Summary: In which Castle answers questions about his marriages, Johanna Beckett is remembered, and a dance is shared. Spoilers for 4x11.

Author's Note: Holy smokes, you guys! I don't think I've ever had such a positive response to something I've written! I woke up to an inbox full of reviews, most of them asking me to write more. And since I had so much other stuff to do that was far more important, I decided to be responsible and procrastinate by writing you guys a second chapter. I really hope it lives up to all of your expectations!

Disclaimer: Despite my best efforts, I still lay no claim to Castle and its characters.

Chapter 2

True to her word, Kate emerged from the bathroom five minutes later and made her way to the bar, where Castle was seated on a stool sipping from a glass of light-colored liquid. Emotions were swirling through her like a maelstrom as she approached, the happy mixed with the sad mixed with what she could no longer deny as love. Love for her partner, the one man who she knew would always stand beside her.

Kate hoped that someday, she would have the courage to tell him how much it meant to her that he had gone to the trouble of finding his way to her heart. That he had been there for her, no matter what. And that, despite all of her faults, he still saw her as extraordinary.

With every step closer, she found herself more and more afraid of what was to come, tonight and beyond. Afraid of what could happen if they did not work out. Afraid of what could happen if they did. Her wall was still there, as were the residual effects of her PTSD, but despite it all, she was sick of pretending that she could not do this. That she was not madly in love with him.

As she neared the bar, though, Kate forced herself to suppress all of her fears, her insecurities, and her confusion for the night and just enjoy the time spent with Castle. It was not often that they got to be together without work duties calling, and she was very much enjoying their newfound closeness outside of the precinct.

With that in mind, she walked confidently over to where he sat and stepped right up to him. He immediately reached out with his free hand and found her waist, pulling her to stand in the vee of his legs. Kate smiled and went willingly.

"Hey," he said softly, eyes tender and warm.

"Hey."

He squeezed her waist slightly. "Better?"

"For now."

He nodded, seeming to accept her answer. "Want a drink?"

"Sure."

He was about to call out for the bartender when Kate took it upon herself to lean forward and snag the man's attention, ordering before turning her attention back to Castle.

While they waited on her drink, Kate's eyes trailed around, her detective instincts kicking in and causing her to scan the room, to take in everything. The newlyweds had separated for possibly the first time all night and Ryan was talking with Esposito while Jenny was hugging her mother.

Absentmindedly, Kate lifted her hand to the chain around her neck. She had not been wearing the necklace as of late, but today, she needed her mother with her. She needed to feel the ring nestled between her breasts, needed the reminder of...Kate was not sure what it was of any more. Her mother was gone. She would not be coming back. But she already knew those things. They were facts of her life that she would never forget. But somewhere deep inside of herself, some part of Kate was afraid that she would forget. That one day, she would wake up one morning and not be able to see her mother's face, hear her voice or her laugh. And whether she realized it or not, somehow, having the ring with her today made the memories stronger, made her mother feel closer again.

Kate clasped the small band between her thumb and index finger and moved to hide it back beneath the neckline of her dress when a hand reached out and snagged her wrist, halting her progress.

"Castle," she protested immediately, automatically.

"Can I see it?" he asked softly.

Kate hesitated. Though he had wormed his way into her mother's case, she was still careful about what she shared with him. He knew the cold hard facts of the case, but she had never spoken to him about her feelings following the murder, about the dark place into which she had very nearly descended. About how his books kept her afloat until she managed to find her own footing once again.

"Please?" he asked softly, his thumb caressing her wrist. Kate hoped he could not feel her racing pulse.

Kate met his eyes and saw nothing but honest curiosity and, dare she say it, love, and released the ring. The cold metal sliding through her fingers mixed with his warm hand on her wrist elicited a strange sensation that she was unable to put a name to.

Castle lifted the ring to eye level, examining it from every facet. Kate was not sure what exactly he found so interesting, but she forced herself to relax, to stop worrying about what this might mean and focus instead on the question he was asking her.

Wait, he was asking her a question?

"What?" she asked automatically.

"Was it her engagement ring?" Castle repeated.

Kate looked down at it. "Yeah."

Castle shifted it slightly as if to get a better angle. "It's really pretty."

She nodded in agreement. "Yeah."

"Thank you," he said softly, lowering the ring to her chest and gently depositing it back beneath the neckline of her dress once again. Kate startled at the feeling, at his hand so close to her exposed skin, but she did not pull away.

Their eyes met, heaps of emotion passing between them, and while Castle seemed to be quite content in the moment, Kate was struggling to comprehend what had just happened. Why it had meant so much to him that she had just allowed him to see her mother's ring.

