12/24/2011

Jade looked back up at me like she wanted to say something, but couldn't. It reminded me of earlier in the hallway this morning. I don't think that she was excepting me to be here. I just had to know where my son was. the minute the lunch bell rang I hopped in my car and drove here. Thank god it was the only daycare that accepts babies Mason's age with in miles of school.

When I got here I walked inside and asked the lady at the front desk if I could see Mason, stating that I was his dad. But the problem was that Jade only listed her self as a parent and not me. could she really be that mad to consider herself a single parent now. I know that I messed up and I get that, but come one she will never be a single parent. I would never ever leave Jade in that situation. I looked back down at Mason who was staring at me with his big blue eyes. His eyes are what amazed me the most. The were identical to Jades and showed the same determination as hers did. I didn't think that I could miss him so much in only 3 days.

"Jade you know that he doesn't have to go here." I said finally breaking the silence between us.

"What choice do I have. Where not together anymore so where else is he going to stay during the day?" That last sentence really hurt. Why couldn't she just accept that I messed up and that I deeply regret it.

"Jade is that what you really want is for us to be done when we have this little guy." I replied. I could tell that my voice sounded pleading.

"Well what do you want me to Beck? Did you really think that it takes three days to get over what you did to me. the worst part is that it wasn't just a kiss, it was more."

She almost shouted the last sentence. I decided to start rocking Mason back in forth in my arms to put him to sleep. I hated it when he was up and Jade and I where fighting. Scratch that because I hate it when we fight around him period.

"Jade how many times do I have to say that I'm sorry. You don't know how hard it is for me to know that I hurt you. I have to live with that the rest of my life knowing that I did something that bad to you and him." I looked back down at Mason who's breathing was starting to slow.

"You should have never done it in the first place. You don't think that this is hard for me to. Every night I'm left wondering what would have happened if I didn't come looking for you at the party. would you have gone farther then you already did with that chick? Would you even tell me?" Those are questions that I ask my self too.

"What do you want me to do Jade? I love you and I will do anything to get you back not just for me but for Mason too. You said that you never wanted to end up like your parents and have Mason put into a situation like this. Do you really want him going in between my house and yours?" I know that I struck a chord with the whole parents thing, but that is what she said. She looked at the ground again as she spoke.

"Can you just give me time then. What you did hurt Beck and its going to take me awhile to forgive you, but I still love you. I wish that I didn't right now, but I do. I just cant jump back into being with you so fast."

"So what does that mean?"

"It means that I going to need a while before I rush back into a relationship with you. so when I'm ready ill tell you but for now I'm no where near that. so for now were not together." Mason had fallen soundly asleep in my arms by now and I just heard the most amazing news ever. If all she wanted was time, then ill give her time. Plus the whole 'for now' thing added hope.

"So does that mean you'll take him out of here." I begged. I know that she hated daycares. When Mason was born and I asked her what she wanted to do about childcare when we go back to school , the first thing that she said was that there was no way in hell that her son was attending daycare. I don't know what she had against it, but I know that she didn't want him in it.

"Where else can I take him while were at school?"

"My mom Jade. She was our original babysitter in the first place."

"She would really still watch him even though were not together?"

"Yeah she misses him very much. She was really looking forward to looking after him anyways." I replied. I felt a smile creeping on my face. But I let it vanish quickly to not give Jade the wrong impression.

"But how are we going to work this out? who's going to keep him at night and on the weekends and-"

"Why don't you just move back in." I said cutting her off.

"I said give me time Beck and my moving back into the RV is not time."

"I know just move back into house then. You can sleep Mason's room in their and my old bed is in there." My mom insisted that we turn my old room into an extra room for Mason. She said that he would need one when he grew out of the RV. I tried telling her that I didn't want to because I had planned on getting a job after senior year so I can support Jade and Mason on my own and stop allowing my parents to fund everything for him. They bought him everything from clothes to baby food(Jade refused to breast feed.)

"I don't think that I can do that Beck."

"Come on babe- I mean Jade I know that you don't like living at your dad's house." I still cant believe that he even let her back in the house after he kicked her out for being pregnant with Mason.

"I'd rather live there then in the same house as your parents. There not my biggest fans either."

"Jade this weekend my parents favored you over me, Especially my mother. She lectured me on how I wasn't a good boyfriend or father to hurt you so bad."

"Wait you told your mom that you cheated on me?"

"She figured it out on her own."

"Oh."

"so can you just think about moving into the house. It'll make our situation a lot easier. That way we wont have to fight over who gets him this day and who gets him that day. We at least have to try to be a family for our son. We promised each other that remember."

"Well you seem to be breaking a lot of your promises." She glared at me. Mason started to stir in my arms and I knew that he was uncomfortable.

"Jade I'm sorry."

"I know." she then got up and headed towards her car. Was she really leaving me here with Mason. Before I could get up and follow her she was back pushing Mason's stroller.

"I saw that he fell asleep so here." she said pushing the stroller in my direction. I slowly put Mason down in the stroller and strapped him. Thank god that he didn't wake up when I placed him in the stroller.

"So what do you wanna do now?" I sighed.

"I don't know. I told the daycare lady that I wasn't bringing him back today."

"Can you at least let my mom have him during the day. That saves money right?"

"My dad is paying for this place."

"Well it will save him money them."

"Okay, okay. She can watch him I just cant live there."

"Alright then. Can we take him there now?"

"I have no plan getting back to school."

I'm taking that as a yes so i got up and stood behind Mason's stroller. Jade grabbed his bags stood not to far from me.

"Your car or mine?" i asked.

"Do you still have that baby on board sticker in place?" I nodded my head.

"Then mine."

We walked only a few feet apart with her taking over the stroller pushing. If time was all she needed its all that I'm willing to give.

So I was thinking to myself today and I decided that I wouldn't add the surprises yet because then I would rush the story. But don't worry the surprises will be reveled in the next three chapters!:) I need your help though. Do you want Jade to still live with her father or live with Becks parents so she can still be close to Beck. Tell me in a review. Lets try to get to 62 reviews!

PS- sorry for grammar mistakes…

SHOUT OUTS:

ROCKETS LOVE: don't worry Jade and Bailey wont fall for each other. he's gonna be there for her alot in this story like a best friend. But there is another person that she might be falling for in the near future. I just have to decide between two people I can have her end up with. I also love that you re-read this story:) I tend to do that with a lot of stories! I'm not Jewish so I celebrate Christmas. And I kept my promise this time. But don't worry this is Bade endgame!

BADEOBSSESSER: I updated. Thanks for loving this story:)

BUTTERFLIESONTHEWALL: thanks for both reviews! I know that Jade is torn and I kind-of like it though, but it wont end that way. Your right Bailey is a great name if they had a girl:)

JEREMY SHANE: Thanks a lot! I can always count on you to review:)

LIZGILLIESFANFOREVER: thanks for reviewing all the time:) thanks for loving this story.