that coolkid bravado was generated by laboratory testosterone, she'd never use it as a jab.

Still, he couldn't help but feel a twang of nervousness.

"Dave?"

He was still, and then let out the smallest of monosyllabic laughs.

"I never told him that I wanted to be the one boinking his brains out...or gently holding his hand, as it might be with you two."

"Oh, shut it," Rose said, almost snapping.

"Touched a nerve, did I?"

"I can keep as collected as you, dear," Rose said. "I can continue a passive aggressive exchange with the best of them."

"And that's why I love you, Rose," Dave said. "But really, if he gets so hot and bothered about me bringing up you two's shagadelic love life that you're coming here instead of getting it on tentaghost style, then maybe y'all need to reevaluate your relationship."

"You said 'y'all.'"

"Yeah, cuz I ain't no damn yankee like you. Have a problem?"

"Yes, I happen to have a number of problems with your appalling grammar."

"Sounds like good pillow talk right there."

"Oh, don't be ridiculous, Dave. Honestly, sometimes..."

"Look, Lalonde." Dave hopped off of his throne, walking to the girl and putting his hands on her shoulders. "Girl. I'm just saying. Maybe it's gotten to a point where you should realize that the kid may not belong with you."

"I'm sure he's far more of a fit with myself than with you," she said, brushing off one of Dave's hands, just for him to put it back on her shoulder.

"Well I may have to disagree with that, if only because I love the idiot, but really. You should think about the fact there are other possibilities out there. Other fish in the sea."

"If you're suggesting I go attempt to seduce Ampora I'm certain that both of his partners would be as repulsed by me as I would be with myself."

"I didn't mean it literally, you dumb broad," he said, ruffling her hair slightly with one hand, hiding his delight at her annoyed expression. "Just know there are other people close to you who might be a little more available and ready to offer you what you need in a relationship, ok? I'm just looking out for you."

"And your cock."

"Fine, and that. But mostly yours."

Rose took a step back and laughed.

"I'm not going to just give John to you."

"Nothing good is ever given up without a fight."

"As long as you understand that much."

"Crystal clear."

"Well then," Rose said, tugging lightly at the strings on her hood, "I suppose I must be off to console the poor boy from whatever horrible sexual harassment you put him through trying to investigate the private matters of our relationship."

"Hell, girl, if he feels harassed by a simple 'have you touched a boob,' then I'm not sure how he can call himself a man."

"Just try not to bother him too much?"

"Fuck no. Bothering the kid is the most fun thing since ninja-sliced bread."

"I knew you'd say something so simply moronic."

"Go do your psychoanalytical predictions elsewhere."

"No psychology needed, Dave. You're just an idiot."

"Lalonde. Tend to your virgin."

With a snicker, the Seer was off, and the Knight retreated from his throne room. Once sure he was alone, he sighed, smiling slightly to himself. He hadn't even started Project Morally Dubious Seduction, but it sounded like it was going to go swimmingly.

Good to know whatever he was going to go back in time to bother John with was going to get him so riled up. Thanks, Lalonde.