Disclaimer: I don't own twilight but I wish I did.

Ok everyone I'm back. Sorry about the long wait, I am a freshman in high school after all and I had mid-terms last week. But I got my grades back and I did amazing so I'm extra happy. Thank you for all the reviews and e-mails.

Ok now on with chapter 8.

BPOV

I've been hauled up in my room for two days now. I've been in the same position since Angela dropped me off on Thursday. I haven't eaten, slept or bathed in days. I probably should rethink the last one considering it's starting to smell like something died in here.

I keep praying that Thursday was just a bad dream, which could be a possibility considering all the nightmares I have, but all the frantic text messages from Angela proves that likelihood a mistake. I just want to disappear from existence. I'm not ready to deal with this; three days just isn't long enough to come to terms with all of the new developments in my life.

Charlie has been poking his head in and out periodically. I think he's afraid I'm going to harm myself again. I promised him and myself that I wasn't ever going to cut again. Being so out of control and dependent on it really made me realize that I needed to stop before it became an addiction. But just because I said I was never going to do it aagain doesn't mean that I don't still crave it.

I've stopped taking my medication. I've been hoarding them under my pillow so I don't raise suspicion with Charlie. The black fog unnerves me. It's so thick I'm almost as if it swallows me whole. And the nightmares have even managed to get worse, if that's even possible. I know if Charlie finds them he's sending to a clinic for good so now I have to be extra secretive. Normally I can tell the difference between reality and fantasy, but here, in the darkness, everything comes to life. I even fear that they might murder me in my sleep. That's why I try to evade sleep at any cost. I can't let my subconscious trick me especially now when I'm trying to make sense of the problem at hand.

He's been very understanding for the past two days. On Thursday, he must have gotten suspicious when he came and didn't have dinner waiting for him; there's always dinner waiting for him. He came up to my room probably expecting the worst because when he saw me he was still worried, but I could see the relief on his face. He slowly approached the side of my bed and knelt down so our eyes met. His eyes were pleading with me to confide in him.

I lowered my gaze and told him.I told him that the Cullen's were back. I told him how they would be at school tomorrow and I begged him if I could stay home tomorrow since it would Friday and I could at least have the weekend to figure out what to do.

He signed back a hesitant yes. He didn't want to agree to me being a coward and I escaping my problems, but he knew I was hurting. He didn't like the idea of Edward resurfacing almost as much as I did. He knew Edward was the reason I was so depressed all the time.

Depressed putting it lightly.

I returned my gaze from his hands to his eyes and I was truly scared.

Charlie's eyes were black and hard. I didn't see my awkward father who used to play hide and seek and give me piggy-back rides as a child.

He wanted to kill.

I practically had to drag him away from the front door when he claimed he just wanted to "talk" with Edward. I didn't need my father to fight my battles; I was a big girl and that's when I knew hiding and running away from the problem was childish.

I'm going to face Edward tomorrow hold my ground and stay strong.

Cullen's are here in Forks.

Edward is here in Forks.

Everyone knows.

Tomorrow is going to suck.

I woke up Monday morning feeling sick. I scarcely made it to the bathroom in time to empty the scare amount of content out of my stomach. What a great way to start the day.

Since I'm already in the bathroom I brush my teeth and take a scorching hot shower. I dress simply but nice since this will be the day I see the Cullen's and I don't want them to think that I let myself go because of their absence; which is exactly what happened but they didn't need to know that. I'm far too nervous to eat so I just head out. I run to my car to escape the path of the cursed rain drops.

I pull into the school parking lot, practically shaking in anxiety, fear and anger. I catch sight of the famous Volvo and park as far away from it as possible. How many days I've dreamed it would appear in this very place and now I'm running away from it.

Ironic isn't it.

I park as close to the school's main entrance as possible, just in case I need to make a speedy getaway. I get out of the car to see Angela already leaning against the passenger side door. I walk over to her trying to reign in my nerves so the whole student body didn't witness how tense I was.

Angela takes my face into her tiny hands so I have to look at her and says, "He's in there Bella. All of them are, but you know I have your back, right? He's been asking about you since Friday and I've been ignoring him, so has most of the student body. They hate them almost as much as I do. None of them are in your classes so your Cullen free until lunch.''

I let out a sigh of relief, I was dreading having to sit in a 45 minute class with any of them. I told myself I was going to confront them, but until I'm ready I don't want to see a single Cullen.

I shook my head to show my understanding and Angela and I walked hand in hand into one of the worst days of my life.

All day I was constantly looking over my shoulder to make sure there wasn't a vampire on my tail. I didn't pay attention at all in class; that was normal for me now. Everyone was staring again, but I didn't know what they were staring for. Were they waiting for me to have a meltdown or to curse Edward out? Well if they wanted any of that they would have to wait a little longer. I still haven't quite made up my mind about how I wanted our first meeting to go, but I did know I was going to be furious. I didn't want Edward to see how upset I was so I was going to be angry instead. When I didn't know how to deal with a situation I turned to anger; it was an easy emotion to hide your true feelings behind.

