A Garden In December Chapter 3, a glee fanfic

As soon as Kurt was aware of himself, aware of more than just blackness and nothingness, he realized that he was lying down on his stomach.

The asphalt ground was rough against his skin as he came to realize his surroundings. A cool mist was setting upon him.

He opened his eyes to see that he was lying on the bridge- the same one he had tried to jump from, to kill himself.

"Hey, baby," a soft, feminine voice that Kurt knew very well spoke from above him.

Kurt picked up his head. In front of him stood his mother, hand outstretched to help him up. He took it and she pulled him to his feet.

"Mom," he whispered, wrapping her in a hug. She was soft, warm- just like he remembered.

Elizabeth Hummel was as beautiful in death as she had been in life. Her chestnut hair flowed down her shoulders and her long eyelashes swept against her cheeks every time she blinked.

"Oh, sweetheart," Her arms wrapped around his shoulders, embracing him tightly, "I never wanted to see you here."

"Am I dead?" Kurt asked, pulling away from her.

"No, not yet," His mother told him, "You're in a coma." She pulled him under her arm. "I have a few things to show you before you get to make that choice. After I'm done, you can choose if you'd like to go back or go on."

"Is it nice, going on?" Kurt asked her.

"It's beautiful, baby." She stroked his face warmly, "But I think you have a lot more potential from your life than you thought you did."

"I miss you, mom- so much. I wish you hadn't had to go." Kurt buried his face in her shoulder and cried.

"Hey now, no more tears." She pushed him away enough to see his face. "I'm not in any more pain, and I'm happy. I get to watch you grow into the incredible man that you are, I get to see your father be truly happy again. I miss being able to hold you every day, but the time I had with you was enough. You truly don't realize how beautiful and innocent your soul is, Kurt. You have such a capacity for love and no room for hate. When I was little, my father used to tell me that 'God gives us children so that we can have roses in December'. Kurt, you brought us a garden full of them. You always found new ways to see the world more compassionately, and when someone didn't agree, instead of fighting them on it, you invited them to come and stand beside you and see the world from your perspective. You change people's hearts, Kurt." Elizabeth smiled, "I know you changed your father's and mine. You changed Blaine's."

"Blaine," Kurt whispered. It hurt to let Blaine go, more than anything ever had before. It felt like his heart was torn to shreds. The only thing that he could find hope in is that one day Blaine would find someone to be happy with again, someone better than Kurt.

"He loves you, Kurt. More than I think you know or realize. He comes and talks to me a lot." Elizabeth stroked his hair.

"He does?" Kurt asked her.

"About once a week or so, actually. He comes and sits with me and he tells me all about you and how beautiful he thinks you are and how much that he adores you and that he never wants to be apart from you and that he's scared that you'll find someone better than him when you go to college, but he wouldn't protest because he wants you to be happy, and he wants the best for you."

"There isn't anyone else for me that could make me happier than he does. Blaine was it for me. I was worried that I could never be enough for him." Kurt told her.

"Kurt, that boy adores you. I think it's time you saw what you came here to see." She grabbed his hand and together they began to walk into the must, emerging in a hospital hallway.

There was a doctor in the hallway standing with his father, Carole, Finn, and Blaine. It was obvious nobody could see Kurt or Elizabeth.

The doctor was talking, "The blow that he took to the head was more severe than we originally anticipated, and he's slipped into a coma. We're very positive about his condition; he just needs some extra time for his brain to heal before he can wake up. The coma is the brain's way of protecting itself while it fixes itself."

"How long can we expect this to last?" Burt asked the doctor.

Blaine seemed unnaturally quiet, Kurt noted. His head was hung and his hands were in his pockets.

"Mr. Hummel, honestly, I don't have an answer for you right now. He could wake up tonight; it could take him a few weeks. It all depends on him now- he's going to heal at his own rate. " The doctor seemed saddened that he couldn't deliver better news.

There was a dull thump and Kurt looked over to see Blaine sitting against the wall, head in-between his knees, shoulders shaking. Finn walked over and put his hand on Blaine's shoulder and Kurt wanted to yell at him for being so insensitive. Kurt walked over to Blaine and went to wrap him in a hug when his hands went right through him.

Oh, right. He wasn't real.

"You don't know how many times I've seen you hurt, seen you crying over the past years and wished there was something I could do, but there never was." Elizabeth told him quietly.

"I need to go back. He's in so much pain." Kurt whispered, " I need to be there with him, I need to hold him."

"We still have a few things to see." Elizabeth told him. "He shouldn't be the sole reason for you to return. After I show you what's next, you can decide whether it's worth going back for."

They walked out of the hospital hallway and into a familiar room. A dome shaped window gleamed overhead as a beautiful white staircase curled into a grand landing. The foot of Dalton's main staircase was packed with people Kurt recognized: family, friends, and acquaintances alike.

A few stairs from the bottom, Blaine stood with an older man. Finn, Thad, Jeff, Sam, and Mike were on the stairs below his. On the opposite side of the staircase stood Mercedes, Rachel, Tina, Brittany and Santana, all in beautiful navy dresses.

Music began to play and Blaine and the audience turned to look up the stairway. Blaine's eyes lit up at something Kurt couldn't see from his vantage point. A gorgeous smile appeared on Blaine's face and it looked as if all of his cares in the world had been lifted at that moment.

Kurt moved closer to see what Blaine could possibly be looking at and was startled to see himself, his face holding an expression similar to Blaine's.

"Our wedding day," Kurt whispered to himself, tears streaming down his face. His future self looked so happy, so content, and once he reached the stair Blaine was on and stood beside him, he looked so at home that Kurt's heart ached. This was the love that he'd been looking for his whole life- his fairy tale ending.

