The Day House was Nice 2: The Sequel

I don't own House MD or anything I make fun of. But I do own my character, Rikki.

WARNING: This fanfiction may cause (but not limited to): laughing, heart attack, mental scarring, medical problems, Vicodin cravings (yes, that means you House), House MD addiction, mutations, increased risk of you being admitted into Princeton Plainsboro Teaching Hospital, suicide, homicide, and random couples you may never expect from House MD.

Half way through the test, the whole team was staring at House and the screens. House just drank his tenth cup of coffee in the past thirty minutes. Rikki was ready to get the heck out of the machine and jump out a window before things got any worse, that's why House strapped her down in the machine so she wouldn't attempt it.

"House, are you sure your feeling alright?" Cameron asked.

"Oh, I'm absolutely fabulous." House replied.

"Either you took to much Vicodin, or we are seriously screwed." Chase said.

"I think it's both." Foreman said.

Rikki lifted her head slightly, asking:

"Is this over yet?"

"Yeah, it looks clean." Foreman replied.

Chase then noticed something on the screen.

"Rikki? You alright?" Chase asked.

The team heard nothing, so Chase, Cameron, and Foreman went up to Rikki as she came out of the machine.

"Rikki, you there?" Cameron asked.

Foreman looked at Rikki's eyes with his laser pen.

"She's having an absent seizure..." Foreman said.

"Are you sure?" Taub asked.

Chase raised up Rikki's arm and let it fall back down.

"That pretty much sums it up." Chase said.

Rikki started to snap out of the absence seizure a minute later as Foreman, Chase, and Cameron got her into a wheelchair.

Two hours later, Rikki was asleep in a hospital bed. House, Wilson, and Cuddy were standing outside the door, talking. Wilson sighed and asked:

"House, what are you on?" Wilson asked, putting his right hand onto his forehead.

"Nothing but happy!" House replied.

"Ok, I'm pretty damn sure this isn't House." Wilson told Cuddy.

"I searched his entire home, nothing. I even checked the tracking chip I implanted under each of his team's skins. They're all here." Cuddy said.

"Wait, when did you-" Wilson asked.

"Between each episode." Cuddy said. "To make sure you guys aren't doing anything insane."

"Anyways..." Wilson paused. "What about the patient?"

"You mean our absolutely-positively emotionally-disturbed-but-at-the-same-time-smart-alic patient Rikki?" House asked.

"House, you got her emotionally-disturbed in the first place." Cuddy said.

"I know, isn't that so happy?! Anyways, Rikki had an absent seizure after the MRI." House stated.

"Is she alright?" Wilson asked.

"We're figuring that out. I think she was just happy! I should make her watch 'Barney'! That will make her even more happy!" House cheered.

Cuddy twitched and Wilson said:

"Alright... That's creepy."

"Aw... Wilson needs a hug!" House said, hugging Wilson.

"House, let go." Wilson gasped, trying to breathe.

Anyways, with Rikki, Chase, Foreman, and Cameron, Rikki started to wake up.

"What the hell happened?" Rikki asked.

"You had an absent seizure after the MRI. We need to know if you have any past history of epilepsy." Foreman replied.

Rikki went silent for minutes on end.

"I... It was years ago..." Rikki said, her eyes widened.

There was a knock on the door the next second. It was a woman and a man.

"We're Rikki's parents! Let us in!" The man said.

Rikki grabbed her hair, shaking her head.

"Don't let them in!" Rikki cried. "They'll get mad! They always get mad!"

"What are you talking about?" Chase asked.

Rikki let go of her grip, and didn't reply.

Two hours later, in House's office, Cameron and Chase stood, talking to House.

"We found her history. She has a history of seizures since she was eight. It says she was riding her skateboard with a old helmet and fell on the sidewalk that led to her house's front door, and she had a massive bleed in her brain and brain damage from lack of oxygen." Cameron said.

"She also was completely terrified when her parents came. Think they traumatized her when she was young." Chase said.

"Her medical file states that the bleed in her brain was discovered a whole week and a half after the accident. How can parents not notice that?" Cameron stated.

"How about we get Taub and Kutner to check their house... Because anytime me and Foreman have to check the house, we either get mauled by rapid dogs, weasels, bears, fangirls, fanboys... I usually almost get in trouble with the cops..." Chase said.

Taub and Kutner walked into the room. Kutner took a short breath, saying:

"The patient went into V-Fib. We got her back after at least 5 tries."

"Then her airway closed. We tried to intubate her, didn't work. So, we had to put a trache in her throat." Taub said.

House looked up.

"Did you guys give her the warm fuzzies again?" House asked.

"What...?" Kutner asked.

"Kutner, the Death Kitty won't find you! So stop hiding!" House stated, happily.

Chase got out a baseball bat and hit House upside the head with it.

"There. He is starting to mentally scar everyone." Chase said.

House got back up. Everyone but House ran out of the room and went to the only place you would expect the regular House to go to...

"A night club full of sex-crazed women, Chase?" Cameron asked.

"I know, right? No human would ever think to find us here." Chase replied.

"Thirteen is having a blast." Wilson said.

"That's because she's into these things." Cameron said.

"True." Wilson said.

"But at least no-one will think to look for us here." Foreman said.

House popped out of no-where.

"Hello, bestiest friends!" House said.

"HE'S NOT HUMAN!!!!!" Wilson said, running out of the club with the rest of the group.

Back at the hospital, House went into the patients room. Rikki was dead asleep. Apparently, Cuddy already took the tube out of Rikki's throat. The team had finally caught up to House.

"Oh God..." Chase said.

All that could be heard was:

"HI RIKKI!??!"

A second of silence soon broke with a scream of bloody murder. House came out of the room with a big smile on his face.

"It's decided! She needs a lumbar puncture and take some of her bone marrow! And more happy blood tests!" House said, smiling creeply.

House nice is going to be updated again later... When I feel like it! Review if you are still alive!