Whatever it was, though, Kate would have to ponder it later, as the bartender returned just then with her drink. Kate thanked the man and took a sip, forcing her questions to the back of her mind for the time being.

Castle's eyes followed her movements as she set her glass back on the bar and adjusted her dress, but when she caught him staring, Kate simply offered a shrug and a small smile.

"Excuse me, miss," said a voice from behind her said suddenly, and Kate turned to find a woman trying to reach the bar.

"Oh, I'm sorry," Kate replied politely, stepping out of her way and, in the process, further into Castle. His hand that was on her waist...she had not even realized it was still there...slid around to her lower back as he simply accepted her into his personal space. Not that he ever had a problem with her being there.

Kate looked down, finding her face far too close to his, and awkwardly froze.

"Hey," Castle called softly, drawing her from her panic. He touched her arm with his free hand. "Relax, Kate."

"I..." she released a breath, long and slow, and tried again. "I'm sorry, it's just...it's a lot."

Castle dropped his hand and lightened his touch on her back. "If you want me to back off..."

Kate cut him off with a shake of the head. "No, it's fine, it's just..." Just what? Too tender of a touch? Too much love in his eyes? Too much love in the air? Too many strong feelings floating through her, all battling for dominance?

He pressed gently against her lower back. "Come here."

Despite the voices in her head screaming that this was a bad idea, Kate stepped closer, one hand rising to rest on his shoulder again. Castle's other hand found its way to the small of her back and almost before she comprehended what was happening, he was hugging her, his head pressed to her chest.

Heat raced through her body at the feeling of his breath against her skin, his hands holding her firmly. Kate took a deep, shaky breath, and Castle automatically tightened his grip on her.

"You okay?"

No, Kate wanted to answer. She was overwhelmed. She missed her mom. She loved the man who was currently hugging her. She was quickly becoming addicted to this increased physical contact between them, but at the same time, she was scared of where it may lead. Of how much more she could handle tonight. But despite it all, she was happy and warm. And it just felt so right, being in his arms.

"Yeah," she answered, her voice slightly too forced to be completely convincing.

"Is this too much?" he asked against her skin, his lips brushing across her clavicle. Kate could not be sure if it was accidental or intentional, but either way, her body's reaction was very real. And far too intense to be caused by a set of lips.

"No." She faltered, unsure of how to completely convey what she was feeling. Although she would first have to be able to comprehend her emotions before she could share them, so for once, Kate let her heart do the talking instead. She could analyze it all to death later.

The words that came out, however, were not at all what either one of them was expecting.

"This is perfect just like this."

Thirty minutes later found the couple once again on the dance floor, wrapped in each other's embrace and swaying softly.

Kate had long ago lost track of what song was playing, or how many songs they had already danced to. Hell, she could not even be sure that there was anyone else on the dance floor right now. All she was sure of was that Castle's body was warm and solid against her, that his arms were strong around her waist, his hands firm against her lower back, his fingers absent-mindedly tracing patterns on the fabric of her dress.

Her arms were wrapped securely around his neck, her fingers fiddling with the collar on his shirt (he had long ago ditched his suit jacket). Her chin was resting on his shoulder, eyes closed, as she breathed him in and relished in the feeling of being surrounded by him.

Someday soon, she hoped that they would spend much more time wrapped around each other like this.

A couple of songs later, Ryan and Jenny danced by and smiled happily at the pair. Kate smiled back and Castle winked and Ryan chuckled as he twirled Jenny around. The bride laughed as well, her eyes laced with joy and love as they met her husband's, and Kate felt a spark of jealousy as she observed the carefree openness between the two.

"I want that," she murmured as she watched them dance away.

"What?"

She lifted her head and fixed her gaze on the newlyweds. "Happiness. Love."

God, he wanted that too. With her. More than anything. But right now was probably not the time to pour his heart out, not when he could tell that Kate was struggling with her emotions.

"You will, Kate," he finally replied, settling on something ambiguous yet optimistic. He hoped it was implied that he was the other party in that eventual equation.

"You were right, you know," she said softly, her eyes still focused on Ryan and Jenny.

"Hmmm?"

"When you said I hid behind my mom's case. That I was afraid to be happy." She sighed. "I was. I am."

"Why?" Castle asked hesitantly, hoping that was not beyond the scope of what she was willing to answer.

Kate shrugged. "The stronger the feelings, the harder the fall."

"It is a risk," he agreed. "But it's so worth it, Kate."

"I'm starting to see that," she admitted.

"Yeah?"

She turned her head just enough to press a kiss to the corner of his mouth. "Yeah."

Happy Holidays!

Thoughts?