When English was over I collected my things and ran to the cafeteria in hopes that they wouldn't be there yet and I didn't have to face them alone. The corner table where they normally reside was luckily vacant. I sat down and tried to catch my breath while I waited for Angela. The table started to fill up and I was thankful for the other bodies because they acted like camouflage for me to disguise myself in. Angels insisted that I eat something which wouldn't be such a bad idea since I am trying to keep up appearances so I take the apple off of her tray and take a massive bite.

All during lunch I could feel their gazes from the corner on my back, but I knew turning around wouldn't be a good idea so I just did my hardest to ignore it and pretend they don't exist which is a lot harder than I expected. The whole atmosphere was tense and it was so bad at a point I was going to bolt out of there to get some air, but I knew that would just start talk and I had to suck-it up and be strong.

After lunch Angela escorted me to Biology. She hasn't left my side all day and I'm so grateful to her kindness. I've never deserved it and I know I'm constantly in debt.

Biology holds so many memories that I wish I could forget but have infested in my brain. This is where we met, where we got to know each other, where I started to figure out his secret; some of the best memories reside here at this very table I shared with him.

And I hate it.

I want to leave this town and forget everything that has happened here or at least change the outcome of my birthday party. I never blamed Jasper for essentially hunting me. I was the careless one who had to ruin it because of a stupid paper cut. I knew Jasper was the newest to the vegetarian lifestyle and I knew my blood's temptation was too great for him to disregard. I know Jasper was ashamed for what he did and I would never hold him responsible for Edward leaving; that was all Edward's decision.

I go to my last two classes as normal and breathe a sigh of relief when I see everyone file out of the room to go home. I scurried off to my locker and deposited my books. I searched around to make sure the coast was clear and I really wished I hadn't. At the end of the hallway Emmett stood with an overjoyed, but apologetic look on his features. I never realized how much I missed the man who was my brother in almost every way that mattered. But he did me wrong too. He left without even a good-bye. I bolted down the hallway, towards the side exit. I pushed past the sea of bodies, I even think I knocked a girl down but I was too caught up in my getaway to care. Normally Emmett could have caught me easily but since were in public his vampire speed is rendered useless.

I keep walking until I'm a few feet from the safety of my car when I bump into a cold stone wall.

Damn it. Silly me for thinking I could run away from a vampire.

The stone wall is tall and sculpted.

Edward.

Facing Emmett would be an improvement than having to face him.

I'm stopped dead in my tracks and situate my gaze to his feet hoping that if I don't acknowledge maybe he'll go away. But I know he can see me and I'm positive he can hear my frantic heartbeat in my chest as well.

His long cold finger reaches down and tucks his digit underneath my chin so that I become face to face with the last person I thought I would ever see again.

My dreams didn't do him justice .He looks even better than I remember.

If that's even possible.

His hair was still in the curly bronze disarray atop his head. His scent hit me like a ton of bricks and I almost fell weak at the knees. He was dressed in a simple white V-neck, dark wash jeans and leather jacket. It was simple but Edward looked stunning in anything.

I saved his eyes for last. They were that warm golden color that I've grown accustomed to. But they didn't hold the same glow. They held pain, sadness, longing. They had dark circles underneath them almost as if he was tired which I knew was impossible but to the unsuspecting human he just looked worn-out.

But part of me just ached to bury myself in his embrace and comfort the sad angel but my better judgment said "No Bella, he left you, hurt you, he'll probably do it again, you can't trust him."

He should be happy, I expected him to have moved on found another stupid human girl to infatuate himself with. Use his magical dazzling powers to con some other innocent girl to believe his lies.

My mind said one thing but my body just felt so overjoyed at Edward's presence it was hard to remember I was angry at him.

I have dreamed of this happening for months and what I would say to him but right know I'm drawing a blank. I have no clue what I want and I'm just so distraught.

Edward and I just stared at each other for the longest time in the middle of the now crowded parking lot. The whole student body was witnessing the reunion but I didn't care; if they're going to gossip at least it will be true.

I wanted to move and get out of his path but my legs were frozen. His gaze was just so hypnotizing I couldn't break the spell. Eventually he snapped out of whatever trance was holding him and said,

"Bella I'm so sorry this wasn't supposed to happen and I regret my decision to leave you. I love you. I never stopped; I thought about you every day. I was lying when I said I didn't love you, I just wanted to protect you from what I am. You deserve happiness and a long human life but I just couldn't stay away anymore….."

He continued speaking but it was too fast for me to be able to read but it's not like I was trying to anyway; I stopped listening after "I love you".

That didn't make any sense. He never loved me, he said so himself. Was he lying then or is he lying now?

I was aware of a pair of cold hands lock around my wrists and I immediately shied away from the contact. It wasn't Edward's fault; my brain knew it was him and that he wouldn't hurt me physically that is but my body knew that cold hands meant danger and my body was acting defensively. And to tell you the truth I really didn't want Edward to touch me; I can't think straight when he touches me. I wanted to have him hold me while I bawled for all the dreadful things that have transpired however crying is a weakness and I wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of seeing me cry.

Edward had a look of hurt decorate his face. I wanted so much to apologize for making him unhappy but I have to stay strong; he hurt me, broke my heart he deserves some pain.

And with that I lost all sense of my sanity and spoke for the first time in 7 months.

"Liar".

Ok so Chapter 8. Wow. So Edward finally appeared, thank goodness for that. Any ways remember to review and I will hopefully see you next week. Bye!