1. b. Uniform
Tuxedo Kamen watched hungrily, fighting an inner desire as Sailor Moon spun with her tiara, her skirt rising up around her.
He gulped as the youma dissolved into a pile of dust and Sailor Moon sauntered over, her fuku swaying around her hips.
"Tuxedo Kamen-sama..."
"Sailor Moon. Perhaps..." Tuxedo Kamen's voice cracked as his eyes drifted downward again, and he forced them back up as he cleared his throat, focusing on her eyes instead. "Perhaps you, uhh, might consider getting...you know, getting your uniform, err...lengthened a bit...? You know, because all those tabloids...some of them...you know, think...that it's slightly...ahh...revealing..." Tuxedo Kamen flinched, and he hoped that Sailor Moon didn't decide to turn her moon-dusting tiara on him for once.
Instead, however, Sailor Moon did something far more unexpected. She sighed, and Usagi set down her script and faced the audience in exasperation.
"I'm sorry; I can't do this anymore. This device-if it can even be called that-has been used TEN THOUSAND times! Yes, we all agree that my senshi uniform is too short, but HEY-it's NOT. MY. FAULT." Usagi paused to let out a noise of disgust, and placed her hands on her hips.
"If you're really so bothered by it, why don't you take it up with Takeuchi-sama herself! It's not like I write the scripts! I have no say WHATSOEVER in my costumes! I mean, HONESTLY, a transformation BROOCH? The last time they were in style, indoor plumbing hadn't been invented yet! Oh sure, all the other senshi get transformation sticks, but I, being the fearless leader, get a brooch. While we're at it, how about we throw in a transformation buckle too! Or a transformation bonnet!"
"And what about these boots? Whose idea was that? Do you realize how DIFFICULT it is to walk or run, much less, FIGHT in BOOTS? Or my arm-length-freaking ARM -LENGTH-gloves! WHAT, am I going to a ball or something?" Usagi finally ran out of breath, and panted angrily as she stepped down from the stage.
"That's it. I'm done for today. I'll be back tomorrow when you've all had time to come up with some other plotline that doesn't involve Mamoru being tempted to think about doing things to me that he's too honorable to ever even consider. Ugh. I swear; all you fanfiction authors are nothing more than a bunch of hentai."
Usagi disappeared out the door, and Mamoru, who was left standing on stage, finally deposited his script on the floor alongside Usagi's, and spoke.
"Hey, if you guys do decide to talk to Takeuchi-sama...Can you also ask her-I mean, I appreciate the fact that this is a shoujo anime but...these roses don't really DO anything except make me look rather gay..."