A blank white ceiling, where am I? Why does my head hurt? His eyes readjusted to his setting. He lay in a bed with plain white sheets, surrounded by plain white walls, and across from him stood a plain white door that was shut tightly; very frustrating. What is that blinding light? He turned his head to find a window that was left ajar. He began to get up to close it, but a searing pain stopped him. What the hell? He was not used to dealing with pain. That couldn't stop him though. He brushed his long raven locks out of his face as he began the irritatingly slow process of emerging from his bed. Sometime during this excruciating experience, he heard footsteps approaching, but he ignored them.

"Oi, Kanda, I thought you'd never wake up!" Lavi laughed. Kanda paused, but did not look up.

"Damn Usagi go away, I don't want to see anyone right now." Except maybe him…

"I just came to see how you were; it's been a week since the accident after all."

"A FUCKING WEEK?" Kanda was shocked. He hadn't realized so much time had passed. "Where's Allen?" Lavi raised an eyebrow,

"Not Moyashi?"

"Answer the damn question!" Kanda yelled, reaching to draw Mugen only to find it missing. He cursed to himself; it was like he had lost a part of himself.

"Umm… well… not too well…" Kanda jumped out of bed, but was quickly sent to the floor with a sudden wave of nausea. He had forgotten his condition…again.

"Whoa, Yuu, don't move. You should go back to bed. You hit your head really hard."

"No. If you don't tell me where he is, I'll just go find him myself." And with that Kanda stood up, careful not to move too quickly, and walked past Lavi through the door. He was going to find that damn Moyashi if it was the last thing he did. If he had been so banged up from simply fainting, he could only imagined how bad of a state Allen would be in. Plus, he had finally regained his memories. He wanted to see that Moyashi's smile. Not his usual fake smile, but a real smile that showed in his eyes.

"Fine, I'll show you if you're that determined. It would be bad if you got lost wandering the halls."

"Che." Kanda followed Lavi out the door and through the maze of halls. He was slightly amazed by the fact that Lavi knew where he was going, but then again it had been a week. What the fuck, are they trying to get people lost? Kanda wondered. He was beginning to doubt the fact that they'd ever reach their destination when they finally came to a stop.

"We've arrived."

"About damn time," Kanda mumbled. He reached his hand out to the doorknob hesitantly. His head was starting to spin from all the movement, and he was nervous. Lavi placed his hand gently over his hand, and slowly opened the door.

"It's okay, you're fine." To Lavi's surprise, Kanda didn't react to his intimate gestures.

"Holy fuck," Kanda stood, mouth gaping, body trembling, and completely horrified at the awful sight displayed in front of him.

At first all he could see were machines, wires, and bandages, but as he looked past the objects obscuring his view, Allen became visible. It was not a pretty sight.

"Right after you fainted, the chandelier fell on him. The doctors say it's a miracle he's still breathing. They don't expect him to hold on much longer."Lavi whispered with a devastated face. He had always really loved Allen. Kanda's face however did not show the same defeat.

"Che, he'll be fine. He's not a weak person despite his fucking Moyashi appearance." He smirked, "He was the most powerful exorcist at the Order after all." Lavi stared at Kanda with disbelief.

"You remember?"

"Che, why do you think I fainted?"

"Oh, well… I'll leave you two now. See you later Yuu!" Lavi ran out of the door before Kanda could kill him, but that didn't stop him from envisioning some pretty gruesome thoughts. Eventually though, he turned to face Allen. I finally remember and this is how you repay me. Kanda couldn't help but be frustrated. He was sure the fucking beansprout was just messing with him. It didn't really matter though if he woke up or not, because Kanda planned on killing him the moment those silver eyes opened.

He leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on Allen's left cheek. Come back soon baka Moyashi.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

The past few days had been rough on Kanda. Although his memories had returned, there was still an element of mystery. It was as if his memories had been fully returned, with a little extra. He had extremely fuzzy recollections of a past life. The strange thing was, all of the same people were involved; Lenalee, Lavi, Komui, Allen, they were all there. He had trying like crazy to remember more, but he was stuck in between; remembering some, but not all.

This is what he thought of as he sat by the bedside of Allen Walker, trying to ignore the seemingly lifeless figure in front of him. He didn't really know what to do. He couldn't move on and forget his lover, but he felt pathetic and useless sitting here for days upon end. It didn't look as if Allen would awake anytime soon. He just lacked in one thing;

Motivation

His motivation in life was practically lying on his deathbed at the moment, and never before had he felt so lost. He almost didn't notice as he passed from the world of reality to the world of dreams, or shall I say, nightmares.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

He was sitting on his bed staring out of the window. Although it was his bedroom, nothing looked like his. There was something familiar about it though, as well. It was very bare, save the small table, bed and lamp. Sitting on the table was an hourglass containing a partially wilted lotus flower. Some of the

petals

lay

gently

on

the

bottom. It sent shivers down his spine.

Knock, knock. A gentle rapping was heard at the door. He had lost all control of his body. He stood up and walked to the door in a robotic fashion. He knew something horrendous waited behind the door, yet he continued to trudge forward. He walked on.

Just

Keep

Walking….

After what felt like ages he reached the door and opened it.

"What took you so long, baKanda?" Allen's face distorted as he pronounced the last syllable of his name. His pale face and white hair darkened, and were replaced with

gray

skin

and

black

hair.

He was not the same Allen he knew. He drew Mugen to slay the awful beast.

"What are you doing Kanda? I thought you loved me." Allen taunted.

"YOU AREN'T ALLEN!" Kanda delivered the fateful blow, gasping in horror as he watched the final few moments of Allen's life. His skin and hair color were restored, and he lay motionless on the floor.

Silent

tears

streamed

down

Kanda's

face.

*Allen was dead.*

To those of you who found this unclear, the last part was Kanda's dream. The weird formatting is just an effect to make it… strange. Sorry for the slightly delayed update, and shorter chapter, but I hope you enjoyed it!

Reviews are always appreciated :)

-pathless ^-^