Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin.

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Arthur maintained his silence as he led Merlin through the castle. His manservant was uncharacteristically quiet, and it was a trait Arthur surprisingly found rather disturbing. This was not how Merlin was supposed to be. He was supposed to be a bumbling idiot that had to be told to shut up more often than not. His mouth was supposed to run at a speed faster than his feet.

But then, he also wasn't supposed to be a sorcerer either.

Reaching his chambers, Arthur gestured for his friend to go inside. The young warlock paused momentarily in surprise before doing as asked. He came to an uncertain halt in front of Arthur's large desk, remaining in an awkward standing position long after the young king had sat down. Arthur too was unsure as to where Merlin stood but eventually reason won out and he sighed loudly, flicking a hand towards the chair opposite.

"Take a seat Merlin," he ordered. The warlock was quick to comply.

"…is there something I should-"

"Why did you choose to learn magic?"

The question startled Merlin, though he hardly knew why. It was the most obvious thing in the world to ask. Glancing down at his hands, he shrugged. "I did not choose magic. It chose me."

Arthur stared at him incredulously. "And just what the hell does that mean?"

Merlin's eyes were nearly frighteningly serious when they lifted to meet his. "It means I was born with it. That from the day I was born I could use it. Magic is to me what breathing is to you. Take it away…and I may as well die."

Personally, Arthur thought that be a little overdramatic but let it slide. Merlin always had been a bit of a girl. "So why come to Camelot?"

Here Merlin flushed bright red. "I didn't know magic was banned."

"Y-you didn't know?" Arthur blustered, mouth dropping open in shock.

"It's not like I'd ever been outside of my village!" the servant hastily defended. "I only came here because my mother told me too. She said…she…" Merlin's eyes lowered and his voice swapped to a whisper. "She told me that I would be able to learn…learn from Gaius." He shook his head shortly. "I suppose she wanted me to be able to control my magic and learn to use it for good."

"And have you?" came the sharp challenge. "Have you used your magic for good?"

The bitterness in those words had Merlin frowning despite his fear. "Magic is not evil Arthur," he informed sharply. "It is no more evil than a sword. A sword in the wrong man's hands can kill. In the right man's hands, it can defend and save lives. Magic is no different."

The logical explanation had Arthur blinking in surprise, having never thought about it in such a way.

"And I would never use my magic to hurt you," Merlin confessed honestly. "I…the mistake in the cave was mine. I never meant to attack you. I am sorry for that. I abused my magic, and I'm sorry."

Arthur looked away uncomfortably at the sincere apology. He cleared his throat before his frame went rigid, blue eyes painfully cold once more when they turned back to him. "You told me to find that sorcerer – the one that killed my father! You killed him!"

"I know!"

Whatever assault he had been planning was halted by that, Arthur's hand already dropping from where it was reaching for his scabbard. "Explain."

"There was no sorcerer in the woods," Merlin babbled, hands knitting together nervously. "I used an aging spell to make myself look old. I thought it was the only way I could get you to agree. And I did the spell…and I know it didn't work…"

"Didn't work?" Arthur screamed. "It killed my father!"

"But only because Morgana put that charm on him!"

The young Pendragon froze. "What did you say?" he hissed, icy tone for once not aimed at his servant.

Merlin met his gaze levelly. "Morgana did something. I don't know how, but she put a charm, a spell…whatever you wish to call it…she put it on Uther. It made any magic used on him to the opposite…I…instead of healing your father it…it…"

Arthur sunk back into his chair, his head dropping into his hands. "So Morgana killed my father."

"Arthur, I-"

"But why?"

The question bewildered Merlin until it was expanded upon.

"Why would you try to save him? If my father had ever discovered the truth about you…"

Merlin just smiled sadly. "He was your father. I would rather see you happy than see him dead. You are more important to me."

"More important than your own kind?"

The warlock shifted uncomfortably. "I try to not make it come to that."

Arthur hummed in agreement before leaning back in his chair, eyes calculating as they raked over his figure. "Anything else I should know?"

"…the Great Dragon is still alive…?"

"What?"

Merlin scrambled out of his chair as Arthur erupted from his. Firmly keeping the table between them, Merlin backed up, hands raised in surrender. "Arthur, I know what he did and I…I didn't want it to happen but you have to understand!"

"I have to…you didn't want it to happen?" the king's anger became fierce. "Is that your way of telling me you set it free?"

The guilty silence was all he needed to hear before he knew it to be so. Without thought he was tearing forward, a cry wrenching itself from his throat. Merlin was pinned to the ground before he could properly comprehend what was going on, a sword tip pressed to his neck. He tried to argue but the blade only sunk in deeper, his frame locking up completely when he felt a hot bead of blood trickle down his throat.

"Do you know what you did?" Arthur screamed. "Do you know how many people died? How many you killed?"