"It doesn't matter," Kurt told his mom. "I may not be needed by dad or Finn or New Directions, but Blaine does need me, mom. He's the one I've been waiting my whole life for, and I can't wait for this day to come."

Elizabeth smiled at him, "This is my favorite day to watch. But baby, I don't think you understand how much your dad and Finn and the glee club could care if you just let them in. You're such a private person and it takes so much for you to let someone else know that you're hurting. Let them know, tell them that you're hurting and they may surprise you. No matter what your father and Finn do together, you're still his baby boy that he brought up and taught how to ride a bike. You're still Finn's brother. I know you may not feel like the glee club cares sometimes, but I promise that they do. And they'll be there when you need them most."

In the background, Kurt and Blaine were given permission to kiss and everyone applauded.

"There's one more thing you need to see, before you decide." Elizabeth took his hand again and they were in the New Directions choir room.

Mr. Schue was telling the rest of the glee club about Kurt's coma and they looked stricken. All of the girls were in tears, and most of the boys looked like they were close to it. Everyone just looked dead. Blaine wasn't there.

"See, they do care. You just need to give them the opportunity to."

Kurt watched as they completed a whole weeklong assignment just for him. Rachel and Mercedes sang "For Good" from Wicked. Sugar Motta sang a beautiful rendition of "Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again" from Phantom. Tina and Mike sang a duet of Sarah McLachlan's "Angel". Brittany and Santana did a duet of Beyonce's "Halo". Finn went for a song he'd already done and sang "I'll Stand By You", but there was not a dry eye in the room afterwards. Sam, Puck, Artie and Rory sang Mumford and Sons' "Little Lion Man". Kurt cried more than once at how beautiful it all was, how much they obviously cared for him.

"Time to go, baby." Elizabeth grabbed his hand and they were in Kurt's hospital room.

Kurt's body looked pale against the bedsheets, and Kurt stared down at himself, regretting the quick minded decision he'd made to jump off the bridge that had cost more pain than he ever realized. Blaine was sitting in a chair at his bedside, holding Kurt's hand, talking to him quietly. It was just Blaine in the room with Kurt's body, so Kurt figured his dad and Carole must be at work and Blaine must be skipping school to stay with him.

Kurt sat on the bed beside where Blaine was holding his hand, resting his hand on top of Blaine's warm one and his own cooler one. He knew Blaine couldn't possibly know that he was there, but he still thought it might comfort him in some small way. Blaine looked extraordinarily tired and his eyes were puffy from all of the crying. Kurt began to listen to what he was saying to Kurt's body.

"… and everyone, they sang songs for you this week in glee club, I wish you could be there to hear it, love. Everybody misses you so much. I miss you so much. I need you to wake up, baby. If you don't wake up, I don't know what I'm going to do. I- I have a song to sing for you too, okay?" Blaine let go of his hand and got up from the chair to grab his guitar that was in the corner.

He sat back down in the chair and began to strum. Kurt recognized the song, Aerosmith's "I Don't' Want To Miss A Thing", but a slower, acoustic version.

I could lie awake just to hear you breathing
Watch you smile while you are sleeping
Well you're far away dreaming
I could spend my life in this sweet surrender
And just stay here lost in this moment forever
Well, every moment spent with you
Is a moment I treasure

Blaine's voice was shaking with suppressed tears and tiredness, but it was still one of the most beautiful renditions of the song Kurt had ever heard.

I don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
I'd still miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing

Lying close to you
Feeling your heart beating
And I'm wondering what you're dreaming
Wondering if it's me you're seeing
Then I kiss your eyes and thank God we're together
And I just wanna stay with you
Just stay in this moment forever, forever and ever

By this time, Kurt, Blaine, and Elizabeth were all in tears, and Kurt knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that this boy was the one he wanted to spend the rest of his life with, the one he wanted to be everything to and wanted to be his everything.

I don't wanna miss one smile
I don't wanna miss one kiss
Well, I just wanna be with you
Right here with you, just like this
I just wanna hold you close
Feel your heart so close to mine
And stay here in this moment
For all the rest of time

Don't wanna close my eyes
Don't wanna fall asleep, yeah
I don't wanna miss a thing

At the end of the song, Blaine put his guitar on the ground very ungracefully and grabbed Kurt's hand again with both hands.

"Please wake up. Please. I love you so much. Please wake up." Blaine seemed to have dissolved into a mantra of pleadings and declarations, winding down to the point where he eventually cried himself to sleep, his head pillowed on his arms, both hands still wrapped around one of Kurt's.

"It's time, baby. It's time to make your choice." Elizabeth put her hand on his shoulder. "At this point, you can choose if you'd like to go back, or go on. Going on, you wouldn't have to suffer anymore, there would be no more bullying, no more tears, no more hurts, and I think you've had enough of that to last a lifetime. You have to decide if this world is worth going back for. You have to decide if you're willing to go back to this world, if what you've seen has changed your mind about the decision you made to live your life."

She pulled him up to stand in front of her and the hospital room disappeared. "Kurt Christopher Hummel. You made the decision to kill yourself. You have the choice now to change that decision. What would you like to choose?"

Kurt stared back into his mother's face. No more pain. An eternity with his mother, and eventually everyone else would join him. Or a world of pain. A world of hurt. A world where he would have to fight for the right to love the boy he cared about more than anything. He now had to choose, between his mother or Blaine. Eventually, no matter what he chose, he would have both, but for now, he had to decide between one or the other.

Kurt took a deep breath. "I've made my decision."

A/N: I know you'll all hate me for leaving it there but it's the perfect place to!