"I had no choice!" Merlin retaliated, ignoring the biting pain that came as the sword sliced through his delicate skin. "I had to make a deal with him. If I didn't agree to set him free, Camelot would have fallen! They would have succumbed to the sleeping sickness and the Knights of Medhir would have killed us all! I had to swear on my mother's life!"

Arthur paused at that, his sword slowly dropping to his side, eyes searching for a lie he could not find. "You swore on her life?"

"You were falling asleep – everyone was! I had no choice!...I had no more hollow promises to give."

The tears in his eyes showed the depth of his honesty and Arthur finally consented, pushing himself back to his feet and moving to sheath his sword. The blood on it distracted him and Arthur almost looked horrified when he caught sight of the blood running down his servant's neck and staining his neckerchief. Wiping the blood off the blade quickly, Arthur held out a hand. Merlin stared at it dubiously for a moment before cautiously accepting the hand up.

"It seems we are both guilty of the same fault," Arthur murmured, staring at his blade idly. "You said you would never use your magic against me and I vowed no one would hurt you, old friend. It seems neither of us can keep our word."

"Arthur…" Merlin breathed, tentatively rubbing his neck and cringing when his hand came away red and slick.

The sight seemed to sicken Arthur somewhat and the king rummaged through his drawers until he found an old handkerchief, throwing it in Merlin's general direction. The servant stumbled to catch it and Arthur could only roll his eyes. It seemed that some things did not change. For that, he was immensely grateful. A world where Merlin was not a fool just did not seem right.

As Merlin held the fabric to his neck, Arthur dropped back into his chair, humming in disapproval. "It seems I have allowed us to get off topic?"

"Hn?" Merlin asked confusedly.

Arthur shot him a stern look. "I'm supposed to be finding out just who it was that threatened you, who made you choose between me and Ga-…who made you make this choice."

The servant's gaze darkened to a level Arthur had not known him capable of. A lightning bolt joined the hateful glower and he could only wonder if perhaps Percival's theory regarding Merlin and the weather was correct.

"Merlin," he called, torn between trying to be…well, kind he supposed and his usual impatient self. "What can you tell me about the man?"

"Oh, I can tell you everything," Merlin muttered, tone sending shivers down Arthur's spine. "I've seen him far more times than I would like. He should not have threatened me."

"Merlin!" Arthur would be the first to say that this new side of Merlin was almost terrifying. "What was his name?"

"Amyas." The name was spat out like a curse.

"Amyas?" he repeated dumbly. "I've heard that name before…I heard it from…Agravaine!"

So thrilled was he that his uncle might give them a clue, Arthur failed to notice the way his servant seized up at that name. Without giving Merlin time to protest, he ordered the younger to follow him before he made his way out of his chambers. His every intention was to find Agravaine right then and discover whatever he might know about this man.

That plan was put on hold though when, out of the corner of his eye, he saw Merlin come to an abrupt halt behind him. An impatient demand was on the tip of his tongue but it promptly died when he realised where they were: the junction that led either the stairs to the lower level, where the main hall was, or the halls that led to Gaius' chambers. Merlin was staring down the corridor blankly, all but rooted to the spot.

"…Merlin?" he hated how tentative his voice sounded.

His servant swallowed thickly before turning to Arthur, tears brimming in his eyes. "I didn't even get a chance to say goodbye."

The next thing Arthur knew, his manservant was on the ground, head buried in his knees as sobs overtook his body. "Merlin!" he cried worriedly. Jogging to the servant's side, he hesitated a moment before placing a hand on a shaking shoulder. "Merlin, I'm sorry."

If anything Merlin's tears only intensified at that. Huffing in displeasure, Arthur rocked back on his heels, contemplating whether he ought to find Gwen. He jumped when he felt Merlin abruptly shift under his hand, wide eyes staring up at him. "…Arthur," he choked, "D-don't…don't leave me…I…not alone…"

The pleas were jumbled but Arthur understood. Repressing a sigh and trying to smile through his awkwardness, he brought his feet in front of him so he could sit comfortably. The hand Merlin had shaken off in his movements was returned to the shoulder it had been resting on previously. At Merlin's hopeful gaze, he nodded, watching the servant's eyes melt in gratitude before he buried them back in his knees, sobs returning in full-force.

"It's my turn to return the favour Merlin," Arthur mumbled. "As you waited for me, I will wait for you. Take your time and mourn properly…for this is one man who deserved your tears."

And so, Merlin wept.

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A/N: I apologise about the delay. My mother has had some serious health issues these past few weeks so that's why this is late. On a positive note, isn't the ending to the chapter nice? I thought some crying and some as-close-to-hugging-as-Arthur-will-get was in order. Reviews are much appreciated as always; I always reply so feel free to ask things or leave suggestions! :)

~DeathGod777